Wednesday, March 26, 2025

Robert St. John: No Sign, No Menu, Just Home

No one signs up for a European tour expecting to have lunch in a stranger’s home in a village so small, it doesn’t show up on most maps. But that’s exactly where my guests found themselves—deep in the Andalusian hills, breaking bread in the homes of Spanish women who didn’t speak our language but knew exactly how to make us feel at home. This wasn’t a restaurant. There was no menu, no bill. Just food, laughter, and the kind of hospitality that sticks with you longer than any museum ever could.

The journey to get there felt like a step back in time—narrow roads winding past olive groves, cell signals fading with each turn. Eventually, we rolled into Alfarnatejo, a quiet village of less than 400 souls tucked into the mountains of southern Spain. No hotels, no tour buses, not even a café. Just whitewashed houses, stone paths, and a few kitchens where local mothers and grandmothers were already at work, stirring pots and setting tables for guests they’d never met. 

This isn’t a place tourists typically find. And that’s exactly the point.

From day one, these RSJ Yonderlust tours were never meant to be surface-level sightseeing. The goal has always been to dig deeper—to take people beyond the postcards and into the heart of the place. I want them to taste, see, and feel what’s real. To connect, not just consume.

And that’s what brought my group to Alfarnatejo, Spain.

We’d already done the big things. Stood in front of El Greco, Goya, and Velázquez at the Prado in Madrid. Ate lunch in a cave. Zip-lined over a river in Toledo, then sat down for dinner on a rooftop in the shadow of history. We’d walked through the awe-inspiring Mezquita in Córdoba, strolled among Iberian pigs in Jabugo, taken flamenco lessons, and watched the real thing performed with all the passion and fire you’d hope for.

We crossed into Gibraltar, stood on one continent and looked across the water at another. Had fish and chips by the sea. Met the monkeys on top of the Rock. In Málaga, we cruised the Mediterranean at sunset and feasted on seafood by the shore. In Valencia, we watched the Fallas fireworks from a 10th-floor balcony with a catered lunch and full bar. Learned to make paella, then ate the whole thing. In Barcelona, we dined with my friend Chef Daniel Rueda—his ribs still as good as I remembered—and zipped through the streets in little GPS-guided, two-seater cars.

All of it was great. But, for me, nothing compared to this simple lunch in the homes of Spanish housewives.

On a quiet afternoon, we left the city behind, boarded a bus, and headed out into the hills. There were some puzzled looks. Maybe even a few of my guests were wondering if I’d lost my travel sense. But, in my years as a European travel host, I’ve learned this: when the road gets narrow, when the scenery turns wild, and the GPS doesn’t quite know where you are, that’s when the best stuff happens.

It started years ago in Tuscany. Some of the most authentic moments we had came after going the long way around. So now, I lean into it. That’s where the gold is.

Just as days earlier on a pig farm outside Seville. We walked a dirt trail into the cork trees and suddenly there they were—those big, content Iberian pigs, living a good life. From acorns to jamón, we saw the whole process. Real food. Real people. Real stories.

But this? This was something else entirely.

Instead of a farm or a restaurant, we were welcomed into private homes. No signs out front. No menu. Just a few gracious Spanish women, some with aprons and flour-dusted hands, waiting for us with warm smiles and hot ovens.

Each group of six-to-nine guests were sent to different houses, and each host cooked a meal from scratch—family recipes passed down for generations. Meatballs stewed in saffron. Potatoes slow-cooked in garlic and olive oil. Chickpeas, tomatoes, crusty bread, and maybe a little local wine for those who wanted it. There was no chef coat in sight. Just women who had cooked this way their entire lives. For their husbands, their children, their neighbors.


 Now, for us.

There’s something about being invited into someone’s home that shifts the whole experience. It’s not performance. It’s not polished. It’s personal. They weren’t cooking for us, they were cooking with us in mind.

And we were honored to be there.

Out of the 60+ tours I’ve hosted—across Italy, France, England, Scotland, the Netherlands, and Spain—this is one of the most local things we’ve ever done. Only two of my groups have gotten to do it so far. This group in Spain was only the second to do it. It won’t be the last. If you’ve ever wondered what it feels like to travel this way—this is it.

Because this is the heart of it. This is what it’s all about.

When I started RSJ Yonderlust Tours, the idea wasn’t just to take people places. It was to bring them into places—into homes, kitchens, family tables. To go where the locals go. To eat what— and where— the locals eat. To step into real conversations, real culture, and leave with something more than souvenirs.

The museums and landmarks are great. So are the views and the big meals. But it’s the simple stuff—the kind you don’t plan for—that sticks. Sitting at a kitchen table in a little village, eating food made by somebody’s grandmother. That’s the part that stays with you. That’s what turns a trip into something real.

After Spain, I flew to Tuscany, where I’m with the first of three more groups. From here, it’s on to Holland and Belgium, then England and Scotland. Some of the folks on those tours have been with me eight times. Others, five or six. Yonderlust veterans. It might’ve looked like group travel on paper, but it never felt like it. That’s never been the RSJ Yonderlust Tours way. From day one, it’s just felt like friends exploring Europe together. 

I’ll be home, ready to hit the ground running, in mid-May.

Over the years, more than 1,300 guests have traveled with me on these journeys. Each trip is different, but the mission is the same: dive deep, get local, connect. That’s the promise.

And that little lunch in a tiny Spanish village, cooked by women who may not speak our language but know exactly how to make us feel welcome—might be the best example of it yet.

Sometimes the best part of a trip isn’t something you planned. It’s a door swinging open, a meal made from scratch, and that quiet moment when it hits you—this is why you came. No app or itinerary can match what happens around a real table, in a real home, with people who mean it.

Onward.

 

 

White Bean Soup

This recipe is Creole New Orleans meets Tuscan white bean soup.


¼ c.     Bacon fat
3 c.      Onion, diced
3 c.      Carrot, diced
3 c.      Celery, diced
½ c.     White wine
½ c.     Ham, diced
2 tsp    Poultry Seasoning 
2 tsp    House Herb Blend 
2 tsp    House Seasoning Blend
1 TB    Worcestershire sauce
2 TB    Kosher salt
2 tsp    Hot sauce
1 tsp    White pepper
1 ea.    15 oz. can white navy beans, drained, rinsed and pureed with 4 c. pork stock
5 ea.    15 oz. can white navy beans, drained, rinsed, kept whole 
2 c.      Pork stock (recipe page xxx)
¼ c.     Pesto
Reserved hock meat from Pork Stock recipe

In a stockpot, sauté onion, carrot and celery in bacon fat for 5-7 minutes over medium heat, stirring frequently.  Add wine and cook 3-4 more minutes.

Add ham and seasonings and cook 7-8 minutes.

Add the pureed beans, whole beans and the 2 cups of pork stock and bring to a boil.  Immediately reduce heat and add the chopped hock meat and pesto. Stir well and simmer for 30-45 minutes.

Yield: 1 gallon



House Seasoning Blend

2 TB   Iodized salt
2 TB    Fresh ground black pepper
2 TB    Garlic powder
1 TB    Onion powder
1 TB    Lemon pepper

 Combine all ingredients

Yield: ½ cup


House Herb Blend
2 TB Dried oregano
2 TB Dried basil
2 TB Dried thyme
1 TB Dried rosemary
1 TB Dried marjoram

Combine all ingredients

Yield: ½ cup


 

 



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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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