If your kids are looking for something to do for fun after graduation tonight, look no further than this post.
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The Kingfish's Favorite Posts
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- Jackson's water bond failure: The REST of the story.
- Time to return fire on Banks
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
42 comments:
Lord have mercy
Over/under on the amount of gunshots that occur at this event?
I am only surprised this is in Clinton, not Jackson.
Sounds like Clinton is swirling the bowl and will soon follow Jackson.......
Exhibit A of why people (who can) flee Jackson. Just gross.
Security ? Hell, it won't matter. There WILL be gunfire.
OH CPD...... aim straight.
Just a 1/2 mile east of Clinton city limits, across from the fire station, right next to J&J Liquor. Ya'll come see us!
Flyer says Jackson, Clarion-Ledger says Clinton?
Not in Clinton. The doors would never open if they tried this in Clinton. But nice try. Clinton is doing just fine thank you. Check JJ article just yesterday on school scores and then make your excuses why your school came in behind Clinton.
A testosterone charged event!
If successful, the shelves will be empty of bumpy gin for miles around.
time to get turnt....
"KNOWLEDGE IS THE KEY" (but $10.00 will get you a pitcher of cold brew)
Clinton has swirled for a long long time
Clinton public schools are a far cry of what they were 5 years ago. Clinton HS is the next forest hill no question. People flooding into the apartments in Clinton and coming from Raymond south Jackson schools like wingfield Lanier provine and Jim hill… these students don’t even do homework or understand the assignments and then mamas get mad when Clinton schools administrators do there job and give the student a failing grade they claim it’s teachers fault
The truth is these parents or students have never really been in a school that demands academic discipline and think everyday is a party or funday. It’s hard to find teachers willing to stay at Clinton schools now.
Obviously, as you can see there's nothing like having a well-rounded education. Congrats to the grads.
Baby Got Back
ha you know I am a southern born white guy. As teenagers we gathered in pastures, drank beer, partied, had fights, whole 9. Most of you probably engaged in behaviors similar to this in some fashion.
Do not judge these people because they put an advertisement up and called it twerkfest or whatever, since yall know damn well we have all been to a twerkfest at some point in life, it just wasnt called that.
glass houses and stones folks, glass houses and stones.
One thing is for sure, it will definitely be quite an entertaining and interesting event
9:49 clearly has a beef, maybe because you can’t get hired there? The stats refute your comment, just look at the test scores kingfish posted yesterday. Clinton is doing just fine. Some people confuse “great” schools with “all white” schools.
The closest person guessing how many rounds will be fired will get a ticket refund.
@9:49
I agree with your statement about Clinton schools. These parents that come from JPS and hinds co schools are totally lost on academics and all they seem to think is having cake the entire hour of class period for there high school kid. One mom called me asking why her daughter had homework on her birthday “week” I was shocked
Another asked why we make these children do homework and that’s what class is for. It’s an entirely different culture at the schools these students and parents are use to. They always show up to complain though. I’m more surprised they don’t seem to understand diversity. Most are use to attending schools 99% black and at Clinton is more diverse. Asian Hispanic white Indian mid eastern… it’s a whole new world to them.
9:52 "Well-rounded". Hmmmm.
A lot of JJ readers live in Clinton and like it. Live and let live. But rest assured, Clinton does not promote or allow twerking contests.
10:07, nope. We don't all do drugs. We don't all drink. And for dang sure we all have NOT been to a twerkfest. You 12, or just still act like it?
@11:20
Nope, As a matter of fact I rarely even have a drink these days, just not a hypocrite
Hey, 11:20: You're right. We don't all go to twerkfests. But we all would like to. Just once. Ask any baptist preacher, starting with any of them named in the Guidepost Solutions report. He'll tell you.
so. what’s worse. the event OR that the clarion ledger is promoting it this?
There won't be a single woman in attendance that is as hot as those in the picture.
Not that much different than white bars on the beach having wet tee shirt contests. Except of course we don’t start shooting each other.
No cover charge for scantily clad ladies. Oldest trick in the book to get the young men to pony up for that cover charge.
@kingfish I notice you have not posted on the subject of the Ulverde school shooting. With the amount of public concern this event has generated I am surprised you do not feel the need to take a position on the myriad of concerns it has raised, such as the ineffective police response, proposed gun control laws, and NRA convention cancellations.
As they used to write in the CL's Society Section, "A good time will be had by all".....
I'm trying to talk some friends into going. If we show up early and get in free....
Brazilian butt lift? No normal female butt looks like that, even with the thong. Good Lord! What have we come to????
I don’t get the Clinton hate. #2 in the state in reading scores? If they teach the test, so be it. That’s the incentive the state gave them. I have noted multiple 36 ACTs yearly coming out of Clinton. Multiple. Each year.
#2 in the state in reading. Not to mention 2022 state championships in soccer, basketball and track. But keep running them down while your B ranked Rankin schools continue to fill Holmes-Ridgeland and Hinds-Rankin.
Twerk? I just want someone to teach me how to dougie...teach teach me how to dougie.
Google mapping the address has address as Jackson.
Well,they're going to do this somewhere
... even if "Ojay the DJ is not in da mix".
But I guess Flag Chapel Road is better than shutting down
I-55.
I think I caught AIDS just from looking at that flyer
Anyone want to carpool from JA?
I was kicked off of Twerking. They didn't like my views on being pro Trump.
What are the odds that anyone who actually reads the C-L will attend this function?
Clinton has a law that bans twerking?
Can you provide a copy?
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