Friday, July 22, 2022

Pigott Claims he was Fired

 This post is a reprint of Anna Wolfe's story that appeared in Mississippi Today. 

The state welfare department has fired Brad Pigott, the former U.S. attorney it contracted to claw back millions in misspent federal funds from dozens of people in Mississippi’s sprawling welfare scandal.

The termination comes about a week after Pigott filed a subpoena on the University of Southern Mississippi Athletic Foundation for its communication with several notable people, including former Gov. Phil Bryant, to get to the bottom of why it received $5 million in welfare funds to build a volleyball stadium.

“All I did, and I believe all that caused me to be terminated from representing the department or having anything to do with the litigation, was to try to get the truth about all of that,” Pigott told Mississippi Today hours after his firing on Friday. “People are going to go to jail over this, at least the state should be willing to find out the truth of what happened.”

It is unclear how Pigott’s termination will affect the welfare agency’s civil lawsuit, which promised to probe players in the welfare scheme and answer questions that current criminal proceedings wouldn’t. Just last week, Pigott had scheduled depositions with key players in the scheme, including former NFL quarterback Brett Favre.

Pigott said he was not given a reason for his termination, but that Mississippi Department of Human Services officials told him it was not related to the quality of his legal work.

Officials at the Mississippi Department of Human Services and the Attorney General’s Office, which had to sign off on Pigott’s contract and is included on the civil lawsuit, did not return calls Friday. Pigott said both agencies were aware of his intent to subpoena the athletic foundation days before he filed.

Recent revelations about the welfare scandal, originally investigated by former Bryant campaign manager and Bryant appointee State Auditor Shad White, inspired former state and federal officials to question whether White’s close political ties to Bryant could have jeopardized an impartial investigation.

“I am sure they can find a loyal Republican lawyer to do the work,” said Pigott, a former President Bill Clinton appointee.

Pigott’s firing comes just days after he filed legal documents zoning in on high-profile players in the scheme — including Bryant and Favre — that have so far escaped legal scrutiny for their involvement.

Mississippi Today uncovered in April that Bryant began assisting Favre with a venture called Prevacus just days before the company received a commitment of $2 million in welfare funds. The money came from a nonprofit run by then-First Lady Deborah Bryant’s friend Nancy New, who was given authority to spend tens of millions of funds from MDHS. Texts showed the former governor was poised to accept shares in Prevacus after he left office, until the February 2020 arrests derailed the arrangement.

READ MORE: Phil Bryant had his sights on a payout as welfare funds flowed to Brett Favre

New, a defendant in the civil suit who also pleaded guilty to charges of bribery and fraud, also recently alleged for the first time publicly that Gov. Bryant directed her to make a $1.1 million welfare payment to Favre.

In early May, Pigott filed a civil suit against 38 people or companies in an attempt to recoup roughly $24 million in welfare money the state says they squandered. These funds were supposed to address poverty in the poorest state in the nation.

Pigott was blocked, however, from including in his initial complaint anything about the $5 million in welfare funds that went to build the USM volleyball stadium — a payment inspired by Favre.

“I was forbidden to do so by political operatives who regard themselves as higher up than the director of the MDHS,” he told Mississippi Today.

MDHS is an agency directly overseen by Gov. Tate Reeves’ office. Reeves appointed the current MDHS director tasked with cleaning up the scandal, Bob Anderson, who worked with Pigott in the local U.S. attorneys office in the 1990s and informed Pigott of his termination Friday.

Before Favre connected with New to fund Prevacus, the pharmaceutical start he was investing in, he had sought her help on the volleyball project.

“She has strong connections and gave me 5 million for Vball facility via grant money,” he texted Jake Vanlandingham, founder of Prevacus, in late 2018.

To justify the payments, New’s nonprofit Mississippi Community Education Center disguised the $5 million agreement with the athletic foundation as a lease of the university’s athletic facilities, according to the indictment against Nancy New’s son Zach New. The nonprofit claimed it would use campus property to host events and programs for the area’s “underserved population,” a nod to the actual purpose of the grant funds it was using. In exchange, the athletic foundation would build the volleyball stadium, which it called a “wellness center,” and include offices in the building where the nonprofit could host anti-poverty programs. This never occurred

Auditor White questioned the $5 million payment in his explosive 2020 audit of the Mississippi Department of Human Services. Alfred Rankins, commissioner of the Institutions of Higher Learning, denied in a letter to White that the board had any involvement in this scheme, to which White responded, “Instead of quibbling, perhaps your time could be better spent providing the public with a plan for the Wellness Center to be used by the at-risk community in Hattiesburg and providing that to me in a letter. This way, the TANF money that was paid for the Center might be used to benefit the community it was intended to benefit.”

Pigott argues the lease agreement was intentionally deceitful.

“It’s obvious from published information that Brett Favre admitted in a text that that $5 million in Department of Human Services grant money was, in his mind, a gift to him, which he made clear was to absolve him of paying that money himself to his alma mater to build such a volleyball facility,” Pigott told Mississippi Today. “That was wrong and it was against the law and it cost the TANF program $5 million.”

“And it’s also obvious from public information,” he continued, “that the USM Athletic Foundation knew all of this and agreed to and signed a sham, fraudulent, so-called lease agreement with Nancy New’s entity pretending that the $5 million was to allow Nancy New’s entity to use the football stadium at USM, and the basketball arena at USM, and the baseball arena at USM, and the parking lots associated therewith, all of which was a lie, as the USM athletic foundation well knew.”

Bryant told Mississippi Today in April that he was aware of Favre’s USM volleyball vision.

“That volleyball thing kept coming up, and popping up, and then it’d go away,” he said. 

In the fall of 2019, after the auditor’s investigation had begun, Bryant hosted a meeting at his office with Favre, Nancy New and Bryant’s newly appointed welfare director Christopher Freeze. Favre had been complaining that he “owed” over $1 million on the volleyball stadium. Bryant said New asked in the meeting for more money for the building, which was under construction, and Bryant said he told her “no.”

Pigott subpoenaed communication between USM athletic foundation board members or employees and Phil Bryant, Deborah Bryant, Favre, Nancy New, her sons Zach New and Jess New, former welfare department director John Davis and retired wrestler Ted “Teddy” DiBiase Jr. 

“It is also obvious from published information that the number of lies that the USM Athletic Foundation told on a lease agreement is a larger number than perhaps anybody else told on paper in the course of this entire pathetic story of misuse of money intended not to go as gifts to famous celebrities or to athletic programs of universities but instead to go to the neediest families in the state,” Pigott said.

Pigott had also filed a notice of depositions that he scheduled between August and November for the following individuals: Zach New, Jess New, Nicholas Coughlin, Adam Such, Nancy New, Christi Webb, Paul LaCoste, Jacob VanLandingham, Brett Favre, Teddy DiBiase Jr., Brian Smith, Ted DiBiase Sr. and Heart of David Ministries, and Austin Smith. It’s unclear if the state will move forward with these hearings without Pigott.

 Kingfish note: A couple of notes.  Pigott implies the Governor or his cronies intervened to stop Pigott.  Um, there is no love between the Tate and Phil camps.  Animosity probably is an accurate description to describe the relationship. Pigott is somewhat stretching it if that is what he means.  The current head of DHS was a Jim Hood lawyer for several years as well so he is probably not protecting anyone in the Bryant bunch. 

 There is also a small matter not reported in the article.  The Attorney General approved the grant to Southern Miss.  It is a safe bet Favre's lawyer will tell the Attorney General and DHS they can't have it both ways.  The AG approved the use of the grant to build the wellness center five years ago yet the AG now says it's not ok? Good luck.  

 


 

 

72 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is bullshit. He was going to get to the truth! Who approved the firing? What are they hiding?

Anonymous said...

This is bullshit. He was going to get to the truth! Who approved the firing? What are they hiding?

Anonymous said...

KF, are you implying that a Mississippi Today writer might have an agenda?!

Horrors!

Are we to suppose that the sun will rise in the east tomorrow?

Anonymous said...

Anna Wolfe is a badass!

Anonymous said...

Known Brad a long time and politically on opposite ends of spectrum but this story really seems to have long legs. Really a “shake your head” moment. Maybe I’m missing something but this reeks of a cover-up. For many years I’ve been an opponent of federal government overreach but a serious federal investigation and oversight may be the only way to sort this incestuous mess out. It’s very discouraging.

Anonymous said...

The Kingfish Note is shortsighted and fails to appreciate the relationships involved.

Anonymous said...

Big Phil Bryant coverup!
Call in the Feds!

Anonymous said...

@ "For many years I’ve been an opponent of federal government overreach but a serious federal investigation and oversight may be the only way to sort this incestuous mess out. It’s very discouraging.":

It's not much of an overreach for the feds to investigate fraudulent and illegal use of federal funds.

Anonymous said...

Ordering popcorn in bulk. This shit is gonna get interesting, and might take some of the attention off Chok partying in Atlanta with his dope boys while Jackson is suffering from major hot and cold temperature shifts wreaking havoc on the infrastructure.

Or maybe not.

County Cletus said...

He was to close.

Anonymous said...

He sure seems to be getting close to the line re atty/client privilege

Anonymous said...

Yeah this is almost as bad as these fat welfare recipient types who get in line at the grocery store in front of me with steaks, crab legs, and cookies and three crying kids and no husband.... It's about time we spent some of that welfare money on something constructive like a football stadium for Ole Miss or State or even USM, not volleyball... and catch some of these jobless welfare cheats who live free on my tax money... I'll bet ol Farve can still play...

Random thoughts from a real taxpaying Mississippian.

Anonymous said...

This is so blatant. Things have gone beyond the stage of quiet discreet legal manipulation. It's time, Every man for himself!

Anonymous said...

"He sure seems to be getting close to the line re atty/client privilege"

Just who do you think his 'client' is? You'd be wrong if you think his client is the welfare department. His client is me. And you. And the rest of the citizens of the state. His contract is with the state, not with people at DHS or Bryant, Shad, Fitch, Tater or any others he might have mentioned in anything you read above.

This whole development is going to be 'blood in the water' for the shark named Bennie.

The comment regarding the reporter having 'an agenda' is nonsense. Since when does thorough digging and reporting of facts represent an agenda.

Neither Anna nor Kingfish seem to have bothered to look into the terms of the Pigott's contract, under what conditions it could be terminated and by whom, specifically. Surely that's public information.

Anonymous said...

It said officials from MDHS, and the AGs office had to sign off (or not renew) his contract. Is Fitch feeling strong coming off the Dobbs ruling, and covering for the Republican machine in Mississippi?

Anonymous said...

Like @11:34 said, poor people stealing a little money to buy food is much worse than rich people stealing a lot of money from real taxpaying Mississippians Just feels better when you get ripped off by rich folks. And, sadly that thought wasn't random. Sheesh.

Anonymous said...

Transparency Mississippi shows that Pigott still has another week on a one-year $75,000 contract. Doesn’t appear he even got “fired.” Very unusual that that a state attorney would speak so openly to a reporter about a potential matter. Either Pigott’s client MDHS allowed it, or he’s being awfully cavalier with attorney-client privilege. Probably a lot more to this non-renewal, but we’ll never hear it. Wolfe and Ganuchow have a conspiracy theory to craft, and a narrative about Lynn Fitch “firing” an attorney who was complaining about Deputy Pheel’s alma mater gets them clicks.

Anonymous said...

If Brad was allowed to get to the bottom of what was going on, it would have eventually exposed some things that some very influential people in this state don't want to be exposed. Political corruption is rampant in Mississippi and there are a few enablers that benefit from it. It's as bad now (or worse) as it was in Louisiana back in the day. Those enablers are still pulling the strings in Mississippi politics. And have been for a long time. Not a single major decision is made at the state level without the blessing or direction of those puppet masters. The sooner they are out of Mississippi politics the better. Either from dying off from natural or accidental causes or being arrested. The latter will never happen, so all we have to hope for is the former.

Anonymous said...

I know Brad. We vehemently disagree on a lot of issues but the man's integrity is beyond reproach unlike most of the people involved in this fiasco. I don't know where the rat is, but I smell one. Somebody hit a panic button to fire him and I can only speculate in my mind which member of the cast of characters in state government got scared.

Anonymous said...

3:15: that’s a cute argument but not how the bar would see it.

Anonymous said...

Anna Wolfe is a muckraking clown.

Anonymous said...

Corruption like this tends to prosper in one-party states like Mississippi.

Anonymous said...

Re: Kingfish's note: The firing of Pigott is not a Tate v. Phil thing. It is a MSGOP thing. Protect the party, protect the brand, protect the power. The powers behind MSGOP are who made this happen. It boils down to their bottom lines.

Anonymous said...

Brad was getting too close, about to depose the whole bunch, including Favre. So we see Mississippi’s version of a Saturday Night Massacre. The business about his $75k contract being about to expire is a red herring. Such contracts are automatically renewed for a new term and additional amount of money in the normal course of things.

Now, KF’s point about the blessing of IHL and the AG is a good one for the defense, but looking at this thing from above: $5 million earmarked for poor people going to Mr. Favre’s alma mater for a volleyball facility, at his urging? Stinks big time.

Anonymous said...

8:49 - You give Favre (alone) too much credit. Don't forget who (along with his wife) are also alumni of USM and in tight with Favre. Bryant lied when he claimed he said 'no' on the request for additional money to finish the USM deal and testimony from others in the room at the time will confirm that.

Feel actually thinks he can show up in cowboy boots (maybe even borrow the hat) and play the, "What was I thinking; Man, that came out of left field?" card.

Am I the only one who thinks 75K is chump change for a former federal prosecutor? Or even Carlos?

Anonymous said...

KF….Reeves & Bryant may not be exchanging Christmas cards but make no mistake, they are both card carrying members of the political class that will protect each other….especially at the instructions of the Boss Hog.

Anonymous said...

The coverup is a go. This entire deal has been a deliberant attempt to hang one particular family out to dry from Day 1, and we’ve all taken the bait. Anna Wolfe and other media outlets just gobbled up what Shad and Co. fed them and we all still act like Shad’s audit report is accurate. Well, what if it’s not? The “independent” 3rd party auditors have already acknowledged Shad limited their access to certain files, certain emails, etc. Why?

Phil’s been exposed partly because of Anna Wolfe’s reporting and Anna wants her recognition. But make no mistake, Phil’s exposed because the folks he and Shad tried to hang this on have hung around to expose them all. Pigott being fired is pure coverup and the Republican Party is responsible. The game has begun and those individuals truly guilty of crimes are scared. And they should be.

Krusatyr said...

In the best interests of most Republicans, who are hard working, sincere and honest, this raw, arrogant, unexpurgated political grift, encouraged and lubricated by Phil Bryant, should be fully exposed and indicted immediately.

Anonymous said...

I get the Republicans trying to place a handpicked attorney over this thing, but what happens when the Defendants start filing counterclaims, joinders, etc. against Phil, Favre, Southern Miss, MDHS and yes the AG’s office (I get the immunity protections). Gonna be hard to keep the other Defendants from airing out the dirty laundry.

Anonymous said...

Burn them all Nancy. Burn them all.

Anonymous said...

Shad on Twitter this a.m.

“DHS has apparently fired Brad Pigott, the attorney they hired to get back the misspent welfare money that my office identified. Firing Pigott is a mistake. From the beginning of this case, I said having a bipartisan team look at this case is important. That’s one of the many reasons I gave our findings to the DA of Hinds Co, who’s a Democrat. I’ve also, of course, given everything to the FBI. Pigott worked well with my office, communicating regularly with us about the status of the case and how we could share information.
I hope Pigott’s firing doesn’t delay the recovery of the millions of misspent welfare money that we identified in our audits. I do not have the authority to prosecute or litigate my team’s cases, so having good attorneys represent the interests of the taxpayers is important. “

Anonymous said...

This makes no sense if this is political. You fire a former Democrat federal attorney with a current Democrat President with a Democrat congressman asking for a federal investigation (who happens to be the Chairman of Homeland Security and Chairman of the Jan 6 committee) and some say this is going to make the GOP look ok.It’s too obvious to be true that it’s a cover up that won’t get more attention. That would be like calling in an air strike on your location.If this is a plan by the GOP leadership we have some real problems. More bad national news in 4,3,2,1.

Anonymous said...

I think it's obvious Tater had him fired. Hopefully the feds will jump on this as it does all pertain to misuse of government funds. I'd love to see some major political leaders do a bit of prison...Farve too
Ask anyone about Farve's real character who's lived in Hattiesburg for thirty years, he's really not someone you want as a close friend

Cbalducc said...

Is this “suite crime” worse in the long run than street crime?

Anonymous said...

Kingfish: you are correct no love lost between Phil and Tater. But lots happened on tjis case after Tater became Governor. Lots of emails, conversations & actions taken by Tater and his crowd at USM & IHL. Brad Pigot was getting too
Close to uncovering lots of info, even that of current administration.

Anonymous said...

Might just be that the client discovered who was giving advance info (leaking, in other words) to Ms Wolfe.

Trial by PR - while sometimes successful, is generally frowned upon by associated attorneys - particularly when they had not agreed upon it as a strategy.

Anna might have just lost her source.

Anonymous said...

July 23, 2022 at 10:43 AM = Conjecture. No first hand knowledge.

Anonymous said...

People should know by now that if it has anything to do with politics and politicians it is crooked. Has been for many years, if not forever. We have let the news media take over. If the news media says it is a crime then no one has the right to object. If they try to object they will become one of the criminals. The news media does not allow any idea other than their own to even be mentioned. If the news media does not say it happened it didn't happen.

Just take a look at all things political we read and see on the news media. Absolutely no different ideas are allowed. We have fact checker to stop that kind of stuff. Add in a few grown men who play kids games for a living and maybe a few people who act like other people on tv and you have a group of people who have more power than any king has ever wished for.

Anonymous said...

Is a new volleyball court not the best use of welfare fund to date? Just asking

Anonymous said...

If I remember correctly, DHS is the same agency that limited the scope of the audit, which it commissioned, into the misuse of the welfare funds by its former-director, et. al.

Shouldn't some entity besides DHS be in charge of investigating DHS corruption?

I don't know what's really going on, but it sure looks like DHS to going to great lengths to make sure no one gets too close to Phil Bryant and Brett Favre.

Anonymous said...

this is very much akin to the ''saturday night massacre'' perpetrated by nixon in october 1973 during the watergate investigation

Anonymous said...

They found the leaker. Pigott is hard core Democrat. Bottom line.

Anonymous said...

Both Political and Sports figures seems to always be somewhat shady. Not accusing anyone of doing wrong. Come to think about it, I might be doing that, or not.

Anonymous said...

I’m with 11:34. Though I’m no volleyball fan. At least we have something to show for our welfare tax dollars.

Anonymous said...

I give my word to The State of Mississippi, the GOP, Phil, Brett, and whomever else is involved that if they will award me a $75,000 a year contract, I will personally investigate this until the river runs dry and turn all findings, or lack of evidence over to them. A full, inconclusive investigation might take years to complete, but (fro $75,00 a year, I would stick with it.

Anonymous said...

Actually, it’s not USMs fault nor Brett Favre’s fault that DHS didn’t follow through with the programming for underprivileged kids that USM agreed to host. I’m sure at this point USM would be happy to see DHS use the facility for such programming.

That’s not nearly as egregious as the neon LED banner ads that DHS was running at the Vaught a while back. I commented to my wife at the time how odd it was for DHS to be advertising at a football game. Kinda ticked me off. I guess all the schools got a little something.

Kingfish said...

Looking for it. Used to be able to get the contract on DFA website as you know. DFA changed it all for the worse. Can't get a copy now without a public records request unless they buried those things somewhere else on the website.

Anonymous said...

"This makes no sense if this is political. You fire a former Democrat federal attorney with a current Democrat President with a Democrat congressman asking for a federal investigation (who happens to be the Chairman of Homeland Security and Chairman of the Jan 6 committee) and some say this is going to make the GOP look ok.It’s too obvious to be true that it’s a cover up that won’t get more attention. That would be like calling in an air strike on your location.If this is a plan by the GOP leadership we have some real problems. More bad national news in 4,3,2,1."

This would make for a great national story. But, with all the cases stemming from the Trump administration, the January 6 committee, and the Wikileaks investigation; this mess with DHS is way off the radar for the Feds

The people that terminated Pigott know they have a cushion, because of the mess in DC.

Anonymous said...

I am not completely up to speed on all of the facts in this big scenario. But 11:33's comment was the first thing that came to mind.

Pigott is a politics first attorney. Politics above law. I can see him "leaking" info to influence the politics of a situation, because he believes the ends justifies the means.

Anonymous said...

So, let's see, he had a week left on his contract. He's informed the contract won't be renewed. He reflexively runs to the Democrat friendly media to shout 'I was fired, I was fired'. Yup, knowing Brad Pigott quite well it all makes sense.

Anonymous said...

@12:02- Do you really think the Feds aren’t already deep into this? Especially when the Democrats have a chance to make the state with all elected state Republicans look bad and they control the executive branch. Mark my word this is only going to get worse. This story will be on 60 Minutes and other shows. After all this is about Mississippi and we must keep our # 50 reputation.

Anonymous said...

"@12:02- Do you really think the Feds aren’t already deep into this? Especially when the Democrats have a chance to make the state with all elected state Republicans look bad and they control the executive branch. Mark my word this is only going to get worse. This story will be on 60 Minutes and other shows. After all this is about Mississippi and we must keep our # 50 reputation."

I truly believe the multiple Trump cases, issues with the Secret Service, the Wikileaks investigation, are eating up a lot of resources.

This is truly a serious issue. But I just have a hard time seeing it making National news and the MSGOP are very fortunate at how much of a cluster the Trump administration was. Because it's taking away the focus.

Anonymous said...

If Mississippi was a foreign country, the U.S. government would cut off all assistance because of the corrupt patronage network looting the funds.

Anonymous said...

Two things:

1) Shadrack White is a POS. Period.

2) Bran Piggot, Esq. may just turn whistleblower now, and God help Mississippi what he may know.

Anonymous said...

11:26 gets it.

I can’t imagine there’s not already a parallel federal investigation, but main Justice needs to step in, now.

Anonymous said...

"They found the leaker. Pigott is hard core Democrat. Bottom line."

So lack of transparency in government is now an honorable motive? I think this is about the subpoena to USM, period.

Anonymous said...

If you are looking for transparency, you should look through Pigott, historically speaking.

Anonymous said...

This thing has got a 60 Minutes segment written all over it.

1234 said...

". . .absolute power corrupts absolutely!"

Anonymous said...

All I can think about is Shad plastering people on the news for petty crimes and indictments that will never result in a conviction. Those things and how Shad handles this will determine his future which isn't as bright as he and his minions think it is.

Anonymous said...

Shad no longer has a future in higher public office. He has lost all credibility and he knows it.

Anonymous said...

Funny to think of how many of you chuds have been calling for this state government o take over Jackson and rescue it from corruption.

Anonymous said...

About the time a certain auditor realizes that he could be next under the bus...now listen to him ballin' and squallin'!



Ballin' And Squallin' Buck Griffin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8lbm2R_kiA

Anonymous said...

Also, what's an "SOl(c3) organization"? Is that some special Mississippi form of con-profit?

Anonymous said...



The minutes of the Board of Trustees of State Institutions of Higher Learning state that the Volleyball deal was reviewed and approved by the Attorney General's Office prior to Board Approval.

One question you might want to ask yourself KF:

Is there any reason a person (you) might want to actually verify this claim?

If the AG's Office did actually review and approve the deal that's one thing, if not, then that's a whole different spin on recent events.

After all, these TANF folks never thought they would have to explain of this.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like one of you should replace Brad. You know all of the facts without doing any discovery through litigation. Case closed!

Kingfish said...

9:46: All I said was it should have been included in the story. Are you saying it should not have been?

Anonymous said...

I have no doubt the feds will get to the bottom of this. The corrupt should be shaking in their boots, dresses and stadiums bc this type of greed is criminal and we Mississippians deserve better management of federal monies for our citizens!

Anonymous said...

This shitshow is on the front page of the NYT today.

Anonymous said...

All the detractors know how to do it better KF but not a one of these piss ants steps up to the challenge of operating their own publication.

Anonymous said...

@11:10 —thanks for making my prediction yesterday verified. @2:18 pm—It was obviously going to happen. And for those that will say who reads the NYT in Mississippi I say—the other news outlets .Then they run their stories. See how that works now.And then future businesses looking at moving to Mississippi reads the articles and moves to Florida. Remember the state flag fiasco. We couldn’t even get rid of that stupid old flag till outsiders threatened to cancel “foozball”.

Anonymous said...

This boils down to the fact that too many handouts are being given. Give the money back to the taxpayers and cut the fat. Way too many welfare recipients that should not qualify. THIS IS FUCKING STUPID.



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In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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