Thursday, July 4, 2019

Facebook Follies

Today's Facebook rant comes from Laurel.   A working man had a few things to say about the Sonic, yes Sonic, in Laurel:

Dear Teenagers/Parents of Teenagers that hang out at Sonic in Laurel:

I’m gonna keep this as clean and PG as possible. It’s freaking Tuesday night. It’s 9 damn 30 at night. There’s so little choices to grab a late night meal in Laurel. I’ve worked all day (google the term “job” for references) and just want a bite to eat before going home and going to bed. Find some damn where else to hang around. I know you’re proud of the new Chevy 1500 with 12” lift, light bar, marine speaker, roll bars, and custom exhaust, and super swampers your mommy and daddy just bought you for no other reason than the fact that you made it to the age of 16 without becoming an example of why Charles Darwin may have been right all along, but go to an empty pasture or something to try and get to second base with Becca and/or her cousin Tiffany. Hanging around a place of business playing “Old Town Road” followed by something by Lil Wayne on repeat loud enough that I can’t even order my damn footlong is making me understand The Purge movie series more and more. Not to mention I had to do three laps to even find somewhere to pull in for all the empty Costa Del Mar stickered pickups and cutesy first-middle-last initial stickered Maximas taking up parking spots and not even eating. I can’t wait till I’m in a nursing home and you’re taking care of me because I promise, every time I shit my self right after you get done giving me a bath, I’m going to remind you of this bullshit. That is all.

EDIT: It has also come to my attention, since this post went viral, that some parents have been making their own butt-hurt posts trying to justify what these CHILDREN are doing. This post was 80% post to get a laugh and 20% me being annoyed that kids are so inconsiderate of others and clueless as to how to conduct themselves with their newfound freedom away from home. But mommy and daddy taking to Facebook to take up for them is precisely the reason these kids are the little shits they are. Besides the fact that I’ve deleted about a dozen comments these kids have made for the simple fact that they were obviously texting on their cell phones instead of paying attention in English class. Hashtag your grammar sucks. Hey parents, put their participation trophies in the closet and teach them that life sometimes sucks, especially hard if you’re dumb.

Sounds like its time to brown bag it.  


Anonymous said...

Why is this man still eating at Sonic, better yet, why is this man still using Facebook? It's 2019.

Hermit King said...

Wait a second. Haven't Drive-in restaurants been the staple of teenage hangouts since the 1950's?

I'm only in my late 30's so the only drive-in joints I've ever known have been Bumpers and Sonic and I know a lot of boomers still like to do classic car night at those.

I guess this curmudgeon has completely forgotten what it is like to be a teen.

Anonymous said...

Stay off my lawn too!

Anonymous said...

These damn kids and their MTv

Anonymous said...

Who the hell uses Fakebook? Wallpapering for truly empty lives.

Anonymous said...

Should have sprung for the carousel weenie at Keith's Superstore and called it a night.

Anonymous said...

The sheriff's race in the free state of Jones County is where the action is. Incumbent Hollywood Hodge will have a tough time this go around. Citizens Against Corruption is mounting a charge against him. Sheriff Hollywood ,who never met a camera he didn't love, and the local newspaper, Laurel-Leader Call, continue with their pissing contest.

straight pipes said...

People who speak disparagingly of Facebook are the same ones who are on it day and night. Besides, the side mirrors on these kids' pickups won't near-bout fit between the speakers at Sonic.

Anonymous said...

I guess I’m just old fashioned I don’t mind teens being teens at sonic but their choice of music has gotten so vulgar I can’t take my kids around it. Doesn’t matter anyway I guess who is still feeding their kids junk for dinner in 2019?

Anonymous said...

I took the post as a rant on society more so than a post about where kids hang out. And I agree with the poster.

Anonymous said...

The dude is right on point. Kudos to him for calling out the illiterate, participation trophy wielding, spoiled brats, and their so-called parents!

Anonymous said...

I love this guy. Kids driving $70,000 trucks with inadequate mufflers and booming sound systems, seemingly for the sole purpose of announcing their presence, are a regular annoyance where I live. And I agree that parents demanding that their little darlings be treated like the center of the universe are part of the problem.

Anonymous said...

@3:08 Ditto. Couldn't be more true.

Anonymous said...

PDI's has way better milkshakes. Always try to get one when I go see family in Laurel. Haven't gotten a time to swing by the Scotsman and pick up a cold Frostie Root Beer from the freezer.

Rod Knox said...

Yes 3:08, DITTO. And 71 more payments and that truck will be paid for....... or in a salvage yard.

Anonymous said...

No mention of the trucks with half installed lift kits or pulling loaded invisible trailers? They call it the Carolina squat or some such.

Anonymous said...

Seems like the OP nailed it. OTOH, if Sonic or whoever wants nothing but non-paying "customers," I guess that's their business. It's too bad they don't seem to have competition in Laurel.

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Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

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Trollfest '07

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There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS