Wednesday, March 20, 2024

Truth or Fiction? We Report, You Decide

 How prophetic this old Ted DiBiase turned out to be.


7 comments:

Tweety said...

Well if you want to immortalize Ted's bad acting I have an original Million Dollar Man action figure still in original unopened package. Got it as gag gift in 80s and threw it in drawer to be recently found.

je etait Charles Martel said...




More like the million dollar asshole.

Anonymous said...

The poors are the way they are because they are either lazy, stupid, or both. Their ancestors were lazy and stupid so they didn’t build any generational wealth. This isn’t about race either. Plenty of generational wealth among all races. It takes brains and self control. Most poors lack self control and end up in debt.

Anonymous said...

That's 7:39 of time I will never get back.

Who was this cretin?

And who is "Jesse" who was commenting? Ventura? As an ex-Minnesotan I can guarantee you that he was a waste of oxygen too.

Anonymous said...

When our kids were in Jr. High, the rumor circulated across Clinton that Ted, who lived in Woodmore back then, gave out $5.00 bills to Trick-or-treaters the previous Halloween. Our kids begged for us to drive them across town to go to Ted's (The million-dollar man's) house. We did not, but the next day, half the kids in their class were sad that all they got was a smallish piece of candy, as Ted's wife tried to cope with hundreds of kids who did not live in Woodmore showing up at their house.

Another time, the wife and I were at the Movie theatre behind Northpark Mall to see some movie. The line was very long, and I noticed Ted in line a few folks in front of us. At that time, he was in his bad-boy personality in Pro-Wrasslin and I lost all faith in the sport when the "Meanest Man in Wrasslin" purchased tickets to take his wife and kids to see "The Littlest Mermaid"

Back in those days, I was flying for business a lot. Many times, Ted and I got on a Delta flight leaving Jackson early in the morning. Some times I would ask his where he was wrestling that day. Got to where he would see me and say something like "On the road again?" He seemed like a nice guy.

Anonymous said...



Nice guys get arrested for theft and fraud sometimes.

Nice guys turn out to be wife beaters and chimos sometimes.

Sometimes the nice guys go to prison.

FAFO.

Todd Mardis.

Anonymous said...

I grew up in Clinton. I worked at a mechanic shop near where he lived. He had a early 80's F-150 that was a standard shift (on the column). He bought it for his son I think. He brought it in and I figured out it needed several parts on the column for the shift mechanism. It was going to be around $75 worth of parts and same on labor. It would hang up between gears from time to time and you would have to raise the hood and shift it back to netural to get going again. A common problem with these shifters. He told the boss he would keep getting out and clearing it from time to time before he would spend $150. He came and picked it up. We had a bill for $20 for checking it out and gettting a parts list togther and such. I was making $10 and hour cash then (I was 18). He refused to pay and the boss let him take it. I had an hour tied up in it.
I know his whole show was just that but he lived in a $250k house (1987) and stuck me with nothing. At least we laughed about him for a while so it was worth $10. His kid getting hammered was also good karma.


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Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


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Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

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