Sunday, January 12, 2020

Friday Night Fights

Just another Friday night at the McDonald's on Woodrow Wilson.


TheClintonscantsuicideusall said...

Like I've been saying, the women in the Jackson/Canton area love having their assess wupped.

Anonymous said...

Can't ever see your videos on Mozilla Firefox.

Anonymous said...

Makes no sense. Poor video, cuts heads off, man approaches car, opens door, punches somebody, car drives off. End of meaningless story. I don't see any Jackson/Canton women. WTF?

Anonymous said...

Thug Life.


Anonymous said...

The fact that bystanders are more content to film such stupidity says volumes about our society.

Anonymous said...

@2:24 - get a decent browser.

Anonymous said...

Where are the Lubumba siblings and the Credible Massager program with the violence intervention? Oh yea. It won’t be rolled out until mid-spring. They need more time past the 11 months they have expended already to ask more community experts how to avoid stray bullets.

Anonymous said...

Where the heck is a credible messenger when you need one?

Anonymous said...

The person who filmed it IS the credible messenger. He delivered it to you didn’t he? Just a perception of crime. And we wonder how this town will ever straighten itself up. Not by the hands of the current leaders.

Anonymous said...

I have spoken with the Credible Messenger, and he told me this city is beyond repair. He told me there are no longer enough people in this city who recognize what's necessary to make a difference. He said it's sort of like an alcoholic: the first step to recovery is admitting there's a problem, and the majority of people who live in this city don't see their normal way of life as a problem.

I agree with "him:" I'm pretty sure the tipping point has been passed. Things are just too weighted against a favorable outcome. When you have administration after administration who speak in platitudes, meant only to dazzle their constituency, yet have no realistic plan to solve a VERY SERIOUS problem, it's really difficult to be optimistic. The only solution I've been able to come up with, personally, is to keep as much distance as I can between my family and the Jackson city limits.......and that's only a stop-gap.

Asshurtin said...


I have Fireball, I mean Firefox and it wurks fine

Anonymous said...

If you live in NorthEast Jackson and don’t realize that you live in a DMZ, there is exhibit A. While the shift is slow and not obvious to some, that element displayed in the above video moves closer and closer every day. The real question is: why do we stay in Jackson?

Cynical Sam said...

ATTENTION JACKTOWN CREDIBLE MESSENGERS: Put you damn phone in the horizontal position for videos!!!!!

This has been a public service annoucement for JPS alumni.

Anonymous said...

Can you get fries with that?

Cynical Sam said...

For those Jacksonians desiring to move to Madison County, please check-in with Madison Immigration Authority on E. County Line Road. Once you check-in a background investigation will take place on you and all family members.

Thank is all.

Cynical Sam said...

The latest murder happened in the street on Colonial Circle last night. It may be only a perception of crime, but it's probably a good idea to apply for Madison Co. residency before the rush. If you don't meet our qualifications you could always move to Rankin County, as they will take just about anyone.

Anonymous said...

Again, the failure of our educational system to teach the best practices of cell phone videography. Failure of the educational system at it's finest.

Anonymous said...

Considering the close proximity not doubt Mayor Gum Flap is glad he and his are ensconced on a private gated street.

Anonymous said...

1. Taking a certain amount of illegal narcotics.
2. Fighting with a man and getting hung up in his door.

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).

Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.

In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS