Former Congressman Mike Espy, Esq. issued the following statement.
Friday, April 6, 2018
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
40 comments:
Slow news day........ yawn.......
I like Mike! Especially against CHS and Chrissy.
He will make a great Senator and represent this redneck, ass backerds, regressive state well.
He'll jackboot in lock step with the Democrats on every important vote. No thanks.
Unless and until a rock-ribbed conservative with core principles jumps into the race who also won't be an embarrassment to this state like McDaniel, I'm sitting this one out (so I guess that's a vote for Espy).
So no one is going after Wicker?
Here's how this will play out in the NYT and other MSM quarters:
Espy wins, and it's proof that Trump's racism is too much even for those racists in Mississippi.
Espy loses, and it's because Mississippi is full of racists and Trump's racism resonates there.
So no matter what, Mississippi is a bunch of racists and it's all Trump's fault.
I'M WITH ESPY!!!!!!!!
There was a crooked man, and he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence against a crooked stile;
He bought a crooked cat which caught a crooked mouse,
And they all lived together in a little crooked house.
2:03 your assessment is probably correct, but this lifelong Republican (except for Mac) is voting for Espy because I am sick and tired of politicians bragging about how "conservative" they are and keeping their heads 10 feet underground, while states around us prosper. Hood too...can't wait to put a huge sign in my yard at the Jackson Country Club. Tate is a disaster.
Maybe Bill Clinton will come down and campaign for him. He owes him one after that nonsense he went through in the 90's. $30 million special counsel investigation, 5 or 6 years of investigations and Espy presented 0 witnesses and evidence and was acquitted.
ALL these candidates really suck.
But Espy may be the worst.
Friday... where news stories go to disappear.. **yawn**
“ First, we kill all the lawyers....” - Will S.
3:09 - yes. Be a public servant. Take gifts from regulated entities - travel, girlfriend scholarships, tickets, and no telling whatever else - but get a nice jury of one's peers in the District of Columbia and you can come out without a conviction. But - those that gave the gifts all had to go to jail. Sounds like several of those folks that were around the Clinton's in the 90's.
Did Cindy Hyde-Smith vote for Obama in 2008?
I will support Espy. I would have considered Andy Taggart if he had decided to run. Cindy Hyde-Smith is trying to run to the right of Chris McDaniel and is showing signs she will be a terrible Senator already.
Let’s hit the refresh button and consider the smartest, youngest and most ethical person in the race — Tupelo Mayor Jason Shelton!!
Espy is the most qualified. Our family will be supporting Espy.
4:19 - Don't know. She did vote in the Democrat primary. Just as Chris McDaniel voted in the Democrat primary in 2003. Kinda strange that he attacks her for it when he is 'guilty' of the same thing.
Well, actually for him, its not strange at all. McDaniel seems to think that whatever he does is ok, and anything other folks do is terrible.
Espy is a jive-ass clown. A shill for Clinton. A racist too.
This is a sad race, that’s for sure.
Espy proved his like for the swamp years ago. No way.
7:34. That is why this blog exists. It gives totally stupid, racist people like you to opine. Mike is not remotely a racist, jive-ass clown. You are clearly, respectfully, a redneck however.
Will there be any free "gifts" involved?
I worked with Mike on a 20 million dollar deal and his ability to think outside the box helped solve the entire issue.
He works tirelessly and has actual working knowledge of issues impacting this state: agriculture.
He’s qualified for the job and I hope he wins the race.
He thinks outside the box alrighty.
He lined up with Rudy and enriched himself while helping Warnock negotiate a legal pathway to millionaire status.
He thought he had lined up another path to richness with Rudy before Canton Municipal Utilities kicked them both to the curb.
He managed to get in cahoots with the latter-day developers of Lost Rabbit and got deep into their pockets before they wised up.
He promised us all he would travel to D.C. at his own expense and get permission from the Interior Department to have an off and on ramp on The Natchez Trace at Lost Rabbit. Another plan that went to shit and disappeared.
Has this man ever been associated with a productive, honest, above-board, ethical scheme or period of employment? If so, please name it or them.
Then there's the "I'm With Mike" crowd...
Espy's essay, "Why I'm Running for Senator," tl; dr. Heard and read it all before anyway.
Most folks vote color first.
About 10 percent of Whites -- lefties, SWPLs, and Old Guard civil rights "reach across the aisle" types, can always be counted to go against that grain.
So if that tendency holds, the result will be Espy, 46; whoever the Republican is, 52; Others, 2.
9:34 am
You literally know nothing.
I was there and he helped save my client millions and he did not enrich anyone.
Did people who risked millions make money? Yes.
Was it illegal or improper? No.
You can troll all you wish.....I saw what happened and wrote the checks.
He’s a man of integrity and most importantly - knowledge.
I wish you the best.
There wont be any "others" to add up to 2%. The runoff will be between Espy and one other person. This is a special election so no indies on the ballot.
If everybody in Congress had the integrity and ability to listen like Mike does, we would not be in the mess we are in now. Moron at 10:42, I am one of your "10%". There will be a lot more. Read it and weep. The Republican Party, of which I "was" a proud member, has once again been taken over by the right wing nuts.
5:49, no it has not been 'taken over' by those nuts. They try to claim their control; the demean and call names anyone who doesn't agree with them; and they put up right-wing nutjobs as the best possible the candidate that everybody should kneel down to and worship. But, they haven't taken control - they wish they could, but they are still in the minority. And if all goes well, they will stay that way and die a swift, and silent, death.
7:56. It won't be swift nor silent. There is a reason we are last. THEM. And they have "talked to God" and don't give a shit.
It's frankly impossible for you people to defend the actions, associations, chicanery, clandestine maneuverings and account rifling Espy has engaged in by claiming he's a swell guy, dresses nicely and speaks in a soft voice. Nice try, but meaningless.
And calling someone a troll and telling them they 'know nothing' but ending it with 'wish you the best' brings belly laughter.
I was with Mike until I learned RSS is one of his biggest supporters—-that is your sign....
I was with Mike until I learned RSS is one of his biggest supporters—-that is your sign....
LOL - You boys at 3:52, 5:49 and 7:56 have really gotten your panties caught in your cracks! I'm laying odds all three of you (if you're not the same person) are exactly what Soros and his gang look for when it comes to protests, marches and vagina hatters. Meanwhile, enjoy Starkbucks and dream on.
3:52 says of Espy: "He’s a man of integrity and most importantly - knowledge."
Did you intend to give examples and did you know they'd all be shot down? But, hold on...I'll grant you 'he's a man of knowledge' - He knows how to crack more safes than everybody who ever appeared on Gunsmoke, combined.
Watch for Warnock's contributions, unless he, as usual, can disguise them.
If we really want to see a resurrection of all the collective nightmares that have hung over Canton/Madison County over the past ten years, Espy is our man. He knows where enough bodies are buried and has the combination to enough lock boxes to be a real heavy-hitter in D.C.
Espy single-handedly guided Rudy Warnock, Banks, Griffin and two lesser players through the legal maize that resulted in all of them being personally enriched over a period of years and several four year terms. And of course he got his cut. After Rudy started suing everybody, even the county, we still had Espy providing legal guidance on how to continue raiding the county strong-box.
What's out there that he's touched that doesn't smell?
April 9, 2018 at 11:16 AMAnonymous said...
"If we really want to see a resurrection of all the collective nightmares that have hung over Canton/Madison County over the past ten years, Espy is our man. He knows where enough bodies are buried and has the combination to enough lock boxes to be a real heavy-hitter in D.C.
Espy single-handedly guided Rudy Warnock, Banks, Griffin and two lesser players through the legal maize that resulted in all of them being personally enriched over a period of years and several four year terms. And of course he got his cut. After Rudy started suing everybody, even the county, we still had Espy providing legal guidance on how to continue raiding the county strong-box.
What's out there that he's touched that doesn't smell?"
MICKENS SAYS: So when Espy "single handedly handles millions of dollars it smells bad.
But when Butler Snow unleashes its army of attorneys to handle hundreds of millions it smell OK?
Just askin?
Lawyers do what lawyers do!
Don't hate the player, hate (and change?) the game?
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