Friday, October 9, 2026

Flashback Friday: How To Land a Man

Can't get a good man? The Clarion-Ledger offered great advice on how to do so back in 1940.  




9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Modern women prefer bad boys. Good boys are boring

Anonymous said...

I've seen some women struggle with things that a good corset could assist with...

Anonymous said...

KF subscribed to the CL IN 1940?

Anonymous said...

Gee!

Anonymous said...

Because feminazi heads need something to heat them up on a crisp, cool Mississippi morning.

Anonymous said...

I hear ol’ Plain Priscilla was fancy when the lights went down.

Anonymous said...

...and I thought that the 'Husband as SLAVE' concept came about AFTER World War II. Apparently, not.

This L'il-Abner-Style ad salad was was whipped-up well in advance of our entry into World War Two. Was there already hysteria about CATCHING a man, before they were all drafted and then shipped-off?

I know two classic Norman English families in the Delta, who incurred irreparable damage, because several daughters married whatever men they could get (that hysteria, to marry "ANYTHING!"). The marrying-in men, had grating names, grating accents, crude families, and biometrics which did not meld well with Norman ones. Their children needed braces. The children were not as brilliant as one would expect. And nobody could stand to be around anyone else, because the marrying-in men were so crude and crazy and prone to losing money. Every one of those marrying-out daughters, spent the rest of her life, toiling to compensate for her husband's fecklessness - worrying, nonstop, about money.

But about 'Husband as Slave'... Most Americans, in '40, were descended from Indentured Servants - people displaced by England's 'Clearances' - or snatched off Great Britain's streets, and outright-sold into indentured servitude (with the assumption that they would be worked-to-death in the colonies). So, generations later, the idea of luring a man into an inescapable arrangement which would end with his perishing of exertion (Life Insurance, girls!!!), had certain precedents.

And then there were those 'Throw Your Life Away Movies' - conditioning girls to "fall in love!", and marry the broke nebbish who barely notices you, rather than the rich kombinator who worships you. (Dietrich, in 'Morocco', and Kim Novak in 'Picnic', being particularly stupid examples)

But this was the Jackson of 1940 - a town, like Greenville, which was more all-American than Southern. But while Greenville had its populace groomed & selected by its founding fathers (White Trash being especially unwelcome), Jackson was where you ended-up, when you had noplace else to go. The 'Queens' neighborhood - naturally integrated - prospering blacks and whites, side-by-side, working their way out of the Great Depression (still ongoing, in '40), being a good example of Jackson's spirit.

I find the blondness portrayed in this ad-sheet, to be perplexing. In a city so mixed, why are those cartoon people so blond? Was there some national source for the illustrations? Somewhere on the Great Lakes, maybe? Or did the Carpetbaggers running Jackson and its media, have their preferences? Or did blond heads simply require less ink?

Too, considering what L'il Abner was USED FOR (softcore purposes - I stumbled upon old Abner cartoons, in researching the word, 'Grandmammy', during Barbie Basset's persecutions - and those cartoons stopped just-short of showing Abner's and Daisy's bits), wouldn't girls be ASHAMED to be caught thinking Daisymae thoughts?

Anonymous said...

Most every nice guy I know (who has money) is married to a woman who loves to bitch. I was one until my wife died. I'm rich, in great physical shape, a nice guy and I hope to never marry again. I'm done being bitched at. When I kick around the idea of dating, my buddies give me the "are you nuts?" look.
If women would be nice and follow the ad then they and their husbands would be happier.

Anonymous said...

What's with HVAC companies' TV ads in the Jackson market, showing scary-bitchy women being mean to males? One had a scary-looking, Kathy-Hochul-lookalike "mom" with wicked witch arched eyebrows- flanked by glowering meth addicts, intimidating a clean-cut and polite boy (the kind a normal mom prays WILL date her daughter) into leaving her home. Following that, one presumes the boy never returns, and probably switches teams.

Another shows a goodlooking giant of a man, with a short, angry, red-faced wife, livid because he called the wrong AC repair service.

I wouldn't want adolescents in my charge viewing commercials like that - especially the boys.


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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


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Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

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