And there arose to the north of Eden a tribe called the Hotty-Toddys, who were also called metros. And the Hotty-Toddys were very displeasing; they didst place centerpieces on their banquet tables, and didst exalt themselves much. And they didst glorify the southern kingdom of the past.
And for a brief time they didst enjoy success on the battlefield. But in
the second year of the reign of John son of Joseph, a man named James,
of the house of Meredith, of the nation of Cush, didst attempt to enter
the seminary at Oxford. But the Hotty-Toddys despised and oppressed the
Cush-ites, and refused him entry. But the Judges decreed that James must
be allowed to enter. And the Hotty-Toddys rose up with great vengeance
and furious anger, and didst burn their own city, and even slew two
aliens in their midst. And the LORD saw that it was no good, and was
much angered, and uttered a curse upon the Hotty-Toddys:
"THOU SHALT TASTE VICTORY ONCE MORE, THEN NEVER AGAIN SHALL THOU BE FIRST AMONG THY BRETHREN"
And after the following harvest, they didst enjoy their last great
victory, then their warriors became lost in the wilderness. And a man
named Elisha, who was also called Archie, didst attempt to lead them
back to glory, but was wounded in the land of Eden and tasted not the
fruits of victory. Then a great famine fell upon Oxford, until Eli son
of Archie arrived upon a white horse. Eli led the Hotty-Toddys to many
small victories, and girded his loins against an invasion by the
warriors from Eden.
But Eli fell backwards*. And a great roar arose, and Johnny of the house
of Vaught, the great king of the Hotty-Toddy past, didst ask "What be
the meaning of this tumult?" For Johnny was a very old man, 93, and
nearly blind. And the Hotty-Toddys cried in despair, "The invaders from
Eden hath carried off the West championship! Our curse is still upon us,
and the Heisman shall never come to the house of Manning."
And the LORD then caused a great delusion to fall upon the tribe of
Hotty-Toddy, and they drove their general David from their midst, even
though David had led them to victories for the first time in forty
years. And they chose a recruiter of warriors from a western land, Bay
Bay of the house of Yawyawyawyaw, because their delusion kept them from
seeing he was a fool. And Bay Bay disdt tear his garments, and shout
words none could understand. And the LORD loosed against the
Hotty-Toddys bands of Cowboys, and Bulldogs, and even Commodores, who
laid waste to Oxford. And the Hotty-Toddys continued to exalt Bay Bay,
even as half his warriors disappeared from Oxford, and rued the days of
Cutcliffe. And finally Les of Eden came to Oxford and destroyed it once
and for all. 1 Samuel 4:3.
Then there arose a false prophet from the House of Nutt. Although he was
cast out by swine, the faithful's hope was restored as he trampled the
Tiger, vanquished the Raiders of Red, and slew the Cowboy in the House
of Jerry. There was much feasting as milk and honey flowed from the
rivers of the Delta to the lands of Elvis. However, more sorrow smote
the tribe as the prophet's promises proved false when the curse struck
him with a madness that left him speechless and confused. The prophet
wandered at times on sidelines alone, quiet at times, babbling at
others, while the faithful said oh no, we've been cursed yet again.
However, Les of Eden was not without mercy as he was indeed a just man
and knelt to end the game. 1 Samuel 4:4.
However, Les suffered the same fate as King Saul by showing mercy to the
enemy. The Lord shewed his wrath and withdrew his favor from Les of
Eden. Les and his Edenites came back to the land of the Hotty-Toddys,
boastful of their strength. The Hotty-Toddy's drank the blood of many
sacrifices to their false idols in their pagan temple called "The Grove"
as they worked themselves into a frenzy. The Edenites fell into a trap
as their exalted general Zachariah slept while the Hotty's caught them
unawares. When Zachariah finally awoke, he slew many Hotty's but alas
he fell in the end. The Hotty's made more sacrifices to their false
idols as they feverishly danced naked after they vanquished Les of
Eden.
However, the Hotty-Toddy's grew lazy as they lived off the fat of the
land and drank much wine. They returned to the Valley of Death led by a
young king named Beaux, III. He danced naked before the enemy, pointed
three fingers at the heavens, ignored the counsel of his lord, and
died in the Valley of Death. The Hotty-Toddy's were held to much scorn
as their pride went down along with their downfall.
A mighty warrior, Jayden of the House of Daniels, made war upon the Hotty-Toddy's later. He slew many Hotty-Toddys as the faithful gnashed their teeth while women rent their garments. The cries turned to joy as he ran into a mighty wall of Hotty-Toddys and suffered defeat.
Relief turned to mourning as the Hotty-Toddys returned to the Valley of Death. They were led by Lane of the House of Kiffin. The Hotty-Toddys expected much glory and Lane to take a crown but such was not to be. The boastful Lane gambled mightily but fell short on the fourth of down. The Hotty-Toddys fought mightily but betrayed by pride, they fell on the field as Saint Nuss slew many a Rebel. While the Bulldog and Longhorn soared in winter, the Hotty-Toddys festered in the Grove, wailing their fate.
Prediction: The series has been a war for the last 25 years as shown in the records below. LSU has a great defense this year and as usual, Kiffin has a high-powered offense. However, the Tiger defense will probably give Ole Miss fits. So switching over to the other side of the ball is where Ole Miss probably gets an advantage. LSU has probable first-round draft pick Garrett Nussmeir at qb and some pretty damn good receivers. Unfortunately, LSU can not run the ball even against teams such as Louisiana Tech and Southeastern. The problem is the O-Line can not run block to save its life just as it could run-block in 2024 when it had two NFL first-rounders at tackle and two other linemen drafted. The O-Line had the same problem in 2023 as well. Simply put, Coach Brad Davis sucks at coaching run-blocking. Kelly recently had him work them more on blocking out of a three-point stance. If the center goes down, watch out. That happened in the Tech game and Nuss was punished all night by rushes up the middle.
What does it all mean? It means Ole Miss has a good chance of stopping the run and forcing Nuss to make play after play. It would also help Ole Miss if Kiffin doesn't screw around when he has opportunities to score.
The spread is probably accurate. Ole Miss by 2.
2001: Ole Miss win.
2002: LSU by 1.
2003: LSU by 3
2004: LSU by 3 despite a record-setting rushing performance by Broussard.
2005: LSU blowout because Ole Miss quits on Orgeron.
2006: LSU in OT
2007: LSU comes back in fourth quarter
2008: Ole Miss ass-kicking
2009: Les Miles can't tell time.
2010: LSU wins at the end of the game.
2011: The knee game.
2012: LSU needs 4th quarter comeback to win game.
2013: Ole Miss wins by 3.
2014: LSU upsets Ole Miss 10-7.
2015: Ole Miss won 38-17
2016: LSU won 38-21
2017: LSU won 40-24
2018: LSU won 45-18
2019: LSU won 58-37
2020: LSU won 53-48
2021: Ole Miss won 31-17
2022: LSU won 45-20
2023: Ole Miss won 55-49
2024: LSU won in overtime
15 comments:
Since this is early-season and nothing of import is on the line, I love OM's chances of winning. However, if this game were in late October/November, I would pick the Tigers. This game is just big enough for Kiffin to get the dub, but not too big for him to shit the bed. Rebs win by a final of 42-38
the fish plays this every fall , much like the FM rock stations play the old cheech n chong skit called ''santa clause'' every december.
the cheech and chong skit is much more funny.
Never stop posting this KF. I'm sure the "sports ball" idiot will post shortly, but I love this.
For a number of years from 1956 to 1979, this was the most unknown, great rivalries in college football.
Ole Miss will win by 10. If it were in Baton Rouge I'd call it a tossup, but they won't lose in Oxford.
Tigerbait!!
LSU D dominates Trinidad 27-10
"the fish plays this every fall"
Yeah ... and it was funny as hell many years ago.
But not anymore.
In 2025 it makes no sense .
Today's kids have no understanding about KF's humor
or the history of the Ole Miss/LSU games.
I only wish this game was still played on Halloween night.
Fish, you know I love this stuff. It is great, and I think it is still funny. I really think this game is very close, but my Rebs pull out the win by 8. Our defense steps up enough to give our offense the ball enough to score a lot. I guess we can check Sat night. #HottyToddy
to 7;24 ...........todays kids have no understanding about KFs humor cause they been filled full of woke ass BS their entire lives.
as for history , they dont know the history of anything past last tuesday.
The Midnight Ride of Billy Cannon on Halloween 1959 is still the most exciting play in SEC history! What a night!
Since coaches and players are a revolving door and coaches paid 10's of millions of dollars , and since it's impossible for me to think of Oklahoma and Missouri as other than Midwestern States, I'm having some "historical" issues as well "prediction" problems. I don't know how you keep a sense of rivalry among these young players anymore. They don't play to get a free ride through college and a college education anymore. The players are less rooted in "pride of place". The teams don't get 4 years of learning about how each other thinks when they are on the field. Already a player only has to be 20 to go pro. They are "marks" for every scammer who wants their money. Many more will be washed up broke by 30.
"However, the Hotty-Toddy's grew lazy as they lived off the fat of the land and drank much wine."
I re(pre)sent that remark! HYDR
The real question is, "Did the CEO of longtime industry rivals LSU Pneumatic Device Control or Ole Miss Pneumatic Device Control, along with the departments of human resources for each company, make the better hiring decisions?"
And for the naive who still think this is "college football," the question can be more-gently phrased as, "Will the professionals currently wearing LSU jerseys or Ole Miss jerseys score more points?"
Ole Miss by 6.
Right now the game is relevant. Come late October they will both be little brother.
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