Wednesday, August 10, 2022

Recalled to Life

The property where the old Meadowbrook McRae's stands may get a new lease on life.  Dale Partners Architects announced a new mixed-use development will replace the abandoned department store.  The firm announced on Facebook: 

We are excited to announce Fondren’s newest high-end Lofts offering: 𝙋𝙧𝙖𝙙𝙀 𝙇𝙀𝙛𝙩𝙨 𝙖𝙩 π™ˆπ™šπ™–π™™π™€π™¬π™—π™§π™€π™€π™ . This project will feature 215 living units, multiple clubhouses, a swimming pool with cabanas, dog wash facilities & walking trail, & multiple study lounges to cater to Jackson’s growing professional, medical & college communities.





85 comments:

Anonymous said...

One hunnert dollars this never happens. This spiraling economy and the crime in Jackson, it'll never take shape. It looks and feels good on paper. A walking trail? There? Hahahaha...yeah right.

Anonymous said...

Does it come with a electric fence and barbwire around the perimeter? Full time security? What about auto damage or theft insurance?

Anonymous said...

Guarantee the City drops the ball and doesn't repair Eubanks like it did when the data center was supposed to be built in that location.

Anonymous said...

Wow, great addition to SoDoSoPa. The Lofts at Kenny's House finally has some serious competition.

Anonymous said...

LMAO. Keep bailing. Be prepared to hire a small army. You think JPD is going to be able to stop the looting of that construction site? Is Highland Village management consulting on this project? ROFLMAO

Anonymous said...

That part of town looks worse than Afghanistan.

Anonymous said...

I'll pass, but have to know, will HUD be paying the rent?

Anonymous said...

If this happens it will be an absolute miracle. If it looks like that an absolute shocker

Anonymous said...

I think they will start construction right after they begin "Madison at Main."

Anonymous said...

I hope this project is a success. If it is, additional development in that area will follow.

Anonymous said...

People that could afford to pay what the rent will be would definitely not live in that area!

Anonymous said...

The hate for Jackson is so sad.

Anonymous said...

SoDoSoPa buildings are always square and bland like those communist Khru-Slums. But at least they’re trying to do something nice for the Meadowhood area. When are they gonna build moar Whole Foods, Trader Joe’s, and Urban Outfitters we also need moar strip clubs to be on par with Poleland, OR.

Prado Lofts At Meadowbrook= PraLoMeBro? Or just PraLo?

Anonymous said...

The hate for Jackson is sad.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if the development will have its own water well.

Look, it's great if it actually happens. But in reality a development like that will only cater to the wealthy virtue signalers that want to prove how un-racist and progressive they are by living in Jackson. That will only last until their first mugging or carjacking.

The commute from the out-of-Jackson areas is only 10-15 minutes. NO ONE IS RIDING THEIR BICYCLE THROUGH JACKSON. We have no public transportation. So how does a high-end apartment complex compete with buying a home away from town?

Anonymous said...

6 months to Section 8

Anonymous said...

They gonna air drop potable water? Wonder how pretty the porta johns will be.

Anonymous said...

will gun towers be erected on top?

Anonymous said...

Maybe by the time construction starts in a couple of years, Jackson will be able to provide enough water to build this.

Anonymous said...

Will the gun towers use the same design? Where will the homeless sleep? Will there be shelters for the panhandlers? 24/7 armed security during construction?

Anonymous said...

Grown men making cartoon references is just as bad as grown men letting their trousers sag below their underwear.

Grow up. You are all shameful man-children.

Anonymous said...

I get that there are no stakes for coming on here and saying stupid shit just to be negative about Jackson but the ocean of ignorance in these comments is staggering. This project is extremely likely to happen successfully. When it does, you will just explain it away as an outlier and keep spouting your venom. Jackson will be a little nicer and you'll still be miserable losers who don't know anything about real estate. Enjoy!

Anonymous said...

Maybe this will take some of the pressure off The Fondren and The Belhaven as far as carjacking, right?

Anonymous said...

HUD subsidized in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...

Anonymous said...

HATE for Jackson? Please, open your eyes.

Anonymous said...

How much is the Chowke administration going to subsidize this project, with the customary "commission," right?

Anonymous said...

The Fondren resident won't have to go far to purchase their weed and crack.

Anonymous said...

$1900 a month for a likely 1 bedroom apartment in this area? I don't think so.

Anonymous said...

LMFAO....No one will want to BUY much less rent there....This looks like am imvestor specail....Investors put up the money while everyone else spends and steals it.

Anonymous said...

This is a good attempt to take an abandoned eye sore and try and improve the area. Maybe it extends Fondren out further? Maybe it will help develop/improve some of the surrounding area? Anybody against this is just hating and has an agenda. I don't understand why the surrounding suburbs wants Jackson to fail? If Jackson succeeds everybody else's property value will increase too! We need a prosperous capital city for the state.

Anonymous said...

Why pay $1900/month to rent in Jackson when you can buy a 4/3 home with reliable public utilities for less?

Anonymous said...

@10:15 AM "...wants Jackson to fail?" Wake up and smell the roses. That ship sailed years ago.

Anonymous said...

In keeping with Da Mayor's Dignity Economy, make sure the 2 bums that were sleeping in front of the BYB at UMMC get first dibs on a unit. Or at least leave a couple of benches out front with bottled water for them.

The Truth Hurts said...

@10:13 AM is right on the money, so to speak. They will oversell this concept to investors who will take it in the shorts.

It is years too early for a project like this in Jackistan. This project would require its own well/treatment plant to survive, and that's not going to happen. It will be a great source for raw boo boo in the streets.

Anonymous said...

It definitely looks like a nice project, and Jackson certainly needs projects like this to improve the city, but Jacksonians have proven time and time again that they "can't have nice things."

The true test is if this can be built entirely with private dollars and not a dime of public money (including tax credits, etc.). There is capital on the sidelines looking for a place to go. If private money says "no go," this is going to fail in the end.

Anonymous said...

Ok, let's be positive and say it does get built and gets the ball rolling on some other nice developments in the area. Say it starts driving the price of rent/real estate up. Don't laugh, we are being Jackson Positive. Increasing cool and fun stuff to do and places to live is the name of the development game. So say in 5-10 years people are actually wanting to live down there and it's the new Austin, Massachusetts(there is a joke there). How long until the people of Jackson are screaming "the white people made it too expensive to live here" or yelling about gentrification?

Stuff About ZeroBear PolyBear said...

Hoping you closely follow the development on this project. Now that there are no opportunities to invest in the metrocnter development with amusement part and go-cart track, I may want to become involved in this opportunity.

Anonymous said...

I will in Fondren and this project is exciting, as I wouldn't have to drive far to get my weed, and maybe crack if available.

Anonymous said...

Good grief!
It won't be HUD ever( see HUD regulations).

It backs us to residential houses ( the east side N. State.

Some of you have either been gone from Jackson so long it's obvious or else you never lived here.
Nor do you understand that the apartment market for students not just at UMMC but also at Belhaven and Millsaps is high.
Really people,you are a large part of why Trump lost. The GOP is looking like the party of the uneducated and insane and criminal elements.
If you are on the same political page with the Nazis and Aryan Nation and Proud Boys and Marjorie Taylor Greene, you might as well scream that you are a fascist or racist.
More bizarre is that you are the ones trying to claim being "real Christains".
I don't claim to be virtuous but at least I try to have some consistent moral code based on Christianity.
Unlike you, I think Jesus' words are the most consistent guide and laid it out pretty well in His Sermon on the Mount.

Anonymous said...

@10:08
Fondren resident here. We just buy legal THC products from our CBD dispensary. You may not realize it, but you also have CBD dispensaries selling legal THC products in Rankin and Madison too. The 2018 Hemp Farm Bill allows all THC products made from hemp, except Delta-9 THC. Turns out Delta-8 and Delta-10 are legal and just as good. The legal THC edibles and legal THC vapes are really neat! Interacting with ghetto thugs to buy illegal drugs is so 2008.

Anonymous said...

10:13, you are especially special in your Commander style comment. The "investor"(they aren't soliciting redneck penny anny angels) is an internationally wealthy family, from a far more dangerous shithole than Jackson, and has a track record of success. You might have to swallow your dip spit when you see it come together. On the bright side, don't hate--maybe you'll get the landscaping contract. Or pool cleaning, ect.

Anonymous said...

Hope it comes with its own water well and land fill.

Anonymous said...

What's the current rate for palm greasing to get this approved? How much for the building inspectors?

Anonymous said...

Unless it will have secure indoor/underground parking it will be a carjacking magnet.

Anonymous said...

Fond memories of the McRaes store there back in the 70's. They were THE go to place for Cliff Notes so I wouldn't have to read a stupid book in my JPS education.

Anonymous said...

I am dubious but I sincerely hope a miracle happens and this development thrives.

And I don't know anyone in the burbs that WANTS Jackson to fail. I don't know anyone that cares or expects anything other than the current status quo, honestly.

I do know many that wish y'all would curtail the crime, fix the streets, and provide water so that we could comfortably visit and contribute to your tax coffers.

But none of us wish to risk our safety to contribute funds to the corrupt and inept leaders you guys select and tolerate.

If more Jxn residents would direct that misplaced suburb vitriol toward the abysmal failed leaders you have, YOU could affect the change that you seem to think the rest of the state owes you.

But keep hating Tater, Madison and Rankin instead of Chuckles.
Its working out real well.

Wow said...

Love reading all the skepticism from the suburban peasantry. It's definitely warranted.

Pretty awesome to see the turnaround Fondren has had since 2004 when the hipsters starting doing concerts there at the old Capri porn theatre.

We will see if this project happens and is successful--then we may finally be on a Birmingham-style slow redevelopment of Jackson but more like 10-15 years behind.

Anonymous said...

@9:12

Agree the hate for Jackson is real. Any town's citizens who continually vote for politicians like the ones that run Jackson must REALLY hate their town.

Rolling on 32's said...

Dog wash facilities? Obviously someone misunderstood someone else saying
"I want to be able to wash my caaaaahh, dog!"

Anonymous said...

10:38 & 10:40 either have a vested interest into this making it, or they have started early on the THC this morning. Lots of "huh, what" in those comments. Yes, everyone who disagrees with you is a redneck who has never left the state....what's that saying, "if ignorance is bliss..."

Krusatyr said...

The high end rentals around the hospitals thrive because of the hospital economics. The economy and location value has to exist before complimentary high end residential, such as expensive apartments can be justified.

Part of location value is convenience, safety and infrastructure. This project is not feasible as a practical matter, until crime, water, sewer, streets and blight are fixed.

Anonymous said...

I’m still holding out for the Metro center development - now that was a game changer!

Anonymous said...

@12:00pm, same here. I was hoping I could hop off the ferris wheel and bounce through the food court and then to my padna & dems upstairs loft apartment to bbq a steak. Sad that it didn't come to fruition, who would have thought it wouldn't have made it big?

Anonymous said...

One Lake, apartment version.

Anonymous said...

Reading comments on this blog on any Jackson related post always affirms the underlying reasons why we are the only state in the South - and maybe in the US - that does not have at least one vibrant metropolitan area…one of only 3 states to lose population from 2010 - 2020 and the only southern state to do so. We wallow in our own ignorance and lack of desire to be part of the solution to these problems. And laugh at our own Capital City. How dumb are we? Jackson is a mismanaged dump. That’s established. It’s also our Capital City and it generates the impression many outsiders have of Mississippi.

“Stupid is as stupid does.” -Forest Gump’s mother.

Anonymous said...

To the tune of Carly Simon's "Anticipation:"

Gentrification, Gentrification

Is making me wait ....

And tomorrow we might not be together
I'm no prophet and I don't know nature's ways
So I'll try and see into your eyes right now
And stay right here 'cause these are the good old days
And stay right here 'cause these are the good old days
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)

Gentrification, Gentrification ...

Anonymous said...


we don't hate jackson, we hate the way she is being governed. this project looks like a great project, for any city. the problem is, the location of this project. the problem is, the area around this project. the problem is, the criminal element that will pass by this project. the problem
is, the shitty roads to and from this project. the problem is, the shitty water service to this project.

everyone wants jackson to succeed. no one wants jackson to fail. us folks in the burbs see all the problems in jackson, and wonder why y'all keep putting up with it. don't get mad at us for pointing out, and making fun of your city leader's failures. their failures are on you, because they are your leaders. the very few people in jackson that actually vote, voted for this. y'all couldn't get 14000 people to vote for the other guy. that's not our fault, that's yours.

rankin county did not allow approximately 52,000,000 gallons, of literal shit water, to flow into the creeks to find its way to the pearl river. jackson did.

rankin county does not have the highest per capita murder rate in the entire united states. jackson does.

flowood, brandon, pearl, madison do not have an obscene number of boil water notices, low flow notices, turbid notices, water system failure notices. jackson does.

rankin county does not have a ridiculous number of car jackings. jackson does.

you folks in jackson need to stop being mad at the burbs for pointing out the complete failings of your elected leaders, and instead, direct your anger and frustration at the people in charge of your city.

Anonymous said...

The apartments at The District have a dog washing facility. Basically a room a hose with tile, a drain, a platform to put your dog on while you wash him along with some tie downs for the lease. It's a great idea that takes very little space. Maybe that's the problem with a lot of people on this site, they have no vision of what amenities will attract renters. As far as the person who said why rent when you can buy a 4/3, there are numerous reasons one of them being some people don't want the hassle of owning a home. Many won't be in Jackson more than a few years. If you're not in a house for more than three to five years, you're playing the housing market, taking a risk you don't need to take and spending a lot of money you don't need to spend.

Anonymous said...

@12:21
Do you truly believe that the reason Jackson is a festering shithole is because of the derision from the refugees in the suburbs, and not because of the lifestyle and violent culture of residents of the shithole?

Ask anyone who grew up in Jackson between the 1950-1990 and they will tell you how much they loved it and long for the old Jackson. I am too young to remember the Jackson before the late 1980s. And most of those memories were Metro Center related. The suburbanites didn’t destroy that area.

Jackson was once vibrant. People used to walk the promenades in their best clothes illuminated by neon lights. Democrats took that away from us.

Krusatyr said...

@12:21pm
"Lack of desire to be part of the solution to (solve) these (Jackson) problems."

JPS is actually the biggest culprit in Jackson's decay that must have Choice and Vouchers implemented to recover. An under educated population elected Lil Choke who, through his marxist and racist inefficiencies, has let Jackson rot to ruin.

Anonymous said...

So "One Lake" was mentioned upstream. Not sure the actual intended contextual reference, but the main "One Laker" failed at developing the McRae's property (and one lake). I would be suprised if he has anything to do with the new project, given the architects mentioned.....but I'll be paying attention and cheering the new folks on!!

Anonymous said...

Your little Southpark video is a little tired, don't ya think?

Anonymous said...

10:38 is in serious need of some serious meds. His anti-Christian diatribe has zero to do with the subject at hand. Of course, he trots out his anti-Trump paranoia even though Trump has nothing to do with this matter. He attacks the "uneducated" while supposedly supporting poor people. Gee, I didn't know that all the poor are highly educated while the rich are illiterate.

Anonymous said...

@9:12

It's not hate it's reality. I wouldn't live there if the rent was free and wouldn't eat at a restaurant in Jackson if the food was free.

The leaders of Jackson have created this eutopia for their constituents who obviously are content.

Anonymous said...

Well, I will have to give credit to the architect for beautiful concept and design work. I don't know anything about the experience of the developer or if he can pull it off on top of all of the other obstacles from the neighborhood issues and the city. I wish them the very best.

Anonymous said...

If this developer forms a partnership with that recent Metro Center developer great things could happen, right? For bonus points throw in the One Lake developer too.

Anonymous said...

It's too bad that the CCJ machine gun dude was arrested, because this proposed development could use his firepower.

Anonymous said...

Why not build it on the northeast corner of the Millsaps campus instead?

Anonymous said...

BYOW Bring Your Own Water. Thoughts are good but Reality is If it walk like a duck & looks like a duck; then it’s a duck. Another concept is after all the kickback/under the table $$ is given out at taxpayers expense; this will too go belly up and not pass the smell test. Be real as who would pay that kind of money put car tags to life in an unsafe area?

Anonymous said...

In my best Mr.Rogers' Neighborhood voice:

" Hello.

Can you say Harbor Walk ?

I knew you could "

Anonymous said...

Nice renderings and reality are two very different things. Best of luck to the developer, the project makes better sense in just about any other US city.

Anonymous said...

Maybe the residents of this development will also host events at the Convention Center.

It never seems to have a (paying) customer using it.

Anonymous said...

Y’all laugh but making this promo stuff is genius. European and Asian investors don’t know shit about local crime and corruption. They just know there is money to be made in snapping up new real estate. China has always tried to invest outside their saturated domestic market. If you build it, someone will buy it.

Anonymous said...

@4:05 Money laundering in crap real estate deals is also a good vehicle.

Anonymous said...

Curious if this location is an Opportunity Zone. If this site is in OZ, probably has a good chance to attract enough investors.

Anonymous said...

" Y’all laugh but making this promo stuff is genius. European and Asian investors don’t know shit about local crime and corruption."

Good Lord 4:05.

The local environment is one of the very first things any potential
investor looks at ... no matter the location.





Anonymous said...

10:24, the U.S.S. Jackson didn't sail, it sank.

Anonymous said...

Investors would have a more secure ROI by buying timber futures from Lamar Adams.

Anonymous said...

10:38 needs to calm down. We all would be happy if Jackson would improve. I used to live in Jackson and no, I don’t live in Madison or Rankin counties. I don’t know why you are bringing Trump, Proud Boys, or Majorie Taylor Greene into the mix. It’s Jackson’s leadership that makes themselves their own worst enemy. The sad part is the people that continually votes in these people. They are happy with it.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes a property owner will pay for a project rendering, albeit wholly impractical, just to unload the property.

That'sMisterDeplorableToYou said...

@12:34 Yeah I remember staying with my aunt and uncle in Jackson as a kid. They lived near the zoo and we would visit there often. I rode my tricycle in their front yard. I used to do business in Jackson frequently and on my lunch hour I'd sit on a bench outside and just girl watch. Downtown Jackson was just full of the prettiest women strolling by. Now days you'd be likely to be mugged. The last time I spent the night in Jackson at the new King Edward, the car in front of me got jacked. I often hear Jackson being described as "third world", and I don't think that is too strong of a term. It is truly a great loss and a momentous shame.

Anonymous said...

Imagine being the type of person to be negative about this…

Nevermind, 70 percent of y’all don’t have to imagine. I feel sorry for the people around you.

Anonymous said...

Not all of us would be happy if Jackson would improve, we know that will never happen. We are just wishing it would finally hit rock bottom so that something could finally be done about the shithole.

Anonymous said...

I heard that as part of this they're going to reopen Meadowbrook Cinema 6 and Seale-Lily. Maybe even Primos Northgate. Then they're gonna open a BB King's in the old Tiffany's Cabaret. Plus, a parking garage with robots.

Add to that the ferris wheel and the carousel that are coming soon to Metrocenter (#Cantwait) and the glory days of Jackson are just over the horizon!

Anonymous said...



"@4:05 Money laundering in crap real estate deals is also a good vehicle."
August 10, 2022 at 4:28 PM

Yup! Who ARE these people? Where did they come from? Where does their money come from?

Some of the above posts, seem to be from them or their minions. (It's Penny-ANTE, by the way: not "Penny Anny"). Their attempts at contempt for the "suburban Rednecks" are halfhearted, and reveal more fear than actual power.



Recent Comments

Search Jackson Jambalaya

Subscribe to JJ's Youtube channel

Archives

Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
.