Monday, August 8, 2022

Restaurants to Jackson: "We're Tapped Out"

A group of Jackson restaurant owners demanded Jackson and state leaders work together to fix Jackson's water problems at a press conference this afternoon. 

Pat Fontaine, Executive Director of the Mississippi Hospitality Association, kicked off the press conference with a snapshot of an industry buffeted by staffing shortages, higher food costs, and shutdowns.  While Jackson restaurants struggle to survive, water problems threaten to put them out of business.  He said boil water notices substantially increased their costs as they are forced to buy ice, water, and soft drinks.  

 

 

Andy Nesonson (Iron Horse Grill) said some restaurant owners are forced to get ice from as far away as Meridian as local supply can't meet the demand. "Many spend $500 to $700 per day" on additional supplies just so they can open their doors.  As the press conference rolled on, Clark Beverage delivered soft drinks to the restaurant.  Mr. Nesonson said the delivery was $725 and didn't include ice or bottled water. 

"Who pays for that? We do.  It doesn't come from the city.  It doesn't come from Public Works, insurance.  As restaurant owners, we incur those costs every day the city is under this notice," said the Iron Horse Grill General Manager.  "Simply put, we're tapped out.  We're running out of resources," he lamented.

David Cohn (Char, Saltin, Amerigo's) said business increases at Amerigo's 20% every time there is a boil water notice while business at Char and Saltine are down "twenty-plus" at the same time.  He said many customers are concerned over the safety of the food."  However, the water problems don't just affect customers but employees as well.  Mr. Cohn said employees are talking more and more about working outside of Jackson because of the barrage of boil water notices. He urged the politicians to put aside "their partisan differences and find a solution. Great leadership is action, not words.  We want action."  

Jackson's problems are becoming recruiting tools for developers - in Rankin and Madison counties.  Steven O'Neill (Aplos & The Manship) asked every restaurateur to raise a hand if they were recruited to move their restaurants out of Jackson.  All raised their hands.   He fired a warning shot at Jackson, pointing out most restaurants had leases that eventually expire.  "Business is business", said Mr. O'Neill as he said restaurants are going to move out of Jackson when their leases expire.  He said they aren't just signing five year leases but signing up for five years of water problems. 

Mr. Good closed the presser with a question:  Government is what we agree to do together. It is the basic cornerstone of our democracy, to work together to solve problems. Why are we unable to find resolution for this disastrous community health problem? Other cities throughout our nation have found paths through like challenges."

 

 Kingfish note: It should be noted several restaurant owners met with the City Council last week.  The Mayor appeared for a few seconds, claiming he had to attend another meeting.  However, the only Lumumba Administration representative to attend was City Attorney Tori Martin.  The Chief of Staff, Chief Administrative Officer, and no one from Public Works bothered to attend the meeting. 

 

94 comments:

Anonymous said...

I’m a conservative who hates the MAGAt line that “Democrats are trying to destroy the country.” (No, dumbass, they have a different vision & set of priorities than you or I.)

But if Baby Chock were trying to destroy Jackson & have it taken over by the State, would he be doing anything differently?

Anonymous said...

These business owners might as well be talking to a wall.

Anonymous said...

Chowke Lumbubbles knows that he will move on to another public trough position outside of Jackistan before the restaurant leases expire.

Anonymous said...

Action isn't in the Mayor's skill set.

Anonymous said...

Could someone do something with this clown of a mayor? Tate? EPA? Feds? Somebody get his ass out so we can get someone that will work and not just talk and sue.

He was at the plant today. They’re short-staffed. Did anyone think to give him a pair of gloves and a pair of boots and tell him to get to work?

Anonymous said...

@5:12
You clearly aren’t a conservative.
The leftist democrats are a cabal of rootless cosmopolitans who want global tyranny. That’s their vision.
Tyranny is the antithesis of Liberty and Freedom.

Anonymous said...

Does any thinking person think it’s a good idea for the state legislature to vote to hand money to the current leadership of the City of Jackson?

Anonymous said...

@ 5:12

Whether or not "Democrats are trying to destroy the country" is real or imaginary, the result is the same.

Leftist run cities are all s--t holes. Pick your poison: Jackson, New Orleans, Baltimore, New York city, Memphis, Cleveland, Houston whatever.

Everyone of them is a cesspool of crime, failure and poisonous cultures. And the left just passed another multi-billion dollar effort that will do nothing but make matters worse.

Anonymous said...

More crying from people who have known for a loooooonnnnngggg time that the city leaders don’t care. Now they want the state to get involved to make the city leaders care about them?? Pathetic. Jackson created this mess. They need to fix it. If you fix their mess then that’s a signal to every city in the state to divert funds from utilities to other things and the state will come bail you out.

Anonymous said...

@5:12 No, you are not conservative. The democrats are destroying America, just like they've destroyed Jackson.

Anonymous said...

Capital goes to where it’s appreciated. Move y’all’s capital to Madison where the local governmental leaders and citizens can appreciate it and you. I’ll never frequent another Jackson restaurant or business after watching its latest debacles. And I’m not alone.

Anonymous said...

Lumumba could be mayor for life if he would quit demonizing the folks who could help.

Local politics 101, do great things, then reap the spoils.

Anonymous said...

We always hear from the Jackson apologists and cheerleaders about the great restaurant scene. Well, if these restaurants are that good and they move then their clientele will follow. Nobody is clamoring to come to a great restaurant because it is specifically located in Jackson.

Anonymous said...

The State of MS didn't f87k this up. The State of MS isn't the party who botched the new meter, new billing system conversion.

Anonymous said...

I know the State doesn’t have a recall procedure, but certainly something can be done to remove an ineffective, incompetent executive!?!

Anonymous said...

Another goofy presser from many businessmen that should have been smart enough to get out years ago.

But they stayed.

And now they are whimpering like ten week old puppies, that don't know where to relieve their young canine selfs.

I have zero sympathy for any of these men.




Anonymous said...

“Great leadership is action, not words. We want action."

Say the man, and audience, taking no action and waiting on a handout to make his business thrive. Jeez

Krusatyr said...

Lil Choke needs pain, he's begging to be punished. If he is made to suffer sufficiently, and be shunned from positions of trust, Jackson can start again.

Even Virgie appears to have gotten religion and sniffed the devil in him.

Anonymous said...

5:36. nashville, birmingham, atlanta, dallas. you know, leftist cities where all the young people under 40 who were born in mississippi move to...

Anonymous said...

If these people had balls they would refuse service to the mayor and anyone in the mayor's administration.

Anonymous said...

5:13, thank you. agree 100%. you're not from here, are you?

Anonymous said...

Bailing out Jackistan is nothing but rewarding bad behavior and analogous to giving a heroin addict heroin on demand.

Just like an addict, Jackistan, like Detroit, will have to hit rock bottom before it can recover.

For you restaurateurs, don't hold your breath. Holding pressers is helpful in that they may educate the ignorant sheeple for vote for the boy mayor, but the water system will take years to fix.

Don't forget about the lead contamination in the water that y'all are using to cook, wash, and dispense to your customers.

Did y'all even mention the crime? Customer's cars being stolen in your lots? Carjackings?

Break your leases and get out of the cesspool that is Jackson.

Kingfish said...

I bet some of you like to blame blacks for Jim Crow and women for rape.

Anonymous said...

5:42, I disagree. I don’t think the state’s intervening in Jackson would send any sort of actionable signal to other municipalities because of all the other municipalities but one is the state’s capital. It is unconscionable that the City of Jackson allows its residents to languish without access to reliable, safe water and we have reached the point, as a state, where it has become unconscionable for the State of Mississippi to sit on its hands while those people languish. Ensuring access to clean, reliable water is a core function of government and I have no doubt there are plenty of well qualified lawyers who have proposed intervention strategies to state government leaders. What likely hasn’t yet happened is agreement among leadership about who gets what benefit in the horse trading politics, and that is on Republicans. Enough time has passed for the state to make and execute a plan to ensure the City of Jackson and those served by its water system have access to a basic need. Enough politics. Real people are enduring real suffering. It’s time for the few adults with the power to make corrections to act like adults and intervene.

Anonymous said...

2022-2023 Legislature, please assume control of your capitol city. This can be handled legislatively. You tried to take the airport and failed. You could have taken the school system and chickened out. Quit playing politics and give us a capitol we can be proud of. De-annex 80% of the city and give it to the county and fix the rest.

Anonymous said...

I need to buy some giant ice machines

Anonymous said...

Email Harvard if you went to school there. If you didn’t then still email the school. I did. Who the heck was behind giving the mayor that award and why?

If the restaurants leave then a lot of people still left in Jackson will follow. Only who knows how many of those people will leave for the burbs and not somewhere further away.

This is infuriating how much this mayor has sucked. WLBT, WAPT, and WJTV should be contacting their parent companies.

The restaurant owners should get the word out if they want to have a protest. I think a lot of people will show up if it’s at a time when not a lot of people are busy at work. I’ve never been to a protest but I would go to that one.

Unknown said...

This is a 100% City of Jackson problem. The state has NOTHING to do with it! The Feds have NOTHING to do with it! It's all on Chowke the Clown.

Anonymous said...

Had no idea that CS’s is still open for business. Every time I ride by there, which is rare, it is closed. Sign of the times…

Anonymous said...

They need to close their business and move out of Jackson NOW. The ship has sailed.

Anonymous said...

CS's open hours were unpredictable 20 years ago. I can only imagine now. But I did love the burger.

Anonymous said...

Went to Iron Horse last week. Twice for business meetings. Still serving good food and fantastic chips. And bottled water and canned soft drinks due to the water thing. Very depressing.

Anonymous said...

Think the city is making any progress getting that convention center hotel going? I bet all the major chains are clamoring to build water wells.

Anonymous said...

Luckily, the city had had the foresight to earmark Katrina money, covid money, and the Sieman’s settlement, and the 1% sales tax revenue directly into the water infrastructure

Anonymous said...


No 5:12, it's not a MAGA line, it's the stated goal of the progressive left if you'd take the time to actually do some research on the matter. They can't build their progressive/socialist paradise without tearing down the existing family/religion/society/government. frighteningly, they are even less competent at than the leadership of Jackson, which should scare you into voting against them whether you like the MAGA leadership or not.

Anonymous said...

Let's say the state really did pull up stakes and move the capitol. What would be left? Probably Martins. And the bike trails at Butts Park. And Prime Time. Hell, JSU should probably move out.

Anonymous said...

“ I bet some of you like to blame blacks for Jim Crow and women for rape.
August 8, 2022 at 7:03 PM”

Those people would be considered victims. A restaurant owner who has been in business for a very long time in Jackson isn’t a victim. They’ve know about the problems and looked the other way until it hit their wallets. Now they’re mad and desperate and a lot of people are tired of their whining.

Anonymous said...

Demolish metro center. All the way to the dirt. Then take all of the Jackson waste water and sprinkle it on the premises. Then start a pot farm. Great interstate access and great dirt.

Anonymous said...


6:40 I notice you mentioned cities in Republican run states. Know a lot of college graduates moving to Chicago, Detroit, Portland, Baltimore or St. Louis..? Neither do I.

Anonymous said...

I can’t even fathom the cries of racism if the state takes over Jackson. It is a no win situation for the state. Why would the state try to work with these elected officials that can’t even figure out how to straighten out water billing and are suing each other? No one wants to be a part of that. Unless they do things on Lumumba terms (which haven’t worked so far), it will be declared racism.

Anonymous said...

" Just like an addict, Jackistan, like Detroit, will have to hit rock bottom before it can recover."

Moot point.

Jackson hit "rock bottom" many years ago.
But it seems to the rest of the state, the citizens of that town are indifferent.

But as is often said, this is what they voted for.

There is no way in Hell ... Tupelo,Biloxi/Gulfport,Hattiesburg, Meridian, Southaven, Madison, Brandon and many others should be taxed to "bail-out" Jackson.

Not no, but HELL NO !

Geeze, so it's the "Capitol City".
"Big whoop".

(Move the Damn Capitol).

The Capitol has been moved more than a few times during our state's history.

And over the last few years, the boy mair has done more damage than
General Sherman with a box of matches and ten gallons of kerosene.




Anonymous said...

Inept leadership is neither democrat or republican, conservative or liberal, black or white, male or female; and there are plenty of examples of such in all of the aforementioned groups of leaders. Jackson's problems of aging infrastructure, water issues, etc. were not created by Mayor Lumumba. However, his leadership style, and general lack of knowledge re:how to effectively deal with the issues of the city and lack of wisdom/common sense re: effective negotiation and cooperation with all stakeholders, has clearly exacerbated the problems. He and his administration are in over their heads. The problems and issues are overwhelming, and will require what is currently lacking --- 1) a strategic, comprehensive plan with adequate funding that prioritizes what is best for ALL citizens (not just those considered disenfranchised) and the city; 2) a plan that sets aside ego, hidden agendas and a need to control what is clearly out of control; 3) truth, wisdom and integrity ---characteristics that appear to be anomalies in america today. Now as the voices of disapproval grow louder, and the negative impact of the crises facing Jackson becomes more widespread, who is able, and who will rise to the occasion?

burton39110 said...

Unfortunately it the boiling frog scenario for the restaurants. They not did see or ignored the temp was rising until it was too late. I do feel for them but owning a business is a risk and it is not up to the taxpayers of the state to bail anyone out. I live in a well managed area and don’t want my taxes being to used to bail out people who ignored the facts. People who have businesses or homes in Jackson are living in the past and will pay a hefty price for staying.

Anonymous said...

KF,

No one can place blame on these businesses for the state of affairs, BUT if someone takes no action to remove themselves from the problem they are subject to ridicule. If it’s pouring rain and you don’t get out of it you can’t complain that you get soaked.

Anonymous said...

" Had no idea that CS’s is still open for business. Every time I ride by there, which is rare, it is closed. Sign of the times…"

Same here !
Are Pat and Inez still there ?

But then again, I'm sure CS's falls into that category of:

"Who cares, just another White place none of us have heard of" ...

Anonymous said...

7:32. 640 here. way to move the bar! so jackson is smack in the center of this red state. people aren’t coming to jackson in droves for
the state governmental policies…

and they don’t move to
nashville for the state of TN but
to live in the city.

Anonymous said...

Ahoy! Federal receivership/bailout off the port bow....

Anonymous said...

Thank you restaurant owners for speaking out- you are one of the only pleasant venues left in Jackson. Thank you for your investment-
and commitment. Please continue to speak out- media , legislature, governor, and senators- Washington.
On another note- every business in Jackson that provides water/food, etc is incurring extra cost. Any business
that provides water for employees, customers, or any food preparation - everyone is having to spend more for
usable water. Big effect on Jackson Churches too. What are the schools doing for water and food prep, cleaning, etc?
everyone effected- speak up!

Anonymous said...

The only things these clowns are capable of doing is talking and blaming. As far as running a city a potato could do a better job, Jackson is a failure, this is what happens when you let unqualified idiots operate freely.

Anonymous said...

Jackson Mayor Chokwe Antar Lumumba received the John F. Kennedy New Frontier Award on Saturday, March 26. The Harvard Kennedy School presents the award to those under the age of 40 who are changing their communities and country with their commitment to public service.

Anonymous said...

Who was the last competent mayor of Jackson, anyway?

Anonymous said...

Anyone can get the award if they pay for the “training.” It’s the equivalent to Mississippi Business Journal’s Top [insert career field]. If you put mayor or executive director on your linked in, you will receive a solicitation from the Kennedy center

Anonymous said...

I see Ludumba as char often… also at broad street. I hope Jeff kicks his ass out of there. I know many in chat and broad street would be thrilled to see that
Manship needs to ban the administration also.

Anonymous said...

5:12, Im with you 100%. It’s true, regardless what the wackos say.

/s conservative who doesn’t fear others

Anonymous said...

@ 5:12 The first step to correct a problem is to correctly identify the problem. You need to go back to square one.

Anonymous said...

9:37, exactly.

Anonymous said...

8:15 pm- If people think that people are moving into the cities of Birmingham, Atlanta, etc., most likely they are actually moving to suburbs of those cities. Birmingham, for example, has one of the highest murder rates in the country. Homewood is more likely the target. Buckhead is trying to become separate from Atlanta. The suburbs are more likely for newbies. Instead of Nashville, they prefer Franklin. Unfortunately the residents of these cities, including Jackson, seem bent on voting themselves into oblivion.

Anonymous said...

The Mayor doesn’t care. I feel terribly for them. It’s not how it should be. But bitching about a problem that won’t change won’t change the problem.

Anonymous said...

Answer to 9:21: Dale Danks was the last competent mayor of Jackson. He was the last of his kind, and he is missed.

Anonymous said...

"Answer to 9:21: Dale Danks was the last competent mayor of Jackson. He was the last of his kind, and he is missed."

Yes he was and yes he is. Danks got us through both historical floods of '79 and '83. Catastrophic floods for the City of Jackson. In fact, those were probably the only 2 periods of "water problems" in his 12 years as Mayor.

Anonymous said...

Technically doubt anyone has a configuration of the underground and above ground water and sewage piping, pumps, infrastructure for the city. Even the electrical service better documented and understand I bet a diet Coke is lacking configuration management. Without a project leader, a decent plan and ability to hold others accountable to work the plan, this is an extremely hard fix, possible now beyond the ability for a fix, eroded piping, leaking valves, etc.in other words, do not assume anything will be radically improved.

Anonymous said...

**Thank you restaurant owners for speaking out- you are one of the only pleasant venues left in Jackson. Thank you for your investment-
and commitment.**

Thank you, Sweetie, for taking the time to stop by the funeral home and sign the book.

Anonymous said...

The State of Mississippi needs to stay out of Jackson's problems. This is a set up by Fuckway Lumbooty to promote himself to higher office by playing the race card. The state can work on the improving the CID to make it safe in downtown. All you liberal restaurants owner are welcome to move to Madison or Rankin County but please leave your old world views back in Jackson because it doesn't work like this over here in Madison or Rankin county.

Anonymous said...

@5:25

Thanks for presuming to know my mind.

Thirteen minutes. That’s how long it took for a disciple of Cheeto Jesus to take offense. Nah, you people aren’t a cult. Not at all.

Anonymous said...

For any of these people who have invested significant money into their businesses in the last decade or so, I have no sympathy for them, they Jxn had hit bottom and was continuing to dig.

Unknown said...

I worked all my life with cities all over the country and Jackson is beyond help. Nothing allowed by law can fix Jackson , nothing. This did not happen over night and for over 30 years it has been in decay. The owners could see many years ago that Jackson was no place to do business and should have moved then. Also Jackson can and should not be taken over by another level of government. It has to just fully die and bury it.

Anonymous said...

Complaining about Jackson water at this point is like building a café on the banks of the Pearl and complaining about it flooding from time to time. Just what the hell did you guys think was going to happen ?

Unknown said...

August 9, 2022 at 7:55 AM
You certainly aren't a conservative. You may be a neo-con. But you definitely aren't conservative. You have more in common with neo-liberal Democrats.

Anonymous said...

@10:30, you are wrong about Nashville. The housing market in the city is booming.

Anonymous said...

I don't fully understand the argument that "we must save the state capital...because its the state capital!"

This notion that because it is the location for a bunch of lazy politicians to meet, and some imaginary tourism hot spot...so we must rescue it, is so silly.

If the state capital is a hell hole then so be it.

The rest of us did not cause it and most of us don't even go there. So stop clutching pearls and acting like there is some inherent obligation and duty to save it "because ITS THE CAPITAL!"

Anonymous said...

Not everyone in Belhaven, Fondren, and NE Jackson are liberal. Most of the white liberal people that I know that hangout in Jackson actually live in the burbs.

Anonymous said...

Does this constitute a force majeure in terms of their rental contracts? If so, I bet there are some nervous property owners. I bet if they started talking about not paying taxes due to their tenants not being able to operate without functioning water, the heat will get turned up.

Anonymous said...

I do understand their frustration with the City; however, Char and Aplos might have included the fact that contributing to their loss in sales is all the crime which is now plaguing Highland Village and Maywood Mart. Management is doing what it can, but auto thefts, vandalism happen daily with no end in sight and it's only going to get worse with the holidays coming.

Anonymous said...

So where are the black bar and restaurant owners of Jackson? Are they not speaking out because of some misguided, misplaced loyalty? Bet Lumbumble would take action if some of the complainers were black.

Anonymous said...

Jackson water problems go back 50 years.

As people left / leave it only gets worse.

This is a federal issue in as much as it’s a health and safety issue.

Billion dollar plus issue….the feds should mandate a time frame and fund it.

Kingfish said...

Except the owners and managers are saying they can pinpoint the increases and decreases to the boil water notices.

Anonymous said...

Jackson is a ghetto, a shithole. It has been that for quite a few years but the last few years has finally finished Jackson. The only people the leaders of Jackson are worried about are the thieves, thugs, and criminals that roam the city. They are welcomed with open arms and given protection from other areas where they have committed crimes.

Any restaurant that is still in Jackson has been warned long ago that the city was dying. For some reason a few decided to stay in the third world city. Now they are crying because they do not have city services. Wake up, third world cities usually do not have the same city services that other cities provide. You chose to stay. Instead of coming on tv crying about how hard you have it why not do something about it?

Anonymous said...

10:30 is also wrong about Birmingham. Avondale is booming-and it was a nightmare 10 years ago. Want to play TopGolf? it's right downtown next to the new football stadium (usfl played there), and the barons park. (and they moved from the burbs to downtown)

seems like your idea of young people is to immediately flock to the suburbs like they do here. sorry--it's the city and urban diverse living our young people are leaving for.

Anonymous said...

Restaurateurs complaining aren't that unlike the Jacksonians who comment here at JJ that they waited too long and can't afford economically to leave Jackson. They know their investment is headed to zero, or near-zero, but instead of getting out at a smaller loss now they'll defy logic and will ride their Jackson assets all the way to the bottom. Just like the people who rode Worldcom stock all the way to the bottom.

Anonymous said...

... contributing to their loss in sales is all the crime which is now plaguing Highland Village and Maywood Mart. Management is doing what it can, ...

Highland Village management is NOT doing all it can. Auto related crime there is off the charts.

Anonymous said...

Young people are leaving Mississippi for job, jobs and jobs. Not because Jackson is a dump.

Anonymous said...

10:23, young people are leaving for cities with great job opportunities, vibrant downtowns, appreciating real estate, running potable water, and shit not running thru their backyards. That’s not Jackson my friend.

Anonymous said...

I am happy that young people want to live in urban areas.
To each their own and find your bliss!

Just don't ask the surrounding areas to fund your urban utopia when your elected heroes fail you

That anyone with any intelligence can ask the state for funding, when the city has factually squandered millions is hilarious.

I suppose I should not be surprised from the generation that wants me to pay my student loan theirs.

Anonymous said...

I guess Lumumba is going to have to blame something other than lime slurry for the low pressure since already used that excuse for the turbidity.

Anonymous said...

10:39am, Highland Village management isn’t responsible for all the crime on their property. That’s why they pay taxes to the city of Jackson, to prevent crime so they can do business in their incorporated area and make enough money to pay their taxes. If management is responsible for the crime and has to police their own property, Jackson shouldn’t get any tax revenue from them. But Jackson elected officials are inept, and this is why all businesses will be leaving Jackson sooner than later.

Anonymous said...

10:39am, Highland Village management isn’t responsible for all the crime on their property.

So what portion, what percentage, of the crime are they responsible for?

If management is responsible for the crime and has to police their own property, Jackson shouldn’t get any tax revenue from them.

So, therefore, Highland Village will also exempt itself from fire protection?

They can take the attitude you are taking all day and night long. Their business will suffer because of it.

Their business is already suffering because of it.

Anonymous said...

So HV management should hire an armed militia to guard their property, double the rents, put every tenant out of business, to ensure your car won’t get broke into? Their business is suffering because it’s located in the most violent city in the world. Nothing going to change that under this administration. But keep giving the city a pass on its obligations to the taxpayers, soon they won’t have any taxpayers to be obligated to.

Anonymous said...

Jackson restaurateurs are caught in the monkey trap:

"It is said you can trap a monkey by putting a nut through a small hole
in a gourd. The monkey reaches in and grabs the nut, but then his fist
won’t fit back through the hole. Greedy monkeys will literally let
themselves be caught rather than let go of the nut."

Anonymous said...

Yesterday afternoon, Costco had exactly ZERO cases of Kirkland water on pallets. Normally, there are more pallets full than you could count. As a 39157 resident, it may sound a bit NIMBY for me to post this, but now Choke has me good and pissed off, too.

Anonymous said...

Get ready Jackson, water pressure likely headed to zero.

Anonymous said...

Nice that they have spares for such critical pumps

Anonymous said...

Does the polluter, aka the City of Jackson, criminally spew less raw sewage into the environment when the water pressure drops?

Anonymous said...

They should really try some "action".

You know, since all the talking does not seem to be improving the water situation.

Anonymous said...

Let me add a bright spot to the restaurant/ water problem. My wife and I are taking our granddaughters down to the Coast for a few days. On the way through Florence they wanted a Whataburger. So we pulled into Whataburger on 49S. Who did we see but Inez from our days eating an Inez Burger at CSs. I don’t believe I’ve been to CSs since I retired about nine years ago. It made me fill great that she recognized me. Good to see old friends.



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Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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