Wednesday, May 6, 2009

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17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hail never cooperates when you can have some fun........

Anonymous said...

jumping in pools?

Kingfish said...

I walked across the front yard while it was hailing. Barely even felt it.

I bet they sleep with night lights too.

Anonymous said...

They should have all piled in the Yugo.......

stilettoGOP said...

under desks..?? geesh. there are reasons to do that, and hail isn't one of them.

Anonymous said...

The Doppeltweets are satire; they're supposed to look like overblown, losing-my-shit reactions to weather because that's what the weather tweets look like. Duh.

Anonymous said...

But instead, they make the JFP look like they are overblown, in addition to constantly losing their shit. Satire on Twitter doesn't work. It's stupid and annoying. Yes, I am a follower of JFP on Twitter, because they occasionally tweet something useful or interesting. This is not the case with Doppletweets, which incidentally sounds incredibly idiotic. But that's nothing new for the Freep.

Kingfish said...

This was emailed to me by several peole. Funny how they all thought it was serious. Of course, after they have freaked out on several stories, anyone remember the gas cloud after the truck flipped on I-10 on the coast?,, it doesn't get pulled off that well.

Anonymous said...

Doppletweets = meaningless gratuitous JFP manure

ANALYST said...

The JFP beating on the Clarion Ledger is because they have standing she wishes to destroy.

JJ readers beating on the JFP is because she has standing they wish to destroy.

Otherwise, WHY BOTHER?

Kingfish said...

1. All the media gets bashed on here. Enter Clarion-Ledger in the search box and see for yourself. I used to call WLBT and WJTV the Axis of Melton on here.

2. Most of the JFP stuff is emailed to me by readers. I don't go out of my looking for it but if its sent to me and I find it funny or deserving of comment, then I'll post it.

3. No standing as I'm not in competition with them. I don't care if they go out of business or prosper, makes no business to me. They do get praised on here from time to time. However, no one else in the local media trashes people the way they do and exhibit a stage of ugliness such as the JFP towards those who fall in their cross hairs.

When they do things like refer to Mississippi as the "Mexico of the U.S.", they are going to get called out or when they trash Leah Rupp or every other female reporter in town, notice will be taken. No one would care if they just criticized but they go past legitimate criticism. Their reporting is no better than the Clarion-Ledger's or WAPT's. They are better writers but they are just as challenged on facts and subject matter knowledge.

Anonymous said...

After reading the JFP's (insert Ladd) take on "Race Leaves Mark in Mayoral Race", it makes me sick to realize she thinks has some sort of moral high ground. She's sick, sick, sick. Did I mention sick? As in, not feeling well. That's one sick beotch.

Anonymous said...

A year from now she'll still be milking Melton for stories and her teachable moment claptrap. She better buy a big ass bouquet of flowers for his memorial service considering all he did for her. Now that Frank has cleared the decks Ladd can return to hatin' Haley Barbour and the others she regularly abuses.

stilettoGOP said...

"Race Leaves Mark in Mayoral Race"

Have to admit I've been reading that one over there, and if I keep reading it..a BOOM you hear one night will be my head exploding. Their black/white shit has me THISCLOSE to chiming in. and it would not be pretty.

Anonymous said...

Happy to say I've not been to that website in two years and don't see the printed version of that sleaze which is apparently stacked outside of convenience stores. I feel so clean. Happy Friday to all!

stilettoGOP said...

Haha, you feel clean. That was a good way to put it ;) yeah I only lurk over there eeevery once in a while. End up disgusted. I bet they'd really care too.. something tells me JFP wouldn't be big Stiletto fans. Bra burnin ugly liberal hippies can have a coke and a smile.

Happy fri to you, too. Rock on.

Anonymous said...

Happy to say I've not been to that website in two years ...

No problem. You can catch all the funlights here! Because if you've read one edition of the JFP, you've read 'em all.



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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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