Friday, October 17, 2008

Business Dopery at The Clarion-Ledger















Once again The Clarion-Ledger publishes its ignorance on items of an economic nature. A brickbat goes to Kevin Richardson, the so-called business editor, who accused Treasury Secretary Paulson in his column Sunday for supposedly not using the tools given to him in the Bacardi Bailout to fix the crisis in our economy:
"But a week after the bill was enacted, none of the funds has been released and most of us have stopped checking the value of our investment accounts tied to the stock market for fear of a heart attack or nervous breakdown.
Why the delay?
For the record, I supported the bailout legislation because of the potential for calamity if nothing were done. (
You did? You mean you actually read some of the bill? If you did, where was this analysis because you never published it in this newspaper. How come you don't have a blog by the way? Even the copy editor has one.)
But I am concerned by the inaction of the administration's economic advisers to disburse the money. And as the world waits, stocks continue to plummet.
The Dow has dropped eight consecutive days, losing 22 percent of its value, the worst performance since the Depression. There is no way to know where markets would be today if the legislation was not approved
...." http://www.clarionledger.com/article/20081012/COL0102/810120350/1303/biz









Is this guy serious? After reading his drivel, one must question if Mr. Richardson even read any part of the bill or knows what the terms are. Mr. Richardson thinks the Secretary should be buying mortgages and other assets one week after the bill became law. Is the "Business Editor" really this ignorant? The Secretary could not do anything until the bill was passed. Mr. Richardson needs to watch "I'm Just a Bill" on Schoolhouse Rock as it takes more than seven days to set up the tools needed to buy mortgages, auction them off, hire the necessary employees such as fund and property managers, write guidelines, establish procedures, etc. However, Mr. Paulson did take action to inject $250 billion in American banks earlier in the week. Too bad that was not fast enough for Mr. Richardson, who like most so-called journalists, writes about what other people do while not actually doing anything himself.

However, Mr. Richardson continues on his ignorant way, focusing solely on the Dow. Its the freezing of the credit markets, not the Dow that is killing the economy. Mr. Richardson does not mention the credit markets anywhere in his column even though its the most important problem in this crisis. We can get by with a falling stock or bond market, however, our economy will CRASH with a frozen credit market. He also fails to mention the fact that these credit default swaps are crippling balance sheets. The causes of this problem: the overleveraging of credit default swaps, off-balance sheet accounting, implosion of the housing market, interest rates kept too low for too long, etc didn't took years to develop and won't be mitigated in seven days. Unfortunately for the readers, Mr. Richardson mentions none of these factors.

The economic dopery carries over to another story in the newspaper concerning the local housing market. Reporter Laroye Brown used the Martins' effort to sell their home on Mossline Drive in Jackson to demonstrate how much the Jackson real estate market has softened. Unfortunately for Mr. Brown, the story showed his ignorance as well for he missed several basic facts in his story. He wrote: "Wayne Martin and his wife, Patricia, have had their home on Mossline Drive in Jackson up for sale for two months but have had no luck in attracting a buyer." http://www.clarionledger.com/article/20081012/BIZ/810120348/1005/biz


TWO months. Our esteemed business reporter considers a home sitting on the market for two months to be evidence it is tougher to sell a home in Jackson. Most homes take 3 or more months to sell, a fact Mr. Brown should know. The picture of the Martin residence showed some very obvious problems with the saleability of the home that were completely missed by the reporter. Did anyone notice the "For Sale by Owner" sign? The Martins are not even using a realtor, depriving themselves of the benefit of the MLS. The Martins thus limited the exposure of their home to potential buyers. The home also DOES NOT HAVE A GARAGE!!! Think that might have SOMETHING to do with the reason why the house has not sold for a grand total of TWO MONTHS? No listing, no garage, 60 days on the market, yeah, its a real tough market right now. Mr. Brown, do yourself a favor. The next time you publish a story, why don't you actually read what you write as well as actually looking at your photographs. 'Nuff said.









Maybe The Jackson Free Press is on the right track in just running news feeds on its so-called business blog as the quality of business reporters available in Mississippi might just be that bad. As the job market in the financial/investment services industries is shaky right now, surely the newspaper can fire these so-called business journalists and hire a stockbroker who can write as just about anything would be an improvement.

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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