Friday, July 31, 2015

Can Gov. Fordice whip some ass from the grave?

JPD issued the following press release:



13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Whoa.

Anonymous said...

Jackson residents steal guns everyday. They just happened to have stolen a unique one this time.

Anonymous said...

Pretty sure that's not an M4 rifle. If it was, there would be federal firearms charges. He's a convicted felon, no FFL for you.

Anonymous said...

I'd have figured Fordice to be a 1911 guy.

Anonymous said...

JPD needs to learn how to write and use MS Word - their press releases look like shit.

Anonymous said...

Is it my imagination, or is the barrel of pistol bent?

Gambler53 said...

Is it my imagination or is the barrel of the pistol bent?

RandomHero said...

Semi auto pistols have a loose, free floating barrel inside the slide. When opened, they tend to float up

Anonymous said...

You obviously don't own a firearm, 6:33.

Everything else aside, I'm sure the family of the Governor will be happy to have this firearm returned to them.

Anonymous said...

"JPD needs to learn how to write and use MS Word - their press releases look like shit."

Face it, it you can't (or refuse to) speak correctly, you won't write properly. Our city leaders are no better. Being able to use big words from a thesaurus does not make you sound intelligent. City Hiring Authorities don't even pay attention to language skills. As long as they live in or agree to move to Jackson, all is well with the world. Nobody really cares though, as it just proves what everyone already knows.

Anonymous said...

Gov. Fordice asked me to meet with him in his office one time to discuss a matter of mutual interest. I was about 40 years old then and owned a small construction business. He was EXACTLY the same guy you saw on TV. As our conversation unfolded several things I said reminded him of an old story he wanted to share. I soon realized that the few minutes time allotted to our meeting was being eaten up by his interrupting me with yet another war story. Finally, I started interrupting him back. This did not bother him in the least. At one point I realized that I was about two feet from him with both my elbows on his desk and we were having a grand time. He invited me to some political convention and urged me to get more involved in politics. I had seen what a small contractor turned politician looked like on the news each night and decided that I was not cut out for politics. But I have fond memories of our meeting.

Anonymous said...

Easy answer: it's not bent that's how it's designed

The TL:DR read version is that most semi automatic pistols these days use a locking mechanism similar to the delayed recoil mechanism John Browing designed. So when the gun recoils the slide comes back and the barrel tilts via a cam to allow loading of the next round. Thus appearing like the barrel is bent upwards.

Anonymous said...

8:44pm is mostly correct.

Just for accuracy's sake, the barrel "tilting" really has little to do with loading the next round. The tilting doesn't hinder re-loading or anything either. The feed ramp handles the loading of the next round. But the tilt of the barrel is entirely due to unlocking from the slide. Now, in design, the feed ramp has to work with the unlocking style and align the barrel to feed reliably.

In a Glock, the short recoil design is based on the locking lug on the barrel. The rear of the barrel drops to allow for the slide to continue to travel rearward. The slide and barrel are "locked" together when in battery and both slide backwards slightly together, that's when the rear of the barrel drops and allows the slide to continue the ejection / reloading.


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Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


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Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

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