Wednesday, May 6, 2020

Judges Announced for "Tell Me Something Good" MPACT Scholarship

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State Treasurer David McRae today announced the nine judges who will be evaluating submissions for the "Tell Me Something Good" Scholarship Program. Each week in May, a Mississippi PreK-12 student will be awarded a $529 College Savings Mississippi scholarship for doing good in their communities during the COVID-19 pandemic.

The "Tell Me Something Good" Judging Panel includes:

  • First Lady of Mississippi Elee Reeves
  • Katie Blount, Director of Mississippi Department of Archives and History
  • Kimberly Remak, Executive Director of Trinity Health Center, Inc.
  • Tray Hairston, Partner at Butler Snow LLP
  • Holly Lange, Executive Director of Mississippi Book Festival
  • Ron Matis, Mississippi United Pentecostal Church
  • Jennifer Nicaud, Attorney at Copeland Cook Taylor & Bush
  • Jim Prince III, President and CEO of Prince Media Group
  • Clayton Stanley, President of The Alliance

"I am thrilled to have this distinguished group of people join us in presenting a $529 Tell Me Something Good scholarship to Mississippi young people," said McRae. "We understand these are hard times for many families, and yet, we've seen young people rise from the crisis to do incredible things within their communities. Submissions have already started coming in, so I know these nine judges have their work cut out in selecting a winner each week."

To enter the contest, students must be nominated by a family member, friend, teacher or community member. To nominate a student, please complete the online registration form. Entries are due every Thursday at 5PM and winners will be announced each Monday in May.

About the Mississippi Affordable College Savings Program (MACS)

Students will be awarded the scholarship via a MACS account. MACS makes giving the gift of college easy and affordable. Almost anyone can open a MACS account for a child or loved one for as little as $25. Families can use the tax-advantaged account for future college expenses, such as tuition, books, supplies and certain room-and-board expenses. The funds can also be used for elementary and secondary tuition expenses. For more information, please visit

Kingfish note: I just couldn't resist including this old Art Buchwald column. 

 One day … I went to the supermarket to buy some groceries form y wife. On the way home I stopped at an art gallery where they were holding a pop-art exhibit. Unfortunately, the carton of groceries got heavy, and I left them on the floor. Then, being so moved by what I saw, I Left the gallery and went home. “Where are groceries?” my wife demanded. “Oh, my gosh,” I cried. “I left them at the art gallery.” “Well you’d better get them if you want any supper tonight.” 

I rushed back to the gallery, but I was too late. The groceries had been awarded first prize in the show. “We’ve been looking everywhere for you,” the gallery owner said. “Why didn’t you sign your work of art?” “It’s not a work of art. It’s my dinner for tonight.” 

The gallery roared with appreciative laughter.””He’s not only a great sculptor, but he has humour as well,” a judge said. “ You can see that in his work,” another judge added. “ Notice how the bottle of Heinz catsup is leaning against the can of Campbell’s park and beans.” “I’ll never know how he was inspired to put the Ritz crackers on top of the can of Crisco,” a lady said to her escort. “It’s pure genius,” the escort replied. “ Notice the way the Del Monte can of peaches is lying on its side. Even Andy Warhol wouldn’t have gone that far.” “ I think the thing that really won the prize for him was the manner in which he crushed the Sara Lee cheesecake on the bottom of the box.” “ It makes Picasso look sick.”

“Look“, I said.”I’m very grateful for all these honours, but my wife is waiting for this stuff, and I have to get it home.” “Get it home?” the gallery owner said amazement. “ I’ve just sold it to that couple over there for 1,500 Dollar.” “The groceries cost me only 18 dollar”, I replied. “ It isn’t the groceries. It’s what you did with them. You have managed to put more meaning into a box of Rinso than Rodin put into ‘The Thinker’. Nobody will ever be able to look at a can of Franco-American spaghetti without thinking of you. You have said with this bag of groceries, in one evening, what Rembrandt tried to say in 1,000 paintings.” 

I bushed modestly and accepted his check. That night I took my wife out to dinner, and the next day I went back to the supermarket and bought another bag of groceries, much more expensive than the previous ones, which I immediately took to the gallery. But the reviews were lousy. “Success has gone to his head,” said Washington’s leading art critics. “Where once he was able to produce simple jars of cat food and peanut butter in a wild, reckless, I-don’t-give-a-damm manner, he is now serving up elegant cans of mushrooms and mock-turtle soup. 

“The famous touch is gone and all that is left is a hodgepodge of tasteless groceries.”

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).

Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.

In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS