Thursday, January 31, 2019

WLBT Questions JPD Crime Reports

What's in a number? Quite a bit if it is the crime statistics for Jackson.  WLBT's C.J. Lemaster dived deep into the crime stats for Jackson and didn't like what he found.  He reported:

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While Hood Raises $1 Million

The Jim Hood for Governor Campaign issued the following statement.

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Tate Raises nearly $2 Million.

The Tate Reeves for Governor campaign issued the following statement .

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Ole Miss Hoopster Tries to Get the Hook-Up

Sometimes it's never a good idea to mess with the other team.... or their women as an Ole Miss basketball player found out last night:

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Bigger Pie Forum: More Reform Needed for Civil Asset Forfeiture

This is a sponsored post by Bigger Pie Forum.  

In Mississippi just 18 months ago, law enforcement agencies enjoyed a “eat what you kill” system where they could merely tie property or cash to a crime to a judge and be able to seize it, even if the property owner wasn’t charged with a crime.  The property owner would have to file suit in civil court within 30 days to recover their property or else the agency would get to keep the property.


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Wednesday, January 30, 2019

Eating Their Own

Apparently more than a few bedwetters are upset that the former Starbucks CEO might, gasp, run for President.  Roll out the tumbrils.  The Wall Street Journal reported: 

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Cancelled

The first two sessions of Coco with the PoPo were cancelled this week: 

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Grant Awarded to Record Asylum Hill Descendants' Stories

UMMC issued the following press release written by Garry Pettus. 

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Super Steve is BACK!

 He's bad, he's black, and he's BACK!  Election Man has nothing on Super Steve up in Holmes County . (In That Movie Guy voice) When the county cratered, one hero came forth.... Super Steve!

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Sid Salter: Bennie Thompson & President Trump Battle Over Border Security

Mississippi Second District U.S. Rep. Bennie Thompson has been an unapologetic liberal on social issues for the whole of his long congressional career and that stance has certainly applied to issues surrounding immigration.

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Tuesday, January 29, 2019

"The Snow Might Actually Stick This Time."

The snowstorm that wasn't.....

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VINDICATED & ACQUITTED!!!

The Mississippi Court of Appeals overturned Ben Allen's conviction.  The Court stated:

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Pelahatchie Man Pleads Guilty to Child Porn

The Justice Department issued the following statement.

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City Council Approves Contract Negotiations with New Zoo Management Company

The Jackson City Council voted unanimously to enter contract negotiations with ZoOceanarium, LLC to manage the Jackson Zoo at a special meeting yesterday.  ZoOceanarium will replace the Jackson Zoological Society, which has managed the zoo since 1986. 

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JPD Discusses Robinson Investigation

Jackson Mayor Chokwe Antar Lumumba issued the following statement yesterday. 

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Monday, January 28, 2019

CPR Burglar on the Prowl

JPD issued the following statement and photo.

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It's All About the Caliber

Duck-hunting with a .380? MDOC issued the following statement.

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Raymond Woman Missing

A woman posted the following message and picture on Facebook:

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Meet Mississippi's Miss Amazing Junior Teen

UMMC issued the following statement.

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Sunday, January 27, 2019

Coco With the PoPo

Coming soon:

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Marvel Isn't So Marvelous

Bill Maher gores yet another sacred cow: Comic book movies.  It's about time someone took on the Marvel Universe.  Enjoy.

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Happy Birthday to KIM Waaaaade

It's the knucklehead's birthday today. Feel free to wish him a one step closer to the grass day. 

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Sunday Morning Sermon

Enjoy this 1986 sermon from the late Dr. Frank Pollard (First Baptist, Jackson) as he preached through a cold.

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Bill Crawford: High School Market-Based Testing Makes Sense

Rep. Tom Miles of Forest is on to something. With regard to tests required for high school graduation, he wants to move from an education bureaucracy based approach to a market based approach.

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Saturday, January 26, 2019

MDOC Lockdown

The Mississippi Department of Corrections issued the following statement. 

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Saturday Night at the Fights, Sort of.

If you want to see some boxing smack at its best, check out this video of Muhammad Ali and Cus D'amato.  They analyze past greats such as Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey.  D'amato dissects Ali's style and tells him what the game plan would be to beat him. Mind you, this took place before the great fights of the 1970's and pretty much foretold what Frazier would do.  Enjoy.

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Friday, January 25, 2019

Flashback Friday

Today's edition of Flashback Friday continues to remind readers at who said what when the vote for higher taxes to fund the construction of the Jackson Convention Center was on the table. JJ reported earlier this month that the convention center suffered an operating loss of $1.4 million in 2018 and has already lost nearly $300,000 just a few months into FY 2019. The Capital City sharecroppers promise it would generate $40 million in revenue and create 700 jobs when they told us to vote for higher taxes. Enjoy reading these past article. 

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USA Today: Mississippi is Sober

USA Today ranked the states in terms of um, drunkedness.  Fortunately or unfortunately, Mississippi ranked 46, just behind Utah, Tennessee, West Virginia, and Alabama. 

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Butler Snow Asks Judge to Dismiss SEC Complaint in Lamar Adams Case

Butler Snow asked a federal judge to dismiss a receiver's complaint against the firm in the Lamar Adams case.  The Ridgeland law firm issued the following press release:

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Thursday, January 24, 2019

Shootout in Rankin County

Update #2: Joseph Zattoni was arrested and charged with capital murder in the death of Stoney Qualls. 

Update #1: MBI cancels Qualls Silver Alert .

A Rankin County deputy shot a man suspected in the disappearance of Stoney Qualls this evening.  The shooting took place on Moncure Road in Rankin County.

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Holes in the Road!

Best campaign ad we've seen in a long time.

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Burton Suffers Stroke


State Senator Terry Burton suffered a stroke. He is under medical care. 

Sent from my BlackBerry Keyone



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AG Recovers $26 Million in Epps Scandal

Attorney General Jim Hood issued the following statement.

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Murder in Clinton

The Clinton Police Department issued the following statement.

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Measles Outbreak in Oregon

Looks like our know-nothing friends who oppose vaccines are paying a price in Oregon.The Salt Lake Tribune reported:

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Same Ole, Same Ole

The Waffle House on McDowell Road got robbed yet again.  JPD tweeted:

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The Kid Is All Right

Some little boys collect matchbox cars.  Others make models of cars.  One little boy set his heart upon collecting car emblems so he did what every polite young man should do: he simply asked.  Popular Mechanics reported:

Credit: Popular Mechanics

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Silver Alert

The Mississippi Bureau of Investigation issued the following alert.

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Media Massacre

Today was a bloodbath for the media as newsrooms were decimated across the country. The Poynter website reported:

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Wednesday, January 23, 2019

All Too True

The gang at It's a Southern Thing tackled email spam in their latest sketch:

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Coroner: Homicide in Robinson Death

Update: Family has retained Sweet & Associates.  

Hinds County Coroner Sharon Grisham-Stewart ruled that the death of 61 year-old George Robinson was a homicide.

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Animal Health Board Employee Accused of Embezzlement

State Auditor Shad White issued the following press release.

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Frustrated Father Complains to City Council after Deadly Pit Bull Attack

A Northeast Jackson homeowner complained to the City Council last night about an animal control officer's refusal to seize three pit bulls after they jumped his fence, killed his pug, and attacked his family.

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DPS Repaying Feds for Misuse of DUI Grants

The state of Mississippi has repaid $1.3 million of DUI grants to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration.  NHTSA ordered the Department of Public Safety to repay $7 million in DUI enforcement grants after it determined DPS mismanaged the funds. 

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Sid Salter: Remembering Ed Perry

State Rep. Felix Edwin “Stump” Perry was one of the most effective legislators in the long history of the Mississippi House, but it was the style with which Ed carried out his legislative duties that made Ed’s passing last week at age 76 statewide news.

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Tuesday, January 22, 2019

Rural Broadband Bill Rushed for Senate Vote

Update (1/23/19): Bill passes Senate without amendment. 

Steve Wilson reported on the Mississippi Center for Public Policy's website:

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Classy!

Not Safe For Work, Kids, or Ole Miss Fans. 

Cue up the Internet outrage as a Saturday Night Live writer tweeted a rather provocative offer:

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First DPS, Now MDOC Wants to Hide

Uh-oh.  The MDOC Commissioner went complaining to the legislature that the public records laws are too tough.  The Clarion-Ledger reported last week:

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Monday, January 21, 2019

Rankin Chase Ends in Madison County

Rankin County Sheriff Bryan Bailey issued the following statement.

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AG: County Can't Give Money to Jackson Zoo.

Money woes continued for the struggling Jackson Zoo as the Attorney General refused to approve a donation from Hinds County. 

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Matchbook Monday

Welcome to another edition of Matchbook Monday. Feel free to add your stories or any information about them in the comments section as you enjoy these blasts from the past. Readers can email copies of any old matchbooks to kingfish1935@gmail.com.

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Want to Do a Good Deed?

Want to help a furloughed federal worker? The Jackson Foodies and Jeff Good's crew are offering a way to do so.  Mr. Good posted this message on Facebook yesterday:

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Sunday, January 20, 2019

Clarion-Ledger: Rebirth or Retrench?

More changes are coming to the Clarion-Ledger.  Executive Editor Samuel Hall announced today:

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When the Light Shines

If you can't make it to church this morning, enjoy this sermon presented by the late Dr. Frank Pollard.  He  preached from Matthew 5:17-48 in this 1990 sermon. 

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Bill Crawford: Snyder & Foster Open Door to Constructive Conservatism

There is political language used to divide us. There is political language used to unite us.

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Saturday, January 19, 2019

Desecration in Canton

The Veteran's Memorial in Canton Cemetery was vandalized last night.  This post appeared on several Madison County community pages.


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Famous For Being Famous

Want to see where the culture is going? Or should we say where it already is? Check out the Netflix movie of the day:

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Friday, January 18, 2019

The City Has a Plan

The Lumumba Administration presented its new crime-fighting plan to the Jackson City Council today.

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Baby Survivor Turns 1


UMMC issued the following press release.

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DPS Doesn't Like to Lose

Never let it be said Commissioner Crybaby is a quitter.  The Mississippi Department of Public Safety fought State Representative Joel Bomgar over a public records request.  DPS denied his request but Mr. Bomgar appealed to the Ethics Commission.  The Commission ruled in the State Representative's favor and fined two DPS attorneys $100 each. However, Commissioner Marshall Fisher doesn't take such losses lightly but instead appealed the decision to Hinds County Chancery Court.  DPS is the only government agency to ever appeal a public records ruling by the Mississippi Ethics Commission to Chancery Court. 

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Flashback Friday: $40 Mill & a Job

Today's edition of Flashback Friday continues to take a look at who said what when it was time to vote for higher taxes to fund the construction of the Jackson Convention Center.   JJ reported last week that the convention center had an operating loss of  $1.4 million per year* and has already lost nearly $300,000 just a few months into the new fiscal year. Earlier post with financial statements. The Capital City sharecroppers promise it would generate $40 million in revenue and create 700 jobs when they told us to vote for higher taxes.  Check out these past editorials and articles.

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Thursday, January 17, 2019

Is It the End for the Dekes?

The National Organization is pulling the plugs on the Dekes at LSU.

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Something's Happening at the Zoo

It appears Mayor Chokwe Antar Lumumba has chosen a new company to operate the Jackson Zoo. Posted on the agenda for next week's meeting of the Jackson City Council:

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Clinton Man Charged with Manslaughter

Rankin County Sheriff Bryan Bailey issued the following statement.

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Four in One Day

JPD issued the following statements. 

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Nissan Cutting Canton Production

Nissan is cutting shifts at the Canton plant. A memo sent to suppliers stated:

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DPS Reversed on Trooper Firing

The Employee Appeals Committee of the State Personnel Board reinstated a State Trooper who was fired for alleged domestic violence.  DPS Commissioner Marshall Fisher complained about the decision at a Legislative hearing last week:

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Awwww.....

Rough day yesterday.  4 homicides, accusations of police brutality, and of course the usual political drama at the Capitol.  Time to take a break and warm up your hearts.

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Wednesday, January 16, 2019

Turmoil at JPD

Allegations of police misconduct rocked JPD today.  These posts appeared on Facebook this morning.

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Stamps for PSC Commish

Jackson Ward 4 Councilman DeKeither Stamps is running for the Public Service Commission.  He announced on Facebook:

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Homicide in Jackson

JPD issued the following statement. 

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House Passes Rural Broadband Bill

Speakah of the House Phillip Gunn issued the following statement.

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Butler Snow Up for National Award

Butler Snow is on the short list for a "Law Firm of the Year" award.  The Mississippi Business Journal reported yesterday:

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Sid Salter: Book Preserves State's Reaction to "Integrate at Once" Court Order

School desegregation in Mississippi was a tough, messy and often a very dangerous business.

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Tuesday, January 15, 2019

Blast from the Past

Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig.  Nuff said.

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Dental School Offers Freek Week of Dental Care

UMMC issued the following statement.

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Accused Preacher Killer Received a Blessing

JPD made a second arrest in the murder of Reverend Anthony Longino.  JPD stated in a press release:

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Electric Co-ops & Lord Snow Fight Member Refunds

Are electric power associations overcharging their members? Tis the question asked in a war waged in court between several Mississippi electric cooperatives and their members. The members keep winning but the electric power associations keep appealing. 

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Monday, January 14, 2019

GOT Tease

April is coming so HBO released a teaser video last night.

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Fitch Announces A.G. Run

State Treasurer and Master of Coin Lynn Fitch issued the following statement.

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Gannett For Sale?

Gannett may be on the auction block.  The Wall Street Chronicle reported today:

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Arrest made in Wal-mart Murder

JPD issued the following statement. 

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Sanders SPEAKS!!!

Enoch is looking a little old.  Might be slowing down. 

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Suspect Arrested, Confesses in Church Murder

JPD issued the following statement.

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Best Things in Life Worth the Wait

UMMC issued the following press release.

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Sunday, January 13, 2019

Mayor Speaks on Murders

Update (1/13/19): Suspects arrested in both murders. More to follow.

Jackson Mayor Chokwe Antar Lumumba issued the following statement. 

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Lock & Load! Murder Suspects at Large (Updated)

Crime Update (9:15 PM): Man was shot to death in the parking lot of the South Jackson Walmart tonight on Greenway Drive off Hwy 18.  

Update (3:15 PM): JPD is questioning a person of interest.  He is 14 years old.  Deceased Pastor's name is Anthony Longino. 

JPD tweeted the following statements. 

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Waffle House Robbed

JPD issued the following statement Friday night.

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Sunday Morning Sermon

If you can't make it to church this morning, enjoy this 1990 sermon presented by the late Dr. Frank Pollard.

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Bill Crawford: Best Financial Shape Ever for MS?

State revenue collections are running ahead of target. The state rainy day fund and other reserves are full of cash. Agency budget cuts appear to be behind us. Pointing to all this, Lt. Gov. Tate Reeves said "Mississippi is in our best financial and fiscal shape in our history." Speaker of the House Philip Gunn chimed in saying, "This is the result of conservative practices over the last seven years." That seven years covers the tenure of Reeves, Gunn and Gov. Phil Bryant in their current leadership positions.

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Saturday, January 12, 2019

When Goff Was Off

Nothing like a good ole fashioned prank...

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James Tulp: Trump Shouldn't Build the Wall Because of...Climate Change?

It is becoming increasingly likely that Trump will have to declare a national emergency and use the military to build the wall. Some Republicans don't like that.

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Commissioner Cries to Legislature.

Mississippi Department of Public Safety Commissioner Marshall Fisher whined to the legislature Thursday about alleged unfair treatment from the State Personnel Board.  The Commish thinks he has the right to be a dictator and fire anyone who catches his ire, the truth be damned.  Unfortunately, a Clarion-Ledger reporter,  Giacomo Bologna, fell for his act hook, line, and sinker.  Mr. Bologna reported:

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Once Upon a Time....

Morgan Freeman appeared on The Electric Company.  Enjoy the videos posted below.

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Friday, January 11, 2019

Flashback Friday: Convention Center

$40 million and a job.  Actually, 700 jobs.  Capital City sharecropping, 21st century style. That was the promise of the Jackson Convention Center.  Today's edition of Flashback Friday will begin to take a look at how the Jackson Convention Center came to be.   See for yourself.

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Domestic Violence Rears Its Ugly Head Today

People went damn nuts in Jackson today.  Just sickening.  JPD issued the following statements.

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Ridgeland Darwin Award Attempt Fails

The Ridgeland Police Department released the following statement and video.

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Visit Jackson Tries to Bail out Convention Center

Visit Jackson agreed to contribute $450,000 to the Jackson Convention Center as its fortunes continued to worsen.  The Convention Center lost $1.4 million in FY 2018 and continued to lose money through the end of the year.


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Tollifon Becomef Pro-Tem

Leftenent Governor Tate Reevef iffued the following ftatement.

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Thursday, January 10, 2019

Bully, Bully

Correction: Public Notice published three weeks ago. 

The Board of Dental Examiners, the Grand Poobahs who regulate the dental profession in Mississippi, are holding a work session on a Saturday. You read that correctly.  The Board if going to discuss making changes to several regulations but will do so on the weekend.    Meanwhile, check out how the Board treats dentists who dare to come before the Board and say their peace.

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Where's Wallace?

Edwards Mayor Marcus Wallace is running for MDOT Central Commissioner.  The Madison County resident posted on Facebook:

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Hughes Calls on Hilbert to Resign

This post is written by and paid for by the Jay Hughes for Lieutenant Governor campaign.

Long-time Mississippi Secretary of State, Delbert Hosemann, announced Wednesday that he is running for Lieutenant Governor. His opponent in the highly contested race for the second highest elected position in the state, Jay Hughes (D-Lafayette), has now formally asked him to resign from his current office due to the fact that he will be serving as the Chief Elections Officer with the authority of election oversight, and disputes and irregularities related to them.

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FBI Still Investigating Capitol Nooses

The FBI is investigating the placement of several nooses and signs on the Capitol grounds on the day before the November 27, 2018 Senate election.   JJ obtained a copy of the police report.  It is posted below.

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Wednesday, January 9, 2019

Oops!

Time for some humor.  A Uber driver in Baltimore told a San Diego running back the Ravens would win - without realizing who his fare was.

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Drive-by Kills One

JPD issued the following statement. 

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Gowan Blessed a Bank Robber

Here is another blessing from the Hinds County criminal justice system.  Remember Elijah Harris? He tried to rob a bank in Clinton and did it with a smile.

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Jailbird!

Lamar Adams began serving his 235-month sentence this week at a federal prison in Arkansas.

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Get Well Cards Needed!

Don't know of there is a Gofundmepage set up but this fella needs your cards and prayers while he is in the hospital.

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Wilbert Running for Lieutenant Governor

Secretary of State Gibbit Hosemann issued the following statement.

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Police Chase Ends in Shooting

A Richland police chase into Jackson ended in a shooting of the suspect Saturday night.  WAPT reported:

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Sid Salter on Turning 60

Longevity runs in my family on both sides. My father lived to a few weeks shy of 76 years. My mom made it 82 years. My grandmothers lived to be 93 and 101 respectively. One grandfather died at 76 and the other at 81.  Those numbers tend to be encouraging as I celebrate my 60th birthday this week – or at least with no scientific fact to support my belief, I choose to be encouraged by them. But those numbers represent the up side of my realities.

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Tuesday, January 8, 2019

Sheriff Mason Wants Another Term

Hinds County Sheriff Victor Mason announced on Facebook he will run for re-election this year. The announcement is posted below.

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Burton Resigns Leadership Position


State Senator Terry Burton (R-JD Stiller) resigned his position of Pro-Tem of the Senate.  The Senate has not yet chosen a successor.  He also said he will not seek re-election

Sent from my BlackBerry Keyone Black Edition.

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It's Foster v. Tate

State Representative Robert Foster qualified to run for Governor this morning at Mississippi Republican Party headquarters in Jackson. Looks like we got us a steel-cage, no rules, loser leave town match in August.  See for yourself below .

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We're Going to Bring You the Power!

Since the electric cooperatives of Mississippi are attempting to flex some muscle as they try to bring broadband internet service to rural Mississippi, JJ took a quick peek at their tax returns.  JJ occasionally posts the 990's of Mississippi non-profit organizations.  The co-ops get their turn at bat in this post. 

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Jackson Gets $1 Million for Oneline Project

Jackson Mayor Chokwe Antar Lumumba issued the following press release. 

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Monday, January 7, 2019

Baker Runs for A.G.

State Representative Marcus Baker issued the following statement. 

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Here They Come

It should come as no surprise that State Senator Terry Burton's 2nd Offense DUI arrest would not go unnoticed in his district. Tyler McCaughn issued the following statement.

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Matchbook Monday

Welcome to another edition of Matchbook Monday. Feel free to add your stories or any information about them in the comments section as you enjoy these blasts from the past. Readers can email copies of any old matchbooks to kingfish1935@gmail.com.

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Pit Bull Pack Attack in Northeast Jackson

A pack of three pit bulls jumped into a Northeast Jackson resident's back yard, killed a small dog, and then chased the family.  Unfortunately, the JPD animal control officer refused to seize the dogs but instead returned them to the owner.  Good boy!

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Sunday, January 6, 2019

Bill Crawford: Needed: Brain Power

“Area’s with brain power have a competitive advantage over other areas,” I researched and wrote in a column 16 years ago. “Brain power is the gold of the 21st Century in America.”

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FOOD FIGHT!!! (Literally)

A fight broke out at the Food Depot on Northside Drive in Jackson last night.  The store was forced to close early.  It is not known if JPD arrested anyone.  The video of the fight is posted below. 

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Sunday Morning Sermon

He believes in you even when you don't believe in yourself is the message of today's sermon presented by the late Dr. Frank Pollard.  If you can't make it to church this morning, enjoy this sermon.  Dr. Pollard preached from Matthew 5:13-16 in this 1990 sermon.

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Saturday, January 5, 2019

Child Kidnapped, Suspect Shoots at Police

JPD issued the following statement.

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The Apprentice: Dark Side Version

Came across this gem of a fan-produced Star Wars short.  Pretty good production value and fleshed out the Darth Maul storyline a little.  Hell, it told the story of Maul better than did Lucas. 

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Friday, January 4, 2019

Vance Wants the Big Star

Richard Spooner, Les Tannehill, Lee Vance, and Sheriff Victor Mason qualified to run for Hinds County Sheriff. So much for March 1. 

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Rez Discharge Increased

The Pearl River Valley Water Supply District issued the following statement.

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Country Saviors or Crony Capitalists?

Will rural Mississippi finally get better internet access? There are many pleasures to be gained from enjoying the pastoral life.  Unfortunately, a bane of such living is the lack of broadband internet access in much of Mississippi.  Living in the sticks too often means just that - living in the sticks away from copper and fiber.  Mississippi electric coops will try to get permission from the legislature this year to provide internet service to "underserved" areas in Mississippi.  Journeyman reporter Bobby Harrison reported in Mississippi Today recently:

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Thursday, January 3, 2019

Let's Get Ready to Ruuuumble!!!

The Silly Season is upon us as candidates began qualifying this week.  The Governor's race, for some strange reason, brought to mind this video.

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Tate Announces Run for Governor

Leftenant Governor Tate Reeves issued the following press release.

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What is Popular on Waitr in Jackson?

The Waitr app has taken the Jackson restaurant scene by storm.  The restaurant delivery app is popular in the Jackson area.  What do Jacksonians love to order?

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Driver of Flipped Bus Charged w/DUI

JPD issued the following statement.

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Man Severely Injured in Eagle Lake Hunting Accident

A tragic hunting accident took place last week at Eagle Lake. Although no one was killed, doctors were forced to amputate part of Matt Branch's leg after it was shot by a shotgun.  WBRZ (Baton Rouge) reported:

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Wednesday, January 2, 2019

Bus Flips, Passengers Rescued

A daring rescue took place at the on-ramp of Pascagoula Street and I-55 where a Greyhound bus overturned on it's side.  Watch first responders rescued the trapped passengers in the video posted below.

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Will Johnny Paint #73 Black?

Madison resident Johnny Black, III posted this message on Facebook.

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PRVWSD to Discharge More H2O

The Pearl River Valley Water Supply District issued the following statement.

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5 Die on State Highways During NY Holiday

The Mississippi Highway Patrol issued the following statement. 

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Oops!

Somebody thought introducing a  bulldog to a longhorn was a good idea. What could possibly go wrong?

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Sid Salter: Will Miss. Lose Congressional Clout?

During the 2018 federal election cycle, The New York Times, The Washington ____ and other national news organizations examined the question of what they saw as Mississippi’s declining clout on Capitol Hill.
Clearly, the 2018 retirement of 45-year veteran Republican U.S. Sen. Thad Cochran – who held the vastly influential post of Senate Appropriations Committee chairman – represents a tremendous loss of clout for the state. Republicans and Democrats alike statewide recognize that fact.

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Top Posts of 2018

JJ is turning over a new leaf and posting below the top ten posts of 2018.  They are ranked according to the traffic generated for each post. JJ thought you might like to know what you liked to read on this website before we move into the new year. 

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2016 Hottest Reporter Poll

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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