Jackson Ward 4 Councilman DeKeither Stamps was in rare form last night on WMPR. Hell, I'm not going to deprive you of your fun by giving away what he said. Just listen at 3:20 for 90 seconds or so and then at 16:50 for a couple of minutes. You simply can not make this up.
Remember, he gets to vote on a $300 million budget every year.
Friday, August 25, 2017
Fiction stranger than fiction
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
55 comments:
Ok, I agree with Councilman Stamps about the need to outlaw Uber and Lyft. They are evil corporations of the one-percenters that are only trying to reach into our pocket books and undercut our local businesses. But the "native African Americans" talk is skraight up crazy. Not sure if he is being serious or not.
Uber and Lyft were able to be because of the price and the quality of the taxi cab services. My cab ride shouldn't cost more than my bar tab.
Well this just proves that the Mississippi African Americans should take back the land by any means necessary. It was theirs to begin with. Why haven't I know of this before?? It all makes sense now. Even that they were forced to march up the Natchez Trace to Oklahoma during the Trail of Tears. They didn't teach us that part in Mississippi History. Must be a conspiracy by the white man to keep them from their natural homeland rights. Could he please publish all these correct histories so that we may learn the truth?
Taxis belong to black people?
Uber and lyft are great!
They are cheap and effective.
But Uber and lyft haven't made a dime.
They wish to gut cabs and then raise their prices.
It's predatory conduct which we idly sat by and watched happen.
I'm guilty....I love it.
But when the cabs are gone....Uber will raise prices and then there will be no competition.
Anti trust laws will soon be enforced as what stamps says continues.
“Drivers had a feeling they were making money, but when we actually did the math with them, some of them came down to hourly earnings that were below minimum wage,” said Katie Wells, a visiting scholar at George Washington University who is studying the working lives of Uber drivers.
Low Wages, High Stress: D.C. Researchers Delve Into The Lives Of Uber Drivers
Up the Natchez Trace to Oklahoma.
I'm tired of it! when are we gonna say thats it! we need to bring Jackson back to its peak. We need to crack down on crime, ask businesses like cspire, butler snow and Toyota to come to the city of Jackson and incorporate surrounding suburban cities so we can get the red vote and improve our infrastructure, budget and most of all or public school systems! Im so tired of this Mississippi flag talk we have bigger problems than that
By his thoughts, he needs to petition McDonalds to take the McRib off the menu because they are taking it away from his peoples plate.
http://youtu.be/oYvWQm8UD0c
So the wild reimagining of American history is absurd, I'll give you that. But what about his stance on Uber and Lyft is laughable? That strikes me as a pretty valid point. Concentrated capital is always finding new ways to make a percentage, and it is constantly squeezing out smaller competitors. If you doubt this phenomenon, or aren't worried about its effects, then you need to reconsider.
Same Uber cheerleaders bash Walmart's impact on local business.
Wow! First anti-free market, then a fantastic reimagining of history that allows contemporary African-Americans to see themselves as descendants not of slaves but of a Mississippi valley tribe of undaunted African explorers.
This guy needs to be outed in the media beyond JJ. Who will take him on?
What's the history of the relationship, if any, between Stamps and the Mayor?
I'm with him as far as income inequality, which has reached crisis levels, but there's no conspiracy involved. The rich get richer because they have a safety net allowing them to take unusual risks. Fine, but they need to pay more taxes, not less.
He erraborated on his granddaddy saying that his people were native African American whose people were here thousands of years before Christopher Columbus.
And I really hate to think that I can't sell my commercial property in Jackson because it's in Jackson and my property taxes support JPS. The same JPS that taught Keifer Sutherland, I mean Stampses, how to speak.
And it might even be the same teachers that teach the SEC football players how to speak at News Comfrensises. But, then again they might be worried about that chopital oppression Harvey hitting the black parts of Houston and Galbitson, Texas
Wow! First anti-free market, then a fantastic reimagining of history that allows contemporary African-Americans to see themselves as descendants not of slaves but of a Mississippi valley tribe of undaunted African explorers.
This guy needs to be outed in the media beyond JJ. Who will take him on?
That's a joke, right?
1. The C-L and other conventional media don't care; and
2. His idiot constituents are dumb enough to believe it.
He's golden.
So according to him, poor black people should be forced to ride in more expensive cabs with slower service. I would think inner city folks that depend on cabs would love Uber.
ROFLMAO
BabyChok ran a campaign harping about salary bloat in the Yarber administration and now he's paying two positions +31% and +23.5% MORE than Yarber paid the comparable staffers!
I don't mind paying decent comp if the resumes support it and heaven knows our city government could use some talent. However, there is a problem paying high salaries to clowns such as Crisler and McCoy.
Top-heavy administrations
On the last question about job creation in the city, Lumumba took the opportunity to question the salaries in Yarber's administration, calling it "top heavy."
The son of late Mayor Chokwe Lumumba, who served from 2013 to 2014, has discussed reorganizing city government since his candidacy announcement last May.
"If we're concerned about the difficult decisions that we have to make in terms of furloughs of city employees, the first thing we can start to do is reduce a top-heavy administration. You can't feel too bad when you're paying the highest salaries the city has ever seen in your administration. So you have to make those adjustments," Lumumba said.
The 'lady' at the beginning said she has a White supremacist coming to her house.
Does she mean the cable guy or the mail man??
You can't make up that kind of stupid.
So, if you are one of the "Native African Americans" (or whatever he calls himself), and you are not a descendant of slaves, does that mean you would not be entitled to the reparations so many bitch and moan about?
What the hell is a 'native African American'? These clowns want to claim to be Africans and now they want to claim not to be.
Maybe I'll run into a native European Mexican if I venture outa my hood.
No more African American. That is offensive. They desire to be called African Native American American
I'm a white Jew and want reparations for being a slave of the Pharaoh.
Oh, I like Dekeither. I really do.
But I think he misunderstood Granddaddy. He could possibly have a mix of Native American and African American heritage, and the Native side of the family originated here.
Before we beat up the blacks for electing a person who has no idea how to run anything, remember it was the whites who elected Trump.
Nikita Khrushchev was right.
I don't believe these idiots' mamas simply dropped them on their heads when they were babies; I believe they literally bounced them again and again as in a basketball game!
Oh, Heaven forbid someone should dip they fingers in, and destabilize Jackson's glorious Taxicab Industry.
Second to Jackson's streets, the taxis are the most astonishing thing about the city. Coupled WITH the condition of the streets, Jackson's taxis offer an experience that people would normally have to travel to exotic lands (like Haiti or El Salvador), to experience.
Actually it was the black voters who didn't turnout to vote who elected Trump..
Hold my scotch just for a second.... I'm a native western European American Indian with no American native African Indonesian anatartican descent. I'm so ashamed of my white tannish partly darkish skin from where I was Lilly white but the Romans who invaded Ireland with their Olive Skin mated with my Scottish side and floated over and mated with my Native American side who by the way (at this point my skin is nutmeg), had already been by infiltrated a Prince Modac of Wales in 1152 in North Alabama who was a red head (yes, he was here 300 years before Columbus), but my Scandinavian side still longs to have a tan which by the way I can't because I'm not dark enough I will get skin cancer. Ugh..... I'm so confused!!! Oh, lets not forget that 1/3 of us have Blood from Ghangus Khan...... oh you guys!
Wonderful!!!
You can't fix stupid.
Mr. Stamps demonstrates that you can't fix gullible, either.
God help us.
I've never really followed Mista Da'keetha.
I guess his "konstichunts" are just as ignorant as those in Stoke's ward.
But if he ever needs a part time job, I'm sure the History Channel would hire him as an expert on the "Ancient Aliens" series.
Up the Trace to Oklahoma . . . laughing my ass off.
You would be surprised but there are a lot of black history revisionists. It's becoming main stream, y'all!!!
Ok, this is all funny until it's not! African Revisionist History has been around for a while and is becoming more and more mainstream. I remember seeing pre-Trump Ben Carson endorsing a video where Egyptian Pharaohs were originally black until the evil lighter-skinned brown man took over.
This is why it is important to keep statues and flags and other historical symbols. If you don't, history will be re-written. Keep in mind, that this is an elected official who is saying that the US was populated with African explorers until genocide wiped them out.
Isn't this insulting to Africans who were brought here against their will? He almost makes them seem more subservient and less honorable ancestors!?!?
I am not a socialist, marxist, communist or whatever by any means, but I do sympathize with being outmoded by a few technocrats in some other part of the world. I dare to say that technology has provided at least three evils for every one good, it is just unfortunate that we put blinders on in order to enjoy the one good.
p.s. if you think i'm crazy, read about what changes are coming for Whole Foods now that the FTC has granted Amazon the power to go forward with the acquisition.
For all the anti-Trumpers, I haven't voted GOP since 1992. I plan to vote for Trump next time. The egregious errors that CNN, CBS, NBC etc., delight in reporting pale in comparison to the blunders of Obama which the same crowd ignores.
You think Trump sticks his foot in his mouth? How about the less reported statements by Hillary, Biden, Warren, et al?
Similar level of stupid. How did the place not break out in laughter?
https://youtu.be/v7XXVLKWd3Q
On Facebook this morning, I referred to Stamps mention of 'Native African Americans' and got bounced into time out.
wow... this guy can really re-write history. and geography. maybe they can fix him up with a 200,000$ a year professor ship at jackson state. by the way there is nothing in the history of what is now mississippi and the united states, that black africans were ever here prior to the trans atlantic slavve trade. the natchez trace runs from natchez mississippi to Nashville tennessee . it does not pass through what is now oklahoma..this clown just makes it up as he goes along .
Facebook is a total waste of time.
In Stamps' defense, we live in a wikipedia world:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Afrocentrism#Pre-Columbian_Africa-Americas_theories
Ace Hardware is an owner cooperative, with a centralized marketing operation. Your Ace hardware places are typically owned by local people.
We have a president who thinks Nazis are good people, and that vaccines cause autism. Alex Jones has a big audience. Goop somehow has an audience. People of all sorts post fake eclipse photos to social media. It's hardly surprising that an obscure city council person might believe junk of this sort, in this environment.
If BabyChok and Akuno can't make stuff up out of thin air well so can Stamps too.
12:41, what the hell does Ace Hardware have to do with this? Really?
Guess you didn't bother to listen to the audio, did you, 1:25.
God help us.
This is the dumbest shit I've ever heard. Black and white people amaze me. Just because you say it, doesn't make it so. WTF- let's just re-write history because our grandparents told us so? BS-Stamps, as your people would say-You is crazy. Not only are you crazy, you're an uneducated liar. Regarding Uber and Lyft-cab service in Jackson is terrible. Not only does the service suck, it's crazy expensive. We need Uber and Lyft. Competition is good. Options are good. Now, Mr. Stamps-who do you think drives for Uber and Lyft? A New Yorker? No dumbass. Local people drive for these companies. The money goes in local pockets. Uggghh. I hate the ignorance in this state on all sides-black, white, democrats, republicans, etc.
what stamps has going for him is the millions of people in this country that believe that you cannot be on radio , tv, internet, or hold elected office unless you are brilliant.
10:26 Fortunately Mr. Trump is dispelling that myth every day.
Sad but there are many people who do not know any better than he does.
Might have something to do with the people who are destroying history.
12:58 You cannot destroy history. You can lie about it. But you cannot destroy
it. Whether you lie about it or not, you must still live with the consequences created by a historic fact. Monuments are not history, only efforts to emphasize someone's point of view.
Just imagine how a person with this lack of intelligence and education could be an elected official? If this is the best the area could provide no wonder Jackson is in such a piss poor shape.
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