Thursday, July 20, 2017

Priester challenges Pamela Anderson

Jackson Ward 2 City Councilman Melvin Priester, Jr. issued this challenge to The Pamela Anderson and PETA on his Facebook page:

 If you are genuine in your concern about the people of "America's Fattest City," if you genuinely care about actually promoting vegetarianism in Mississippi, there is in fact something you can do that might actually help.
The state's original (and perhaps only) vegetarian restaurant is on the verge of closing.

From your challenge to our city, you are clearly aware of where I speak: Rainbow Natural Grocery Cooperative
Rainbow and the High-Noon Cafe are in a building that needs major repairs due to flooding issues. Rainbow has single handedly done more to help the health of Mississippians and promote veganism and vegetarianism than you can know. If Rainbow closes, living the vegan lifestyle in central Mississippi becomes an order of magnitude harder.
According to your 2016 Financial statement, you had 67 million in revenue versus 51 million in expenses.

You have the means. We don't.

Do more than talk. Actually help your cause in Mississippi by supporting Rainbow Natural Grocery Cooperative and the City of Jackson by making sure we don't lose our only true vegetarian/vegan restaurant.

Melvin Priester,
Jackson City Council

p.s. Of all the Casablancas ever made, Barb Wire is definitely in the top 10.



KaptKangaroo said...

Hey Melvin, I assume you are asking her to "invest" and retain a portion of the business as collateral until her "investment" is returned? Or are you flat out asking for a handout.

I for one, will give of myself and join Mr. Antar and go vegan for a month. My body could use it!

Anonymous said...

Great misdirection.

City screws up the drainage causing irreparable harm to Rainbow that the City of Jackson won't resolve and Priester asks for a bailout.

Anonymous said...

Boom. Good job Melvin.

Anonymous said...

I'll also challenge her and anyone else to eat the healthiest, most organic, non GMO food on the planet that is grown right here in Mississippi, and I will personally invite anyone who wishes to harvest said food on a hunting or fishing trip to do it. #pamcanbringtheflotationdevices

Mr. Toad said...

Wait a minute, didn't Ms. Anderson issue her challenge to the Honorable Mayor? Again, here is poor little Mel (as he calls himself in his limited circle) interjecting himself into someone else's challenge. Melvin, when you graduate to the status Mayor, then you can cavort with DD-list celebrities, you bootless, dizzy-eyed flap-dragon.

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised he hasn't started a municipal gofundme page.

Anonymous said...

Hey Pam, got some good composting going on here in Jackbekistan.

Anonymous said...

You know what else is unhealthy Pam? Hep C.

Anonymous said...

I love it! I enjoy pointing out to PETA folks that they are wearing leather or synthetics ( which contribute to the chemical pollution destroying habitats).
Of course, all but two of those commenting thus far suffer from the same sort of emotionalism and extremism as Ms. Anderson.

Anonymous said...

Oh Mr. Toad, you make me smile.
" you bootless, dizzy-eyed flap-dragon. ."

Anonymous said...

Not to split hairs, but vegan and vegetarian "vegetarianism" are separate philosophies. Just satin'!

Anonymous said...

Very good sentiment Melvin. Why should the city of Jackson Mississippi, which most Hollywood types wouldn't piss on if it was burning jump to the whim of some B-list celebrity who represents one of the most flaky organizations in existence. What is she contributing besides useless advice. Vegan is not going to make a dent in the obesity rate in Mississippi. The mayor should have declined or suggested a more realistic stunt to help battle this real problem in Mississippi. Vegan is so extreme his actions will amount to no more than a stupid publicity stunt for PETA and a waste of energy he could have used working for a desperate city.

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Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).

Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.

In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS