Friday, February 9, 2024

Funny of the Day

 Hizzoner took a trip to the grocery story with JPD brass in tow.  Notice anything? 













wait for it......






49 comments:

Anonymous said...

What qualifies the mayor to wear a police uniform indicating he is law enforcement?

Anonymous said...

Not a good look for the mayor of a city to feel like he has to have armed guards and a bullet proof vest to wear to visit with the people. He looks scared.

Anonymous said...

What surprised me.....nothing but cuss words came out of my mouth when seeing him.

Anonymous said...

What is worse? He has the vest on backwards or that no one else knows the difference to be able to tell him?

Anonymous said...

He doesn't look like he is "freeing the land"

Anonymous said...

It's called fashion!!
That's a limited-edition Frank Melton throwback jersey.

Professionally_Sketchy_Guy said...

Didn't Jackson's last mayor get in deep shit for pretending to be a cop and running around in body armor with "police" on the front and back?

If you or I wore that vest in public we would catch a felony charge from those very same cops...

Anonymous said...

But the city is safe, as we've all heard the mayor say. Great comparison to Dukakis, thanks Kingfish.

Anonymous said...

frank melton is that you?

Anonymous said...

He is such a pompous ass. I can’t stand the sight of him.

He wouldn’t need the body armor and police protection if he’d been doing his fucking job for the last 6 years, instead of all the preening and showboating!

Worst. Mayor. EVER.

Anonymous said...

Zero self awareness! An absolute buffoon.

Anonymous said...

Crump can name Lumumba as a defendant in his next civil rights suit against the jacktown po po.

Anonymous said...

"If you or I wore that vest in public we would catch a felony charge from those very same cops..."

Actually you can wear garb that says "Police" on it. Miss. Code § 97-7-43 states that you must be attempting to, or passing yourself off as a cop/deputy etc. "Whoever falsely and willfully assumes or pretends to be an officer or employee acting under the authority of the State of Mississippi or any department, agency or officer thereof; or of any county, municipality or any other subdivision of the State of Mississippi, or of any department, agency or officer of such county, municipality or subdivision, shall be guilty of a misdemeanor and punished for each separate such offense by a fine of not more than five hundred dollars ($500.00) or by imprisonment of not more than six (6) months in jail, or by both such fine and imprisonment."

Anonymous said...

Lawd..I don't think Joe Biden has that much of an armed entourage when he goes slummin' for ice cream.

What fuckin' mayor of any US city wears a Kevlar police vest to a grocery store, surrounded by a goon squad that wouldn't know whether to shit or go blind if somebody popped a balloon over in the flower shop?

Anonymous said...

Hey, isn't that Capt Incompetence out on patrol?

Anonymous said...

This would be political suicide in other crime-ridden cities. For the mayor to don a ballistic vest while meeting with the citizens. But alas, it all comes down to the people who live in Jackson. They keep voting for this sort of thing. When you don't expect better or demand better, you keep what you have.

MFing POS Boy Mayor said...

He needs four officers protecting him to go to the market? He has said that there is only a PERCEPTION of crime in Jacktown. What a POS.

Your vest was on backwards, dumb ass!

fed up in Jackson said...

Wait, Jackson is safe?

Anonymous said...

Interesting. Can you imagine any of our Republican elected officials acting so pretentiously? The mayor epitomizes what is wrong with having Democrats in leadership positions in government.

Anonymous said...

He's done. What does he run on? Bringing more demise to Jackson?

Anonymous said...

Just putting on a show. That's all he's good for.

Anonymous said...

Mom jeans?

I saw his sorry ass holding court in Aladdin the other day, surrounded by his cronies and various other hangers-on. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

Anonymous said...

Wow! He refuses to talk about crime, yet he wears a ballistic vest to the grocery store? At least Melton had a reason to be fearful! And look at that command staff. They are so far up his rear they can't even see daylight. Where are the other commanders that usually follow him around like puppy dogs waiting on a treat?

Anonymous said...

Will get re-elected with 70% of the vote.

Anonymous said...

The comments on social media are so sad.
The number of people who defend the Mayor is appalling.
These idiots approve of this behavior and think anyone that points out the lunacy is racist.

Everytime I read such, I am thankful I moved years ago.
The majority voting block in Jackson are as sharp as a bowling ball. And they want this life.

Anonymous said...

@2:00. It’s not on backwards.

Anonymous said...

What a tool!

He relates so well to the average citizen in Jackson.

Anonymous said...

That's a life jacket. Kevlar vests don't come that small.

I can't wait for Stokes to see this!

Anonymous said...

@4:06 why didn’t you stand up and call his ass out? I can’t wait to be in a restaurant and him start spewing bs! I literally can’t wait! I’ll make the news with what I’d have to say! People with testicular fortitude need to call him on his BS to make any change. He’ll have to be scared of ridicule everywhere he goes before anything gets accomplished. As long as there are people listening to his drivel, the more he’ll keep spewing it.

Anonymous said...

He is a puppet for the Prime Minister.


https://uticainternationalembassy.website/home/meet-our-prime-minister

Anonymous said...

What a clown. What a dork.

Anonymous said...

Perception of a mayor right?

Anonymous said...

Great leadership, instilling trust and confidence in his command (city)…NOT! Used to seeing my leaders walk the streets of Baghdad in a soft cap while we were in full battle-rattle. And that Dukakis reversed CVC helmet video never gets old.

Anonymous said...

4:54, I don't think there are actually very many Lumumba supporters. It's just that the few he has are very loud.

Anonymous said...

The vest is on backwards. And I bet all the cops knew it.

Anonymous said...

"https://uticainternationalembassy.website/home/meet-our-prime-minister"

delusional lunatic.

Anonymous said...

I believe he has 5 police officers in tow.

Anonymous said...

Why!!!

Anonymous said...

Is Lumumbles even an adult? Sheesh, he looks like a child.

Anonymous said...

This is funny and sad.

Anonymous said...

@9:57 PM - Yep, five officers x 3 shifts, but they are short-handed, right? If called on it Chowke would claim that he receives "death threats" weekly from "ultra MAGA republicans," right?

Anonymous said...

At least melton did this stuff to deter crime in bad areas of Jackson. This goober is just going to the grocery store.

Anonymous said...

Shows how smart he is. In Jacktown you can easily get shot even trying to go to Kroger. Think about the one on I55 and see how many have been shot in the store and on the lot.

Anonymous said...

"Kevlar vests don't come that small" Now this made me laugh outloud.

Anonymous said...

Is the volume still turned up to 'Max', in the speakers over Self-Checkout - blasting Bubblegum music from the Seventies? Even if we still lived in Mississippi, I'd NEVER return to that particular Kroger.

Anonymous said...

Is there any solid proof that the Mayor actually has received kickbacks for City contracts? If so, please provide details.

Anonymous said...

If I knew ahead of time that I was going on that outing with the Mayor wearing that vest, I would suddenly had an emergency and went home the rest of the day!

Ain’t no way I’m making a spectacle of myself doing that shigity. Come on Mr Mayor the JPD look bad enough!

Anonymous said...

If Jackson is so safe, why wear a vest??!!

Anonymous said...

When Chalkline says there is only a perception of crime in Jackson, he understands perception is reality else he wouldn't feel the need to suit up in body armor and bring along a phalanx of police officers just to pick up a quart of milk on his way home.

And for whether he can be reelected, any constituency that would keep Bennie Thompson in office in perpetuity wouldn't hesitate voting again for Chalkline (Bennie's heir apparent, by the way).



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Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

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Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


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Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

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