Friday, March 23, 2018

Gov. Phil Bryant: Cindy Hyde-Smith will make us all proud

On Wednesday, I announced that I will appoint Mississippi Commissioner of Agriculture and Commerce Cindy Hyde-Smith to the U.S. Senate. She will replace U.S. Sen. Thad Cochran who recently announced that he will be retiring on April 1, after nearly 50 years of outstanding service and dedication to the people of Mississippi.


For many years, I have been impressed with how Cindy has worked tirelessly on behalf of the men and women in agriculture — Mississippi’s largest industry and a treasured way of life in our state. Her intellect, compassion, toughness and determination to get things done exemplify everything Mississippi needs in the U.S. Senate.

As I considered the decision to appoint a new U.S. senator, I carefully weighed the qualifications, experience, character and values of who would best represent our state in Washington. Knowing firsthand of Cindy’s conservative record, her integrity and most importantly, her dedication to her faith in God, I am confident she is the right choice for the job.

I can also tell you from experience that Cindy Hyde-Smith is a rock-solid conservative. When I was lieutenant governor and she served in the state Senate, she was the most reliable vote I had for conservative causes. As a state senator, she quickly became known as a passionate advocate of farmers and ranchers in Mississippi, serving as the chairman of the Agriculture Committee for eight years and as an influential member of numerous other committees.

Cindy led the fight to protect private property rights against eminent domain abuses and was a strong supporter of tort reform which ended lawsuit abuse in Mississippi, paving the way for more jobs and new businesses locating in Mississippi. She also supported fiscally conservative budget initiatives. When the recession hit America, Mississippi’s budget was deeply impacted. Cindy helped craft a balanced budget by cutting spending, not borrowing more money.

BIPEC, Mississippi’s largest pro-business organization, has consistently rated her as a “business champion.” Over her time in the Legislature, she was among the highest-rated senators on pro-business legislation. She has a strong social conservative voting record with a 100 percent pro-life rating, and she’s a lifetime member of the NRA.

Cindy also successfully carried the banner for the Republican Party in two statewide elections for Agriculture Commissioner and she’s demonstrated her appeal to voters by winning in an overwhelming fashion. That’s because Mississippians appreciate the good job she’s done in one of the most important positions in our state.

As agriculture commissioner, she modernized the Department of Agriculture and Commerce by being a strong leader who knew how to stay on budget and get results for our farmers and small businesses. Cindy led the fight to open foreign markets for American products to be sold overseas, and she fought for country-of-origin food labeling. According to the state Legislature, she ran a “model agency” based on performance and program effectiveness.

Cindy Hyde-Smith is also a longtime, strong supporter of President Donald Trump. She co-chaired the Trump Agriculture Policy Advisory Council during the presidential campaign. She has continued to work closely with the Trump administration, including participating in key White House meetings with Vice President Mike Pence and USDA Secretary Sonny Perdue regarding the benefits of the tax-cut legislation.

I know that once she’s sworn in as our next U.S. senator, she will work closely with our Republican delegation and President Trump to strengthen our military, secure our borders, protect our constitutional rights, continue rolling back unnecessary regulations and promote economic policies that allow the private sector to grow more jobs and opportunities now — and for future generations.

It is a historic time for Mississippi as we are sending our first woman to the U.S. Senate. But this appointment is not about gender or one person — it’s about doing what’s best for our state.

It is my hope and belief that Cindy will inspire all young people to work hard to achieve their goals because as Cindy recently said, “the American dream is alive and well in Mississippi.”

Cindy Hyde-Smith is a Mississippi success story and will make us proud representing our state in the U.S. Senate.


Phil Bryant is the governor of Mississippi.

This post is a paid advertisement by the Mississippi GOP.


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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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