Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Should Oliver resign?

Representative Karl Oliver (R-Bull Run) tried to apologize for his lynching comments he made on Facebook but calls for his resignation grew.  The Unreconstructed Southerner made this comment on Facebook Sunday:




Speaker Phillip Gun revoked his Vice-Chairmanship of the Forestry Committee and condemned his remarks.  Fellow Representative Penny Cockerham sent this message to JJ:

"I am deeply troubled by the remarks made my fellow colleague, Rep. Karl Oliver, and those House colleagues who liked such language on Rep. Oliver's Facebook page.

As one who works across racial and party lines, it is my prayer that the healing process will continue in our state and that my House and Senate colleagues and I will work to build one Mississippi. #OneMississippi"
Governor Bryant said "Rep. Oliver’s language was unacceptable and has no place in civil discourse."

Mr. Oliver apologized in an email sent to reporters.  JJ will post the apology on this website if it is submitted.  The NAACP also called for his resignation as representative.  Mississippi NAACP President and fraudster Derrick Johnson said:

“While Oliver is entitled to his opinions as a citizen, he is not entitled to use the power of his office to force those opinions on others.  As a state representative, Mr. Oliver influences public policy that affects all Mississippians and hate-filled statements like these have no place at the state capitol.”
 The legislative Black Caucus demanded he resign as well.  

Kingfish note:  Two steps forward, four steps back. Good job, Mr. Oliver (sarcasm).  Friggin idiot.   The funny part is you hurt your side ten times worse than your opponents could have.  However, maybe you don't get that angle when you live in a bubble in rural Mississippi.   Mr. Oliver should resign.  He advocated violence as a public official.  He crossed the line.  Time for him to go. 

Meanwhile, Carlos the Clown took time from making up "rhetorical devices" in Tupelo to file a lawsuit against Oliver. 

 Yup.  Attorney Carlos Moore sued Mr. Oliver, Representative John Read, Representative Doug McLeod, and Tony Dunn of the Mississippi Highway Patrol yesterday in U.S. District Court.  McLeod, Dunn, and Read apparently "liked" Oliver's post on Facebook.  He actually accused them of wanting to have him lynched. Read the short but colorful complaint for yourself:

87 comments:

Anonymous said...

No!!!!!

Anonymous said...

No. That's what elections are for. You want him out....vote him out. Unfortunately, the area he's representing....he will most likely be re-elected.

Anonymous said...

Yes, he is dead weight. He will never have anyones support, might as well get someone that can help his district.

Anonymous said...

i think JR Lynch Street and Whop Poor Will should be renamed. They offend me.
let's rename the cap city to Medgar Eversville.
I get he had a poor choice of words. But he should not have to resign. Kennuf said to throw rocks at people. No one said he should resign.
Errebody gets offended by erry lil thang now.

Anonymous said...

Hell NO! Bogus racist elected officials in New Orleans should resign

Anonymous said...

Oliver knew what he was doing and intentionally used violent, incendiary language. You can pull that BS when you dig water wells for a living in Noxubee County, but when you represent the citizens of your district in the state government, you are to be held to a higher standard. Time for him to go.

Carlos Moore-on is as full of shit as one can get. No one should afford this numb nuts theatrical stunt any credence. I refrain from using my name on this post, lest he sue me for threatening to have him murdered by fecal asphyxiation.

bill said...

The voters should decide. House leadership can censure him, restructure his committee assignments, or otherwise render him ineffective in a number of ways, but the voters are the only ones who should determine who occupies the office.

Anonymous said...

If his constituents want a moron to represent them that is their choice. It certainly seems to be in vogue with multiple other counties and municipalities in the state.

Anonymous said...

If every elected official who said/did something stupid was made to resign because of said action, then there would be no one in office. I agree that the voters can take care of it when he is up for re-election.

Anonymous said...

"they should be lynched" is quite distinct from "let's go lynch them." The first is offering an opinion, the second is inciting. He was wrong for verbalizing his poor word choice in this hypersensitive world we live in.

Anonymous said...

If Oliver should resign for using his elected position as a sounding board for his opinion, shouldn't these same groups calling for his resignation also call for the resignation of Kenny Stokes?

noel said...

When legislators from other districts come into the capitol city we should throw rocks and bottles at them to let them know we don't want them espousing violence!

Anonymous said...

Who's being lynched now?

Anonymous said...

I am a Black Man, 62 years old and my comment is; I can appreciate and deal with a man when he speaks what he feels. Its the ones that tell one side, one thing, and you the other just to make you feel warm and fuzzy!

That Rep has balls!!! Or he was smoking that loco weed, when he pressed the send key on that keyboard.

I would continue to vote for him if he was in my district! Ain't nothing like an ignorant politician. He would make a good drinking buddy, if he provided the liquor!

The man represents his District, leave the man alone. He knows what he is doing.

Anonymous said...

No free speech for white men????

Anonymous said...

O.k.

Let's run this down

Yes he should resign because based on this state's past, it's an ugly term that draws up the ugliest parts of Mississippi's history

However, considering that this is Mississippi and of course, a majority of Mississippian's will rally around a white male that is an elected official of the party in control - he will get a slap on the wrist and forced to give a powder puff apology and not be held accountable for his actions. Let's add in that this state is in love with some confederate history so he will get bonus points for sticking it to the Politically Correct liberal crowd.

This place is so sad.

Anonymous said...

Absolutely! However, I doubt if he will.

Anonymous said...

Michael Scott, a prominent partner at ReedSmith, having his name on a BS complaint where the drafter doesn't know the difference between subrogation and subjugation is rather odd to say the least. This one will not go Carlos' way and someone may have to get the checkbook out before it is over.

Anonymous said...

I support him resigning as long as Kennuf Stokes, Tony Yarber, Andtwar Lumumba (immediately after he's elected), Barbara Blackmon, Ed Blackmon, Maxine Waters, et al. all resign first. Oh wait. They don't have to resign for things they've said or done? Nevermind.

loess learner said...

For use of the term "lynched", the public and metaphorical lynching of the Representative is well under way.
Meanwhile, the actual lynching of whites by blacks continues.

Anonymous said...

No way in hell he should resign. He might be stupid and make stupid comments, but that has not been a determining factor for membership in the legislature before and shouldn't start now. His using the term "lynch" was not well founded and some might somehow determine in their mind that it is racist. But if you want to follow KF's theory that he 'threatened a public official" the public official would be the mayor, who is white. So, either it wasn't racist, or it wasn't threatening of a public official. Further, he didn't suggest he would do the lynching, so that is not a threat.

It was a stupid remark. If it was out of line, let the voters in his district determine so - its not up to the black caucus, or a blogger, or an editorial writer to make that determination.

If one wants to say that it was racist and therefore he should resign, lets start calling for the resignation of several members of the legislature that have made specific, directed racist remarks against white individuals. Plenty of examples, but they are ignored because nobody wants to call them out or else they operate on the theory that racism only goes in one direction.

Anonymous said...

If every moron in the house and senate were to resign, we would save a lot of money on legislative salaries as there would be no one left in those august bodies.

That said, I agree he should resign.

Anonymous said...


You can't say that people should be lynched if you are a public elected official, especially in a state that has a history of lynching.

And then we wonder why people 20-30 are leaving the state in droves...

Double standard said...

If he was black , it would have never been an issue

Anonymous said...

William Winter ran for Governor as a segregationist.

Anonymous said...

I hope the Court sanctions Carlos the clown for that waste of paper.

Burke said...

Before we go any further into the existing polarization on Confederate history, I respectfully ask that you take a look at Mitch Landrieu's speech on the removal of Confederate monuments in New Orleans.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0jQTHis3f4

Anonymous said...

@ 12:15 That Complaint is comedy gold. They have to do two book reports? Hilarious. Agreed about sanctions. I have seen better complaints from crazy pro se inmates.

Anonymous said...

It would be nice if he would resign, but his constituents will probably give him their overwhelming support, so just reprimand him and leave him alone. Unless he does something criminal his district has every right to be represented by an idiot. Absolutely no different than Mr. Stokes district or some fool who hires Carlos Moore to represent them in Court. Moore will eventually get lucky and get national exposure and become the next Al Sharpton. He's got no sense and no integrity but he's got plenty of ambition, and that's enough.

Anonymous said...

No. All the starbucks baristas saying Kingston Frazier's death was somehow an "accident" should resign. All the newspaper editors who think that fake hate crimes are a bigger priority than real terrorist attacks should resign. And any fascist who tries to destroy art and history in the name of their liberal narrative should DEFINITELY resign. -mr37

Anonymous said...

I am a lifelong conservative and I am absolutely disappointed at the avalanche of "Hell No!" comments here. You people have got to be kidding!

Lynching is a specific term for behavior that, in modern context, is defined as a racially-motivated vigilante hanging. To suggest that people should look past the racial connotation is disingenuous at best. We should be better than this.

There are situations where people make a poorly worded statement meaning one thing, but others twist it to an alternative meaning, claim offense, and demand an apology. This is what race hustlers do. This is Al Sharpton/Rachel Maddow/Donna Ladd territory.

That does not apply here.

Oliver used a very specific term to express his anger at people who are removing monuments that, to many, have a racial component. We can argue all day long as to whether those monuments are truly "racist" in nature (I don't believe they are), but it is the epitome of foolishness to fail to see the racial powder keg he ignited by choosing that word.

Oliver knew what he was doing when he used "lynched". If he didn't he is a total moron.

Yes, Kenny Stokes says to throw rocks at police and other stupid things and his people keep electing him. So what? God help you if that is the standard you want to live by. You want to behave like those Stokes voters? You want a dunderhead of a candidate like Kenny who may pop off again next month with another offensive comment? You want to play the game of, "well they do it, so we can do it, too"? That's juvenile and pathetic.

Is this guy a dyed-in-the-wool sheet-wearing racist? I don't know, but I do know that he's a loose cannon who has no compunction about making poorly-though-out statements in public that make Mississippi conservatives look like WE are the ones who wear the sheets.

I'll be damned if I, as a conservative, will bear that reputation for some show of solidarity to save Oliver's dumb ass. He needs to go.

Anonymous said...

Oliver is racist and should resign. The Confederacy lost the civil war. It's time to accept that and bury your hatred for people like me. No more racism and signs of white supremacy. Time to create a clean slate for Mississippi and move on from the past. Time to tackle white priveledge and create a more equal society where race doesn't matter in life. Until you acknowledge white privilege and accept its consequences there can be no racial healing.

Anonymous said...

Trump = Racist
White Mississippians voted for Trump
White Mississippians = Racist

It's logic 101 people. Get your head out of the sand and acknowledge your white privilege!

Anonymous said...

Local Democrats have said things equally as dumb, however, it never makes national news. The CL will not even put a D by some politicians name. The media pretty much covers for Democrats. He could say he will resign if Thompson and Stokes resign. Put it back in their court.

Anonymous said...

First it was the "n" word, now it's the "l" word, would someone please issue a list of words that some may find offensive so we can stop being sued for for having free speech?

Anonymous said...

102. I echo that. Let the Donkeycrats be Donkeycrats. We aren't them.

Anonymous said...

"I got offended by something someone posted on Facebook" -LosersoftheWorld

Anonymous said...

Frankly, there is no law against racists being elected to the legislature. In fact there are probably a dozen or so there now. That is, if one is to accept the fact that racism is not one directional.

Do I have to like the fact that an office holder is racist? No. But do I have the right to expect them not to run for office, or for voters to vote for the candidate of their choice.

While I do not accept the fact that the definition of "lynching" includes a racist aspect, as many commentators and bloggers and editorial writers and black caucus members claim - but it doesn't really matter. Oliver didn't threaten anyone with this statement, just expressed an opinion. A stupid one, but stupid doesn't disqualify one from holding office either.

I am not a Trump supporter, although I voted for him because he was by far the better choice over Clinton. The similarities of those that want to holler racism over things they don't like are strong - I have been called a racist because of my vote and "assumed" support. It doesn't bother me because I consider the source. The problem is that too many people get offended at others any time they disagree with them - and now the word 'impeachment' is in everyone's vocabulary.

Take a breath. Enjoy the day. Put this terrible injustice aside. Nobody is getting lynched today, including Rep Oliver. Sit back and be glad he is not your representative - many of us are represented by racist members that get by with statements like this on a regular basis, both in session and out. But they get by with it because the political correctness of our world doesn't allow calling them out due to their race.

Anonymous said...

He should resign. Mainly because he is an idiot.

Anonymous said...

Maybe this will get Al and Jesse and Black Lives Matter to Jack-town. Lord knows they aren't coming for little Kingston.

On another note, you people do know that Mitch Landrieu is white don't you?

Anonymous said...

There is nothing racist about his remark. The word 'lynch' can have no racist connotation. Kingfish, as usual, is stirring the shit tank hoping for posts/hits. What the hell is an 'unreconstructed' Southerner, Kingfish? You have no clue and have no business using that phrase in your headline. Or do you mean, perhaps, a Southerner who doesn't fall in line with the union's orders for reconstruction of The Confederacy? And, of course those who did not, must be racist according to Kingfish and other yanks.

Lincoln's own brother-in-law referred to the tall-hatted President as 'The Greatest Scoundrel Unhung'. Does that make him a racist too? Or is the word 'unhung' different in some way from 'unlynched'? I don't really expect Kingfish to understand this level of discourse since he's so hung up on rabble-rousing and race-baiting with this thread anyway.

But, hell, I'm wasting my time since he'll zap this post anyway.

Justice for Trayvon said...

How many yall have got white robes hanging in your closets? Oliver MUST resign period. Talking about lynching black folks in 2017??? We will not tolerate this hate speech. He must be forcibly removed from office and prosecuted NOW!! NO JUSTICE NO PEACE!!!

Anonymous said...

@2:03, if that were the case, Jackson and the majority of the Democratic should resign. Remember that doofus that thought CUBA would flip upside down from too many people at GITMO.

Anonymous said...

Convinced nothing can penetrate the thinking of those who drank the Noble Lost cause 'Kool Aid' and accept these myths as gospel. Does not make one a racist as were their confederate and sons of confederate ancestors who erected these monuments to the South all over the place. Same folks who defend the state flag, a flag adapted as voting rights were removed from blacks and poor white trash under the 1891 Constitution. Removing these New Orleans monuments was silly, the defense used to keep them is mostly erroneous. The attack on them from the cult of political correctness angle is dangerous.

Micah Gober said...

What is white privilege? I'M poor and white with out a job. I come from a poor family. Tell what white privilege is.

Anonymous said...

2:03 - you really don't want that. Just think of the cost for all the special elections we would be forced to have if idiocy was a determining fact forcing resignations. That would be even worse than resignations/special elections for people considered by some to be racist, or to have made what they determined to be racist comments.

We go to the polls too much already. Those continuous special elections would become burdensome.

Anonymous said...


I agree with Kingfish---the people in his district should decide---they hired him.

We all say things that we are sorry for---how many of the black legislators have used the Cracker term or heaven forbid, the "W" word meaning Whitey.

Anonymous said...

NO What about Kenny Stokes, supporting throwing bricks, rocks & bottles at Police. Confederate Monuments are A PART OF History. Watch, the Washington Monument, will SOON be a target for removal as he (George) was a "SLAVEHOLDER" Already the us flag is a target of the left snowflakes!

Anonymous said...

If all idiots were required to resign, we wouldn't have anyone left in the legislature or other statewide positions.

Anonymous said...

I'm offended, 1:42. I'm offended because this numbskull makes a stupid statement and the rest of us have to deal with a fresh wave of attacks from the liberals and their tires old mantra of "everyone's a racist (except us)" which has just been injected with a fresh dose of adrenaline by Karl Oliver.

I'm so sick of listening to the self-congratulatory left drone on about how we conservatives are all racists and I'm tired of having to defend myself and my beliefs, and just when you've gotten ahead, here comes Dopey from Winona, spouting stupidity and giving new fuel to that tired old argument.

As I said above (@ 1:02), I'm tired of bearing the load of dumbasses like Oliver who make us look bad and guilty by association when he opens his stupid mouth and spouts his blather. He needs go home to Winona and get back to the embalming business instead of making messes that real conservatives have to clean up.

Anonymous said...

The proliferation of cell phones, twitter, social media etc. will make it impossible for loud mouthed idiots to get by with what were once private utterances meant only for a select few. This idiot and others like him must learn to control their expressions or bear the price. His fellows in the legislature should sanction him heavily to set an example that hopefully others will learn from. Get used to this. It's the big challenge facing public officials, law enforcement, and celebrities. It's just a matter of time before the President of the U.S., who is also apparently a social media fiend, says something totally idiotic and unacceptable in the course of an emotional outburst. Will he resign? Stand by.

Anonymous said...

It's amazing how over the past ten years or so, the intolerant progressives call everyone a racist if that person disagrees with them.I would guess that if you looked at their lives most of them have expressed racist views even though they would be intellectuall dishonest and not admit to it. Yes many white progressives express racist views toward fellow whites.Whether good or bad, the term racists is being diluted to mean I don't agree with you. If someone calls me a racist, I could care less.

Crickets said...

NAACP statement on NCAA regional at Ole Miss (which does not fly the state flag): "Mississippi NAACP is requesting the NCAA continue its opposition to symbols of racial hatred and expand its ban to all NCAA sanctioned events and relocate the Softball Regional Tournament at the University of Mississippi on Friday, May 19, 2017."

NAACP Statement on Karl Oliver: "Anyone who champions a fond remembrance of such a violent, racist history is unworthy of elected office. Karl Oliver must step down as he cannot in good faith represent all of the citizens of Mississippi."

NAACP Statement on Kingston Frazier murder: ""

Anonymous said...

This is a bunch of BS.

Perhaps he should've said "drawn & quartered" or "shot by firing squad". Simply a strong figure of speech - but in today's PC world...

Personally I wish he'd said "tarred & feathered".

Anonymous said...

Mitch is white? You sure?

Anonymous said...

I am a lifelong conservative ...

Doesn't make your opinion any more meritorious than any other conservative or otherwise.

Anonymous said...

... instead of making messes that real conservatives have to clean up.

You mean the RINOs, right?

Anonymous said...

If you are a white republican, why use Kenny Stokes as the bar for acceptable behavior? Just because Kenny didn't resign doesn't mean we should not set much higher standards from a legislator. If Kenny is the comparison, we are all doomed.

Anonymous said...

2:42...it's having a safety net of somebody paying for you to sit on the internet in the middle of the day when you could be out mowing yards.

Anonymous said...

All of this over some very large participation trophies.

Anonymous said...

I'm offended by the political name chosen by legitimate, proven racist, the Democratic Party. Why do we have to suffer seeing this groups name mentioned? They bought slaves, sold slaves, abused and murdered in the name of slavery. Started a civil war over slavery. Kept black Americans from voting, segregated. Tried to stop civil rights legislation. It's time to end this racist group.

Anonymous said...

I can't help but wonder if Rep. Oliver is going to be as passionate about history next session when it's time to fund history classrooms.

Anonymous said...

If Kenny can do it we can do it. Do you know how stupid that sounds.

Anonymous said...

4:19:

Has there ever been a time when you and your ilk haven't used the NAACP or black people in general as nothing more than a cudgel in order to make pathetic attempts at concern trolling online?

Crickets: *silence*

Anonymous said...

If everyone demanding his resignation can HONESTLY say they have NEVER made a racist comment, they he should resign. But if they themselves have ever made a racist (or perceived racist) comment, then they need to shut the F up!

Anonymous said...

May 24, 2017 at 6:39 PM = Did that feel good?

Anonymous said...

why should he resign? in a state that has a Forrest county, a state flag that's loathed by most people in the country but near and dear to most of the state's residents, and a reservoir named Barnett--statements like these are to be celebrated.

It certainly shows the true nature of the state. Character isn't defined by sitting in a pew on Sunday morning, but by what's in the heart. Defending the use of the word "lynched' says a whole lot about his heart.

Anonymous said...

Abraham Lincoln's brother in law referred to the tall-hatted president as 'the greatest scoundrel unhung. Was he a racist?

Racism, most anywhere it exists, is defined by the heart, not by the use of a word. Who among you would know him if you saw him, much less know his heart.

You people are way too anxious to lynch the man on social media.

Anonymous said...

856 is right again. I mean is this really hate speech. This is not racism in my opinion. racism is oh never mind why even try PC america rock on

Anonymous said...

"concern trolling"

The new buzz phrase that is all the rage among the JFP crowd. Makes it easy to identify Ladd and her minions.

Anonymous said...

This comment thread is a perfect example of why this benighted state is 50th in everything. Any sane person would realize what this moron said was rascist stupidity and he should, out of self respect if nothing else, go away. But instead, we get the usual excuses. How about you real "Republicans" quit hiding behind your made up RINO acronym and realize this imbecile is a real Republican? He just used his outside voice while expressing an inner thought. I thought real "Republicans" loved the free market and Adam Smith's "invisible hand". I'm sure all you Alinsky experts will have to look that phrase up, but taking his obvious to anyone with A brain cell side, how do you think that comment helps attract business? And don't give me "gubment shouldn't be in business" BS. That ship sailed a long time ago but for damn sure after the budget was cut for the umpteenth time all the while giving Ingalls 45 million in our "balanced budget". They are all louses. Trying to apologize for the most recently loudest idiot is pathetic.

Anonymous said...

I wonder what Tater thinks....and President Trump, they are the only people we haven't heard from....

Anonymous said...

This comment thread is a perfect example of why this benighted state is 50th in everything.

Then why are you here?

Anonymous said...

10:06 purports to define racism for us but can't even spell the word (rascist). Go read that post if you want to see the day's most supreme example of discombobulated idiocy. Dope on parade!

Anonymous said...

Because some of us don't run and hold out hope, no matter how foolish, that people like you will die off and a good generation will follow, and we want to be here to support it.

Anonymous said...

Attaboy, grammar Nazi. No actual repudiation of anything i said. Merely the ability to point out a spelling mistake. Your inbred mother/cousin must be proud.

Anonymous said...

11:31...I had thought about taking apart your rambling diatribe one sentence at a time, but I sorta got stumped with this one (below) and hours later I'm still wondering what the hell you're talking about and if you even know:

"That ship sailed a long time ago but for damn sure after the budget was cut for the umpteenth time all the while giving Ingalls 45 million in our "balanced budget". They are all louses. Trying to apologize...

You damned sure managed to 'lynch' the English language and sentence structure all with one fell swoop!

Anonymous said...

That anyone would defend saying someone should be killed for expressing a political opinion contrary to your own is astounding.
Such a mindset belongs in Putin's Russia or the Caliphate, not in this country!

Anonymous said...

No actual repudiation of anything i said.

None needed. You didn't say anything.

Anonymous said...

Damn this reads like a wannabe Alan Lange bloviator contest.

Anonymous said...

I'm still trying to figure out how race factored in to his post. I just re-read it, and he only refers to the "'leadership' of Louisiana."

Burke said...

Well, Kingfish, you threw us some raw meat again. I bit off a little myself. Could not resist. Again.

Anonymous said...

"...meone should be killed for expressing a political opinion..."

Newsflash, genius. Landrieu didn't just 'express a political opinion'. Please bring yourself current.

And here's a jewel: "He just used his outside voice while expressing an inner thought." Reminds me of a kindergarten teacher who admonishes children to 'speak softly in your inner voice' if you expect a silver stick-on star beside your name on the board. But, in the case above, it means nothing. Such rambling bullshit is not foreign to this blog-site, but it's rare that we see the bloviater come back four times asking people to pick his nonsense apart.

He actually lost me with run on sentences, nonsensical phrases, lack of commas, comparisons that ran off the cliff of reason and theatrical references to Saul Alinsky and sailing ships. He did manage to leave out walruses and ceiling wax though.

Anonymous said...

3:39 pm Try to keep up with the news. The black Congressman who called for Trump's impeachment got " lynching" threats.
It's no difference if the reference is to another elected official acting within his authority. Landrieu holds a different political view.
What is it about lynching as a tool to threaten, intimidate and terrorize that you don't understand?

Anonymous said...

The monuments are not being destroyed, so he really got worked up over something that wasn't even true. The monuments are being put into storage until a group with a legitimate interest in the monuments is approved to take possession. We did basically the same thing in Mississippi several years ago when the statue of our premier racemonger, Theodore G. Bilbo, was moved from its place of honor in the middle of the Capital Rotunda and placed in the back of a meeting room in the Capital. It was not destroyed but merely relocated.

Anonymous said...

Go ahead guys, that sound you hear is the younger generation leaving the state in droves! I know the retort," well if you don't like it here leave." That is what is happening so you will be left with a bottom feeder economy and more 50 rankings on most list that matter. Truly "Old times here are not forgotten" Bless your hearts!!

Anonymous said...

What is wrong @7:39 PM? Pushed out of shape that no one responded a couple days back? Need attention?

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In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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