Friday, April 20, 2018

Huh?

The Jackson Mayor made this statement about the Rez at his press conference about the Jackson Zoo last week.




Jackson lost the Rez?  Is this some more of De'Keither Stamps's alternate history or did I miss something? For some strange reason, I thought that Hinds, Leake, Rankin, Madison, and Scott counties built the Rez.  Perhaps readers can help me out. 

73 comments:

Anonymous said...

Does anyone really think that the City of Jackson has any control or input on decisions made about the Rez over the last 20 years?

Anonymous said...

I guess he thinks the folks who moved to Madison County picked it up and moved it north with them

Anonymous said...

Only thing Antar has to sell is grievance and victimhood.

Anonymous said...

The city of Jackson limits extend into the water of the reservoir

Anonymous said...

Revisionist history works well when speaking to folks who don't want to recognize truth and facts. The City of Jackson "invested in" the Res as a part of Hinds County. And one of its justifications/purposes was to be a source of water supply to the city - which it is. But for Baby Chock to think that "we" invested in it is more of the b/s that he likes to spout when speaking to those that want a radical new city.

Anonymous said...

Baby Chok is just like Obama............he just makes shit up as he goes along. Anything goes just as long as it fits his narrative. And his supporters will not question anything that comes out of his mouth.

Anonymous said...

I'm confused. When did it ever belong to the City of Jackson and not the PRVWSD or its board?

Anonymous said...

Can someone tell me which part of the Reservoir is withing the city of Jackson? Jackson, by way of Hinds County, may have 'invested' and may 'benefit', but not a damned inch of the Reservoir is inside or touching Jackson. Maybe he thinks the Pearl River is the Reservoir.

Anonymous said...

"The city of Jackson limits extend into the water of the reservoir. April 20, 2018 at 2:48 PM"

You need to get somebody to figure you some better coordinates for your Jon boat, Luther.

Anonymous said...

If Jackson took ownership of the Rez in no time at all it would look like Sugar Ditch.

Anonymous said...

By this logic, the City of Jackson has also lost the Great Lakes and Canada.

Anonymous said...

And yet Jackson consistently fights the one lake and two lake projects because some white people IN JACKSON might benefit.

Chok has done some good things (far more than Yarber or Harvey) but stuff like this kills his credibility outside of his little bubble.

Anonymous said...

I think he was confused and was talking about Lake Hico.

Anonymous said...

The Reservoir is a good example of regional cooperation between governments and the City of Jackson was not one on them. Jackson has a mayor that know nothing about history and is bat crazy.

Anonymous said...

2:56. also just makes up stuff like Trump too.. It’s called “politician speaking”. they all tell what you want to hear not the truth

Anonymous said...

He’s a dumb bunny but his constituents will buy it.

Anonymous said...

"Baby Chok is just like Obama............he just makes shit up as he goes along. Anything goes just as long as it fits his narrative. And his supporters will not question anything that comes out of his mouth.

I'm afraid you have compared Miniature Chokwe to the wrong President, I believe the current dictator-in-chief fits that description a whole lot better.

Anonymous said...

The city of Jackson was responsible for the tree stump removal contracts.

Anonymous said...

Baby Chok is just like Trump...he just makes shit up as he goes along. Anything goes just as long as it fits his narrative. And his supporters will not question anything that comes out of his mouth.

I agree wholeheartedly.

Anonymous said...

Oh my. Is the reservoir even in Hinds County? NO!! How the %&&$* can Jackson claim that it once belonged to the City of Jackson? This is absurd. Next CHOKWAY will determine that the City of Jackson once made up the entire state of MS, the South, and all of the USA! what a load of crap!

Anonymous said...

Dumas Milner, Alvis Hunt, Warren Hood and Leland Speed Sr made the reservoir happen. The Pearl actually damn near dried up during summer. The reservoir was a must for the tri-county to grow.

Anonymous said...

in the early 60s the legislature created the pearl river valley water supply district. hereinafter the PRVWSD. the PRVWSD is an administrative agency of state government. this legislation that created it was introduced and pushed through by state senator john h stennis. the law firm if the good senator then got the contract to represent the PRVWSD and was able to shake down every buyer of property within the PRVWSD charging a fee to approve every lease transfer. if baby chock is looking for a rip-off at the reservoir, thats it.

Anonymous said...


He's all about "claiming" something very nice and available to all citizens.

I noticed he didn't include Bailey Avenue, Valley St., Terry Road and thousands of other "places" Jackson "invested" in.

Anonymous said...

@5:01 - the airport isn't in Hinds county, but it is part of the city of jackson. js

SR71 said...

Check you maps. Hinds County does extend into a portion of the Ross Barnett Reservoir. It is just a tiny sliver near the spillway.

Yes, I learned something new today.

Anonymous said...

Too much “us” and “them”

White people neglected Jackson and left it to rot.

Black people control Jackson and have not the tax base nor the know how which could only be derived from a willing and able united populace.

Trump (and his hate filled supporters) may provide us the chance to hate each other enough to kill each other and maybe then we can start anew.

Make America Kill Each Ofhed Again

Anonymous said...

Chok has done some good things (far more than Yarber or Harvey) ...

Name just 3 "good things".

Anonymous said...

Black people control Jackson and have not the tax base nor the know how ...

So you're saying that black people need to be trained by whites how to run Jackson?

Anonymous said...

Why don't you see any white folk at Cowke public address?

Anonymous said...

Cowke played the race card when Trump came to the State (Not Jacktown) Civil Rights Museum. 6:29 PM the opposite is happening. Blacks are killing each other off in Jackson. That's why the prisons have a majority of blacks in them.

Anonymous said...

Well the mayors dad wanted to teach to kids that Africans discovered America so it's perfectly logical for his son to claim Jackson once created the Rez. What a pathetic joke.

Now Hear This! said...

6:29 - How does it feel to walk around in a fog of confusion? It was actually the prior president who divided the races and turned many against the police agencies. He pretty much single-handedly pushed back race relations to the year 1956. Turn your cap around and get aboard the 'train of reality'.

Anonymous said...

........, right? ............, right? ..........., right?

Anonymous said...

In 1956 the Pearl River Industrial Commission was authorized by the Mississippi State Legislature to study the feasibility of development along the Pearl River basin near Jackson, Mississippi, primarily the creation of a reservoir through the construction of a spillway and dam. A hearing on the proposed development was heard by the State Board of Water Commissioners, as well as the Boards of Supervisors within the proposed district, and found that the project was a public necessity to compensate for the increasing demand for potable water (PEER report #471, 2004, page 3). As a result of that finding, the Pearl River Valley Water Supply District (PRVWSD) was created in 1958 to oversee construction and future management of the Pearl River Reservoir (later named the Ross Barnett Reservoir), its watersheds, and surrounding land. The reservoir project was completed 1965 following the construction of an impoundment of the Pearl River bordering Rankin and Madison counties.[1] The funding for the reservoir's construction was secured through bonds, which were to be paid off, in part, by taxes collected from municipalities within the newly formed district, as well as the city of Jackson, which would be drawing drinking water from the reservoir. The construction bonds were paid-off in 1992, and, since that time, the district no longer collects taxes,[2] rather relying primarily on annual lease fees from residential and commercial properties within the district for funding.[3]

The Ross Barnett Reservoir serves as the primary source of drinking-water for Mississippi's nearby capital city, Jackson.[10][11] A 1982 lawsuit was brought against the district by the city, successfully claiming that PRVWSD misappropriated tax collections from the city for purposes other than paying off the original reservoir construction bonds, including the funding of a district law enforcement agency. The bonds were paid off in 1992, and the district no longer collects taxes from the city.[12]

F mickns said...

Just sayin' and askn':

Has someone actually asked the Mayor/Administration where he got data to back up his Jackson lost ownership of the Zoo statement.

1. Exactly how did the previous President, in his 8 yer term, personally DIVIDE the U.S? Did he personally have anything to do with the 300 year in the making , racial problems in the U,S.? Racial divides and problems, designed, propagated, nurtured protected, promoted, professed, defended by the White ruling society? Specifics examples, or did he divide our country just by being elected by the mostly WHITE majority of voters..

2. Jackson provided 38% of the Zoo "Revenue last year.
http://jacksonzoo.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Annual-Report-2017-Small-Digital.pdf PAGE 10.

3. King, in an over one hour press conference the only statement the Mayor made you deemed erroneous enough to comment on, was an 8 second, probably incorrect, sound byte/bite?

Only last month I gave up and said move the Zoo. After hearing the Mayor, looking at the projected cost to move the Zoo, looking at the time it would take to move the Zoo, I have come around to leaving the Zoo where it is.

4. Yes the Jackson African American voting population controls political power in Jackson, in accordance with our Federal and State Constitutions. However, voters in Jackson CONTROL less than 1%, as far as my reading indicates, of the economic, investment capital and disposable income of Jackson. Not faulting anyone, just stating the facts.

5.The deterioration of West Jackson, Jackson, Hinds County and the State of Mississippi (by projection), has been studied, documented, reported and predicted by the Kerner Commission Report of 1968. The Kerner Commission for=med after the 1967 race Urban Riots in major U.S. cities.

Then President "Johnson asked for answers to three basic questions about the riots: "What happened? Why did it happen? What can be done to prevent it from happening again and again?"

The Kerner Commission, not Jessie Jackson, not Martin Luther King, not the Black Panthers, not the NAACP coined used the phrase "The report's most famous passage warned, "Our nation is moving toward two societies, one black, one white—separate and unequal." One Black and one White.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kerner_Commission

6. Has someone actually asked the Mayor/Administration where he got data to back up his Jackson lost ownership of the Zoo statement?

Anonymous said...

It was the state legislature led by Mitch Robinson and to a lesser degree Vaughan Watkins. It was Robinson's brain child since the great flood of 1927,finally got it done in the 60s.

F mickns said...

CORRECTION: In my previous post I made a mistake. I was referring to Mayopr's statement of Jackson losing ownership of the "REZ" and not the Zoo.

Anonymous said...

Great Flood of 1927????????

What?

That was the MS River and did not affect the Jackson area.

Mitch Robinson's concern was supplying water to Jackson, not flood control

Anonymous said...

Right 7:23. First it was the NAACP, Martin L. King and the commies who poisoned
the peaceful race relations we had for over 300 years, then the race-baiter Obama who single-handedly pushed race relations back to 1956. Seems like every time we set things right, some unrealistic black wants to stir things up... Why don't they get on the train of reality? (It's a southbound train.)

Anonymous said...

The flood didn't have to affect Jackson to have an impact on someone from there. Robinson commissioned a study from the army corps of engineers right after the flood to dam the Pearl River. Look it up. Water for Jackson was a key reason but not the only reason. Flood protection and recreation were the other two main reasons.



Anonymous said...

Thanks KF for pointing out Chok's monumental gaffe. Don't let the excuse makers shake you up. Imagine what shape this country would be in if our political leaders could make public statements full of exaggeration, innuendo, bragging, name-calling, hyperbole, deception, and bullying. We'd be in bad shape. HUH?

Believe it or not said...

We are all aware of the 2 major reasons that the Ross Barnett Reservoir was built. The first being flood control on the upper Pearl River, and the second being a source for the drinking water of the City of Jackson. But there was actually a third reason for the construction that never came to fruition: Commerce via a canal that would be built from the Reservoir west to the Big Black River once the Big Black River would be made navigable to the Mississippi River.

Anonymous said...

7:23
Yes obama divides us.

He held rallies where blacks screamed profanities about whites.....oh wait....no he didn’t

Get your head out of your ass.

Anonymous said...

Another "Whitey done me wrong" speech.

Kingfish said...

Chill. No big expose here. Just having some fun

Anonymous said...

Many areas built reservoirs during that period. The thought was to treat surface water for metropolitan areas instead of ground water (wells). Jackson holds the water rights to feed the OB Curtis Water Plant. The whole reason for bringing together several counties was for recreation and to supply a steady water source. It has helped somewhat with flood control but it certainly has helped with providing pure fun and beauty.

Of Reservoirs, Racists and Revisionists said...

Kingfish: Since you allow your favorite new detractor, Mickns, to post his random theories and questions at length, it's only fair that you allow a response to one of his most absurd recent inquiries. Mickns actually pretends to have slept through Obama's eight years of racial divide. So....here goes:

Mickns: Is that a joke or are you seriously asking how Obama 'divided the races'?

The list is long: "If I had a son". Attending or dispatching his minions to attend black funerals. Posturing every time he could possibly weave a conspiracy involving a white policeman. Never mind the fact that black policemen are more likely to shoot a black man than white policemen are. Beer summits to pit one race against another. Ordering his black attorney general to ignore (not prosecute) armed, uniformed black radical racists who stood at polling places. Posturing every time a black person was killed by a white cop. Helping to create BLM and all but empowering the group to assault or kill white policemen. Famously telling majority white republicans that now your place is 'in the back of the bus'.

Any elementary use of your computer search engine will give you twenty or more articles clearly showing that Obama pushed a race-agenda at every opportunity, especially when the police were involved, when HUD was involved or when he could pretend black students are unfairly disciplined. Never mind that black students were shown to be the ones misbehaving. They must be disciplined in equal numbers according to the agenda of his Justice Department employees.

And never mind that blacks were (and are) being killed off in large measure by other blacks, it was Obama’s mission to insist that it was the police and discriminatory practices that were responsible for black deaths in America.

The primary calling of a Community Activist is to be a Neighborhood Agitator. And the primary obligation of a Neighborhood Agitator is to gin up anger and division and protest in order to support the agenda. Anything he could do to divide. Divide and conquer. Push the races further apart. A dynamic agenda. And a lasting legacy. A legacy of failure? Or one of accomplishing his objective?

And, yes, to answer a question I'm sure you'll dream up later; It was indeed a conspiracy to name the Reservoir after an avowed segregationist and have the citizens of Jackson drink the water from that reservoir for all these decades knowing what it would do to them, long term. We can go into that later.

Anonymous said...

10:58 am

You are delusional.

If people attending funerals divides races then we are doomed.

Your generalizations demonstrate your abject hatred of black people.

When people with your belief structure are dead and gone we can attempt to move toward a more perfect union.

Until then we tread water and must be subjected to your cockamamie theories all the while I bet you profess to be a “Christian.”

How many time this week did you say the N word or call someone a fag while you tithed to your Baptist cult?

Anonymous said...

I voted for baby choke but I now realize that he is a $#!t stirrer... or the other opinion would be he's a complete moron. He's yet to figure out fact from reality. Maybe akilo told him this.

Anonymous said...

April 21, 2018 at 12:22 AM

I am truly sorry, but for the sake of accuracy, you are plainly wrong. The Great Flood of 1927 had zero to do with "Mitch's Ditch."

According to Sorrels' research in 1962, Mitchell Robinson first discussed the Pearl River in 1926 as creating an adequate water supply for the growing city of Jackson, MS.

Anonymous said...

11:28 - I'm 10:58...While you accuse me of all sorts of things you seem to have profiled me and missed the mark terribly. Not sure why you hate Christians with your pissy remarks about tithing. I haven't been in an organized religion service in over thirty years and have not tithed either. But, if I had done both, would that make me a target of your discrimination?

There's nothing racially divisive about funerals, in themselves; however, when the man in the highest office in the free world attends or dispatches others to attend only the funerals of 'young black men' (as he calls them) and sends constant messages that 'the POleece have targeted and killed them', THAT is indeed racial division. And he thrived in it. He sent hundreds of subliminal hate-messages advocating disrespect for and murder of our policemen/women. You know that because you received those messages through your hate-antenna.

I don't use the N word and can't remember ever referring to anybody as a fag.

You, indeed, are the problem and YOU are the reason the races will always be at odds with each other. You project your hatred on others but it only YOU who will be consumed by that hatred.

At least Mickns is docile and harmless in his conspiracy theories. YOU are actually a present danger.

Anonymous said...

Check your maps because the Jackson city limits does extend into the reservoir. It’s easy to check out and see who is right.

Anonymous said...

10:58 Malcolm X once correctly remarked that the racist white man would call the doctor who diagnoses a disease the spreader of the disease. Simply because one deals directly with the racial divide that has been a part of this country even before it's inception does not mean that the same person invented the problem. To say that Obama divided the races is like saying that there was no rabies before Pasteur. Obama did not bother to bleach himself or to deny that he was black. Not that it would have mattered to people like yourself who would never accept him as a 'legitimate' president even if he had. But whatever ills your disrespect for him might lead you to imagine don't heap the sins of racism on his back when there are plenty of others who have done and are doing far worse. Move on.

Anonymous said...

Yes, the city limits of Jackson do extend into the Reservoir, about 25 feet. That also includes about a 50 yard section on the upper spillway road and 100 yards on the lower road. Please don't tell Choke because if he finds out he will send units out there to set up radar. He would much rather collect from Madison and Rankin County residents than the fine upstanding shooters of Jackson.

Anonymous said...

11:58/3:27 You need to learn that facts are irrelevant to those composing a narrative. But to those of us still operating in the world of objective reality, we appreciate your posts.

Anonymous said...

Just glad to be away from all the this. Moved to another state 3 years ago and there is whole other country out there than this 3rd world area where a handful of decent people are trying to exist. Jackson may be worst of the worst.

surveyor said...

4:02, if you are going by the maps available from Google, you need to check the absolute accuracy of how intersecting lines show - and understand that such maps are not the determinative fact on where points on land actually exist.

The intersection of Hinds, Rankin and Madison Counties occur on the spillway basically at the spillway (the original riverbed of the Pearl.) Jackson city limits extend in a point at this location, which is on the dam, not in the water. It may appear to be extending into the water on some maps, but the actual city limits don't touch the main body of water of the res.

Anonymous said...

8:16. The city of Jackson gets their water from the reservoir. There is a station very visible in the water that is the city of Jackson’s and is located in the city. I don’t use google maps.

Anonymous said...

https://www.maptechnica.com/city-map/Jackson/MS/2836000

Kingfish said...

While y'all quibble over maps and markers, the point is, the Rez never belonged to Jackson.

Anonymous said...

Simple answer to this and many other problems. Just blow up the dam and let Jackson have the Rez.

Micah Gober said...

After reading this I come to the conclusion "Who Cares"

Anonymous said...

allow me to add more confusion:

Jackson's O.B. Curtis water treatment plant is located wholly in the city of Ridgeland, county of Madison.

The intake for the O.B. Curtis water treatment plant IS NOT in the Jackson city limits. The plant also serves the Nissan plant. Didja know that Nissan pays CMU (Canton Municipal Utilities, small world, huh) who then pays the cit of Jackson?

This is why, IMO, that Jackson had issues with lead recently. Nissan (or basically any industry) does not like hard water and Jackson reduced the mineral content of the water to benefit Nissan. When you reduce the mineral content, scale no longer covers the soldered joints, which causes the leaching of lead.

Anyway, the city limits of Jackson does indeed "extend into the water" of RBR, but at a point about half way down the ramp to the Hinds County side of the back of the spillway. The point at which the Hinds, Rankin and Madison Counties converge is just east of the dam about 2-300ft into the water and almost half a mile from where the intake structure is.

There were never any, at any time, inklings that they city of Jackson owned, was going to own or almost owned any part of the actual reservoir.

Anonymous said...

8:51, the OB Curtis water treatment plant is located south of the dam, where the west ramp leads to the roadway. There is an intake structure in the res that is part of the treatment plant, but it is not in the city limits of Jackson. The structure you are talking about that is in the main body of water controls the spillway - its not part of the water treatment facility.

Anonymous said...

9:27 p.m., that's a nice map, and it does show that the NE point of the city limits of Jackson is on the spillway road. If you were posting this to claim that the city limits extends into the body of water, you fail.

Again, maps are indicators; actual survey boundries are the determinators. If you are interested in purchasing that sliver of water that you claim is in the city limits of Jackson, please give me a call; I'll make you a great deal on it - along with the a great bridge out west.

Dee Ray said...

5:58...even though some of you believe Obama, Malcolm X and MLK could all three walk across the reservoir, nobody has claimed that any of them invented racism or that the present racial divide was created by them. The fact remains that the current state of our racial turmoil, hate, anger, angst and division was perpetuated greatly during eight years of the Obama administration. That was his goal and that was his greatest accomplishment. It's his legacy and enables him to continue for thirty more years with his mission.

Anonymous said...

Many have correctly stated Rez was to be built to help with flood control for the entire basin. Big problem was that the construction did not match that objective, that is why down stream is loosing it's river banks at a alarming rate.

And now they want one/two lake that would dry up downstream and cause major industries to close.

Let's not make a bad problem worse.

Anonymous said...

Dee Ray those 3 gentlemen have nothing to do with the racism that is taking place today. Racism lives in the people not 3 individuals. Everyone has a choose to be races or not and that goes for Brown and Vanilla humans. Let the past stay where it is cus It's alot of untold stories so lets not go there.

Anonymous said...

And now they want one/two lake that would dry up downstream and cause major industries to close.

Unsubstantiated FUD

Anonymous said...

The fact remains that the current state of our racial turmoil, hate, anger, angst and division was perpetuated greatly during eight years of the Obama administration. That was his goal and that was his greatest accomplishment. It's his legacy and enables him to continue for thirty more years with his mission.

The sh*t that people come up with on this site!?

Look, you are only lying to yourself when you come up with comments that damn outrageous. Just be honest and admit you cannot accept and/or handle seeing black people in positions of authority, especially high ranking positions in political office because you believe them to be inferior to you.

Anonymous said...

No more outrageous than the comments made about Geo W. Bush.

Anonymous said...

It's insane to suggest Jackson 'extends into the reservoir' because they have some sort of apparatus or equipment on a concrete jetty positioned next to spillway road. But, if that's the case, then Jackson State owns part of the reservoir since they have some sort of gauges and measuring devices on a concrete platform a mile northeast of Lost Rabbit.

We learn more every day about our reparations debt.

Anonymous said...

At 1:40, than why is Georgia Pacific the largest employer in Lawrence County and one of the largest in S.W. MS so against it? They have to have a constant flow or they cannot operate. Just saying.

Suscribe to latest on JJ.

Recent Comments

Search Jackson Jambalaya

Subscribe to JJ's Youtube channel

Archives

Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
.