Monday, April 30, 2018

Flowood Follies at the Jackson City Council

Leave it to Jackson City Councilman DeKeither Stamps to say something rather enlightened during the debate over the Jackson Zoo's proposed move.  Start around 1:00 in the video.  Mr. Stamps says the zoo should not move to Lefleur's Bluff because hit will help Flowood.  You can't make this up.  Guess the city shouldn't do anything for East County Line Road or Highway 80.  Watch for yourself.



67 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow. If anything Flowood would help the zoo rather than the Zoo help Flowood. But it all had to be based on race politics. Ready to see the zoo move out of the city altogether or just close since this move to another part of Jackson is being considered such an affront to justice.

Anonymous said...

BEeleive me, moving the zoo will NOT be the reason people choose to dine or stay in Flowood instead of crime-infested, third-world Jackson.

Anonymous said...

Hey COMMISSIONER Stamps, why don't you introduce an ordinance to set up a zoo poll booth on everyone entering Jackson on Lakeland from Flowood.

Anonymous said...

When did "restaurant" and "hotel" become verbs?

"[The zoo] will become an amenity of Flowood, where you will dine, and restaurant, and hotel..."

If my 6-year old spoke like that I'd be embarrassed.

Anonymous said...

OK, then by this logic we should move the Mississippi Children's Museum, the Mississippi Museum of Natural Science, the Ag Museum, and the Mississippi Sports Hall of Fame.

We all know what you mean, DeKeither. We know EXACTLY what you mean.

Anonymous said...

"the monkeys used to be heard all over the community. The Lions used to roar in a sound that delighted the neighborhood children"--Councilman Stokes.

Anonymous said...

Apparently Stamps doesn't realize that three new hotels, one under construction, are being built less than a mile from the proposed site. Not to mention the new hotel at THE DISTRICT. You have more good restaurants in Jackson closer to the site than Flowood could ever dream of. You want fast food? Sure, head to the taco bell past Primos. How many children, grandchildren or relatives of patients in FIVE HOSPITALS would feel comfortable taking their families to the zoo at LeFleurs? A lot more than right now. Let's go see granny at Baptist this weekend and then go to the zoo....A relocated zoo would add more to the tax coffers in Jackson than 10 years at the current location. These clowns are clueless.

Anonymous said...

I live in Jackson. I support the zoo, financially and otherwise. This is one of the most illogical and absurd responses conceivable, yet still only the second-dumbest response to moving the zoo (see Stokes). It is really disheartening and illustrative of how incompetent these morons are. Even those of us who have stuck around have started to think there is no coming back from this stupidity.

Pedro said...

The City of Jackson is so far gone that there is no hope, none, left for anything of any substance whatsoever.
The city's leadership is a very stupid joke that is not funny even though they appear as clowns.
The collective IQ of the council and mayor's office, excepting Shelby Foote, is under 100,... and I'm not so sure about Shelby deciding he wanted a spot on this godforsaken stage.
Jackson is a mini Detroit in stark, vivid technicolor. Pitiful, pitiful, pitiful.

Anonymous said...

Flowood. Lol. When I think of Flowood, I think of an all you can eat buffet, Ruby Tuesdays and Applebees.

Anonymous said...

It will take tremendous courage and selflessness to save Jackson. Mr. Stamps and most of his comrades only have personal ambition and bitterness to offer the city in place of leadership. A hard decision must be made about the FUTURE of the Jackson Zoo. Stamps and his ilk want to make decisions about the zoo's past which was obviously clouded in the racial bigotry that permeated everything in Jackson's past. That's done. Time to move on. If the zoo can survive and be successful in it's present location, leave it be. Support it and enhance it. If it can't survive and thrive in west Jackson, as it's own administrators seem to think, then make a tough decision and move it. If you can. Stop pandering to the emotions of people who have been hurt by the past and move Jackson forward. If you keep talking and do nothing the matter will soon be moot. The damn zoo will close anyway and you won't have the money or the support to build another one. But, maybe that's what you want. You can then blame somebody else for that and get reelected!

Anonymous said...

why is Jackson stuck in reverse example number 1. If we move the zoo people might start going to it

Anonymous said...

What a waste of time this is. Do any of you actually live in Jackson? The country is getting screwed by a lier and you are worrying about what a Jackass Ciy coucilman says. Shame on you Kingfish. Just once I would like to see you expand their horizons. I know most of these simpletons are pro Liar, but let's talk about that. Maybe we can enlighten them before the bubble gets busted in November.

Anonymous said...

Reuters/Ipsos: Democrats lose ground with millennials

Enthusiasm for the Democratic Party is waning among millennials as its candidates head into the crucial midterm congressional elections, according to the Reuters/Ipsos national opinion poll.
.....
Terry Hood, 34, an African-American who works at a Dollar General store in Baton Rouge, Louisiana and took this year’s poll, said he voted for Democrat Hillary Clinton in the 2016 presidential election.

But he will consider a Republican for Congress because he believes the party is making it easier to find jobs and he applauds the recent Republican-led tax cut.

“It sounds strange to me to say this about the Republicans, but they’re helping with even the small things,” Hood said in a phone interview. “They’re taking less taxes out of my paycheck. I notice that.”

Anonymous said...

Has it escaped most that Stokes referred to Stamps as a Punk? I would think Stokes has more insight into that possibility than 95% of us do.

Anonymous said...

Oh, you posted an opinion that Jackson sucks. Never seen that here before.

Anonymous said...

April 30, 2018 at 5:26 PM says:

What a waste of time this is. Do any of you actually live in Jackson? The country is getting screwed by a lier and you are worrying about what a Jackass Ciy coucilman says. Shame on you Kingfish. Just once I would like to see you expand their horizons. I know most of these simpletons are pro Liar, but let's talk about that. Maybe we can enlighten them before the bubble gets busted in November.

Your attempted condescension notwithstanding, this is JACKSON Jambalaya. The majority of people here are black and likely not "pro Liar" as you put it.

But, let's take your suggestion at face value. You suggest that people should ignore their immediate area in favor of discussing a topic to which their personal input has the least, with exception to other countries. Maybe if more people would take care of their own back yards then the country would take care of itself regardless what name resides in the White House for 4-8 years.

Anonymous said...

This attitude is what has plagued Jackson for too many years. While surrounding areas bear a partial responsibility for how they address Jackson, the fact that black leaders in Jackson have ALWAYS cut their noses off to spite their faces needs to be discussed.

I'm tired of my black leaders worried if whitey is going to benefit or might get something. For once I would like to see a strong black man be a leader in Jackson and lead without blame. Do the things it takes to bring everyone together instead of the feudalistic bickering over where the zoo should be, what percentage of contracts are to black businesses or the fear that white birds will receive some sort of benefit, even though black folk will also.

Anonymous said...

Despite the extra $6-7 in their paycheck most folks I know regret voting for Trump, If there was a do over of the Republican primaries someone other that Trump would be president. It wouldn't be Clinton either, the Russians made sure of that.

Anonymous said...

"Mr. Mayor, They're going to take your zoo." I didn't know that Flowood had annexed Lakeland Drive west to I-55.

"This isn't a race issue...this isn't about race."

Riiiiiiiight.......

You read it here first: many whites will give up (or be told to go away), the shrinking of outside funding for the zoo will accelerate, and in ten years there will no longer be a zoo in Jackson. Stamps, Stokes and company will point fingers and accept no blame for the zoo's demise.
j

Anonymous said...

Thank you, 7.17 PM, you beat me to it in response to the clown at 5.26.

5.26, I'm sure that there are plenty of other blog sites where you can post your displeasure with our current president, but as has been pointed out to you, the very title of this blog indicates its subject matter. If you don't care to discuss matters relevant to Jackson and surrounding areas, feel free to move on.

Anonymous said...

It's a lost cause 5:26, these poor saps have been bitching about Jackson all their lives. You have about as much chance of raising the ACT scores in this state to 21, as you can get them to see they depend on Jackson just as much as the Federal tax dollars from DC.

Anonymous said...

WOW....but it's a 2 way street.....I have always felt that alot of the ills that plague Jackson, will eventually slide into suburbia, therefor, if suburbia would admit that Jackson is the "Urban" epicenter, and they need Jackson to do a great job at all things urban; and Jackson would admit that it is surrounded by suburbia, and they need suburbia to do a great thing at all things suburbia, we would have a great COMMUNITY to live in together.....but alas, the Jackson City Council has proven to be at the opposite side of remotely capable of moderate thought processes, and suburbia, well, just read the comments.....I seriously think it would be OK if we supported one another and worked together

Anonymous said...

"The Haves and the Have Nots" Mr. Stamps says it all boils down to that. He's right. Jackson is fast becoming a city of predominantly Have-Nots. Black and White. So what do Have-Nots spend their meager funds on? Zoos? Golf Courses? Water Parks? Maybe some jewelry for the kids. Keep the zoo in west Jackson, that's the priority. While the streets are impassable, the schools are a disaster, and public works are practically non-existent we must spend hours and money we don't have on a zoo we can't afford so that the "Haves" don't get something else they CAN afford. Sometime you may have to allow the "Haves" to use their money to provide a public service so that everyone including the Have-Nots can enjoy it. Then maybe the Have-Nots can spend their money on things they really need. But then who would they blame for their problems?

Anonymous said...

5:07 When I think of Jackson, I think about a murder there almost every day, a lonesome downtown, streets (do I really need to mention them,,,really?), a city government that apparently doesn’t care if retail and corporate facilities leave for another (better?) place, oh, and apparently people such as you who are condescending folk trying to defend Jackson by attacking eating establishments other than Jackson’s own. Always the defense!...those fine restaurants that no one else has in their town.. And they are nice.
But pretty sure folks are bumper to bumper in three lanes on Lakeland Dr. leaving Jackson every afternoon to Flowood and parts beyond and around for more than the desire to live in a place with fancy restaurants. Maybe for quality schools, safe and smooth streets, a city government that makes sure the town is welcoming to all with the best parks, recreation, nice cafes and restaurants, a couple of the best city and county law enforcement agencies in the state and beyond, a nice mixture of retail, medical facilities that continue to grow and expand as large clinical facilities continue to leave Jackson to make their home in Flowood, a soon to be quality conference center and hotel with a neighboring tournament worthy golf course and an urban town center anchored by one of the fastest growing financial businesses in the state beginning construction this month.
5:07, why not stop by Primos in Flowood for dinner some late afternoon, have a seat by a window and watch the cars leaving Jackson to go to their homes for all the right reasons. You would be welcomed and pretty sure no one would be condescending toward you.

And did I read you wrote “Lol” in your comment? Really?? You can do better, I know you can!

Anonymous said...

As a black resident of Jackson for 30 years I can assure you that it is a city of the halves and have Nots. There is no reason areas of eastover and promos land that's full of wealthy people such as barksdale family and number of others are so much better off than the black areas of Jackson. Inequality is obvious. I work in the landscape business and these people spend more on there yards each year than blacks in Jackson make in a year. It's crazy and made me fully aware.

Anonymous said...

@ 5:49
The promos land your referring to is called Meadowbrook highlands. Berry high-end and nice area. Loads of money in there that's for sure... while I agree with some of your views I would advise you to look to reasons why these areas and people have money. It's not bc of race. Many of these people have 2nd homes on beach or in Oxford Mississippi. They didn't get where they are without hard work and sacrifice. Stop blaming race for your issues.

Anonymous said...

we should stop comparing Jackson to Detroit. Detroit hit rock bottom and has the leadership now to turn around, which it is. Jackson needs to let go of all this petty spite and do what’s best. And unfortunately for many, the best thing to do is move the zoo to a new location. Closing it is a loss for everyone. And yes the city council is far more concerned with a zoo than crime, education, infrastructure, economic development, and just anything actually important to growth of a city.

Anonymous said...



This discussion is nothing but a circle of talk. We always end up right back where we started with no progress.


The Zoo is a dying entity. It cannot be saved in its present location and Jackson can't afford a new one. Its over.

Anonymous said...

5:49 So what? Everyplace there are haves and have nots. Every city, every country. Go to Europe, go to Africa, go to Asia. There are rich people and poor people. In the public schools, there are some kids who are on their way to college and others who are on their way to prison. That's life. The point is, both sides of town need to work together instead of against each other so that everyone can enjoy those facilities dedicated to public use. What they do with their private property is their own business. If all you have is bitterness because other people are rich, you have doomed yourself to failure and regret. Don't do it! Get up off your own ass and improve your condition, You'll feel better!

Anonymous said...

Detroit and Jackson have nothing in common. Detroit has gained more whitenpopulation over past 2 years than any city in America including Atlanta and D.C. Detroit has so much development going on its unreal. Also a Republican white mayor. You can't compare the 2 cities what so ever. Also, the suburbs of Detroit support the city as,opposed to the suburbs of Jackson

Anonymous said...

Detroit has gained more whitenpopulation over past 2 years than any city in America including Atlanta and D.C.

Link?

Anonymous said...

7:56 is right--except he's a white democrat. Mike Duggan. Yes, I'm not making that up.

Flint is a better comparison. Crime ridden, broken infrastructure, leaders ignoring real problems, suburbs doing fine....

Anonymous said...

Just a thought, why doesn't Jackson set up radar on our side of the Pearl River bridge on Lakeland Drive? Flowood has been doing it for years and generating a nice income stream...

Anonymous said...

We will be having this same fight in a while about the civil rights museum. Once the new wears off and people get their obligatory one time visit out of the way, the local people will stop going. Face it, Jackson isn't a town full of culture, no matter how much you try. People here don't spend their money on zoo's or museums no matter where they are located(part of town). I bet if the zoo were to move to LeFluers Bluff, most people wouldn't go more that once to check it out then its over. You need repeat customers to keep the doors open on these type of things.

Anonymous said...

What the heck is "promos" land? Is it the promised land (Thank you, Jesus) or are you trying to say the old Primos land on Meadowbrook where the horses used to graze?

Anonymous said...

@ 8:08
Forgive me as I don't know how to post a link properly. However it's well documented. Also, I mentioned a Republican white mayor not for racial purposes but for mere facts of the changing city. Look up Cass park a new development that was a complete ghetto. Look at D.C. massive white population gains and also Atlanta.

bodiene said...

Yes is would help Flowood, we would be able to go to a zoo without being afraid for our life. We would be able to spend our money in Jackson.

Kingfish said...

OK 5:49, I'll bite.

Yes, that guy has a huge yard in Eastover. Guess what? He is probably paying a three or four man crew to do the yardwork every week. He is paying quite a bit in property taxes, which you have no problem seeing your city and county accepting that money. He has nice cars. Ok. If they are Lexus or Infiniti, he probably bought them in Jackson and paid alot of money in taxes to support the city and county.

Drive guys like that out and you will see paychecks and taxes disappear. Want to see that happen?

Anonymous said...

However it's well documented.

Prove it.

Anonymous said...

Why all the arguments about Detroit? The city is revitalized and it's easy to see especially once they hit rock bottom. My guess is Memphis is next. It's amazing the difference in Memphis and Nashville same state fee hours away.

Anonymous said...

The leadership of Jackson needs to quit the bickering over black and white and start focusing on one color - green. Development dollars, city contracts- all green. Bring in the most green on good development projects regardless of it comes from a black or white wallet and spend the least green when spending city dollars on efficient quality contractors regardless the color of the hand signing the contract. The zoo is only the latest example of monochrome decision making.

Anonymous said...

5:49 I don't believe you are black or work in the landscape business because if you did you would be glad there are "haves" who can afford to pay big bucks for your type of service. If you want to run the rich folks out of town the least of your problems will be a damn zoo.

Jackson's Track Record said...

MISSISSIPPI DEPARTMENT OF REVENUE
DIVERSIONS TO CITIES FROM SALES TAX COLLECTIONS

Jackson
March 2017 = $2,453,411
March 2018 = $2,323,447
YOY = -5.29%

Flowood
March 2017 = $875,968
March 2018 = $909,563
YOY = +3.83%

Ridgeland
March 2017 = $1,019,472
March 2018 = $1,099,837
YOY = +7.88%

Madison
March 2017 = $607,166
March 2018 = $667,939
YOY = +10.01%

Anonymous said...

Thus whole blog is about black & white & that Jackson is being held back by whites.
The real issue is about crime! No crime no need to move ZOO.
Here's a great interactive link to prove my point.

http://www.msnewsnow.com/category/329842/jackson-homicides

Study it & look to see what area in Jackson is suffering the most from crime.

I rest my case consuler.

Anonymous said...

The city is revitalized and it's easy to see especially once they hit rock bottom. My guess is Memphis is next. It's amazing the difference in Memphis and Nashville same state fee hours away.

Memphis has made a significant improvement in the last 20 years. Beale Street, the Memphis Grizzlies, the Red Birds, the numerous festivals. Memphis is in a good place and headed in the right direction. It's not comparable to Nashville, but Memphis is in way better shape than Jackson and that's with help from the State Capitol.

Mississippi is just flat out trifling. There are just too many warring factions internally and the citizens pay dearly for it.

People in this state marvel at how other places are thriving and the conditions, but when they come home to Mississippi, they never ask their elected officials to consider implementing anything they've come across in other places.

This place is a drain and that is why our best and brightest run the hell up out of here on the first thing caught smoking.

Anonymous said...

Stamps and stokes both remind me of that loud mouf dad of the NBA player for the lakers... last name is Ball... complete ignorance and when you think they can't get anymore obnoxious they take it to a whole new level... Carlos the clown as well...

Anonymous said...

The word is gentrification. Most ghettos need it to survive. There, I said it. If the majority of the constituents are "getting checks", then you need some people who "earn checks" to actually spend it and get it in the tax base.

F mickns said...

What a dumb thing for Councilman Stamps to say!

Anonymous said...

I once thought stamps was decent and gave him a chance. After this comment I can assure you I would never want him to speak in public again. I live in Jackson and have a rental business in flowood. This man is a total nut.

Anonymous said...

I've changed my mind about moving the the Jackson Zoo anywhere.

Close the damn zoo and get those poor animals out of there.



Anonymous said...

"Why all the arguments about Detroit? The city is revitalized and it's easy to see especially once they hit rock bottom."

This didn't happen until the city was taken over completely by the state. Jackson pols will do anything they can to prevent that here.

Anonymous said...

Revenue for zoos are down all over. It's just like sea world... it was once a big attraction and now it's nearly on life support. Due to technology and aquariums as well as other realistic attractions younger generations sadly enough aren't interested in real life animal exhibits... similar to movie theaters nationwide.

Anonymous said...

Talk about helping Flowood? Let’s talk about helping Jackson.

Every time I drive by Winners Circle Park it see many citizens that sure are not from Flowood using that facility for free.

Let’s close it down to protect the neighborhood.

Anonymous said...

F mickns said... What a dumb thing for Councilman Stamps to say!

Most people would say...What a dumb thought process to have!

My money is on mickns agreeing with DeKeef but thinking he shouldn't have verbalized it.

Anonymous said...

@ 6:19
Winners park circle has changed due to the apartments near it and directly next to it. Also some of the neighborhoods there are changing a bit demographically speaking.

Anonymous said...

9:36

“demographically speaking”. Sounds like dog whistle racism.

If the users don’t pay property taxes in Flowood they should not be able to use he park.

I don’t think renters pay property tax.

Anonymous said...

Hatred of the prosperous surrounds permeates each department and authority controlled by the CoJ.

Anonymous said...

1:58
Plenty of prosperous people live in the city of Jackson. Look at many families in the eastover area beach house on Martha's vineyard over worth over 21 million and many other very very well off families.

Anonymous said...

12:12 suggests Memphisto is on some sort of socio-cultural rebound. He obviously is unaware of the thousands of new home starts and existing home purchases that have flooded bordering Mississippi counties going now on fifteen years with no end in sight - and the number of those who have jobs in Tennessee. Nobody but nobody is moving to Memphisto. Nobody.

That's about as damned idiotic as suggesting New Orleans is enjoying a positive trend based on booze sales in the Quarter.

Anonymous said...

2:37. Check census estimates. Google it. Memphis, the city, is growing. So are the suburbs. They aren’t mutually exclusive. It’s funny that in places so close by they want everyone to do well. That just might work here..

Anonymous said...

With no economic income, who the hell Jackson think can bring businesses to Jackson. It sure isn't the people on the city council. With no insight how to get things done in this STATE, for the greater good of Jackson. Just ignorant. Where the Hell we gone get development from, show aint from my aunt burger shack. With that crazy talk, what major retailer will even think about moving to Jackson. Just like the Costco. Costco would rather fight Ridgeland, than work with these JOKERS on our Council. No quality of life in Jackson. Move the freaking Zoo, And build around an area that is comfortable for everyone. Hell, there's blacks folks who don't even want to go to current location, and people that do, bite the bullet just to try to support. NO PLAN!

Anonymous said...

Nope. Google it.

Anonymous said...

"2:37. Check census estimates. Google it. Memphis, the city, is growing. So are the suburbs. They aren’t mutually exclusive. It’s funny that in places so close by they want everyone to do well."

Surely you don't believe your own bullshit. The only thing that is increasing the population in Memphis is the HUD subsidized apartments. Give us a link to new neighborhood developments, subdivisions and housing starts.

YES...Memphis and its suburbs, like Jackson and its outlying municipal areas are indeed 'mutually exclusive'. Not all of us fell of the same 'bean wagon' you rode in on last nite.

Anonymous said...

@3:41 Amen! You said it!

Anonymous said...

I stated 2 weeks ago that Stamps and Stokes were like-minded. Stamps is more articulate and nuanced, but they essentially play to the same base of constituents who see anything that will bring white suburbanites to Jackson, or appeal to them in any way, as a threat.

Anonymous said...

9:39, I think you are correct. The crazy thing is, that the black community blames whites for not supporting Jackson, but their elected officials make it clear that whites are neither wanted nor needed in Jackson.

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


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Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

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