Saturday, August 12, 2017

Shock and awe

WOW!!! Team Targaryen showed up after getting knocked around for a few weeks.  No more misdirection plays or reverses.  Dany used the try and stop it offense and unfortunately for the Lannisters, no one figured out how to stop an honest-to-goodness fire-breathing dragon backed up by a Mongol horde.  Some thoughts on "Spoils of War".

*This was definitely a top-five episode.  It didn't quite best Hardhomme or the Red Wedding.  Hardhomme was just pure shock delivered every other second.  There is a reason no music played during the ending credits.  The Rains of Castermere (Red Wedding) delivered a similar blow to the psyche.  The Red Wedding was a plot twist no one saw coming but boy did it deliver.  The Winds of Winter delivered a series of staggering punches as well.    The horrors of war were shown all too well in Spoils of War.  One moment the Lannister soldiers are lined up in their pretty Lannister armor looking oh so soldierly and then are complete ashes in the next moment.  The scene did a great job of showing the shock and awe experienced by Jaime and his cohorts as they struggled to comprehend what was happening right in front of them.

*Bronn.  The man did it all.  Saved Jaime, wounded a dragon (was that bolt poisoned?), coined a new term- "fancy lad school", and still got screwed over by Jaime.  "Castle I promised you? What Castle?"  He deserves this award:

*Arya.  Our little assassin fought Brienne to a duel although I thought she was toying with Brienne at times.  Think about that.  Little Arya is playing with one of the best sword fighters in Westeros.  The Valerian dagger looked like it belonged on her as well.  However, one reviewer on Watchers on the Wall referred to her as "f'ed up" because she is quite the assassin.  Oh really? Let's take a look at Arya.

Her father was beheaded in front of her although her head was turned away by someone else.  She has been captured several times. She was enslaved.  She makes it to the Twins only to find her mother and brother butchered while most of the Stark army is wiped out.  The Hound kidnaps her and hauls her around the countryside.

The truth is Arya lives in a very dark world.  Will Durant wrote that Christianity softened the downfall of the Roman Empire as the barbarians had adopted the faith.  There was no such softening in GRRM's world. Good people who can't defend themselves are easy prey and often suffer the fate of such prey.  Arya learned some harsh lessons at a very young age.  She grew on the streets instead of a castle.  She was forced to adapt, improvise and overcome.   Only the strong and the cunning survive in her world.  However, keep in mind Arya has a code.  She doesn't kill anyone who doesn't deserve it and has spared innocents such as Lady Frey when she could have killed them.  Turning the other cheek in this universe means you exposed your neck to a sword.  One wonders if the female reviewers at the Washington Post and Watchers on the Wall would feel such anguish if Arya was a boy.

*Bran Muadib Stark.  Bran died from information overload but we still don't know what took his place.   Bran is now the Three-Eyed Raven but it seems there is very little Bran left.  It is similar to the path taken by Paul Atreides.  Paul was another gifted member of a royal house until he went through The Agony.  He gained the power to see the past and the future.  However, the transformation made him more distant, cold-blooded, calculating as his power to feel fell away from his soul.

*Jaime.  He lived but was he captured?  What would Danyres do with him? Hostage? Payback for killing the Mad King? Demand allegiance? Did the Tarlys survive? Dany might want to wear some armor the next time she visits the battlefield.  One well-placed arrow would have added another description to her long list of titles: dead.

*What was that little mention of the Golden Company by Cersai? Does she intend to hire the Golden Company? Does she mean to use them to wipe out the North? Attack the Dothraki or Unsullied? Or will she use it to wipe out Bravos?

*Littlefinger.  Bran knows when he has been bad or good.  Does he make Littlefinger be good for goodness sakes or does he out him to the rest of the Starks? His little lie about that dagger started a whole war.  He also knows that Littlefinger was behind the death of Joffery and Cersai's imprisonment which led to the Walk of Shame.  Run, Lord Baelish, Run.  

The New Rockstars posted its usual entertaining recap:

while Alt Shift X provides his usual concise but penetrating commentary. 


Anonymous said...

I love Ser Bronn.

Hope he survives.

Anonymous said...


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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).

Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.

In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS