Thursday, January 26, 2017

Bourbon Street Blues

Hurricane Katrina didn't destroy Bourbon Street but will Bourbon Street survive New Orleans Mayor Mitch Landrieu after he announced that he wants to make some changes to the Bourbon Street scene?  The New Orleans Morning Advocate reported:

An unprecedented number of electronic eyes will soon be deployed throughout New Orleans, watching over 20 different neighborhoods, tracking vehicles to assist police as they search for suspects and scanning French Quarter revelers to look for hidden weapons.

The massive security deployment, part of a $40 million crime-prevention plan unveiled Monday, includes pumping public and private video feeds into a centralized New Orleans Police Department command center that will be monitored around the clock.

“Here’s the first thing I want everyone to know: When you go on Bourbon Street now, everything you do will be seen,” Mayor Mitch Landrieu said.

The proposal, drafted in the wake of a shooting on Bourbon Street on Thanksgiving weekend that left one person dead and nine wounded, also calls for efforts to tamp down on the atmosphere of street partying and entertainment that often overtakes areas of the Quarter into the early morning hours.

While no closing times will be imposed, bars across the city will be required to keep their doors closed after 3 a.m. to discourage patrons from spilling outside, and an early morning spraying of Bourbon Street will further discourage revelry there.....
On Bourbon Street, a 3 a.m. cleaning that “flushes” the street is planned — apparently similar to the sweep that formally ends Fat Tuesday — with a police escort that could make some consider going inside.

The new rules for bars and some other provisions will have to be approved by the City Council. Those rules would apply citywide and, in addition to crime concerns, are aimed at addressing neighborhood complaints about loud bars and music.... Rest of article.

Vehicles will be barred from the first eight blocks of Bourbon Street; movable bollards will allow emergency vehicles and delivery trucks through when needed.

The plan also calls for increasing regulations on strip clubs and live entertainment venues in the French Quarter and further restricting performers at Jackson Square, while “rebranding the French Quarter and Bourbon Street’s image as a cultural destination.”

Enjoy it while you can. 


Anonymous said...

New Orleans is a sewer.

Anonymous said...

Las Vegas has made extreme efforts to rebrand itself as "family friendly" while still maintaining the sin city mantra. They realized that a reputation for safety and broad based entertainment venues will only increase their already huge profits. New Orleans has a tougher time branding the French Quarter as "family friendly" but at least they can put an emphasis on safety, which is still probably a tough sell. But at least they're trying.

Anonymous said...

Every city in the south over 100,000 people is a sewer. Think about it. But at least New Orleans is fun, has deep culture and great food.

Anonymous said...

But New Orleans is the biggest sewer in the south.

Anonymous said...

This, is an unfortunate response for the safety of the patrons. Probably should have been proposed years ago.

No Beads For Me Thank You said...

The idea here is to make criminals uneasy. Everybody already knows what all the revelers are doing so there are no hidden surprises or efforts there to change their behavior. The income of that region of the state depends on the revelers, not the criminals.

Anonymous said...

Hopefully that late night spraying of the streets will do something to ease that maggot-gagging stench that always fills the air in the late night/early morning hours.

Anonymous said...

Leave the strip clubs alone.

Anonymous said...

Can't flush the smell of piss and regret off that street; it's in the soil by now.

Anonymous said...

The city council has to approve such an ordinance which will never happen.

And LAs Vegas wishes it had never spent a dime trying to attract broke kids and wives....lament it daily.

Dudes with hard legs and dollars drive those towns.

Funny thing is when banks got robbed we didn't close the banks.....we made them harder to rob.

Somebody will institute mobile metal detectors and random frisks....which will deter crime.....but the bars are not about to close their doors or stop selling booze at 3 am.......

Take a Whiff. Now Another.. said...

Where you have horses, you have the smell of piss. Get over it 8:41 and 9:05. If you don't want to smell poontang stay out of the whore house.

Anonymous said...

@10:08. Closing the doors does not equal closing the bar and last call. The flawed logic is that the drunk tourist will not walk through an open door. Neither will a bad guy storming the bar with guns blazing. He would have to open the door first.

Anonymous said...

Big Brother will be watching and Alternate Facts and silencing government employees from providing information will give us an alternate reality.

Crime is the lowest it's been in decades but Big Brother will eliminate crime and redefine what is criminal.

Perhaps we'll all have uniforms soon as well with badges indicating what our status is in society.

Orwell was off 100 years but by 2024 we should all be walking in lock step and the Wall to keep others out will keep us in.

Manly yes, but I like it too said...

I guess the homeless people begging for change, passed out on every corner will now get a daily shower at 3am

Anonymous said...

oh yeah? I remember when cameras were installed in the Bold New City in an effort to save lives at major intersections and curtail speeders (Lakeland Dr. @ Ridgewood as an example) When the good peoples of Jackson whined and bitched about being held accountable for their reckless driving habits by said carmeras the esteemed "leaders" trotted out and ordered them removed or disconnected and pointed skyward.

Anonymous said...


Impeding flow of drunks to more drink is the same thing as stopping them from serving at 3 am.

Don't think this wasn't contemplated.

Bourbon at 3 am is a zombie fest and if you make the place "look" like it's closed...well people go to bed.

That's why even on hot days the doors are wide open.

Anonymous said...

If you have any questions as to if this is a good or bad idea, follow NOLA news on facebook. Post Katrina bourbon street has gotten bad, especially in warmer weather. So what, they have cameras. If you're afraid your tits will show up, or you'll get caught with your mistress down there, then don't do it. Other than that, most law abiding citizens should want these. These cops aren't worried about a little partying, they are worried about some hood rats doing hood rat stuff. On the cars, have you seen how many "donks" are parked with ood rats posted up cat calling and harassing every decent looking woman around? The place has gone downhill drastically since Katrina. Even the strip club hustlers in the streets have gotten sleazier(and that's saying something).

Anonymous said...

9:03am is an example of the ignorance that so pervasive in modern Americans.

If my tits show up or I'm caught with my mistress, are not legal issues for the city of New Orleans or any government entity. If I pick my nose and eat the fruit, it's no one's business. Just because one is in public, does not mean that their right to privacy is removed.

The fence of privacy is obviously smaller in public, but not removed.... except for modern Americans' sense of riding that sled down the slippery slope of "most law abiding citizens should want their rights removed or violated".

If you're afraid of some hood rats doing hood rats stuff, donks parked with hood rats or sleazy strip club hustlers, then don't visit. Your perceptions does not trump others' rights.

Anonymous said...

I haven't been there since it was flushed a few years ago. The last time it was flushed it spread crap all over the U.S. If it is worse now imagine what will happen the next time it is flushed.

Anonymous said...


You disgust me. You probably call yourself a "conservative" as well.

“Those who surrender freedom for security will not have, nor do they deserve, either one.”

― Benjamin Franklin

Not even trying to break down your idiotic circumstantial based argument, of course the probably / risk is greater if there are no cameras tracking your every move. That's the definition of freedom.

You need to look at absolute percentages-- if the chance of an event occurring on Bourbon is currently 1.7% and it is reduced to 1.3%--that's worth giving up your privacy for? You're crazy.

We can walk around with guns on our hips and get arrested for a beer in our hands.

Anonymous said...

Anyone know what those little white trailers are sitting around the quarter?

Yellow Umbrella said...

Oh, you mean the ones with the blue AT&T logos. AT&T generator/work trailers. The little yellow light on top is a dead give-away.

Anonymous said...

Having been in New Orleans when National Championships were won, the celebrations on Bourbon Street were glorious and went on all night without any incident of significance. Hate to think what the closed doors at 3am would signal to out of state fans. I suspect they'd assume the joint was closed.
When I go as a tourist, I've more sense than to be on Bourbon Street that late and am vigilant.
I've loved and enjoyed NOLA before and after Katrina. But, the bottom line is that the Governor should not be dictating to the city.
Ironic that those who don't want a heavy handed federal government can't see why a heavy handed State is just as bad.
More ironic still is that Landrieu's playing to the paranoia of his base about crime isn't an obvious hint of his national ambitions. Crime is at it's lowest in decades inside and outside of NOLA. But, if all you do is watch/read sensationalism and politicized BS that passes as news, I guess you don't know that.
PS, in the glorious past, you didn't hear much about crimes in other states and cities. It had to be a major crime with national implications to make national headlines as there just wasn't time until news was 24 hours and reporters had to fill time.
Frankly, life was better when we minded our own business and didn't panic about everyone else's business! NOLA should get to decide their way to do things and if I don't like what they decide, I don't have to go.

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).

Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.

In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS