Friday, November 13, 2020

Tate Will Fight Any Federal Lockdown Orders

 Governor Tate Reeves said he would "fight" any Biden administration attempts to shut down Mississippi's economy after some of Mr. Biden's Covid-19 advisers promoted a six-week massive national shut down.  Yahoo Finance News reported yesterday: 

As the U.S. continues to set new daily record highs of coronavirus cases, at least one doctor on President-elect Joe Biden’s coronavirus task force is floating the idea of shutting down businesses in a lockdown that could last four to six weeks to control the spread of the pandemic.

In a Wednesday interview with Yahoo Finance Live, Dr. Michael Osterholm, who currently serves as director of the Center of Infectious Disease Research and Policy at the University of Minnesota, stressed that the country is in a position to pay its workers to stay home.

“We could pay for a package right now to cover all of the lost wages for individual workers, for losses to small companies, to medium-sized companies or city, state, county governments. We could do all of that,” he said. “If we did that, then we could lock down for four to six weeks and if we did that, we could drive the numbers down.”

Osterholm, who was named to President-elect Biden’s Covid-19 12-person advisory board on Monday, pointed to the August New York Times op-ed he co-wrote with Minneapolis Federal Reserve President Neel Kashkari which argued for more restrictive lockdowns across the nation. In the op-ed, the duo argued that nations that had locked down effectively and completely until the virus fully subsided emerged in a much better position than the U.S., which only partially locked down in a few regions before re-opening too quickly, they said.... Rest of article

 

The Mississippi Governor was having none of it as he stood up against any federal lockdown mandates. 

 

 

(15:19 in video for start of Governor's remarks on lockdowns.)

 The Governor said Dr. Osterholm's advocacy of a six-week lockdown was "totally and completely beyond all reasonableness. People in Mississippi just can't go home and shut down their businesses, shut down their restaurants, shut down their gyms, shut down other small businesses for six weeks and think that you could come back six weeks from now and flip a switch (snaps his fingers) and everything is going to be fine. It's not the way the economy works." 

He said "under the Stafford Act", emergencies have to be managed by the states and federally supported. The Governor said there was no constitutional or statutory authority for the federal government to shut down Mississippi's economy. "We will certainly fight that if it becomes necessary," said the Governor. 

The Wall Street Journal indirectly supported Governor Reeves on its editorial page this morning: 

 Did they learn anything from the spring and events since? Lockdowns don’t crush the virus. They merely delay its spread until the lockdowns end. Targeted restrictions on people and businesses may be needed in an emergency in some locations to prevent hospitals from being overrun—though even then the government can surge medical resources, as is now happening in El Paso. 

 The costs of severe lockdowns are horrendous. The U.S. is still recovering from the spring catastrophe when the jobless rate surged in two months to 14.7%, the highest since the Great Depression. Tens of thousands of businesses closed and many will never reopen.

The human cost is even worse. A quarter of 18- to 24-year-olds have reported suicidal thoughts and increased substance abuse. Half of them reported symptoms consistent with a depressive disorder, according to a Centers for Disease Control and Prevention survey in June. Some 13% of Americans said they started or increased substance use to cope with the pandemic.

This awful advice arrives as the economy continues to recover from the first shutdowns. Third-quarter growth was a record 33.1% and the fourth quarter has started strong. Continuing jobless claims fell again in Thursday’s weekly report by another 436,000, and new claims by 48,000. The U.S. has recovered more than half of the jobs it lost, and the jobless rate has fallen to 6.9%. Where would we be now if we’d have taken Dr. Osterholm’s advice in August, or Dr. Emanuel’s in June?

Covid cases are accelerating, to a worrying degree in some places. Hospitalizations are rising, and deaths will follow, though many fewer per infection than in the spring thanks to clinical advances in treating the disease. But we should have learned by now that the best response to these surges is to protect the vulnerable, maintain social-distance protocols and wear masks when in close quarters indoors while getting on as much as possible with normal life, education and commerce

Kingfish note: The Governor is right to resist a massive federal lockdown.   There is no cure for the Covid-19 virus.  Lockdowns only suppress the spread as infections shoot right back up when lockdowns ends.  There is no vaccine for the virus although Pfizer announced a promising one this week.  However, distribution will take some time. We don't know how effective it will be against various strains and mutations. Does it generate a short-lived  antibody response or a more permanent T-cell response? Get the idea? They are basing lockdowns on a hope.  Period. 

Sometimes in life, there are not just any good answers.  If we shut down, we wreck the economy.  The economy is not a thing but rather a collection of lives, all interconnected.  Dr. Osterholm is a perfect example of why one shouldn't let experts be in total control.  What our leaders should do is balance the expert advice of the Osterholms versus experts from other disciplines such as the economists at NBER to determine the appropriate policy.  

A shutdown means people lose their lives, drug addiction and suicides increase, health care suffers, and more catastrophe visits upon us.  If we continue with targeted lockdowns and sensible policies, the cost of covid-19 remains but we haven't committed national suicide either.  We are screwed either way.  Which choice screws us the less is the question that should be asked.  

Let's take a look at this issue and ignore the rhetoric.  Suppose Biden ordered a shutdown.  How does he enforce it.  Without federal troops, the federal government does not have the manpower to enforce such an edict if a large bloc of Governors ignored such an order.  Under New York v. US, the federal government can not directly order the local constabulary to enforce federal mandates.  The shutdown talk is just that - talk.  It is talk from two advisors.  The task force hasn't recommended any shutdown nor has Biden said there would be a shutdown.

Make no mistake, I have tremendous respect for Dr. Osterholm. He knows his stuff.  I used to post his podcasts and interviews on this website.  However, I noticed a few things about him over the summer.  He was appearing on tv just a little bit too much (Gottleib does this too).  He was a strong proponent of keeping the schools open.  I posted an interview back in the spring where he took a very hardline position on sending kids to school during the pandemic.  Then this summer he changed his tune.  Uh-huh.  I can tell when someone is loving the media just a little too much and changing his message to fit the medium. I frankly think he is becoming quite the media hound while auditioning for a role with the Biden administration. 

73 comments:

Anonymous said...

We are where we are. Thanks Donald.

Anonymous said...

Tate Reeves for Guv 2024! Campaign slogan: “Defeating science and good sense with mah freedumbs!”

Anonymous said...

Everyone needs to pray for the economy.

Anonymous said...

Ummmmmm uhhhhhhhh yeah

If you could actually get my fellow rednecks to wear a mask in public—-even after you order a mask “mandate”, that would be a great start!

Keep playing stupid and the feds will be forced to act——and you’ll resist for political reasons. After all of the abuses on executive orders since the W admin—continuing with O, then T——we tried warn you. Good luck with that mess.

Anonymous said...

No POTUS can enforce mandatory nat'l lockdown.

Anonymous said...

Tate's plan is just good common sense. It is not rocket science. Anyone who thinks a lock down is a good thing is just looking for more handouts from the government. Working people know the truth.

Anonymous said...

A federal mask mandate is absurd. Tate is right. That should be an individual state’s decision.

Anonymous said...

He will fight it unless Trump orders it. If Trump orders it, Tate will kiss his ass in five seconds flat and shut the state down.

Anonymous said...

bring back the mask mandate and be done with it. that’s about all we really need.

Anonymous said...

While I agree with Tate that a 6-week shut down would be wrong, I hope Tate requires a state-wide face mask mandate soon. After Thanksgiving, this could get much worse after family gathering.

Anonymous said...

All you Trump supporters shouldn't be concerned.Your hero has told us " there's nothing to worry about ",we've "turned the corner," the "virus will soon disappear."
If Trump had dealt with it earlier the virus would be largely behind us and a lot more people would be alive.

Buy Ammo - if you can find it said...

It's not just a nationwide lockdown. The feds would pay everyone, every single person, any and all lost income. Now the ignorant entitlement crowd thinks that would be fantastic. FREE MONEY! It grows on trees, right?

Fire up the Fed's printing presses! Are the money trees evergreens?

This would likely double or triple the national debt that would never be paid off. Never! Can you say inflation? Civil unrest? Riots? Looting? Marshal law? Depression v2.0? Stock market crash?

All of those temporarily closed businesses (100s of thousands of them), would be looted, burned, destroyed!

LOCK and LOAD with Biden!!!!

Anonymous said...

@10:28 am
Why not thank Donald for the flu and common cold while you're at it. It's a virus. Try a little common sense.

Anonymous said...

@ November 13, 2020 at 10:28 AM
If you are talking about things like $1.59 for gasoline and a good economy, lowering the food stamp society and getting rid of ISIS, you are correct. However, if you are one of those simple minded snowflakes who believes Trump went to China's bat cave, got some bat juice and spread it all over the world, well......

Anonymous said...

The good doctor clarified his statement.
And, he pointed out the obvious, that he's just one member of a larger group.

The more likely, and the sensible approach is targeting outbreaks for shutdown and increasing testing and quarantine follow up.

It is way past time to stop politicizing a pandemic and start dealing with it!

Try to behave like responsible grownups and not spoiled brats.

Anonymous said...

@11:16 You wrote: "......If Trump had dealt with it earlier the virus would be largely behind us and a lot more people would be alive......." Are you REALLY that naive or do you just hate Trump that much? He, irrefutably, took early actions, over which Biden excoriated him, and those actions proved to be exactly what were needed, actions that saved many lives! Did he make 100% correct calls? No. But neither would have Biden. It's a "novel" (new) virus, remember? Many questions have been answered during the time since it arrived only one year ago......and do you think Biden would have presided over the quickest vaccine in human history? Not a chance. He's of the party of restrictions and red tape.

Look, I know it's easy to hate Trump. I get it. I'm as conservative as you can get, and I'm not a big fan (of the man). That being said, he did a FAR better job for the PEOPLE of this country than Obama or Bush. That's verifiable through the statistics, not the rhetoric.......I'm definitely more anti-Biden than I am pro-Trump. If the Republicans lose the Senate, you'll be praying for Trump to return.....

Anonymous said...

Constitution? What's that? We got us Biden-Harris! We don't need no Constitution!

PittPanther said...

Instead of saying "lockdowns don't work," can someone point to the countries that implemented full, federal lockdowns, and show us that their covid numbers have now gone back up?

Because the USA didn't implemented a real lockdown, we half-a$$ed it, so of course it didn't work.

Anonymous said...

The New England Journal of Medicine is questioning the validity of wearing masks in hospitals and JJ posters think Tater is a goob for not sucking the kool-aid.

It's all about the science right? Remember that per AOC science says the world has only three years left to exist.

Anonymous said...

Piss on Tate.

I cannot wait for Biden to start to assist cities like Jackson directly.....cutting the state out entirely.

New infrastructure will be nice.

Go Joe.

Anonymous said...

Those calling for a complete lockdown are in the small minority. On the other hand, targeted restrictions are not unreasonable. To the extent the health departments can cut through the noise of the almost complete, uncontrolled community spread and identify specific activities that are higher risk then limiting or shutting them down may be a good idea.

That's the problem with too many people. They hear "lockdown" and think it has to be all or nothing. It isn't that way at all, and people smarter than them can actually think on a higher level and prioritize among multiple options.

Anonymous said...

1232, is this the article you reference, incorrectly?

https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMp2006372?fbclid=IwAR3e3YY1COf9EsWYArX_XZzZLQglrjQu5D4fDXNxiy68Rb9KODhc-pb1wBE


Did you happen to read the follow-up comments from the authors, also in NEJM?

https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMc2020836

Or this article addressing the issue?

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/factcheck/2020/07/22/fact-check-new-england-journal-medicine-article-face-masks-coronavirus-covid-19-spread/5454384002/

Or this latest update (today) from CDC?

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/prevent-getting-sick/cloth-face-cover-guidance.html

Just a few observations from a guy that happens to do this for a living.

Anonymous said...

Funny how the friends of mine who have been the most vocal supporters of lockdowns are in positions where they have absolutely nothing to lose from it. They have also been the ones who continued to regularly travel far and wide through the whole pandemic.

Anonymous said...

Facts matter, Trump screwed the response to Corona.
I agree National Mask Mandates and Shutdowns won't work.
If he would have acknowledged the dangers in the beginning,appealed to common sense and ASKED people to wear mask and social distance he could have saved thousands of lives.

Anonymous said...

Finally someone with a backbone. COVID is all about control. It is extremely rare to die from COVID unless you are elderly or have preexisting condition. Hint- if you are elderly or have preexisting condition, take extra precautions. The rest of us need to live our lives.

Anonymous said...

"Suppose Biden ordered a shutdown." But he didn't, and no one with personal knowledge ever said he would. But get your clicks on the "what-ifs", fella. It's how the gun lobby ginned up so many sales during the early days of the Obama administration. It's a cheap playbook, but not one that's hard to follow. Mississippi's full of suckers.

Tate knew that, but wanted to score some political points with his base. He's as intellectually dishonest a governor as we've had.

Anonymous said...

The Tater is correct

Anonymous said...

If you watched the debates, Biden was asked about federal COVID orders. He understood that governors had the autonomy to not follow the government's recommendation.

Tate is just trying to look tough.

Anonymous said...

Keep playing stupid and the feds will be forced to act. Wonder if we can entice them to place the re-education camp in Canton.

"Why not thank Donald for the flu and common cold while you're at it. It's a virus. Try a little common sense." The flu and common cold are viruses such as Covid is. What point are you trying to make? Scared, don't want to die a horrible death. I'd suggest not driving. You have absolutely no control over this so called killer that about 98.5%+ survive. Numbers are going up meaning much more testing is going on and that just maybe the so called wearing a mask is not as effective as we have been preached to.

Anonymous said...

"Constitution? What's that? We got us Biden-Harris! We don't need no Constitution!" Oo fucking Rah.

Anonymous said...

"New infrastructure will be nice." Could that possibly also mean a large wall?

Anonymous said...

Nothing to fight. Just declare MS a sanctuary and refuse to enforce. Make it illegal for any blue Mayors that try. DEMS set the standard and have made sanctuaries acceptable.

Anonymous said...

"Piss on Tate. I cannot wait for Biden to start to assist cities like Jackson directly"

Gawd yes !

I hope ̶p̶o̶t̶ ̶h̶o̶l̶e̶s̶, (I mean craters) . . . are Biden's first priority in that town.

Lord Knows lil' Taliaferro Junior hasn't done much about that . . . or really anything about Jackson's street issues.

Repaving one hundred yards of Northside Drive or Old Canton Road while WLBT & WAPT cameras roll . . doesn't
constitute an aggressive "street improvement project".



Anonymous said...

I don’t give a shit what the Government says or does, I’m wearing my freaking mask and will abide by any rules that may save my family’s life!
Tate is a pussy Governor will put it on the ballot and let the people decide.

Unless President Trump says stand down!

Anonymous said...

@3:26
The point is Trump has no more control over covid than he does over the flu or colds.

Anonymous said...

"if he would have acknowledged the dangers in the beginning, appealed to common sense and ASKED people to wear mask and social distance he could have saved thousands of lives."

If the president would have taken the doomsday approach favored by so many, every one of us would be cleaning our ass with the garden hose or an old shirt indefinitely based on the public's reaction to him "downplaying" it

Anonymous said...

"re-education camp in Canton."

Laughing very hard at that one !

Hey dude, weed might be legal now, but even my pot-head friends look down on the LSD crowd.

For your own future mental health, please get off that shit.

Anonymous said...

It will be interesting to see if future stimulus bills are tied to state compliance with lockdown and mask mandates. If so this could be a G.H. Bush moment of no new taxes and then reality hits. Tate is pontificating with a check he does not want to reject. Politics 101, don't make promises you cannot have full control over.

Anonymous said...

I cannot wait for Biden to start to assist cities like Jackson directly.....cutting the state out entirely.

He'll struggle to top all of the great things Obama did for Jackson.

Anonymous said...

Just call it in the interest of national security and Biden can make an executive order that says anything he wants. Healthcare, legalized weed, $20 minimum wage, the sky is the limit as we have found out. Republicans taught us that.

Anonymous said...

@ Every Single one of you pro-lockdown, anti-rights cowards, left or right: Keep poking the bear, don’t be surprised when it collectively bites.

Anonymous said...

@3:26
The point is that covid, flu, and colds are all viruses that Trump (or Biden) can not control.

Kingfish said...

4:41: True. Feds can't order local employees directly BUT under the same case and S.D. v Dole, they can condition receipt of federal funds.

However, any such aid is first going to have to be appropriated by Congress and I don't think the GOP Senate will agree to that condition placed in the legislation.

Anonymous said...

Bottom line here: Biden's handlers don't have the balls to float such a nonsensical mandate. Will you silly people please relax.

Anonymous said...

Amen 2:32. Just over 2600 of the 3500+ deaths in MS are from the 65+ age group. You old farts need to sequester yourselves or your demise will be a lesser drain on Social Security.

Anonymous said...

Look at the number of cases nationwide today, 160,000, before jumping to any conclusions.

Jacksun said...

172,000 cases today, about the population inside the city limits of Jackson. Jackson’s own ICU’s out of capacity already. In fact Biden said he was not endorsing Dr. O’s suggestion at this point. Biden advocates instead universal mask wearing, something our idiot Governor ended the mandate for at the end of October so as to suppress the vote in November. We’ll soon see where this goes as the ICU’s overtop.

Anonymous said...

Here is a summary comment from the NEJM article.

" One might argue that fear and anxiety are better countered with data and education than with a marginally beneficial mask, particularly in light of the worldwide mask shortage, but it is difficult to get clinicians to hear this message in the heat of the current crisis. Expanded masking protocols’ greatest contribution may be to reduce the transmission of anxiety, over and above whatever role they may play in reducing transmission of Covid-19. The potential value of universal masking in giving health care workers the confidence to absorb and implement the more foundational infection-prevention practices described above may be its greatest contribution."

Soooo, the NEJM likes the idea of universal masking even though it admits masking is marginally beneficial.

If you want to wear a mask, be my guest. I choose not to wear a mask. Of course the discourse today has degenerated into the notion of submit to the narrative or be forced to submit.

Anonymous said...

I lived in Louisiana when they were the last state in the union to allow 18 year olds to purchase and consume liquor, that is until the Feds threatened to withhold federal highway funds. Then they saw the light. Not saying it’s right but it’s a method the Feds have used in the past to force states to abide federal “requests” and I could see crazy Joe withholding money from states to combat the China virus that don’t abide the King’s commands.
On another note, would another shutdown force the state medical association to allow telemedicine visits with out of state providers? Like I’ve said before on the coast you must apply to Internest before they decide whether or not they will accept you as a new patient. It has forced me to use Ochsner practitioners as they will treat you no matter your medical history. And yes I do have health insurance and a compliant patient just have multiple unavoidable health issues.

Anonymous said...

1.25 million die in auto accidents each year. Another 20-50 million are injured, that amounts to 3287 deaths per day. PARK ALL CARS, close all businesses, we must to protect each other. One life lost is one to many.

Anonymous said...

7:22. So...theres around 900 deaths of people under 65? I thought it was just a cold that was only dangerous to the elderly who have underlying conditions. Huh. So medical professionals were right?

12:08. Have you seen the studies done by the Univ of Maryland or the Univ of Colorado on how aerosols spread in the air from speaking, singing, or playing an instrument? Turns out with a mask on that a lot of aerosols are absorbed into the mask, and that the lesser amount of aerosol you breathe out doesnt carry as far? Huh.

Research is ongoing. Turns out that the more society knows, the better it can react to a problem. Ignoring it/denying it/stopping testing does not stop a contagious virus, which can be deadly, make you really sick, or be nothing at all.

Anonymous said...

What, exactly, does 'WILL FIGHT' mean? Does it mean Tater will resist, ignore or chuckle at? Or does it mean fight in court? Or does it mean he'll opt for another kitchen-table presser in which he asks for prayers? Whatever he does or doesn't do, I simply cannot see this man as an adult.

Anonymous said...

I am operating under the rules of common sense, you can do what ever you want just keep your distance.

Disturbing times said...

What is scary is that Biden has little independent thought. His lips move but everything is coming from his handlers and/or teleprompter.

You can take this to the bank: If he takes office, sometime in 2021 the 25th Amendment will be invoked and he will be removed from office. Then the batshit crazy extreme left wing Harris will move into the Oval.

Do you want either of these fools to have possession of the nuclear codes? To receive that infamous "2 AM phone call?"

Use your imagination of what will likely happen next. Can you say 1776?

Anonymous said...

These comments show who will be worth having on a front line and who would be waving a white flag at the snap of a twig. Make peace with God and live your life. You have little control over when and how you’ll die but your pearl clutching can make the future oppressive for those you may leave behind.

Anonymous said...

@ 7:49 - your 1.2 million number is WORLDWIDE! And if you have ever been to Africa or India, then you know where the majority of these deaths occur. In the US there are only around 30000 - 40000 vehicle deaths each year. (And now compare that with the 240000 corona deaths we had so far).

What did we learn from this? If you google facts, read carefully and read at least 3 different results before you make yourself the idiot of the day in the net.

Anonymous said...

"True. Feds can't order local employees directly BUT under the same case and S.D. v Dole, they can condition receipt of federal funds." Form of blackmail which I guess is ok?

Anonymous said...

Just remember, we are all gonna die and can't control when, where, or how. Have a nice Thanksgiving my little chickadees.

Anonymous said...

Nobody has a “right” or the “personal freedom” to put others at risk of serious illness or death. So, yes, masks can be mandated.

Anonymous said...

Just out of curiosity, who enforces a federal mask mandate? The police that the dems want to defund? Are we really going to fine and throw people in jail over not wearing a mask? Jackson can’t even take care of the homicide rate. How will they make people wear masks?

Anonymous said...

Under 40k auto deaths per year in US....not 1.25M

Calm Down said...

at November 13, 2020 at 2:00 PM

The follow up paper you mentioned:

https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMc2020836

is interesting. It states: "In truth, the intent of our article was to push for more masking, not less." So the authors, in their own admission have laid out their agenda. Truth hiding in plain sight.

Further, they add multiple caveats and qualifiers, hidden in the footnotes.
Ref. 4: results indicate that surgical face masks could prevent transmission of human coronaviruses and influenza viruses from symptomatic individuals.

"indicate", "could prevent", "from symptomatic individuals".

This demand to bow before THE SCIENCE and to demean those with questions is a disturbing trend of the left.

If the science were 'settled', we wouldn't have to keep asking for proof. The vitriol on display is a function of that lack of evidence.

You claim to 'do this for a living'. I have no doubt that you have lofty degrees and a high paid position. I'm glad for you and hope that you continue to be insolated from the harmful effects of lockdowns, freezes, and mandates. However, you're not the boss of me. We can both be glad of that.

Anonymous said...

Whether Biden mandates we all wipe our asses with single ply toilet paper or that we must wear masks, nobody on this planet will enforce either.

Anonymous said...

" Whether Biden mandates we all wipe our asses with single ply toilet paper"

I don't care what that propped-up corpse mandates.

I'm sticking with Charmin extra soft.
( Even if I have to buy it on the toilet paper black market).


Anonymous said...

You can't mandate common sense.

Anonymous said...

Most of you Trump haters hate him because of a lie your precious media told you. He has done more to help this country than any President since Reagan. Stop following your emotions for a bit and follow some logic. Just because it’s on NBC doesn’t make it the truth. Venture out and try some other, non- main-stream news sources. You might become less hateful.

Jacksun said...

6:23: Just wear your freaking mask.

Anonymous said...

" 6:23: Just wear your freaking mask."

Yep.

And be sure to wear a new mask after six months.

LOL.

Plus, wearing it around one's collar bone defeats the entire theory of preventing or catching any little respitory virus particle.

Anonymous said...

Tate will back down the moment the feds threaten to withhold money or threaten to put him in jail for violating federal laws reguarding shutdown/emergency orders.

Anonymous said...

The US Constitution doesn't mention the right of the government to withhold federal funds from a state. In fact, the US Constitution doesn't mention federal funding to a state, either. And if you actually believe 'the feds' will threaten to jail a state's governor, you're as full of shit as that turkey you're about to buy next week.

No president, since Lincoln, has jailed any elected official.

Anonymous said...

Tate doesn't have the balls to declare Biden President Elect.

Anonymous said...

As a Business owner, I support this. Don't lock us down... If you let us work, we can pay our bills. Don't handout anymore weekly checks or my employees wont come back to work.. If they do leave, I cannot fill the spots. The positions I have are not meant to support a family at $15+ per hour. They are to get you through HS and into College and the working world.. I know this.. My food is affordable so my labor needs to be.
Stay home if you are at risk. Wear your mask and sanitize otherwise... why does this have anything to do with mandates.. its called using your brain people. Survival of the fittest..(steps off of soapbox)

Kingfish said...

Well, Emmanuel and Osterholm are two guys on a task force. They've been used to shooting their mouths off about this subject, now they have to learn to keep them shut until an actual policy is formed. Tate may have been a little premature but the Biden team has backed away from shutdown talk as well.



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In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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