Tuesday, April 2, 2019

This will Not End Well

Reality Show in Jackson? Uh-oh.  This has to be an April Fool's thing.  Has to be.




28 comments:

Anonymous said...

No doubt, this would be better produced in the land of milk and honey (Madison County). Perfect cast of snobby people available throughout (especially in the City of Mayor Mary).

Anonymous said...

Doubt it’ll be contained to 39211. Men, if there any still out there, keep that pimp hand strong. Say no to that ho and save your dignity.

Anonymous said...

Reunion was made for reality tv. Think of the opportunities. I know a group of young lawyers, some with very important parents and some with high profile jobs, who switch partners all the time in Reunion. TV gold.

Anonymous said...

I have no doubt this is real, it is very profitable to do this type of TV.

This will be absolutely perfect for the metro. All of the "elites" will be exposed as the same ignorant trash but with a more profitable hustle. It will probably be a hit. Because it takes place in Mississippi they should segregate it into two shows based on the racial aspect.

People around the world will laugh so hard at these hayseeds in their gauche McMansions pretending to be high class.

Anonymous said...

@6:46

Concrete pineapples too!

Anonymous said...

There are trust fund babies who live in Reunion and have never worked a day in their life. its the gym, lunch at the club, then golf. Everyday. got to be some rich content in there.

Anonymous said...

Good grief! You "have not's" are a nasty bunch....concrete pineapples? trust fund babies? really?

Anonymous said...

Personally, I'd go the Rankin county route:

1) Cast everyone in the Mistletoe "He f---s me everryydayyyyyy video"
2) Hit show

Anonymous said...

The wannabe elitists will flock to show off their over-mortgaged over-built homes, vehicles (who has the most stickers on the back windows of the SUVs), children's private schools, college football season events, and sorority/fraternity stories, and be careful not to be seen shopping at Wal-Mart and dining at Chick-fil-a. This will be epic.

Anonymous said...

Apparently this disaster will ensue at Oak Alley Plantation in Vacherie, LA.

Change the Flag and Fill the Potholes said...

PSA - Gmail address??? This is a total scam. Wealthy people give them a bunch of personal information then it is sold on the dark web. Better yet, they give them access to their homes - and their friends' homes...

Gargoyle Patrol said...

The idiot who repetitively posts about concrete pineapples needs to know they are well-seasoned copper, not concrete. But, we all know the poster is the one with the concrete Colonel Rebs on either side of his green-egg. And he lives in Gluckstadt. And he grills meat from the green-meat end of the Kroger cooler.

Anonymous said...

Where are the Fraziers when you need them?

And 8:11am, the hate is for the trust fund baby types mentioned above, not those that worked hard for what they have and can do or came from money and continue to work hard and grow their blessings on their own. I know several of each type, but the schedule that the above poster described above is real for some and doesn't solicit respect or admiration, as well it shouldn't.

Anonymous said...

@April 3, 2019 at 7:42 AM

Yeah, and there aren't any trust fund babies at CCJ, River Hills, in Eastover (proper) or in Woodland Hills. The pineapple jokes are as old as 'Whole Foods will save us." You probably wish you could be donking someone else's wife. Those who make these jokes sound like jealous harpies. And I don't live in Reunion.

Anonymous said...

Obviously a scam, but still: there's some potential here.

Are you telling me you wouldn't watch an Arrested Development-style show featuring a bunch of faux rich NE Jackson/Madison social climbers? And maybe one normal, Jason Bateman type person as a stand-in for the audience?

Anonymous said...

Will there be an episode when the private school moms take their honor students to get diagnosed with learning disorders before taking the ACT

Myopic much? said...

Easy on those “trust fund babies”- they just might be your God-emperor one day!

Anonymous said...

There will be a run on "Salt Life," "Ole Miss," and "Yeti cooler" stickers. Get them while they last.

Anonymous said...

@ 1:34 NOW THAT'S RICH!

Anonymous said...

Concrete pineapples are on the same level as barnwood decor. The only thing worse than actual barnwood is particle board with a fake barnwood veneer.

Anonymous said...

Oh man, the tired ol' Reunion spill-makes me think of Bernie Sanders and his flock. A reality show potentially about Jackson and all of a sudden "poof" it's about Reunion. Gee, wonder where that stems from?? I'm sure there are broke people all over Reunion just like the rest of the state and nation living paycheck to paycheck. However, I can tell that my very unpresumptuous neighbors choose to live there for the family friendly atmosphere that's there just as we do. That's reality. I don't hold a "high profile" job nor do most of my neighbors. And nope, I'm not broke. I paid cash for my house in my 40's by get this: living below my means, spending less than I earn and saving money! Like it or not, there's a lot of other people over there the same way. Get a job, save some money, and perhaps you could live there one day too and possibly get over that reason that makes people like you jump to "Reunion" when talking about a reality show in Jackson.

Anonymous said...

@3:40 PM
spiel (spēl)
Yiddish
n.
A lengthy or extravagant speech or argument usually intended to persuade.
v.
To talk or say (something) at length or extravagantly.

Anonymous said...

@ 5:40 Wow, what a vocabulary you have. Impressive! I would go and on and on with this yiddish, but I've got to clean my pineapple.

Anonymous said...

Proposed name for reality show in Reunion - "Just a' Swanging"

Anonymous said...

I think they should also offer the same format but substitute members of the Mississippi Legislaturem while in session.

You would have it all, off the rail drunks, lots of unscrupulous behavior, corruption and enough oat sowing to qualify for a farm loan. Might even pay extra on the hulu for it.

Anonymous said...

Episode One: “ As The Pineapple Turns”
Episode Two: “River Hills 39211”
Episode Three: “The Bold and the Beautiful of Eastover”

Messick said...

Here’s a bit of healthy advice for all who are in the Anti-Pineapple caucus; stay away from Columbia, South Carolina. Their ubiquitous pineapples have been around since before the War.

Anonymous said...

@ 2:35 PM

And 30-A stickers



Recent Comments

Search Jackson Jambalaya

Subscribe to JJ's Youtube channel

Archives

Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
.