Wednesday, August 24, 2022

Robert St. John: The Best Job, Ever

 If I carried a business card, there would be a lot of job titles listed on it— restaurateur, author, producer, columnist, writer, cook, designer, documentarian, show host, travel host, board member, manager, president, CEO, founder, and chairman of the board. But the most important job title I have— or ever will have, and it’s not even close— is “Dad.” Actually, “Dad,” if my son is addressing me, “Daddy,” if it’s my daughter. 

 Most of those job titles are positions and responsibilities I sought— some I dreamed of as a young man, and others I never expected. I'm embarrassed to say “dad” was never something I thought about. 

 

Though I always wanted to be a father, even as a teenager, I’m not sure why. It probably had something to do with losing my father at an early age. I could probably go sit on a doctor’s couch for an hour a week for a couple of years and figure that out. But to what end? The point is I wanted to be a father but— had you asked me in the mid 1980s when I was in full-restaurant mode— being a father would have been way down on the list behind restaurateur, chef, and/or business owner.

 

When I met my wife in the summer of 1988 neither of us wanted to get married. She claimed early, and often, that she never wanted to have children. It’s so strange to type that sentence today as she is 100% totally devoted to our kids and is the absolute best mother I know. I, on the other hand, wanted a whole litter of kids. I would have had a dozen if it were up to me. But I was super focused on my career and building up the restaurant. 





Then my daughter was born, and everything changed in that moment.

 

I can honestly say that my entire life's focus, mission, and purpose was transformed in the maternity ward of the Forrest General Hospital at 8:10 a.m. on May 31st, 1997. 

 

I knew I would be excited about having a child. I knew I would love and adore a child. But when they put that crying a little girl in my arms it's as if a box, heretofore hidden inside me for 36 years, opened instantly, and my capacity to love another being amplified exponentially. The degree with which I thought I would love my child paled in comparison to the feeling I had in that moment. It’s the same deep feeling I have today, if not more so. 

 

My son was born four years later to the same sentiment. We stopped at one each. My friend Tracy says, “With two you can play man-to-man. With three you gotta play zone. And zone is never as good as man to man.” 

 

I have loved and enjoyed every phase of their childhoods. Even the early crying-at-night stages. My wife did almost all the late-night rocking, but when it was my turn, I can remember telling myself, “There will be a day when you will miss this and wish you were holding this little infant in your arms. Treasure it.” Those days came, and they came too fast.

 

Through elementary, junior high, high school, football, soccer, theatre performances, cheerleading, and long trips when no one would be quiet in the back seat, I would do it all over again, tenfold. There's almost nothing I would skip.

 

Though of all those phases— even the 10-year-old phase when I was seen as the greatest thing alive in my son’s eyes— I'm not sure I would trade any of it for where we are today. My 25-year-old daughter, just moved back from New Orleans where she was working as an interior designer. She has a house in town and is working with another interior designer. She loves her job. My 21-year-old son has just finished a six-month stint in Florence, Italy cooking in the kitchen of a friend. In another week he will head to culinary school in New York to become a chef.

 

I never pushed my career on them. The restaurant industry is brutal enough, and if one isn’t totally in love and obsessed with it, he or she will be miserable. My son came to me six years ago and stated his intention to go into the restaurant business. I laid out an eight-year plan for him to follow. He is currently almost halfway through that plan. My daughter never expressed interest in the restaurant business. They both worked for me in their high school years, but we always knew she would be an interior designer. And she is a very good at what she does.

 

Maybe that's what makes yesterday so special. I spent two hours in the kitchen of our Italian restaurant with our lead prep cook and kitchen manager at Tabella in Hattiesburg, Joseph Heidelberg, the new executive chef at Enzo in Richland, Justin Ferguson, my business partner, Jarred Patterson, and my son. We were developing recipes for the new Italian restaurant we will open in a matter of weeks. The menu will include American-Italian food such as the food we have been serving at Tabella for the last 11 years, but it will also offer authentic Italian food that I have learned from my yearly trips to Italy, and my son is leading the effort on those dishes as he learned many of them during his most recent stint.

 

After a full day in the kitchen, I picked my daughter up at her house and we drove to Ridgeland, Mississippi to the new restaurant so she could start moving forward on the design plan. It was just the two of us, which is kind of rare, as she spends most of her family time with her mother or as part of the whole (the four of us). I loved it. The conversation never lulled. We spoke about my vision for the restaurants, and other restaurants that are in the works. She sat in the passenger seat and thumbed through the plans as we discussed colors, coverings, and artwork. 

 

At the restaurant, we walked around and measured and did all the things that an interior designer needs to do to get her job done. Then we had dinner. I have traveled to a lot of places this year. I even spent three months eating my way through Spain and Italy. But no dinner can compare to this one where she and I just sat and talked shop while we ate.

 

On the ride home, we stopped talking about business and focused on music. I played DJ for a while, and then she took over the car’s sound system. We talked about the music we were listening to these days and shared new songs the other hadn’t heard yet. It was a perfect end to a perfect day. 

 

Thirty-five years ago, when I got in this business, I was at a point in my life where I had no intentions or prospects of marriage. I just wanted to own a restaurant. Just one. That was my dream. Kids were nowhere in my top-20 life goals. Today, my family is at the top of the pyramid. I guess we must be open to new experiences, and always be available for what God has in store. Today I am a happy man. I am in the business I love so much and working with the two human beings on this planet I love the most. My wife understands that last statement, by the way. 

 

Onward



Polenta

2 cups         Polenta 
6 cups         Chicken stock 
1 TB           Kosher salt
1 tsp           Fresh ground black pepper

In a 2 quart sauce pot, bring the chicken stock to a boil. Add the polenta or cornmeal and reduce to medium-low heat and stir constantly until it begins to thicken, about 3-4 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, and drizzle with a small amount of extra virgin olive oil. Serve immediately.
 
   

 

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

My man is eating at Biaggi's in that photo.

Anonymous said...

@10:21 AM - Yes, that is where his new Italian restaurant is going.

Anonymous said...

The best parents teach their children and other people how to take care of themselves. If your child grows up and isn’t qualified to make decisions for themselves, can you imagine the outcome of their procreation? Look around and you see the consequences of being unqualified. Your children will respect you more if take the time to teach them at young age. Kudos to this St. John guy if his children can evolve without him.

Anonymous said...

Agree 1:02.
Mad respect to parents who can raise functional independent kids these days.

It is almost a unicorn level rarity, and I have so many employees who spend an absurd amount of time coaching their grown (in age at least) children through the most inconsequential life choices.

They are of age and having children too now, and I can only imagine how clueless the spawn of these helpless adults will be.

Anonymous said...

We all know RSJ's history. He tells us his story every week.
I am glad the man sobered-up and became very successful.

But I think most readers would like to know how his new endeavor
in "The Fondren" is progressing ?

No doubt his new operation is in a pickle without water.

(We've heard Jeff G. try to raise Hell ... in a too nice way).

But I would rather hear Robert's thoughts about lack of Jackson water and dealing with City of Jackson civil servants ... instead of goofy essays about eating at "Mom and Pop" pizza joints in Italy.








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Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


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Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

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