Someone has officially put himself forth as a candidate for Chancellor at Ole Miss.
Tuesday, August 27, 2019
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
47 comments:
Shameless.
This guy is nowhere near liberal enough. The students would protest this for years. This can't happen. Not in Oxford. School is totally liberal now honestly. Students wouldn't allow it and players would refuse to play.
Good God, like an old athlete who just can't figure out what is next. Begging for this job is unbecoming.
When the hell is the lottery going to be running? Finish the damn job you were given! It's not like we are having to invent the PowerBall or the Mega Millions.
It feels good to start rumors that you are wanted and needed. I hear millions are begging him to run for senate also.
The first sign that he has no idea what he is getting into is that he includes his CCP certification at the very top of his resume. I mean, you have to have some letters after your name to be considered for this job right?
He'll be right up there with a few PhD's and JD's with his CCP.
I vote no! This clown would be a disaster.
He did this months ago. Total arrogance. Other than having a degree in either economics or accounting, he has zero experience or qualification in education. He actually believes that because he started an entrepreneurial enterprise and became wealthy, he is equipped to lead a major state university.
In his photo ops, you will see him outside on the lawn in most venues. That's because his head is too large to fit through standard doorways.
What the FARK is an 'independent thought leader'?
He'll have a better chance running against Cindy.
Who knows......maybe Girard and Stormin Norman Katool can turn that place around ! ! !
Would you rather one of two former Republican Congressman from District 3 get the job?
Campaigning for chancellor?
Mr. Fish,
Fortunately those are not our only 3 choices.
Too many one hit wonders just assume they will excel in a totally unrelated CEO job. It just does not work that way. Surely to God the college board gets that.
Saying that this thing comes down to Harper or Gibbert reminds me of all of the speculation about which golden child legislator would get the state auditor nod.
And nobody had a damn clue then either did they?
Red Herring, Kingfish. It's not a matter of him vs two other goobers. The point here is that he's another Digbert but he's totally unqualified.
The Street Committee says Boyce has the inside track.
Harper is too busy preening to take the job.
I nominate Bennie Thompson!
Anyone who thinks Ole Miss is "liberal" has absolutely no idea what that word means. Please let me remind the gentle readers of JJ that "liberal" in Mississippi means "slightly conservative" anywhere else, except maybe Alabama. The wealthy sons and daughters of doctors and lawyers and business owners in the State of Mississippi are not "liberal" in any sense of the word.
Boyce makes so much more sense. That would be good ole fashioned Mississippi kin folk back stroking. He is one of "them".
Not being a part and supporting how higher education works is very good. The University system across this nation is killing this country.
In national terms for universities, Ole Miss is not liberal; it is center-right, if anything, on average. Ole Miss is not even the most liberal college in the state.
Wait until Ole Miss plays Cal-Berkeley in week 3 or 4. Now that is a "liberal" university.
Ronnie Musgrove has stated both publicly and privately that this is his dream job and that he will pursue it vigorously.
I see Adam Gaucheaneau has picked up the GG website this afternoon. Just a coincidence on timing, I am sure. NOT.
Yeah, right. If Ole Miss wasn't so liberal we wouldn't have a land shark, or a bear or whatever the hell the mascot is this week. The first thing liberals do is character assassinate traditions in an attempt to create the "history of now."
In Mississippi anybody with a doctorate in something other than theology is presumed to be a liberal. Ole Miss has a whole community of PHD's who want to be accepted on the national level as equals despite working at the most neanderthal joke in the country. It's quite a challenge. So sometimes they rearrange the confederate memorials hoping the outside world will be impressed. Not.
This clown just wants ANY position to make him look and feel important. Boyce would make an excellent Chancellor.
Ole Miss is not the same as when I went there............unfortunately. They have done away with the fact that everyone of the "University Grays" died for what they believed in. The last several chancellors have made it a big point of throwing out any sign of Ole Miss history. No more rebel yells. No more Col. Reb. No more playing Dixie at ballgames. No more flag waving. "Sharks" is just another shameful name for our teams. All they want is National prestige and to make all the liberal students happy. I am very disappointed.
If you've ever worked with or around Boyce, you know he's a nice guy, but, he's dull at ditch-water and twice as slow moving. Nothing at all ever above mediocre with Boyce.
Three months ago, the secret-pages had Pickering positioned as Chancellor. Then Harper. Then Mabus. Actually, the place seems to be clicking on more cylinders than normal with nobody in charge.
But this guy is as crazy as a dog after a gasoline enema if his ego leads him to think he has a shot at this job.
Gilbert does bring up some good points, however. Focusing on what you're good at is a start. Engineering at Old Miss while MSU has a broad, nationally recognized program? That needs to change and Gibert's correct; there's just not sufficient population for duplicate professional programs in many fields within Mississippi. More emphasis to UMMC, Law, Pharmacy, and business majors play to Old Miss' strengths, although MSU & USM (amongst others) have made significant inroads in business. Frankly, Old Miss needs to look at nursing as well. There are a lot of ADN , BSN, and MSN programs in the state, and Old Miss' NCLEX (RN) 3-year average passing rate ranking is 14 out of 24 programs; lower half of in-state competition. That's not where the state's (alleged) flagship university should score. Kudos for acknowledging Keenum at MSU, as I don't think Mississippi gives him the credit he deserves.
Doesn't matter , though , while intellectually stimulating there's no way academic establishment would (or should) accept Gibert as Chancellor at UM. But, gotta take some of these ideas seriously for the Black Bears , Landsharks , Rebels , whatever to remain relevant in the state.
Dr Boyce has more sense than to take that job.
Girard would be a good fit. He is smart, personable and gets along with all.
I just hope he knows not to hire nefarious tutors that will take advantage of our athletes by doing their schoolwork for them without their knowledge.
7:17, those traits make him better qualified to be a greeter at Wal-Mart, not the head of a university. Or a U.S. Senator, which he also wants to be.
Gibert! What a tool. Only person that brags about himself as much is Francis Lee. Gibert and Bomgar tie for who thinks they are the smartest. And who would ever think his wife, who works part time at a women’s clothing store, knows anything about college football. Gerard used her to plant false info on Coach Sherrill then she had a “special” relationship with the NCAA investigator. The Gibert’s stroked a huge check to Coach Sherrill for their made up lies.
Put Francis Lee, Billingsley, Latino, Gibert and Bomgar all in the same boat and you'll have the largest gathering of self-anointed narcissist braggarts known to the free world. But, ain't no way one boat could float that load of blow-fish.
If you're really into pain, attend a coffee with this group and watch your head explode.
11:04pm I could not agree more. And it is apparent that their incessant bloviating comes from profound insecurity.
As for Boyce didn't he say he was retiring from public service as the college board head because he was worn out? A tired old man is not exactly what the university needs at this moment.
6:23 The problem is no modern university wants to be associated with what the "University Grays" believed in (or died for.) The university will continue to make efforts to join the mainstream of higher education despite it's "legacy" The faculty being aware of what the larger world of academia thinks of the Ole Miss "legacy" will continue to pressure for a progressive. It will be a balancing act...
No one gives a hoot about a bunch of hicks dying 150 years ago in a war to preserve slavery. Social media furor among boomers is not indicative of any sizable movement to bring back symbols of treason and slavery.
There is not a chance in hell a person with only an undergraduate degree will become a Chancellor of Ole Miss. Book it.
Y
A
W
N
NEXT!
Before I get into Ole Miss the best thing that could be done for Mississippi Institutions of Higher Learning is the abolishment of the Board of IHL. Each instruction should have complete autonomy & responsibly for its particular institution. Example; recent tenure debacle.
Now for Ole Miss:
Ole Miss is its own worst enemy. Ole Miss needs to clean out the Lyceum & many of the tenured professors. So many who owe their lively hood to Ole Miss, do not have Ole Miss’s best interest at heart. If Ole Miss wants to be steeped in its proud history, why should an outsider be concerned. There are many, many more institutions one may attend. Why do liberals have to tear down everything, especially things of which they have no concern. Liberals are out to destroy the freedoms of America. Whether one hates or loves Ole Miss, ever American should love having the freedom of choice.
We will not be getting Powerball in Mississippi until the end of next year because of this baffoon. Neighboring states had this up and running in 6 months. He would fit in Oxford.
10:08 & 11:04 You're my heros!!!
7:09 AM, those "hicks" were folks just like you and I, conscripted to fight and subject to penalty of death if they did not comply. Also, I love how your loyalty has a statute of limitations. "150 years ago? come on, man! you're killin' my battery, bro!!!"
With apologies to the guy who shaved his back before heading out on a first date...Gerard HAS a new look. He got rid of that silly mustache that made him look like Howard Sprague.
This guy qualifies for a chancellor position about as much as this topic deserves its own thread on the local blog.
Investment Alert: Buy him for what he is worth, and sell him at his self-value. College Board will protect Ole Miss!!
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