Monday, February 14, 2022

The Black Flight Continues

Although ignored by the media, black flight from Jackson continues unabated as blacks who can afford to get out of Jackson are indeed doing so.  JJ first discussed this local phenomenon waaaaaaaay back in 2013 when it reviewed the racial composition of Jackson area schools.  The trend was clear in 2013 and even more clear in 2022 as black student populations doubled and even tripled in all adjacent high schools. It's not too hard to figure out where those students came from as JPS cratered to less than 20,000 students this year. What does it mean? It means blacks are getting the hell out of Jackson and not looking behind. 


High schools were reviewed instead of school districts as they provide better information by the school's proximity to Jackson. For example, Ridgeland High School increased from 34% to 50% while Madison-Central High School remained in the mid-20% range. However, using data from Madison County School District data instead of Ridgeland High School would have skewed the results. The data is available on the Department of Education's website. 

The mass migration of black families from Jackson further dooms Jackson's future.  The outflow deprives Jackson of families it needs not just to survive but thrive.  

Check out the charts posted below to get a true idea of Jackson's black flight. 

 


 

Clinton High School


 

The black student population at Clinton High School  more than tripled from 203 students in 2004 to 673 students in 2022.  The sharpest growth took place between 2004 and 2011 as it increased from 203 students to 531 students. 

2022: 58% / 673 students
2011: 49% / 502 students
2004: 32% / 302 students

Pearl High School 


 

2022: 41%/ 493 students
2011: 31%/ 353 students
2004: 24%/ 230 students


Ridgeland High School

Ridgeland schools have probably been the most affected by JPS's collapse.  The black student population nearly doubled in 18 years.  There are only 89 white students at the school - 9.96%.  However, Hispanic students are surging into the school as the 117 students comprise 13% of the population. 

2022: 71% / 636 students
2011: 50% / 444 students
2004: 34% / 332 students (2005)

Terry High School (Includes Byram area)


 
Terry High School's black student population more than tripled from 2004 to 2022 as only 55 white students now attend the school.  Simply put, Black flight flooded into Byram and Terry schools. 

2012: 94% / 1,119 students
2011: 67% /  897 students
2004: 37% / 360 students

Northwest Rankin High School

Even Northwest Rankin's black student population more than doubled since 2004 as blacks flee Jackson. 
 

2022: 31% / 558 students

2011: 26% / 391 students

2004: 17% / 211 students

 JPS Student Population


 Jackson once had the largest public school district in Mississippi. However, blacks began fleeing the city and its public schools in the early 2010's.  A trickle became a deluge as black students moved away en masse.

JPS TOTAL POPULATION

2022: 19,348

2021: 20,401

2020: 22,510

2019: 23,935

2018: 23,595

2017: 26,948

2016: 28,019

2015: 29,062

2014: 29,898

2013: 29,738

2012: 29,898

2011: 30,366

2010: 30,617

2009: 30,587

2008: 31,191

2007: 31,941

2006: 32,403

2005: 31,611

2004: 31,640


70 comments:

Anonymous said...

People want to live in good school districts. Parents want what is best for their children. They want them being educated somewhere safe and in a community that supports its schools. Ridgeland, Clinton, Madison, Northwest Rankin all fit those criteria.

You cannot blame parents for getting out of Jackson for the sake of their children.

Anonymous said...

I don't blame them one bit and commend them for doing so. And that really makes one wonder what Baby's Chok's end game truly is.

Anonymous said...

Excellent piece, Fish

Anonymous said...

Clearly a bunch of black racist flighters.

Anonymous said...

As someone with kids in public schools at Northwest Rankin, this is not a good thing for the suburbs. JPS transfer students are extremely disrespectful and disruptive to the learning process.

Anonymous said...

Think of this. Black couple both get a job at Nissan. For the first time in their life they have a stable job with some benefits (maybe a 401K, health insurance, leave time). They can afford a 3/2 house in Gluckstadt. Kids can go to better schools. On Saturday, they can wash their car in the morning, watch a little ball on TV in the afternoon, go to bed and not hear gunshots. Dang this suburban life ain't bad compared to Jackson.

Anonymous said...

1:22 I can only partially agree with you. The kids who come from JPS as elementary students have an opportunity to learn the ropes and conform to the higher level of discipline and standards in the suburban schools. The middle and high school students on the other hand are often engrained with the hard core thug behavior common to JPS and are tougher cases. In the Clinton District with which I am familiar it's a damn tough transition from JPS to Clinton Junior or high school. Therein lies the problem.

Anonymous said...

Single mothers dumping they brat babies on good school districts to raise in the absence of two-parent households.

Anonymous said...

what about madison central and germantown?

Anonymous said...

The people who live in the burbs that think the ultimate success or failure of all aspects of the capital city don’t effect them are very stupid. Did you do Germantown?

Anonymous said...

Attended a public meeting for a proposed low-income housing tax credit (LIHTC) project that was attempting to locate in the middle of several subdivisions. People from the surrounding neighborhoods at the meeting were a good cross-section of the town.

The project was doomed when an African-American woman spoke up and said "I worked hard to buy my house and move my family away from those people. I don't want them out here next to me."

Anonymous said...

All correlation but looking at JPS high school populations over a similar time frame would provide some insights into what areas within Jackson are experiencing the greatest flight out of the city and away from JPS.

Anonymous said...

How do you suggest the 'burbs go about saving you 1:56?

Be specific.

Hookah said...

CONREX

Anonymous said...

@2:11
You mean HUD
CONREX charges market rent ($2000 a month) but Section 8 “rent” is $80 a month

Anonymous said...

I have friends living in gated areas of Jackson. This is preposterous that financially successful people living in Jackson have to lock themselves in gated cages to keep criminals out. I for the life of me do not know why they do this. I am also a little tired of providing amenities like showers and fresh water for them.

Anonymous said...

I don't blame them one bit. They are not willing to sacrifice their children's education to a failing school system.

Those leaving Jackson for Byram or Terry are only getting marginal improvement.

Hookah said...

Conrex takes Section 8

Anonymous said...

Great analysis. Thank you, KF.
It's a shame not many (any?) other Jackson reporters take the time to do any research.

Anonymous said...

Everyone is missing the "big picture" Students enrolled is
steady dropping but JPS budget is steady increasing
( along with school portion of property tax)

Anonymous said...

Young parents, you have only one opportunity to educate your children and then they're gone. My two children are adults now, and both are professionals. The education they received in their suburban school district was phenomenal and has opened many doors for them. Do it. Do it now.

Anonymous said...

Whether you are black, white, green, orange, or purple (no, I don't know any green, orange or purple people), anyone who can afford to move themselves and their children from a crime-ridden place into a safer community with better schools will do so. This proves it. It also proves that many people who once lived in Jackson cannot tolerate what Jackson has become, so in lieu of staying in the sinking ship that Jackson is these people decided to pursue a better life.

Anonymous said...

The main thing is that the school districts MUST maintain their standards no matter what. With the influx of students from JPS there will be pressure to make accommodations for their lack of preparation and scholarship. If held to high standards they will perform like anyone else. JPS was not always a bad district. Schools like Jim Hill and Lanier were once academically sound and discipline was maintained. But steadily after the 90's these schools and the others started to accommodate the low achievers and the thugs to the point where those elements now rule the halls and even the teachers are fearful. I can only say to Clinton, Madison, Ridgeland, Pearl and the rest... Hold the Line!!!

Anonymous said...

Maybe Jacksonians are just having less kids these days ;)

fed up in Jackson said...

This would mean that quality of education does matter?

Anonymous said...

But democrats will blame only the WHITE families for the decline of Jackson. Jackson has no middle class of any color. I hate it but with the jokes that keep getting elected and re-elected, I do not see any hope. Jackson is our capital city, but I don't feel safe there. Most don't.

Anonymous said...

Lot of truth here for sure. This explains so much of the metrics of the metro private schools. What a shame. KF—it would be interesting to see the charts for MC and Germantown.

Anonymous said...

Germantown High opened about ten years ago and I suspect its Black enrollment has increased dramatically. Some of that must be Black flight from Canton.

Anonymous said...

Did you know that JPS has more or less eliminated girls sports with one exception. Basketball. They stole those funds to fatten admins pockets. And folks wonder why there is flight.

Kingfish said...

MC remained at 26% since 04. Brandon barely budged as well. Germantown at 40% when it was around 35% a few years ago.

Anonymous said...

This is great news for the private schools! It won't be long before you see Phase II of white flight: leaving what were once great public schools in Madison and Rankin counties to the private schools.

Anonymous said...

Had a black couple rent my rental house in the burbs. Sold it after they moved out as they were the best renters you could have. They often told people they were tired of Jackson and Jackson problems and left it at that. They now live in a gated subdivision in Rankin County, and I couldn't be happier for them.

Anonymous said...

The problem is that all of these parents wanting a better life for their kids still vote democrat, listen to Al Sharpton and will not denounce the poison parts of the black culture.

Plus, the problems they are running from were created by them and their parents.

You're welcome to go anywhere you desire. Just leave your rap, carjackings, robberies, violence and arrogance behind. We don't want it.

Anonymous said...

Failing schools? Please tell exactly when it was that schools began to fail. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are a lot of issues that need to be addressed in the JPS, but look at what they have to work with. I always thought it was the student who failed. So let's see. Let's say half of any given class fails. Does that mean the school failed? Perhaps the 50% who failed were from homes where the parent (notice that is not plural) could give a crap less about education. So does still mean that the school failed?

Anonymous said...

No Child Left Behind was really the beginning of the end for Public Education. I don't think I'll send my kids to a public school. That's not to say that private schools don't have their share of fuck ups.

Anonymous said...

Kingfish: Take me seriously as a journalist, I am a real honest journalist!
Also Kingfish: The Truth is racist and might get me disinvited from some cocktail parties. Therefore it must be expunged and censored!

Anonymous said...

In the last year, we gained a new neighbor in Madison, a black family from Jackson. They were paying private school tuition to send three kids to Hillcrest, and decided to move to Madison and send kids to public school when they tested the hot real estate market and sold their home in South Jackson.

They are incredible neighbors. Best yard in the neighborhood. I gave them the name of a painter and he placed a Newk's gift card for $50 in my mailbox as a thank you.



Anonymous said...

"No Child Left Behind was really the beginning of the end for Public Education. I don't think I'll send my kids to a public school. That's not to say that private schools don't have their share of fuck ups."

Yes it was. No idea why most conservatives hold such a positive view of the W administration. It was a complete disaster from the lies about WMDs leading to the deaths of all of those Iraqis to ruining public school education and to ramping up the ever increasing federal government infringing on citizens' rights by spying on them nonstop. A complete and utter failure.

anonamouse said...

3:57 PM wins top post in this blog.Saw a recent post on nextdoor from some woman espousing economic,social, yada, yada equality. What a load of communist BS.

Anonymous said...

I'm a conservative and I agree with you 5:07.

See how easy that is?

I hope you are also open minded to the idea that liberals can admit the flaws and utter failures of the Obama and Biden administrations.

If we could all stop being blind cheerleaders, that'd be cool.

Anonymous said...

Y’all realize that black people move to these school districts from outside Jackson as well, right? I’m not denying that black flight is real, but other than the mere fact that black flight exists, I’m not sure what these statistics are supposed to show, other than that these schools might be gaining some black students while possibly losing some white students.

By the way, local(ish) legal story, why haven’t you reported on the Gregory and Brandon case matter out of Brookhaven yet? One would think that would be right up your alley.

Kingfish said...

It's in Brookhaven and the media is all over it. If they are guilty, throw the book at them.

However, this being Carlos the Clown, be prepared for a something else. Just going by his track record.

Anonymous said...

There is an industry in the metro area that has matured over the last 50 years. Jackson has every opportunity to compete with this industry that consumes what ? 60 million ? 80 million annually . This industry drains the bank accounts of those that have the most to spend on everything from home renovations to better cars , more groceries and more goods and services purchased in the city limits than can be counted . Just pulling 500 families to Jackson away from this industry could be a game changer . The industry is private schools and race has nothing to do with it . The curriculum is in the public schools in Jackson but not the competitive facilities. Give those financially burdened with private school tuition costs a real reason to stop paying and they will come . K-12 with 2k students in a state of the art facility with drug prevention measures , safety measures and competitive extra curricular opportunities and all of a sudden Jackson will see industry showing up bringing employees with huge salaries , flight back into the city and monies for municipal services . It can be done.

Anonymous said...

You literally just posted a story about Sarah Palin’s lawsuit against the NYT. How is that more local or uncovered by the media than this Brookhaven case.

Give me a break, because you know better.

Anonymous said...

The black families (particularly those with kids in school) that can leave midtown and south Jackson are doing so because they are reasonable folks - no different than white, tan, red, yellow-- oh well, that track was taken earlier - families.

They care about getting a reasonable education for their kids and can't do it under the current laws that say one must go to the school dictated by their zip code. With the exception of the magnet, APAC and charter schools in Jackson, that covers all zip codes within the city. So those that can move.

It is probably true that those moving while kids are in elementary school are not hurting the quality of the surrounding schools that they are entering - because they have not spent their time at school being somewhat babysat and otherwise pissing their days away.

The Clinton public schools went majority black a few years ago, but has maintained itself as an "A" rated school throughout. And the Clinton School district taxes are significantly less than that of JPS. Kinds puts the whole claim of 'lack of appropriate tax dollars, and the family circumstances as being the root cause of the failure of JPS.

As mentioned above the other story here is that JPS budget (tax rates) have continued to be increased while the student population has dropped by a full third (32,000 to 19,000) -- approaching half. If that's not an opener for a full investigation of the budgets and tax rates, don't know what is.

Anonymous said...

@7:09
That's different. Those are copy/paste articles that KF pays for. They don't require him to travel to that shithole, Brookhaven or to interact with people who intimidate him.

Kingfish said...

One problem is kids who move to other schools from JPS are all too often at reading or math levels way behind their peers. You are right. If they start in elementary school then they are on a good track. But if they come in during middle and high school, different story. Several people who work in the neighboring school districts told me one problem is many of the kids whose parents are renters are transient in nature. Thus they float from school to school, some good, some bad, as the kids matriculate.

In MCSD, they can usually tell who the former JPS kids are. When junior gets in trouble, a parent comes down to the district to complain and get the decision reversed. Well, they have a different policy. The school board, not admin, is in charge of such decisions and they have rarely reversed such decisions.

Anonymous said...

Public (government) schools are a disaster since George W. Bush...the child. I'm a rock-ribbed Republican and Constitutional conservative. When Bush Jr. ran on that "no child (idiot) left behind bullshit, it was no different than the Democrat Lyndon B. Johnson saying he'd "have those n.....s voting for us for the next 200 years". Both were playing to poor people's votes and got them. Now we have a Communist government that is selling it wholesale to everyone. "Let us take care of you."

Anonymous said...

The majority of parents, regardless of skin color, want what’s best for their children. Just because “new” kids hit the rolls of schools in the burbs, doesn’t mean that all is lost. But stay separate. I guess it works for some.

Anonymous said...

Of course there is black flight, and Hispanic as well. Another thing the media and black leaders won't cover is that a handful of black parents and educators have formed charter schools, or home school, or send their kids to private schools if they can. The problem is exactly what 3:04 said - too many minorities bring their values with them to the burbs or don't hold their fellow black community members accountable for self-destructive behavior and values. The schools will NOT enforce high standards. Ain't going to happen. For one thing, they are getting federal money for each minority they enroll. It's even worse if any of the students are Sped. The black parents will complain even worse than white parents if Baby Boy is even looked at sternly by a teacher. I've heard that Madison Schools covers up a lot of their discipline problems. I interviewed there once, years ago, and the three principals on the interviewing panel didn't want to know anything about my academic program - just my discipline plans.

Anonymous said...

7:01, what kind of atmosphere do you have on your planet?

Anonymous said...

What these suburban communities are all learning the hard way is that the biggest challenge to academic success is the proliferation of apartments and rental property. Transient parents can bring their problem kids from one school district to another without stability or commitment, especially the older kids. Home owners of whatever race are generally stable and feel an investment in the community wanting to improve it. This is true in Jackson
and everywhere else. Clinton has done a magnificent job in spite of so many renters from Jackson taking advantage of their good schools but they are swimming against the tide. Time will tell how long they can keep it up.

Anonymous said...

Great job collecting and synthesizing the data.

Anonymous said...

I spoke to a school administrator at Madison Central in 2014 who told me that MC was 88% white then.

I spoke to a teacher at Terry High who told me a large number of their students were Jackson residents who "lived" with a relative. The families knew that as bad as Terry High is, it is still much better that JPS.

Kingfish said...

Admin was wrong. The MDE data shows it has consistently been 26-27% for over 15 years.

Anonymous said...

9:05 : We Hinds County parents are hearing things about Terry High School that would hairlip the Pope. Literally being run by a group of thug kids that have staff and students terrified. Clear bags ? Why ? Weapons on THS school grounds . Why ? How ? With that said, don't know if they are former JPS kids but they are likely kids born to those who migrated up from South Lousiana post Katrina.

This Black Family is staying in Jxn said...

"As someone with kids in public schools at Northwest Rankin, this is not a good thing for the suburbs. JPS transfer students are extremely disrespectful and disruptive to the learning process."

"Single mothers dumping they brat babies on good school districts to raise in the absence of two-parent households."

"This is great news for the private schools! It won't be long before you see Phase II of white flight: leaving what were once great public schools in Madison and Rankin counties to the private schools."

"The problem is that all of these parents wanting a better life for their kids still vote democrat, listen to Al Sharpton and will not denounce the poison parts of the black culture.

Plus, the problems they are running from were created by them and their parents.

You're welcome to go anywhere you desire. Just leave your rap, carjackings, robberies, violence and arrogance behind. We don't want it."



Some folks on this thread tried to speak glaringly of the good "knee-grows" that are their neighbors. LOL!!!! Nice try.

But the aforementioned comments are the silent majority in the surrounding burbs, they moved out there to get away from the black folks and black public officials in Jackson. So with more of "them" moving out there, is a problem and deep concern. No one other than the few that were quoted are actually going to admit it. They don't want their sweet Beth Ann dating Tyrone, LOL!!!!

Don't worry, I am one of the Black Jacksonian's that will not be moving to your neck of the woods anytime soon. I would rather move out of Mississippi altogether than move to the miserable racist suburbs surrounding Jackson.

I have wonderful neighbors, black neighbors, working professionals, and retirees that take care of their yards as well. The lone criminal on our block is some white meth head with a bunch of cars in the yard, that lives with his aging parents, fly's up and down the street in his jacked up pick up truck.

You can come get them so they can stay with y'all in Rankin and Madison!

Anonymous said...

12:31 makes the most racist comment on the whole thread openly basing his hatred on skin color alone yet thinks he/she has the moral high ground.

Welcome to 2022.

Anonymous said...

I just read every post and enjoyed most of them, obviously from a demographic cross-section.

Then comes the post at 12:31, which is nothing more than poking his/her head in the sand and denying the cultural deterioration omnipresent in his/her demographic. Calling people racist for distancing themselves from that cultural decline is not productive and only emboldens your bitterness.

Nobody wants you in their neighborhood - even the retirees who 'keep their yards up' and the imaginary white meth head down the street.

Anonymous said...

12:31 JPS scholar?

"fly's"... Is that an insect that owns something? Maybe try "flies"...

Anonymous said...

HHS is the largest drain on Federal spending. This is not just a personal choice but enabled. Ridgeland being a HUD housing target had results in HS. I never talk to working man or woman, causal contact in PO, small businesses still in Jackson not waiting out.

Anonymous said...

@12:31 PM is likely a troll. But if not, then he wins the internet prize for today's racist.

This Black Family is Staying in JXN said...

@ February 15, 2022 at 1:48 PM - oh, so the other racist comments were acceptable to you?

@ February 15, 2022 at 7:23 PM - my neighbors DEFINITELY love me, I feed them too well. Oh trust me, there's nothing imaginary about those folks! I would take a picture of that redneck's house and yard if Kingfish would let us upload pictures!

@ February 15, 2022 at 8:46 PM - you caught the gist of what was meant - now go eat a butter cookie!?

@ February 16, 2022 at 7:55 AM - not a troll. Just a black resident of Jackson that is comfortable with my neighborhood. I also know a good number of you do not want black neighbors and even quoted people on this thread that made it obvious they do not want black neighbors. But yet, I am "racist" because I am comfortable living amongst my own people. LOL!

It'll be a miracle if Kingfish posts this comment. LOL!

Anonymous said...

9:30 Ok so there are racists out there. Big news. There are all kinds of people with all kinds of fears, problems. But the relevant fact is, nobody racist or not, black or white wants to live in a hellhole of crime and blight. IF THEY CAN HELP IT. That's not racist it's common sense. Fight your battle over something else.

Anonymous said...

Well, if you live in a nice neighborhood in Jackson and black neighbors move in, you find that if they can afford the house, they are successful and well educated and easier to get along with than the ones who moved.

Some of us are learning that no race has all the best and none of the worst...that we have more in common with decent, well educated and civic minded people of other races than we do with the negative and ornery people in our own race.

I think we need to form one large organization for society's good, decent and sane if it's not too late.

I remember hearing one of the " good" Germans lament that they should have joined to stop the brown shirts right away.

Anonymous said...

You should check the stats at Hartfield. Just last week a transfer student
10th grader severely injured a 8th grade boy by beating him.
No suspension or anything. Kid was on the soccer field the same evening.

Anonymous said...

4:40 Who are you addressing and what is it you're wanting to accomplish here?

Anonymous said...

Other than an Atlanta airport, what is Hartfield and why is mention of it appropriate to the discussion?

Also noted is the fact that 9:30 is sort of butt-hurt over being called out by at least four other posters while believing Kingfish won't appreciate his/her hollow retort. What an uncivil, little malcontent we have here...yes, a psychological case-study.

12:31 aka 9:30 is emerging as the psychological case-study of the month. While in the front yard grilling for the neighborhood, he/she believes his/her neighbors love him/her as he/she has visions of white meth-head rednecks (a racist term) just down the street probably spying and plotting. Why can't one simply embrace all their neighbors? Isn't that what the black community has been preaching for decades? Redneck lives matter too...or do they?

This Black Family is Staying in JXN said...

Also noted is the fact that 9:30 is sort of butt-hurt over being called out by at least four other posters while believing Kingfish won't appreciate his/her hollow retort. What an uncivil, little malcontent we have here...yes, a psychological case-study.

12:31 aka 9:30 is emerging as the psychological case-study of the month. While in the front yard grilling for the neighborhood, he/she believes his/her neighbors love him/her as he/she has visions of white meth-head rednecks (a racist term) just down the street probably spying and plotting. Why can't one simply embrace all their neighbors? Isn't that what the black community has been preaching for decades? Redneck lives matter too...or do they?


Actually, I grill in the backyard because it's set up for all my grills. Thank you very much.

As far as the white meth-head (sorry for calling him a "Redneck" - I actually thought it was a term of endearment amongst your kind - but since black people do not take to whites using the n-word too lightly, I will refrain from using Redneck when referencing you people)

but back to white meth-head, no he cannot be embraced because he is a nuisance to the neighborhood and he's a criminal, common thug, and keeps a rather substantial amount of noise with his pick-up truck, as well as the speeds he drives through the neighborhood. Then he does it at 2am, 3am!?

Now we do have a few good white neighbors left and they are most certainly welcome and appreciated. But my original post was targeted at those that made the comments about blacks moving into their neighborhoods. Since they do not want any blacks, by all means, they can come get him and his parents. They fly MAGA flags and the whole sh-bang, I think they'd be very comfortable with them.

and I stand firm on my opinion that it is a miracle when Kingfish posts my comments especially my "retorts"

Anonymous said...

I would love you to correlate the census data with this. I have suspicions that a lot of the people who are attending Ridgeland High School do not live in the district. My suspicions come from seeing kids getting dropped off at a bus stop with a car with a Hinds county tag every morning. This is happening all over the place.


Recent Comments

Search Jackson Jambalaya

Subscribe to JJ's Youtube channel

Archives

Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
.