Monday, June 18, 2018

James Tulp: Yes, This is the President I Want.

Full disclosure- I did not vote for Donald Trump in the primary. I wasn’t overly enthusiastic about voting for him in the general election either. At that point, I was not 100% certain that he was the president I wanted, but I voted for him anyway.

On June 8th, Robert McElvaine wrote a piece for the Clarion Ledger titled, “Is this the president you want?” and asked readers to put aside party affiliation and who you voted for in 2016 while he lists his negative opinions about the man; implying Trump supporters were too stupid or too mesmerized by Trump to think about such things clearly.

I wish I could say this was a refreshing take on the leader of the free world and his supporters. Unfortunately, most of the claims he made have become so common by those in academia and the media (I would know, I work in both) that to say they have become trite would be an understatement.

Let’s go through a few of the claims made about Trump:

“Lies constantly and about everything.” This seems like quite a bold statement not to back up with even one example.

"...has the most corrupt administration in American history." Evidence?

“Knows virtually nothing about history.” I had to smile knowing this was written by a history professor. In other words, if only Trump were a little more like me...

“Thinks only of himself and has never done anything for anyone else. How well would you have to know someone to even make this claim? This statement sounds more like the rantings of a jealous ex than a sober-minded political observer.

McElvaine’s column was published just days after Trump commuted the sentence of Alice Marie Johnson. Ask Ms. Johnson if she thinks Trump has never done anything for anyone else.

Ask the bus driver to whom Trump gave $10,000. Ask the family of the three year old boy with cancer who Trump picked up in his private plane and flew across the country to seek medical care.

Truly, when you consider the life he was living beforehand, the fact that he even ran for president in the first place- subjecting himself and his family to unprecedented levels of slander, ridicule, and threats- is arguably the most selfless act of all. Who among us would give up a billionaire lifestyle to enter into public service, knowing full well the entire media would be in intense opposition every step of the way?

Now, let’s play the same game with a different perspective, one that includes facts.

Without attaching a name or face, without considering the media coverage that has been 95% negative or the brainwashing that goes on in today's’ indoctrination factories masquerading as universities, ask yourself whether you would want a president who:

Annihilated the single wealthiest, deadliest terror organization in the history of the world, a group that the previous president said would take years to defeat, in just a matter of months.


Brought the overall unemployment level to an 18 year low, black unemployment to its lowest ever in recorded history, hispanic unemployment to its lowest ever in recorded history, and female unemployment rate to its lowest ever in recorded history, all while cutting taxes on over 80% of Americans. (I know, I know. The reason Obama’s economy was so bad was because of Bush, and the reason Trump’s economy is so good is because of Obama. Liberal logic.)

Relocated the US embassy in Israel to Jerusalem- a move that has been advocated within both the Democratic and Republican official party platforms since at least 2004.

Appointed justices to the federal courts that fight for religious liberty and strike down state officials who describe freedom of religion as “one of the most despicable pieces of rhetoric that people can use.”

Is potentially on the brink of ending the Korean War.

Signed legislation repealing the extremely unpopular individual mandate that forced people to buy health insurance.

Eliminated nearly two dozen executive branch regulations for every new one signed.

Oversaw the lowest level of illegal cross-border migration for a single year in recorded history.

Trump is far from perfect. He’s a sinful, fallen human being. If you had asked me before Trump took office, I would have rattled off several names of people I’d rather have as president than Donald Trump.

But today, after 18 months of the Trump presidency, I can honestly say that I was wrong.

Despite the unprecedented attacks from a media hellbent on destroying this administration, an opposition party more concerned with insulting Trump than governing, and even members of his own party acting as speed bumps, it would be difficult to find a president who has done better in his first 18 months.

So yes, this is exactly the president I want.

James Tulp is an adjunct professor of political science at Mississippi College and a talk radio host for WYAB 103.9FM.

71 comments:

Anonymous said...

Agreed. He is a sinful person like us all. I'm not sure I'd want to have a beer with him. But the policy results of his administration so far are hard to argue with.

Anonymous said...

The last time I voted was when Perot ran for president. I voted for Perot and have often wondered what the U.S. would be like if he would have been elected.
Since then I have refused to vote simply for the fact I thought none of the people running for presidency were worth my vote.
As soon as I learned Trump was going to run I knew who I would vote for and who would win. Before Trump got in the race everyone I knew said that it would come down to a Bush or a Clinton. Neither one of them would be a president I could vote for.
I am very well satisfied with my president and the job he has been doing. Just think what he could do if people gave him half a chance. Too many people would rather see the U.S. fail just so they could blame Trump.
The next election I will again be right there to put in my vote. I may never vote again but I will be voting in the next election.

Anonymous said...

Well said sir.

Anonymous said...

Just imagine how great a president Trump would be if he didn't impulsively jump on Twitter every other morning and say something stupid. The man is his own worse enemy.

Anonymous said...

Tulp fails again. He feels the need to insult a history professor while he is at it.

Anonymous said...

I think you will see the voters come to their senses in November.

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately, Millsaps is lost. Do they even read the crap their professors write. https://twitter.com/bobmcelvaine?lang=en

Considering Bob McElvaine writes for the Daily Kos should tell you all you need to know.

Good response job Tulp

Louis LeFleur said...

Where is that giant sucking sound coming from? Then there was Stockdale... Who am I, why am I here?


Anonymous said...

No, he is not the president I want and not the one our country deserves.

Burke said...

Check the Wikipedia entry on "Populism." The chief characteristic is "Leader worship." McElvaine is correct on nearly every point he makes, but he needs to bank the fires. Trump understands leader worship, and openly admits that his worshippers will always find a way to rationalize his every flaw. (Dylan said "philosophize disgrace," which all of us do from time to time but not on the scale of Trump's idolators.)

Folks, he is a false god. All this talk about his wonderful policies is horse hockey. He doesn't have policies; he has improv. As one wit put it recently, with reference to his alleged foreign "policy," "With enemies like this, who needs friends?"

Professor McElvaine would do better to take just one of his points and follow it in detail to its logical conclusion. All of human history teaches that pride, the deadliest sin, goeth before a fall. There will be nothing different about this latest fable. Meanwhile, Mr. Tulp should bank his fires as well.

One last thing: Hillary is a ginormous phony. She deserved to lose, but we did not deserve to suffer the consequences, even if we voted for Trump just because we could not bear to vote for what we hope is the Last Clinton.

Louis LeFleur said...


Forgot to include this

Anonymous said...

and on the bottom you shall stay.....

Anonymous said...

KF - I hope you didn't have to pay for this.

Messick said...

Burke, you're quoting Wikipedia?!? Oh, dear...

Look here, man... pages on that thing can be heavily edited by anyone with a contrary or hateful opinion. Pick up an (old) history book and read of the Populist movements in the late 1800s.

And the straw man you create of him being a "god"?? Why do that? I don't know any Trump supporter that thinks like such. Is that what you truly believe?

(FWIW, many people, including those in the media, thought of the last President as their god).

You have come across as educated and sensible in your posts from previous years but there has been some anger of late. Not that you're the only person here...

Anonymous said...

It’s not just Twitter, 3:05. The corrupt Idiot-in-Chief came out today and announced that he was directing the military to create a “space force” as a 6th branch of the armed forces, using the term “separate but equal” to describe its place in the hierarchy. Who is he going to get to run it? Captain Kirk? He’s a joke. He’s not even a real conservative, but because he’s thrown a few of policy bones at the evangelicals and taxcutters and is unafraid to go to war with the mainstream media, he is God in their eyes.

Anonymous said...

Great article, James!

Anonymous said...

Tulp shields his own eyes and curiosity and in so doing fails to see Trumps biggest lie.

Russia interfered and Trump actively sought and received stolen information which Trump used attack a US citizen. This is documented and now admitted.

Tulp is far from an educator. He is an enabler and seeks to be provocative. His pedigree is singed in hate for “liberal elites” who have the audacity to teach things like what’s christ would actually do with our border problems. And Tulp goes way out of his way to forgive a bankrupt, adulterous serial unrepentant sinner.

Wonder what his opinion is of HRC?

Anonymous said...

"Tulp fails again. He feels the need to insult a history professor while he is at it."

A 'history professor'? That may be the title on the edge of his
personnel file, but, he's nothing more than a liberal communist involved in the daily brainwashing of children whose parents can afford to send them to this socialist, private college.

McElwaine has never been relevant, yet he has continued to emerge from the swamp every couple of years, somehow, in the press.

People like McElwaine would last about three weeks in a private sector job.

Anonymous said...

I have commend MC for allowing a professor to editorialize about something other than alcohol and sex. Pleasantly surprised with how far they have profressed in the last 10 years.

Anonymous said...

Mr. Tulp certainly has my respect. Most professors have only theoretical perspectives. It's refreshing to see someone in the academic world capable of learning as well as teaching.

President Trump is doing exactly what he was hired to do. His biggest obstacle is those who despise his success and yearn for his constituents' admiration. Well, guess what? We are going to re-elect him in 2020.

So suck it !!

Anonymous said...

Laughable to see the pious comments above as if uttered by disciples.

Desperate for relevance.

Anonymous said...

I see McElwaine and his brainwashed students have shown up. It is so comical to see the left use the argument of Trump as some type of cult hero or God. How quickly they forget the fainting rally goers at Obama speeches or the cult-like paintings of 'the One' or the singing children like little Hitler Youth led by Obama adoring teachers.

Unlike Obama who received all his adulations without doing anything or producing any results, Trump has actually accomplished all the items listed by Tulp. Now the left might not like tax cuts, Isis on the run, peace in Korea or deregulation and constitutional supreme justices, but those who voted for him do. But, because they do doesn't make the leap of logic to Trump being a God - only someone who tries and accomplishes much of what he says. I like the off-kilter twitter and media jabs becasue they goose the hell out of the fake news and the left so he can keep cutting regulations and making changes that benefit all Americans. And I thought you guys studied Alinsky?

Anonymous said...

Kingfish mines gold again! There's a reason why JJ is Numero Uno!

Anonymous said...

I can’t stop LMAO at Leftist Libtards like Robert McElvaine. Their arrogance makes them stupid enough think we will fall for their condescension and become ashamed of having voted for Trump. Yea it works on those 20 year olds that go to Millsaps, but hey, we all know what they say about being a liberal at 20!

Like you @2:55, I also voted for Perot. But in hindsight, I was very, very wrong! Just think if old lying assed “read my lips” H. W. had been in office through 1996 instead of that p___y Clinton. The vast majority of Americans might not have ever heard of Osama bin Laden and our way of life might not have changed forever like it did on 911.

While I also have been sick and tired of Republicans, especially W, for a very long time, we libertarian leaners and most of those on the right have finally learned to do as the left does and just not give a s__t about integrity. Hell, even the evangelicals voted for Trump; now that’s funny stuff!

And why not? Are we really supposed to take morality lessons from the party of Hollywood, the party of the Kennedy’s, the party of the Clinton’s, etc.?

By the way, if any of you wants undeniable proof of just evil the left is, and just how stupid they really think you are, be sure to watch CNN’s 6 part series American Dynasties: The Kennedys. And for fun, be sure to take notes of every evil act even the propagandists posing as journalist admit that the Kennedy’s committed (you will need a yellow ruled pad with multiple pages). See, if you’re a leftist, you can be an anti-Semite, a Nazi sympathizer, you can lobotomize your 23 year old daughter because she’s too promiscuous (wonder where in the world she got that from???) and you’re worried she might hurt your oldest son’s chances of becoming Prez, you can spin what should have been a court martial into heroism, you can have Chicago rig your election, you can bang the same chic a mob boss is banging while your nepotism brother Attorney General is investigating said mob boss, you can not only just talk about grabbing women by the p___y (like we all know ole Teddy did), you can bag yourself a kill, fail to report would have at least been man slaughter for all of us commoners, fake being hurt, etc., etc. etc., etc., etc. and still be heroes to all of your loyal royalty worshipper leftists; because, well, they (the Kennedy’s) did some bag things, they did some very, very bad things, BUT…

Re: Trump, well he was the only candidate with a set of nuts big enough to take on the Clinton machine; and that just burns leftists up! Can you imagine Jeb Bush or John Kasich in a debate with Clinton, dancing around and walking on eggshells while trying not to offend “a lady?”

So, while Robert McElvaine bitches that Trump “Lies constantly and about everything,” or whether its grab ‘em by the p___y, or Russia, or just about anything shy of child rape, we don’t care, just as long as it ain’t Clinton!

And while he and his Daily Kos pals and other leftists practice their Saul Alinsky tactics, four words come to mind: Get Me Roger Stone!

Anonymous said...

So many snowflakes, so few hotpockets.

Anonymous said...

McElwaine is smart. Ask him if you don’t believe me

Anonymous said...

Total garbage.

Anonymous said...

So the president is a boorish egotistical ass. Big deal. The country got the president it deserves. We've abandoned all resort to common sense and civility in favor of a cult of fake personality and pandering to the wealthy. The whole damn country has become the plaything of a spoiled oligarchy who have no real principles other than their own ego advancement. They laugh and drink their champagne while the suckers fight like cats and dogs over meaningless slight of hand like "democrat" and "republican". A pack of idiots should be led by the most insulting, disingenuous, two-faced, con-man we can find. That ain't Trump...but he'll do!

Anonymous said...

Trump will be re-elected easily.

Anonymous said...

Quoting wikipedia? Better than that moron Lafluer treating SNL sketches like documentaries. I was lucky enough to meet Admiral Stockdale in the late 90s and I can assure you that he had all his wits about him and was sharp as a tack.

Not sure why that burr got stuck under my saddle but it gets real old listening to keyboard commandos rip people they don't know apart based on memes or SNL skits. And you wonder why no one without an agenda wants to run for office.

Macy Hanson said...

Funny. I thought that everyone agreed about Donald Trump.

Anonymous said...

The Hypocrisy of the Left continues to stun me................let's remember the man who won the "Nobel Peace Prize" not because of anything he had completed or accomplished but out of sheer adoration of his "aura" and what he could do or accomplish. Manchurian Candidate built in to complete a mission for leftist socialist Alinskyites ......and thank god we survived him and came out stronger on the other side. Liberals set the tone that personal integrity didn't matter when they failed to halt Bill Clinton in his tracks. Now they are reaping the whirlwind of their decisions. Get over it cuz we just don't care -- our messenger is failed but the message is winning! MAGA!!

Paul Mitchell said...

Robert McElvaine is still here in Mississippi? Why on Earth?

Anonymous said...

Lots of non-thinking haters posting here. Wonder how many are wealthier than they were a year ago? Excluding the Timber investors, of course.

Anonymous said...

His numbers just keep going UP.......

Anonymous said...

Just wait til McElvaine finds out he is not going to get a PERS check. Talk about stupid!

He will be hired by Gannett, though, and be another Bill Minor at 80 years of age. With a shoeshine stand at The Walthall.

Anonymous said...

Idk who Tulp is, but if he can’t google “Trump lies,” he’s not interested in truth.

Anonymous said...

Wonder how many are wealthier than they were a year ago?

I am! Thanks for asking.

Kingfish said...

Those of you griping about his column appearing on his website, just know the traffic has been good for his columns. His hits are more than both Salter and Crawford combined. So you guys are reading it. Don't like it? Oh well. It's an opinion column.

StarRider said...

I like it. Just remember Democrats, Trump is in office because of your insistence on running a deeply flawed, corrupt candidate. You might as well own it, it's your fault. But the hits just keep coming, there'll be no collusion findings, no obstruction charges, and the Trump train will just keep gathering steam through the 2018 elections and his re-election. Who knows, maybe Comey, Hillary, and Barry wind up charged with crimes before it's over. Har har har har har.

Anonymous said...

Kingfish: Who gives a trotting shit about hits or traffic? Well, other than blog-owners and columnists.

Anonymous said...

Take a seat, bulls. I love the “trade war”.....bring those babies down so we can find corrected & right priced bargains. It’s over due.

Anonymous said...

I suspect McElvaine has been studying history longer than Tulp's been alive.

That might explain why Tulp would give credit or assume lasting results of any actions of any President within the first 18 months.


Besides, why should I give more credibility to a talk show host and self proclaimed " adjunct professor of political science at MS College" when that simply means no more than he's part time and not tenured?

Do share his CV with us and his age.

Anonymous said...

Liberals hate America.

cholly said...

I voted against Trump in the primary.
I voted against Trump in the general election.
I don't like Trump.
I also have enough integrity to admit that Trump is off to the best start of any president in memory. We may not like him but he is a very good president. As for his faux pas, does anyone not remember the goofiness that came from the mouths of Clinton, Bush, and Obama?

Anonymous said...

Tulp > McElwain...any day, every day.

Anonymous said...

I think many liberals are wrong to go after Trump for lying or dishonesty, and while I think his persona has negatively affected the standing of the President in this country, at the same time, I could argue that the office of the President was too revered anyway.

However, when there is an actual discussion of accomplishments, there are actual facts to rely on.

1. Annihilated ISIS. Since the creation of ISIS in 2014, American operations have killed 60,000 ISIS fighters and decimated their numbers. Trump's policies were a direct continuation of the Obama administration's policies, and ISIS was essentially done in early 2017. To attribute this victory to Trump, mere weeks after taking office, is incredible. Additionally, I don't know your area of expertise, but there are decades of Muslim extremism in the region to study, and ISIS was just another iteration. While there are very complex foreign policies at work, the reason previous administrations engaged in nation building world wide was because they understood that the problem wasn't as simple as the annihilation of a fighting force.

2. As far as unemployment, I do think the perception of Trump and the GOP taking office supercharged an already good economy. But there are two problems with celebrating this. One, economic cycles are usually 7-11 years long. Neither Trump nor Obama is really responsible for the current economy. From the post-war era to the present, the American economy has followed a nearly flawless wave trajectory. Second, most economists are concerned that the tax cut may have over heated a strong economy. Interest rates and inflation are starting to see upward pressure, and coupled with Trump's tariffs, time will tell if Trump is about to preside over a consumer crisis.

3. The Korean War is far from settled. We will see if Trump is successful, but to even claim that he has done anything in regards to NK is maybe your least credible argument.
He merely signed a document that reiterated a previous agreement's intent to engage in diplomacy. To get that, we had to agree to stop conducting war games with our strongest military ally in the region, a move celebrated by China and Russia. But the biggest reason that meeting with NK was never done by a sitting president is because we gave up our biggest card in any negotiation, legitimacy. A new poll shows that among Republicans, Kim Jong Un is now seen more favorably than Nancy Pelosi. NK has imprisoned tens of thousands of Christians, murdered thousands, and has kept its people in a perpetual state of poverty for decades. And now Trump, has given him a foothold towards respect.

4. Your own administration spent the week telling us that border crossings were actually up over 300%, hence the need to institute a zero-tolerance policy and cause a humanitarian crisis.

Finally, your article lost all credibility, when you, a University professor, called out "the brainwashing that goes on in today's’ indoctrination factories masquerading as universities." Perhaps it is not just indoctrination and maybe there is a causal link between education and political affiliation. Yet a professor from MC, a school that still has mandatory chapel attendance, is calling out other institutions for their forced perspectives.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, so Tulp as a political scientist draws objections when he dares to critique a McElwain because he is not a historian. Yet McElwain's Facebook page shows an interview where he opines that the US is headed toward another Great Depression due to Trump's recent tax bill.

So Tulp can't critique a historian, but historian McElwain can make economic pronouncements that no economist of repute has voiced.

I haven't voted for either party since 1992 but these Trump haters may drive me to Trump simply because I want someone with basic logic and reason in charge.

Anonymous said...

10:38 is long on verbiage, and even longer on overstatement and stretching points beyond fact.

Anonymous said...

And the winner is - 10:38!

Anonymous said...

All truths... He has done quite a bit and so far, I think he has taken his job seriously. Agreed, if only he could keep his mouth shut. But this is the change we want to see and the media is so nasty. Let's talk about all those children being separated at the border... If I go to jail, do I get to take me kid with me?

Anonymous said...

at 10:38 AM Finally, your article lost all credibility, when you, a University professor, called out "the brainwashing that goes on in today's’ indoctrination factories masquerading as universities." Perhaps it is not just indoctrination and maybe there is a causal link between education and political affiliation. Yet a professor from MC, a school that still has mandatory chapel attendance, is calling out other institutions for their forced perspectives.

Please keep up the Trump/Republican voters are stupid, uneducated mouth breathers. It's working so well now.

The second point, no one forces those MC students to choose to go there. Just maybe they like going to chapel.

Theca Jones said...

I can't wait until this upcoming trade war has y'all losing your jobs and selling your pills to pay your mortgages or worse... All to make you feel better about being slightly racist. Enjoy the ghetto.

Anonymous said...

Theca Jones for the dumbest post of the day award. Barely noon and she's into the gin.

Burke said...

Thanks for the kind words, Messick. Maybe I could have cited sources other than Wikipedia, but I support that enterprise.

"Leader worship" is still the chief feature of populism. We don't have to look far. Have you read "Revolt of the Rednecks" by Kirwan, about Vardaman and Bilbo? I expect every state in the union has a "Great White Chief" in its history, but none has ever made it to the White House.

For others here, who are still serving up Obama's failures as a distraction from the Trump debacle: I mostly agree with you. His was a failed presidency. As I've said here before, he was not prepared for the job, and was too proud to fully admit it. Having said that, is the proper response to elect someone who is equally unprepared, and will certainly not admit it?

Anyway, as always, hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

Anonymous said...

Theca Jones,
that's just ignoramt

Anonymous said...


Wonder how many are wealthier than they were a year ago?

. Tip-get you some stocks or mutual funds. EBT ain't increasing.

Anonymous said...

I can't wait until this upcoming trade war has y'all losing your jobs ...

Then we would all have enough time to churn out stupid podcasts that nobody listens to!

Theca Jones said...

"Then we would all have enough time to churn out stupid podcasts that nobody listens to!"

Your wife listens to it. She told me.

Anonymous said...

" Trump is in office because of your insistence on running a deeply flawed, corrupt candidate."

Thank goodness, we certainly dodged a bullet there.

I can't imagine what trouble we'd be in today, with a deeply flawed, corrupt person as President.

Anonymous said...

That's all you got Jones? ROFLMAO

Anonymous said...

"Theca Jones Sez: that's just ignoramt"

This is a first. Criticizing your own post. Har! And calling it ignoramt (sic).....

Anonymous said...

This guy teaches college courses?? I guess like all of trumps’ supporters, no matter how educated or uneducated, have been cajoled by this snake oil salesman. No wonder he calls these people his “followers,” I don’t think we have ever seen a cult this large. Now the rationale behind this zero tolerance policy was a 200 percent increase in illegal border crossings from March 2017-March 2018, but this idiot said we should laud trump for historic lows in border crossings. We should laud trump for low black unemployment and a good economy and it’s “liberal logic” to say the economy is good and Black unemployment is low because of obama. Well, any serious and objective economist will tell you all these positive economic trends have very little to do with trump because they, in fact, did start under obama. After 2010, the black unemployment rate fell faster than any other group in the country but I should believe that trump is responsible for low black unemployment when this trend was already in motion?? Ha! I just hope his stupidity doesn’t mess it up!! Trump couldn’t cough up a good policy if his life depended on it, which is why he has to constantly put on a show to distract from his ineptitude....Hey all you trump “followers” should we now ally with North Korea since trump saluted one of their generals??

brenda said...

Some of you geniuses up there in Comment Land need to know: the moronic Johnny-One-Note Millsaps professor’s name is McEl-V-aine, not “McElwaine”. Do you know how uninformed you come across when you roll out an opinion on someone whose name you can’t even get right?

Anonymous said...

Seriously, is that all you got Brenda? I'd mention starting your own gig but I see you've tried that but don't have what it takes to compete. Nobody beyond his close cronies and hero worshippers really gives damn how McElWhatshisface spells his name.

Kingfish said...

Theca, I don't approve your comments for a specific reason. Email me and I will tell you why. It's a very fixable flaw.

Anonymous said...

DO NOT pee on me and tell me it's raining! We are not idiots and can tell truth from lies. I'm also so sick of hearing Fake News. Just because it may be unfavorable news doesn't make it Fake News!

Anonymous said...

Brenda is a Millsaps grad. Enough said.

Anonymous said...

McElwaine is what the Democratic Party is today. Stalin is smiling.

Anonymous said...

President Trump. Just typing it makes me happy. He IS the person I voted for and wanted to be our president. He is a leader and truly trying to keep us (U.S.) from going off the cliff. Unlike the Democrats, liberals, leftists, and RINO's that are working overtime to bring our country to its demise. Yes, he is the President this country deserves. We deserve a President who loves this country and will stand with her, not against her.

P.S. - The democraps can kiss my a$$! I will NEVER vote for anyone with that affiliation again.

Anonymous said...

Trump has made some good policy decisions. But he is a narcissistic liar and that ultimately will cause him to fail.

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Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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