What are your plans to keep Rankin County crime from coming into Hinds County?
Friday, July 8, 2011
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
27 comments:
Since the crime rate has not dropped in Jackson, perhaps crime will stay where it is.
Oh yeah, the length of time regarding arrest to adjudication in Hinds County sure make criminals want to stay out of Rankin Co. to commit crimes.
Crime is a perception. I know this to be true 'cause I heard Ben Allen say so to the echo of most realtors in the Metro.
Rankin County's crime would be a definite improvement for Hinds County.
Easy to have a perception when there's no news of the crime.
If a crime that took place this week in an upscale Madison neighborhood had happened in the Jackson, the emails would be flying...mostly because Jackson has homeowner's associations which notify everyone.
And, then there was the car break in in Rankin in broad daylight at a " safe" shopping area.
But, the perception on these crimes is that " it's the economy".
@8:48, what is the crime that took place in an upscale Madison neighborhood that you refer to?
Crime in Jackson is Jackson crime, no matter where the perpetrator is from. I think it's ridiculous to say otherwise. If there weren't the opportunity, there would be no crime.
Rankin county takes care of their crime. Jackson should do the same.
8:48, you are right. I know a couple of Madison police officers, and I can tell you, they are very concerned that word will get out about the rampant barking dogs and vandalism of mailboxes going on up there. And they are already preparing, months in advance, for the upcoming Halloween crime wave.
Must not have happened in the "upscale Madison neighborhood" that I live in because we also have HOA that send emails immediately when there is a serious crime. Only thing around here has been kids riding golf carts across lawns, leaving tread marks in expensive sod.
Think they'll move the Viking Classic to south Jackson anytime soon?
I thought the problems in that upscale Madison community was all the kids moving the pineapples in Reunion - reminds me of that old Christmas favorite -
Grandma got run over by a golfcart - setting out the pineapple Christmas eve - you can say there ain't no clubs in Reunion - but me and grandpa we believe -
Tyrone shops at the lowes in Madison because if he did at the one in hinds county they would steal his SUV
Tyrone shops at the lowes in Madison because if he did at the one in hinds county they would steal his SUV
Have mercy....laughed so hard almost shot tea through my nose.
No joke. 8:31. Rankin County's crime would definitely be a definite upgrade. Spin it anyway they want and blame everything and everyone else, but crime is out of control in Jackson/Hinds Co.
Read the leading article in the Northside Sun this week about crime in NE Jackson, Fondren and Belhaven. For the first six months of 2011 police reports indicate that 380 homes have been burglarized in these areas. No wonder people are leaving for Madison and Rankin Counties. While no place is immune from crime, it's a fact either is a safer place to live than Jackson.
http://www.northsidesun.com/view/full_story/14570400/article-Crime-up-?instance=homeopinion
Crime is a perception. I know this to be true 'cause I heard Ben Allen say so ...
All the RINOs like Allen are tough on crime until they need to explain crime away as nothing more than seasonal mosquitos.
Riding golf carts in my neighborhood will get the Madison police called on you in my neighborhood. The neigbhorhood with the highest crime rate in Madison is Post Oak Road next to the dog pound...The police don't seem to care...we are rejects who live in Madison...
Last time I checked I don't see any klukkers driving out to Madison or Rankin to run over black folks.
What everyone needs to understand is that we have to have a large-scale, multi-faceted solution to the problems in Jackson. Sure, it is clear that Jackson has the highest crime rates in the Metro Area. It is really out of control. But don't forget that this city doesn't exist in a vacuum.. Ridgeland is two miles away, and Madison four. If the city fails, you better believe that those same criminals will drive those couple of miles north to commit their crimes.
There is no panacea solution, however. We have to 1) work to improve public education in Jackson (hopefully this next legislative session will pass meaningful education reform/charter school legislation for Mississippi); 2) redevelop older, established parts of Jackson that still have a great deal of architectural and historical value, as well as an excellent centralized location; 3) push for fresh ideas and new developments in the capital city (Two Lakes or something similar to it.. fingers crossed); 4) work to change city leadership to bring forward-thinking, pro-reform, and pro-business leaders to the Jackson city government (don't want to name names.. But Kenny Stokes doesn't quite cut it. There is plenty of talent and intellect in the African American community in Jackson.. if we can just convince them to stay in the city, get involved, and run!); 5) we have to work to encourage higher standards in Jackson and Hinds County law enforcement, and offer them the support they need (same principle as in 4)!, and we need to hold up the great ones with gratitude and esteem and do away with the bad ones); and 6) the short-sighted residents in BOTH Jackson and the suburbs need to understand that what happens in one part of the metro (especially in the large city that lies in its center) ripples throughout the rest of the area. Crime does not know the arbitrary lines of city limits, and it will spill out and overwhelm the entire area (Ridgeland, Madison and even the Reservoir and Brandon, too), if the city fails, and if we don't begin working on these things over the next few years. So it's time to put aside the Jackson vs. Madison vs. Rankin wars and realize the issues for what they are, and then work together to find solutions that are effective and transformative for the entire metro area.
That said, I love Jackson. I understand the risks of living in the city as well. But I also see green shoots and a wonderful vision for the city, as well as for the entire metro area. I love the suburbs for what they provide, and I am optimistic that those of us who see the overarching narrative of history in this metro area will come together to act in this next decade to implement the transformative changes outlined above. That, I believe, is our only hope.
We had all of that 30 years ago.
I'm waiting to see if the break in gets reported. KF can ask around.
As I have said before, I'm not a fan of Ben Allen. Not since the time that, on the air, he ridiculed the people that were calling in to question the fellow that was blowing smoke up everybody's ass about turning Smith Wills into some kind of super venue. We saw how that turned out. Thought that was low class then, still do. Having said that, Ben Allen has lived through more personal crime than most of us will ever have to. Have any of ya'll ever had to shoot a shotgun through the door of your business to drive some thugs away? He seems to really believe what he is promoting, and for that I respect his standing by his beliefs. Sure, I could be a true dumbass and all he is doing is trying to keep his gig going, but, that can't change what he has lived.
Anon 5:42 --
But Kenny Stokes doesn't quite cut it. There is plenty of talent and intellect in the African American community in Jackson.
Yeah. There's....well. Wait, some names will come to me. Give me a year or so.
I hate to tell you this, sir or ma'am, but somebody needs to: A city that re-elects the likes of Stokes and Lumumba by big margins (or no opponent at all) IS A LOST FREAKING CAUSE.
Pro-business and African-American? I don't think Herman Cain lives here. Beyond that, that's right up there with "Farakhan's favorite Jews" and the like. Blacks are Democrats. Democrats hate businesses and the people who create jobs.
Democrats are against school choice and school reform.
You're living in a dream world. Sorry to have to be the one to break it to you. But get real.
6:24 - NOTHING can save Jackson.
1. Public education cannot be improved from the outside. The problem is the lack of a family structure and public schools can neither affect that nor overcome the problems it creates.
2. The older neighborhoods cannot be "redeveloped." The old "urban renewal" projects of the 70s and 80s proved that. Good neighborhoods develop around quality school systems. See 1.
3. New developments require visionary leadership. The leadership in Jackson and Hinds Country is solely transfixed on race and racism. They will never understand the fundamentals of government or governing. They can't.
4. The current leadership in Jackson is a good as it will ever be. The people in power will be replaced by even worse and the downward spiral will accelerate.
5. The same thing is true for law enforcement. What the hell are you going to do when Tyrone becomes sheriff?
Your comment about crime "rippling out" may or may not be true. Certainly Madison County has some problems, but Rankin Country probably has another 40 years of relative calm.
Well said J.Kev and 9:31 .
Yeah, Ridgeland is starting to wake up . A bit behind Madison the City and all of Rankin County ...
but better late than never. The problem in a nut shell, (no pun intended) is that until the testicles of the silent Black conservatives finally drop... and they actually stand up to Stokes and crew, J Town will only get worse.
The current "majority" in Jackson is doing more harm to themselves than the KKK ever did. Same thing on the national level.
Hell, I don't even think Sherman would have torched Jackson three times within two years if he knew the city would kill itself 148 years later.
So much negative race talk. Is this the CL comment section???
I thought this blog was a little better than that.
It is not the responsibility of the suburbs to help the city of Jackson. We left Jackson on purpose and its because Jackson is a total waste. Jackson is already the base of operations for criminal who travel outside the city of Jackson. Jackson has already imploded and there will be no turn aound for many years if ever but that is the task for jackson not the people who live in Madison, Rankin and even the county areas of hinds.
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