Please vote on the sidebar to the right!
Hottest, best looking, most attractive - however you want to phrase it, who do you think is this election's hottest candidate? Of course I had to throw in our own Wilfred Brimley look-alike for fun.
See pictures below:
Top to bottom, left to right: Chris McDaniel, Todd Wade, Lee Yancey, Will Longwitz, Delbert Hoseman, Stacey Pickering, Phil Bryant, Tony Bahou, Mark Sandridge, Josh Harkins, Billy Hewes, Michael Louviere, Malcolm McMillin, Roger Davis, Elvis
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
DWF: New Poll - Hottest Male Candidate
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
62 comments:
Where is the picture of Roger Davis? He's pretty cute.
How funny. I vote for Phil. The hair drives the ladies crazy.
Todd Wade, not Wood.
Where is Tater??
I'd like to request you add Billy Hewes -- I saw him play blues harmonica back in the day at The Subway and it was most definitely hot.
Mark Sandridge??? Must be a homer inclusion.
Tony Bahou has this hands down. Don't see his pic though.
This is open to those you want to add. As for Sandridge, he was suggested to me by someone before I published this. Don't know the man.
D.I. Smith, up in Madison, is a fine lookin' fella too. If you listen to all his BS, It's a wonder he is still walkin' and breathin'. Why, he jumped out of jets six times over Viet Nam just to capture snake dinner for his comrades. And he singlehandedly strangled untold numbers of mercenaries while suffering from a broken arm and foot cramps. His grey hair and stellar background alone make him a shoe-in. Plus he dislikes Tim-Elvis. Go D.I.!
Did someone axe where is Tater? I know I saw a picture of Phil up there somewhere.
The choice is clear: Dilbert, Filbert, Gilbert is by far the hottest.
Ditto on Billy Hewes. He's short but very cute.
Tater would be included if it was a "pudgiest" contest.
Where are the black guys?
Dupree be the man!
I don't see his picture but, I nominate Michael Louvier... Candidate for Madison Justice Court Judge.. He is HOTT!!! Any client of his would agree... You hear it on the streets all the time. Where is his picture?
Leeeeee Yanceeeeey!
Louvier? No way.
Where are Marsha Weems Stacy and Lynn Fitch?
This is the Hottest MALE.
Can't vote on this one. I'm a boar, not a sow. I lack the glands for this poll.
Where is Knoxx, I like a balding man
Billy Hewes looks like an insipid little man. His features are not appealing at all. His demeanor, along with his receding chin, tiny nose and smirky mouth lead me to think of him as one who cannot be trusted. I see no strength in him at all.
Bad Billy, bad bad Billy...
On the other hand, there are others whose looks aren't exactly appealing but their demeanor makes one believe they would live up to their convictions.
anon 1144 you sound like a bitter State Treasurer about to get beat by a very distinguished State Senator (I'm sure you see where my loyalty is). Funny Tate wasn't mentioned. Oh well he'd take a beating in a poll like this one anyway :)
I must say though the photo of Lee Yancey doesn't do him justice.
Tim Johnson? Please no. The sight of him makes me want to wretch.
In all honesty, I think Lee Yancey is very handsome. I've only seen his face on his campaign signs but from the first time I saw one I thought he was good-looking. I found the signs to be more artistic than "creepy" as some have suggested.
Why do so many of these pictures set off my "gaydar"?
Holding out for Chris McDaniel & won't settle for less.
Sheriff McMillin with his shirt off and sweaty with his beer gut hang out. I want everyone to get a picture of that in your heads. >)
How about some tax dudes. Sexy at sixty is the tax assessor of Madisom County.
Madison. Sorry. Screen is tiny.
Lee Yanceeeeeeee
thought you guys were kiddingly calling t johnson 'elvis'. just saw his commercial with footage of his impersonation; OMG! did you see that woman recoil in horror when he hugs/gropes her?? he needs a mental eval
McDaniel!!!!!!
Every citizen of Mississippi should watch this video describing the tyranny of redistricting brought on Madison County citizens by Tim "Elvis" Johnson and his Gang of Four! It is unbelievable that 3 or 4 Supervisors have this kind of uncontrolled power.
can we start a hottest female poll?? because Lynn Fitch wins hands down!!
"can we start a hottest female poll?? because Lynn Fitch wins hands down!! "
That would be a Kingfish project!
I'm sorry, but "Elvis" is just too disgusting, given all he has/is doing to pad his pockets.
Oh dear...I can only guess that some of the "hot" comments are from guys.
Bryant is just creepy looking along with 2 more and set off my flight response.
My gaydar , like Bill Dees', is reacting to 5 but I'm a woman so I'll bet my " gaydar" is more accurate.
My nerd alert is reacting to 2.
And my dumb jock/macho man warning button went off to the rest.
I might would be a friend girl to a couple of these guys but never a girlfriend. I was never desperate!
ROCK AND ROLL MAC!!!!
VOTE MICHAEL LOUVIER ALL THE WAY! DARN GOOD ATTORNEY TOO!!!!
Maybe they are all good dancers.
The Fuhrer was a terrific dancer.
I'm leaning Wade. The thick neck is making me think there may be some decent shoulders under there.
I'm leaning Wade. The thick neck is making me think there may be some decent shoulders under there.
Stiletto, you should see Wade's football pics from the past.
Terry Hawkins
Terry Hawkins
DWF- hmm, interesting.
Well, I'm into shoulders. It's the only reason I hang out with KF. ;-)
I vote for Todd Wade!!!!!
Having known Wade while he was at Ole Miss, I'm voting for Engelbert.
All of these pictures could have the caption: "Don't buy candy from this man."
No offense intended to Billy Hewes, but he sure looks like John Edwards in that picture.
love 8:30's comment!
And how were these guys selected???
Where are the Africian American Candidates?
DWF picked them. Its her poll. don't like it, oh well. Don't vote.
"And how were these guys selected???
Where are the Africian American Candidates?"
None of them are hot (like the Sheriff).
I posted prior to the poll and asked for additional "entries". No one suggested any black male candidates, or they'd be included.
Stokes would have won in a landslide.
Wait there is no Charles Lindsay on the list for hottest candidate, what were you thinking DWF? You know he thinks he is the hottest candidate in town. I think all of Rankin County needed that good laugh. All I can say is ewww.
DWF I agree with Anonymous from the other comment page. I think there needs to be a least hottest male candidate poll, Lindsay would definitely win.
I think that Terry Hawkins is handsome.
How about Jimmie Caudle, Constable Candidate Hinds County? I like a man in uniform!
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