Red Lobster shut down recently.
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
54 comments:
Thanks Chuck. Your crime infested city has taken away one of my favorites. Again!!!!!!
One of your favorites? Bro …
On Yelp it states that it will re-open on August 4. The reviews on Yelp and on Trip Adviser are terrible.
It’s about time!
Of course it's closed for good
They lasted way, way longer than I'd have ever thought.
Bet they reopen outside Jackson... probably somewhere like Pearl or Clinton.
Where will they reopen. Madison? Flowood? Gluckstadt?
The next Hwy 80 disaster in the making.
Horrible food….stopped going to it several years ago
Food was terrible last time I was there. I mean if you can fry fish and chips in Mississippi unfortunately it’s time to go.
Madison can have them. Red Lobster with tacky Corinthian columns…
Who cares? It’s red lobster.
However, if they’ve gone through the trouble of setting a reopening date of august 4 (which would make relocation very unlikely), then im inclined to believe them until august 4 comes and goes. This is a complete non-story through and through fed by Kingfish to the redneck contingent of his readership who just want something—anything—to bitch about Jackson. How cheap!
Red Lobster’s time is up……everywhere.
Haven't eaten there in years but did like their garlic cheese biscuits. Back in the 70s (seems like they were farther south than the current store), they would have all you could eat king crab legs on Sunday night. At the beach recently, they had some giant crab legs that were $44 a lb. We did enjoy them for family meals on special occasions such as birthdays and things after Church, but again, that was years ago.
Mark my words, if you interrupt the flow of crab legs in Jackson, there will be rivers of blood flowing through the streets. Oceans, I say! City fathers should act now, and they should act fast; the citizens of Jackson will not look benignly upon being denied crab legs.
What surprises me is not that Red Lobster is closing but that Olive Garden is still open.
If you look at Yelp (or any other reviewer) you will see that Olive Garden is the lowest ranked of any Olive Garden in the US.
It is a reflection of the people who run it and work there.
How it stays open is a mystery.
I look forward to ZeroBear giving us their version of the cheddar bay biscuits!
I am amazed that it stayed open this long. The only place that served worse food was Capt John's. Ugh!
This is a complete non-story through and through fed by Kingfish to the redneck contingent of his readership who just want something—anything—to bitch about Jackson. How cheap!
Actually I'm convinced Kingfish pubs these stories to draw out the reflexive Jackson-is-fine crowd living in denial and it appears the strategy has worked once again.
Since this story was also reported by at least one of the TV Newsers, did you contact their News Editor or Station Manager to complain? Of course you didn't.
@6:47
For $44/lb, I'd expect live lobsters to my door.
11:18 PM you can keep your Red Lobster, your trashy thugs and your backwoods hicks.
Olive Garden and Red Lobster in Jackson, Mississippi have both been trashy, loud and poorly staffed for fifteen or more years.
Bonefish and Outback are owned by the same corporation. I look for Bonefish to go belly up within another year.
You can find the original Cheesy-biscuit anywhere. No need to wait for Zero to publish his wife's relative's friend's recipe.
The worlds largest food corporate umbrella is...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darden_Restaurants
This is temporary while they rearm, reload, and replenish their ammo supplies.
Madison is a beautiful, thriving City, despite Queen Mary's Corinthian Columns and other fake-eyelash-architectural indulgences. I remain impressed by Richard Dean's Renaissance shopping Center in Ridgeland, a masterpiece for its carefully balanced style, sans fake eyelashes.
I was there on opening night sometime around the late eighties. It was a long, long line of people waiting.
"Last Night at the Lobster" is a very good 150 page novella. By Stewart O'Nan. We need more Cheddar Bay Biscuits!
For those of us that considered Red Lobster fine dining...we are saddened by this announcement.
Haven't been to Red Lobster since we moved from Meridian to Clinton over 8 years ago, but I can still close my eyes and taste the cheese biscuits. In Meridian, we would go there for their Caesar salad with shrimp. Always cold crispy and always tasty in Meridian.
Didn't the Jackson location have the reputation for getting your vehicle stolen off the lot while you were inside asking for another basket of free cheese biscuits?
They could move it to Clinton and I wouldn't complain. Maybe I should buy a box of cheese biscuit mix from Sams. I always slow down and look at it when we shop there, but have never yielded to temptation because an easy source of cheese biscuts is the last thing I need to add to my dinner table.
8:54 am
"wife's relative's friend's recipe"
You are a cleaver investigator guy and I salute you! I had hoped to keep my website a secret. Since you have outed me I guess I'll share the website with everyone else.
www.Mywifesrelativesfriendsrecipe.com
Shooter McGavin wouldn’t even eat there when someone offered to buy his meal. Good riddance.
Red Lobster Cheddar Biscuits
Red Lobster biscuits are loaded with Cheddar cheese and brushed with seasoned butter in this easy copycat recipe. No kneading is required — just drop the gently mixed batter directly onto a prepared baking sheet and your warm, freshly baked, bite-sized biscuits will be ready to enjoy with dinner in just 15 minutes.
Recipe by cookingmaniac Updated on February 3, 2023
Tested by Allrecipes Test Kitchen
Prep Time: 10 mins
Cook Time: 15 mins
Total Time: 25 mins
Ingredients
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon garlic powder
⅔ cup milk
⅓ cup butter, softened and cut into pieces
1 large egg
2 tablespoons butter, melted
2 teaspoons dried parsley (Optional)
1 teaspoon garlic powder (Optional)
Directions
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C). Grease or line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
Stir flour, Cheddar cheese, baking powder, salt, and garlic powder together in a bowl.
Stir milk, softened butter pieces, and egg together in a separate bowl. Add to the flour mixture and stir until just combined and chunky, being very careful not to overmix.
Drop batter by tablespoonfuls onto the prepared baking sheet.
Bake in the preheated oven for 10 minutes.
Meanwhile, stir melted butter, parsley, and garlic powder together in a small bowl. Remove biscuits from the oven and brush melted butter mixture over top.
Return to the oven and bake until golden brown, about 5 more minutes. Serve warm.
Tips
You can make larger biscuits if desired, just adjust the baking time.
July 22, 2023 at 4:55 AM, to come on another man's website, anonymously of course, and denigrate said owner of the website, who isn't anonymous, because of the subject matter, is also cheap. Since, you are, or at least present yourself as such, knowledgeable, in all things cheap, should we take your post as a professional opinion? Old wise cheap skate, what sayeth thou?
Here is the thing, having been around the food industry years ago, and actually in Jackson, when you see this type of closure. Its usually for two reasons: 1) renovation or 2) infestation. since there was no notice of the first in advance, then I would bet on the second. The infestation can be brought in on the clothing and personal effects of the clientele, and very much so by who they buy their food products from. I would also be willing to bet both. A good way to figure out where you would want to dine, is ask your own pest man. they know and they talk. If they re-open on the 4th and no new aesthetics. INFESTATION
@Zerobear - bad link
I had not been to the current Jackson location of Olive Garden in the past 6 or 7 years where as with family we'd enjoy it every few months. That being said, I've been 3 times in the late afternoon early evening in probably the past 2 months, and I must say, the service and the food are surprisingly good to excellent. I think they've shaped up the ship over there, if you haven't been there in a while you really should try it out.
7:27 How will we know the difference between how Jackson's majority act now vs how they will act if RL doesn't reopen?
Speaking of things going wrong in Jackson, I recently called 311 to report traffic signal outage but 311 is not working. So I called Mayor’s office to report 3 traffic signals along Bailey Avenue that had been out for months. The lady in the Mayor’s office told me that the reason the traffic signals didn’t work was the fault of the state sending Jackson’s money to Rankin County to build those stores on Lakeland Drive that were supposed to be built in Jackson. So I guess the reason all the good restaurants were supposed to be built in Jackson but the state sent the money to build them to Rankin County.
Kind of off topic, but back in the day... (1970's) ... the new Long John Silvers at the intersection of Ellis Avenue at Gallatin Street was quite a good fast seafood joint for it's first few years.
But that's a long gone time and era.
"Madison is a beautiful, thriving City, despite Queen Mary's Corinthian Columns and other fake-eyelash-architectural indulgences. I remain impressed by Richard Dean's Renaissance shopping Center in Ridgeland, a masterpiece for its carefully balanced style, sans fake eyelashes."
July 22, 2023 at 9:03 AM
Some of us moved to Madison FOR what, TO YOU, are "fake-eyelash-architectural indulgences". Those features which distress you so, are GREAT MARKETING TOOLS. There's a reason why Madison attained primacy, and attracted the movers-and-shakers. One glance at the town, and people know it's NOT ORDINARY. People who, themselves, are not ordinary: people who want MORE, are attracted to Madison.
For those who want LESS, there's a place called "The Rest of the World". I bet you could find it on a map, if you really tried.
But have no fear: Madison seems to have had a Changing of the Guard, and the new buildings going up, are as plain-&-repressed as the ones in Gene's Little Brick Hooterville, next-town-over.
@9:37, it was a different demographic in the 80’s. Jus sayin…and you didn’t have to worry about being carjacked or your car being broken into. After awhile a business has to make a decision about where they operate. Here is an Example, Your commercial auto is more expensive to insure if you have a jackson address. Business property insurance is more also if you have to cover losses inside a city that has 1. Numerous attorneys , 2: sky high crime rate.
" Gene's Little Brick Hooterville, next-town-over. "
Gawd... that's funny as hell coming from a upset Madison resident.
Anyway, without getting into Corinthian, Ionic or Doric Columns...
the big question in Madison "the city" remains what is real stucco and what is fake stucco ?
@1:41
ZeroBear posted neither a “link” or a URL.
And it was clearly a decent boomer “dad” joke to anyone with an IQ above room temp.
Walmart Carrie’s the frozen Red Lobster cheddar biscuits. Kroger has had them as well.
Will the employees have to "claw back" their lost wages?
One day summa you people will figure 'Queen Mary' out. Sadly, some of you never will. But, that's OK too.
Her personal motto has always been:
Recruit
Use
Discard
Destroy
Ridicule
How long one remains in the second category depends entirely on blind allegiance.
3:58 Don't think Ellis ever intersected Gallatin... but I could be wrong.
@12:13. You're not wrong. I was about to ask the same thing. Ellis runs almost parallel to Gallatin, even after Gallatin changes to Bailey north of Fortification.
Red Lobster is not quite classy enough to be courted by accepted in Madison. They don't feature chicken on the drive through menu.
Some of you will find out the truth about The Queen one day.
This Red Lobster in the late 90’s was a happening place! $10 Cover to get in and two bands nightly. Outdoor and indoor bars going at the same time. It was awesome place. Shot girls, bouncers etc. Good times were had by all. Even a few bar clearing fights and a shootout (by white people) in the parking lot! Who remembers that?
2023 Jackson is so much worse than I thought it would be. And I expected it to be very, very bad.
-a person who left Jackson in 2003.
"the new Long John Silvers at the intersection of Ellis Avenue at Gallatin Street was quite a good fast seafood joint for it's first few years." I think you mean Ellis and Lynch...
I seem to remember a Long John Silver’s on Ellis Avenue near the intersection with John R Lynch Street back in the early 80s. Last time I dared to venture into that war zone it was a seedy looking pawn shop.
RL temporarily closed for renovation.
https://www.wlbt.com/2023/07/24/north-jackson-red-lobster-will-not-join-list-national-chains-along-i-55-shut-down-permanently/
Long John Silver(s) has never been a quality place. That breaded fish, or whatever you call that plaster of Paris coating, is indistinguishable from gar soaked in soured milk and tile grout.
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