Friday, October 18, 2019

The Belhaven Tax Increase Drive Begins

The drive to raise taxes on Belhaven property owners began last night.  The Greater Belhaven Foundation posted on its website:

Thank you to everyone who came out on Tuesday October 8 to be one of the first residents to sign our Petition to form a Community Improvement District. We got off to a great start but let’s keep this momentum going! Please see below more dates that Petition will be out and about for you to sign. If you would like to schedule a time to sign please email me at A copy of the Petition is also available for signing at NeighborHouse, 1104 North Jefferson Street. Website post with tour stop dates.

Hmmm..... why doesn't the Foundation post a copy of the petition online?  Just curious. 


Anonymous said...

So glad I left that neighborhood. It is full of liberals that whine about public school funding while they send their own kids to SA or Prep. Meanwhile bums and thieves roam the backyards and live in the back of Laurel St. Park. Every day the nextdoor page was full of camera footage of random crooks prowling around people's houses. I wish it would have been better, but I'm not paying way over the tax of Madison or Rankin to live with horse cart roads and a pistol on my nightstand.

Anonymous said...

To create the need to sign, they have to make the petition somewhat scarce ... otherwise people would view online and simply forget about it.

I circulated a petition to sign once but after awhile, I realized it was just easier (and equivalent in the signer's intent) to count email statements as signatures.

Anonymous said...

It looks like they are all about the appearances, though. Take a look at those photos. In typical Jackson form - a portly dude in a poorly fit blazer (no tie), two frazzle-haired ladies with cheap wine in plastic cups.

All they need is Robert St. John to make a cameo!

Anonymous said...

This is like a chicken hiring KFC for protection and safety. They will pay the taxes but surely will not get the services that they are expecting.

Anonymous said...

10:01 am Belhaven had a fun party when you left. Thanks for leaving.

Anonymous said...

Belhaven is a piece of crap. I am pro Jackson and can admit it is full of liberal Jackson whiners who send their kids to Prep or SA while pushing JPS and #GreatThingsJXN crap on us. What a joke.

Anonymous said...

Let the daily hate begin!

Just as long as you click and hate and hate and click

Bombs away!

Anonymous said...

@10:01 - Bye, Felecia! Glad to have your sour puss out of the neighborhood!

Anonymous said...

In order to post something negative about a place you don't live one has to have really low self esteem.

Anonymous said...

Goatees are push up bras for men

Anonymous said...

My sister and bro in law live in belhaven he's an ortho doc and she's a RH country club housewife that looks down on my family bc my kids attend Madison public schools and her 3 kids attend st Andrews. Typical mentality of these people. Oh she posts pics of there house at the beach because she is insecure or to just promote herself. Like I said typical left wingers...

Anonymous said...

I wish I could afford to live in the Belhaven/Fondren area. Despite the shitty roads it still looks like more fun than Flowood.

I saw a Belhaven home that was 2 bedroom 1 ba, no garage, come up for sale for $250k and spit brandy all over my iPad.

I kept an eye on the listing and it sold within the month. People want to live there.

Anonymous said...



Anonymous said...

I live in Belhaven and DO NOT support this tax increase. We are Taxed Enough Already (TEA) and the solution is to pressure the City of Jackson to get their sh@t together and provide services to its best citizens. Belhaven is the crown jewel of Jackson and city leaders need to acknowledge this!

Anonymous said...

I don't personally have an opinion or agenda on Jackson, but Do you posters not understand what the tax raise would be going to? Maybe things that would make it less of "a piece of crap" like yall call it... Street improvements and increased security? Kingfish could just say the word Belhaven and people start saying "liberals who send kids to Prep or SA". The crowd who lives there is not the point, but some like to highjack a post into that.

Anonymous said...

The Belhaven is where The Fondren sends its trailer trash.

Anonymous said...

"Belhaven is the crown jewel of Jackson..." Kinda like a diamond in a goat's ass?


Anonymous said...

12:47PM, dang. Thanksgiving at your house is going to be fun this year.

Anonymous said...

@1;07 at least you are willing to admit it is a piece of crap. But one question: why do we need tax increases? Aren't we taxed enough in jackson?

Anonymous said...

1:09 - so you drank the kool-aid that David Blount, Walter Michel, and the Eastover group of Ben Allen sold?

Now that they got the law passed, they are admitting that the money that can be raised from this new tax won't be nearly enough to pave ANY roads. Or fix any drainage. Or any of those other things that they claimed all while trying to get this tax increase passed.

Yes, I live in Belhaven, and in my opinion I already pay way more taxes than should be required - and that doesn't consider the fact that we are getting little or nothing for those taxes. (No police protection, no infrastructure, nothing.)

At the meeting a few months ago at Barrelhouse, Senator Blount ADMITTED that the amount of taxes collected wouldn't be used for any of those things that were claimed while pushing to pass this law.

In his words, the money would be used for 'beautification projects, park improvements, and landscaping'. As he went on to say, these had been being paid for by volunteer contributors, but they didn't have enough money to do all that they wanted to do.

And now with this new tax - according to Blount - they can make the FREELOADERS pay their share."

Count me in the group that do not support this effort by some to raise everybody's taxes - instead lets make the city start spending the tax money they collect for the important things (public safety, infrastructure) and stop funding golf courses that provide nice petty cash for the city employee operators; failed convention centers; the zoo; straight piping operators; --- how long a list needs be made.)

Dan Hise said...

Kingfish is fond of baiting his followers, and I suppose he keeps his numbers up when they attack the chum like starved sharks. And there are followers who crave attention, which I may be guilty of myself. To paraphrase Milton, the desire for attention, even for fame, is the last indignity of a noble mind. We can't shake it no matter how saintly we are.

I have lived in Belhaven since 1973, in a house that was built in 1923. During the first two decades I lived here, it was accurate to call Belhaven "an elephant jungle," because it was heavily populated by Republicans. They were all or mostly all good people, who cared about good architecture and houses with a history, but they mostly lost interest in living in a "transitional" city. Tribalism prevailed, as it always does. And yet, my neighborhood is no bastion of liberalism, unless one defines a "liberal" as someone who voted for Reagan. I didn't vote for Reagan, but under present circumstances I would up a good chunk of my IRA to have someone like him back in the White House. It's all relative. (I'd prefer Steve Bullock, if you wish to know. Check him out.)

There are a thousand or more neighborhoods across the U. S. that are like Belhaven, and their residents are not going to give up a way of life just to sleep without a weapon nearby. (I have a sidearm, but maybe a shotgun would be better.} Thanks be to fate and Pennington & Trim that I have never had my sleep interrupted. We have always had adolescent vandals roaming around, peering into cars in the early hours, most of them harmless, but there is no question that it is a damnably annoying and sometimes dangerous fact of life around here. Even our quasi-black mayor lives on a gated cul-de-sac, but there are at least a score of entry points where I live. If a CID will lead to more vandal apprehensions, then bring it on. With apologies to Bob Dylan, maybe the pumps will work.

People move out of Belhaven, which is not unusual since many of the houses are "starter" houses. They certainly move because they've had too much of vandalism and burglary. And yet, and yet. Jackson has an awful past. The burden of history is heavier here than in most other places around the country. If one acknowledges the reality of our history, I believe one is more inclined not to hide from it. (Hear that, Mayor Lumumba?) I do not begrudge my many friends who have gone on from Belhaven, many of them for good reason. I often think of doing so myself, but that conversation with myself ends quickly. Where would I move? I can't think of another place that would have have as much "there" there. Walker Percy wrote about his desire to be someone somewhere rather than anyone anywhere. I took his words to heart, where they still abide. They always will. I'm sorry if anyone finds my use of that language offensive, but I cannot not say it.

So, live it all the way up, my neighbors in Belhaven, Fondren, Eastover, Mid-City, LOHO, Downtown, West Jackson, South Jackson, Presidential Hills, and on and on. Let the circle be unbroken.

Anonymous said...

12:47 - Can you imagine how simple it will be for her to identify you or for others to identify THEM? Have fun at Thanksgiving.

Anonymous said...

GBF includes both Belhaven and Belhaven Heights. Regardless of your opinion, Belhaven Heights residents do NOT send their kids to “SA and Prep.” — most are hoping not to get murdered walking to their car.

Also, let’s not forget that a large portion of both neighborhoods are (generally unmanaged) rentals. Landlords are not going to be keen on a new tax with some unknown potential for long-term returns. The economics don’t work.

Have there been any concrete plans made public in regards to the use of the funds or how much they’ll collect? PIDs are a novel idea but (much like HOAs) have the real potential for abuse. The more I think about how much sense it makes to get everyone to pay their share to improve the neighborhood, the more I’m glad I don’t own property there.

Anonymous said...

"Colored" chick tending bar. Priceless.

Anonymous said...

Belhaven is one of the few "real city" neighborhoods in Jackson (The Fondren and downtown being the others).

Anonymous said...

The Belhaven foundation is interested in cosmetics. The new street signs really look nice. Real estate turnover at higher prices and people fixing up their property is the hopeful outcome of these new levies. The secret aim is to hire a private army to guard the beautified homes.

Anonymous said...

One question and two observations.

" my neighbors in Belhaven, Fondren, Eastover, Mid-City, LOHO, "

What is LOHO ?

" The Belhaven is where The Fondren . . . "
" Belhaven is the crown jewel of Jackson... Kinda like a diamond in a goat's ass? "

I've been laughing all afternoon at those two comments.

Anonymous said...

Nothing will work in Jackson. This is just Window dressing that is too little too late.

Anonymous said...

If the state treasury can pay $2 million for a private road for Tate to get to Dunkin Donuts they should pay the entire amount for the Belhaven CID and no tax increases will be needed.

Anonymous said...

I think Belhaven is a great neighborhood and am not overly cynical about Jackson in general. BUT, the CID is a scam, and the liberals are in on it......with the right wingers, though.

The commentor that doesn't think that the slumlords are voting for it is dead wrong and doesn't understand that their tennants, who won't get a vote will foot the bill--they have all signed on to the petition--ask them--they signed it first after meeting with the senator to plan it out.

The push is by the sellout Senator, the former City Councilman, the current City Councilperson and the new neighborhood XD, who all promised to do it to appease a wealthy resident who has funded all of his children to live in the 'hood, and who spends vast amounts to 'prop up the neighborhood' in numerous ways, previously in the name of good citizenship. The new XD is pretty stoked, because that person will have a big say on how the money is spent, but that person will be very beholden to the resident who has already spent alot of $$$$ on making the place prettier.

Its not a big secret to anyone that does business downtown. Just another downtown jackson partners type scam to benefit a few big red wine guzzlers.

Anonymous said...

🎶We shall overcome.......

Anonymous said...

Dan Hite - So, you managed to get the attention you so desperately sought. There's your post, in real time with imaginary glitter and unicorns and everything. And your words validate exactly what most all the posters have said...A liberal bastion of egotistical, snobbish snoots.

PS: Nobody cares that you don't like Trump. Meds are available. You have roughly six more years of him.

Anonymous said...

I lived in Belhaven for decades and still own a rental property there. It was mostly a wonderful place to live, and I can imagine living there again in a later season of life. I loved living in a place with history, great and varied architecture, and proximity to natural spaces.
After college (at Belhaven) many of us stayed in the neighborhood and lived close enough to each other to walk between houses, get together often, and enjoy real community. We had groceries, restaurants and bars all within a few blocks. We also had mud riding and bonfires on the river. All without ever leaving the neighborhood. It was a great time of life that I miss. It makes me think of the line from a Gram Parsons song- “I bought a little cottage, in a neighborhood serene”. Belhaven is that place for many of us, and at least for a time we take certain risks to maintain and preserve a way of life worth keeping. And yes, in this case, I support an extra tax toward that end.

Anonymous said...

Belhaven citizens will have to police their private police force... which is a big job!!! These private security companies will be Middle East war vets in a Belhaven uniform. A disaster could occur that would set off a civil war if the citizens don't demand and exercise the proper oversight of these soldier turned civilian policemen. Why not demand accountability from the police force already serving citizens? Or demand the Mayor and our representatives cough up a citizens board to see what is happening beneath the police administration?

Ophelia said...

Ah, well, Jackson. I am not overly fond of similes and metaphors—they must be handled carefully— but Jackson seems to me like a once-lovely, vibrant girl, perhaps not the brightest or wittiest, but certainly great fun, and one you were rather proud to claim. Now, many years have passed, and her “blear eyes fallen from blue” gaze bitterly and blankly from a bloated, ruined face, and the occasional fleeting glimpse of what was is a cruel tease. Well, there the metaphor breaks down, I suppose, because while there reaches a point where it’s just too late to dump a shopworn old spouse—for financial reasons, or dogged loyalty, or simple weariness—one CAN always move away from a city that has failed to age graciously, that has rotted instead of mellowed.

I’m not quite of an age that can truly recall the lovely former city, but parents and grandparents tell of it, and the vivid accounts of Misses Welty and Capers bring it alive nicely. Perhaps that is Belhaven’s hold on certain imaginations: here and there, in certain beautifully-preserved dwellings, something of the former “custom and ceremony” can be glimpsed, however fleetingly.

Jackson has been doomed for some time, for the tired old elephant-in-the-room reasons, but God bless the Belhavenites for valiantly trying to keep a bit of its lustre intact. They certainly deserve praise, not censure, from the sniggering pasture-dwellers who flock to this site.

Ophelia said...

To 4:55 p.m.: LOHO is the acronym for Leftover Homeowners. “Leftover” refers to the portion of Eastover Drive west of Ridgewood Road, and the streets running perpendicular to it. The name is intended to distinguish it from the neighborhood known as Eastover—you know, the fancy one. Leftover has lovely large lawns, huge old trees, some charming mid-century houses, and quite a nice vibe.

And 6:54! The one who needs a calming cocktail laced with Seroquel is YOU, methinks. “Imaginary glitter and unicorns”? Whatever school of writing you attended—you were overcharged.

Wow said...

These type of ideas, if executed with patience, could have lasting impact. Unfortunately, reactionary thinking and shortsightedness seem to be the standard way of governing and operating at all levels of government. I would be in full support of this resolution if conditions for this increased tax included that we would not touch this money for at least 10 years, ideally a lot longer (imagine 50), and that then we would turn these funds into a trust /endowment where we could only leverage only 3-5% of it annually for certain reinvestments back into the neighborhood. Imagine the lasting impact and sustainability for Belhaven if such a fund would be executed in this manner.

But this would be asking people to actually do this for the neighborhood. Not for themselves. To invest in something some would not live to see. I will keep dreaming.

-Belhaven homeowner

Anonymous said...

Only God is able to get this city on track.

Anonymous said...


Huh huh!


Yeah . . huh huh . . huh huh !


Someone said The Fondren.


Yeah, The Fondren, The Fondren . . . huh huh.

Anonymous said...

It isn't like the residents of Belhaven were the first to come up with the idea of taxing themselves to improve their neighborhood. Many neighborhoods across the country do the same thing.

Tucson, Arizona just passed a similar CID this year. I have been to Tucson several times. It is a beautiful city and home to UA.

I live in Belhaven and, like the rest of us, have to deal with the constant questions of "why do you still live there?" or "What is wrong with you?" Now, I am not going go on a rant of why I don't want to live in Madison/Rankin, they are fine areas and I'm sure people love their homes in those counties as much I love mine in Belhaven, but I do wonder why the people that live in those communities care so much about what we choose to do here?

I don't berate my friends because they choose to live in subdivisions where their homes resemble everyone else's homes. That this their choice.

I like potholes, poor city management and sleeping with a sidearm on the nightstand. I'm also going to vote to tax myself.

Cynical Sam said...

This thread has so much win! But it's about The Belhaven, not The Fondren.

Carry on. I'll be in the area all weekend, you witty wordsmiths.

Dackbart Gobbert, III said...

"...proximity to natural spaces." Really?

And my, my, Ophelia. The one who fancies herself a writer, pretending to be a soft blanket, yet girded well with daggers and bitter puffery. One need not attend a 'school of writing' to recognize the fact that another can't get away with calling a sugar-coated turd a candy bar.

Acronyms, lovely lawns and a nice vibe - a thick cocktail existing chiefly to lull the wealthy into a perpetual state of delusion and piety. "Get the hell off my lawn", said Leftover's Eastwood to the boy from Southover. "My gardener is on the way and I'll have him disinfect the area where you stand!"

Enjoy the fall season amidst the gunfire. I'm left wondering if there's a count of opioid consumption in the fancy quarter.

Ophelia said...

Well, Mr. Gobbert, I wondered about the “proximity to natural spaces” bit myself, and try though I might, I can’t think of any near Belhaven, except for The Lefleur park where the museums are, Mayes Lake, etc.? Maybe that is what 7:46 was referring to?

I wonder, as well, how familiar you are with Jackson. Your paragraph about Leftover was nicely turned out, and with a couple of minor tweaks could have come straight from the script of “Look Back in Anger”(a play by John Osborne; read it and ask yourself if you aren’t just a wee bit Jimmy-Porterish?) Anyway, your very funny imaginary scene about the lordly homeowner ordering his gardener to disinfect the violated lawn would have been more apposite if aimed at EASTover, where the real swells dwell, not innocent, firmly middle-class LEFTover.

Oh, dear, look at the time! Must dash, I fear, although I have so enjoyed chatting with you. Meanwhile, would you like a candy bar? I fear the housekeeper forgot to order the Vosges Haut Chocolat, so here—have a Snickers.

Anonymous said...

Moved to fondren 5 years ago from Buckhead... it's a neighborhood in Atlanta. They have the same CID..Atlanta has revived.

Cynical Sam said...

Ah ha! Now I recognize the witty wordsmith. It's Grandview Gloria. You get around girl. Keep it coming.

Anonymous said...

Well there is just something about Belhaven isn’t there? All the love and hate speaks for itself does it not? Maybe these liberals who all have to sleep with a firearm by their beds represent all of our futures and it makes us mad? Madison won’t look like Jackson in thirty years? Who believes that isn’t true? Y’all need to take notes on how they live and prepare to try and copy that. Only time will tell If the pasture dwellers can do it as well.

Anonymous said...

It takes a special, sad boomer to log on and comment on another neighborhood trying to improve itself. Get a life, granddad. You're welcome for my Social Security and Medicare contributions.

Anonymous said...

10:10 pm

Good points.


One reason why Madison hates happy Belhaven and Fondren residents is their own misery.

Haters there are angry...they were forced to move away from Jackson because the public schools are failures....and more to the point - they could not afford or did not desire to afford (really can’t afford) to send their kids to JA, Et al. So now, having admitted to being too poor to live like the Jones in Jackson, they have to act like they enjoy public education at Madison Central or Germantown.... It’s a very difficult task....putting up a front like burns inside.

Now add to that other related causes:

- they now drive 2 hours a day (480 hours a year) to live in a place they are forced to say they like;
- they can’t be seen to be “wrong” by moving 10-25 miles away and investing in a box that looks remarkably like the box next door;
- they owe more money now in their new box and that weighs on them
- they hate that others can make Jackson work for them when they could not...jealous.

Add to it the usual angst and drama that goes with marriage and kids and keeping up with the Jones....

Those are the ingredients that create MadisonHateJacksonItis.

So keep on hating and soon enough it’ll eat through your soul....and you’ll be divorced and back at Martins at the end of the bar....broke, toothless, and drunk....but happier than you are now.

Anonymous said...

The Belhaven Town Center idea near Baptist Hospital is going to work out well if they can capture the stormwater runoff. The gentry should then exercise their virtue and advocate for revitalization in other marginalized areas where no large public institutions exist. Other areas with deep social dysfunction of have to possess a certain amount of virtue to even accept help. In these depressed areas, the Christian churches and public schools have to lead their neighborhoods and insure vital public services.

Cynical Sam said...

Do I detect a new psychological ailment?

MDS Madison Derangement Syndrome

You read it here first.

Madison is taking applications until December 31. After that y'all south of the border (County Line Road) are stuck there for life. Sucks, don't it?

Mayor Baby Chok doesn't seem so bad, right?

Anonymous said...

9:01, 10:10pm here.

That is the best way that I have ever heard this described. I just about fell out of my chair about that sitting at the bar at Martin's part.

About ten years ago, I got married, was living in Belhaven and was *encouraged* to purchase a home in Madison. I did and the marriage didn't last long, and when I sold the home, after only owning it a year, I immediately came back to Belhaven, where I never wanted to leave in the first place.

I found myself spending many nights at Martins following that divorce, with the teeth still intact (Thank God), and thinking that I couldn't have been happier about how things worked out.

Ten years later, I still feel the same way and I still live in Belhaven. I also still patron Martins from time to time.

So I see why *they* are so angry. Life up there crushes the soul. I'll be sure to drink one for them next time I am at Martins.

Frank Griffin said...

Points to Ophelia. The "faded beauty" metaphor did get away from her a bit, but she is a fine writer and deserves to have our attention. As a cowboy at heart, I get my back up when someone attacks a woman, but I suspect that this woman doesn't need my help.

I've spent some time in Madison County, and there is plenty of firepower around there. Fear of "vandals" is something that travels with us wherever we go. And Rankin County? Given the right leadership, someone with military experience, those folks could take over the state in less than a week.

Anonymous said...

This is going to be a diatribe:

I hate to see what has become of Jackson. Before I moved to a different state, I lived off of Old Canton road and went to J.A. I ended up at J.A. merely because of a summer daycare program and continued. I later left and moved to Nashville.

Coming back to Mississippi in itself was a complete culture shock-one, in which, I still attain to recoup from to this day.

The government of Jackson is ineffective. There are reasons why. It’s literally falling apart at the seams; however, the first step to recovery is that you have to admit you have a problem—so they say.

Not to be outdone, is the STATE government and its ways (don’t get caught up in D’s & R’s).

Mississippi- we have a problem- and standing idly by why they propose more taxes across the board is retarded. There may cases where taxes being raised are warranted, BUT ONLY IF THE MONEY COLLECTED IS USED EFFICIENTLY- OR HEK- IF IT’S EVEN USED FOR IT’S INTENDED PURPOSE & NOT STOLEN.
We are not merely taxed enough already-as a state- we are expected stand idly by with too many hands in the cookie jar as they swindle away what you or we collectively give them.

Anonymous said...

Y'all who live in these areas need to call your supervisor. The County will go into Jackson and repair or repave streets that are in bad shape.

Anonymous said...

Stupid blog. Such haters. Lots of good done by GBF. This is another example of community at work for the good of all. Why are you promoting hatred on this blog?

Ophelia said...

I was behind a rather saftig woman in the supermarket line last week, and she was sporting a billboard-sized T-shirt that read, “THEY HATE US ‘CAUSE THEY AIN’T US!” I’ve no idea who “they” and “us” are, but boy, these would be dandy team outfits for both the Mad Madisonians and the Beleaguered Belhavenites as they continue their localist slugfest!

Dackbart Gobbert said...

Ophelia, or should I call you Miss Butts, you must have been shopping again at the Wally World up in Canton to have encountered that babe the size of a billboard. Do you, like Miss Garbo, wear a scarf and shades when you go slumming?

As to your earlier stinging remarks, I can't apologize to you for my inferior knowledge of Westover, Eastover and Leftover as folk of my status have never been allowed beyond the moat of any of them. I was not born Hispanic so you know I don't even qualify to clip the hedges in any of those places.

I, too, must run along now. There's a man out front to give me a cash-price on painting my stucco so I can distinguish my crib from the others along my lakefront. If you're ever in the area, do give us a toot.

Anonymous said...

Oh god this is funny. I think Ophelia is winning though.

Anonymous Dackbart Gobbert, III said...

I'm turning grey attempting to distinguish (but can't) among Grandview Gloria, Ophelia Butts or whoever she randomly might most lately represent.

What I find most amusing, however, is those soon to be retired (or those already octogenarians) who want the rest of the crowd to believe they enjoy the peace and tranquility of these quaint little pot-hole ridden, moated and gated areas situated in the midst of a war zone.

They want to be perceived as Saddam, living in a pleasure castle amid the ruins and rubble of the outside world, surrounded by plebes with carriages, fans and grapes, venturing out only to purchase wine, pick up asparagus at Whole Foods or drop by the area den-of-inequity to 'speak at' the portly bartender.

Truth be known, these people regularly take a spin through Madison County in the Lexus or black-windowed Tahoe - just to breathe fresh air and sense the safety, expanse, fine buildings and folks going about their business, smiling. Yet, then they return to their keyboards and gin-tonics and have another go at pretending they dislike what they saw on their visit.

And I'll bet Uncle Toot's finest deer-head that Ophelia hangs her freshly-warshed draws out to dry on a nail on the nine-foot fence just like they hang them on the bob-war fence over in Bovina. But, she will never admit it 'cause you just don't DO that in Belhaven. And she dispatches the Filipino help to collect her draws before the gardener gets there and sees them.

Anonymous said...

No matter the spin, another 6 mils of proptery taxation doesn't and won't increase Belhaven property values.

Anonymous said...

9:14 - I didn't realize a neighborhood hired security guards in order to increase property values. That's actually a real odd notion.

Anonymous said...

I sure hope these belhaven residents won't have to drop any memberships to river hills tennis facility or CCJ. God forbid they can't pay for there 3 kids to attend JP,JA or Saint Andrews in most belhaven cases. Some might have to resort to cutting own grass or hedges. The horror of think8ng they might actually have to rent out there beach house or Oxford condo for several weeks a year. It's sad and very tragic.

Anonymous said...

The zip code warriors have brought out the big guns, the poet laureates, to continue this never ending war.

Thanks for so much joy this morning! Now, if we could only get you all on the same page for the good of our state.

Anonymous said...

We must be doing something right in my neighborhood if this many people have dropped by to opine on whether or not we should form a CID.

We're way more important than I thought we were.

Anonymous said...

The GI doctor who will remain nameless bc there are a few of them in belhaven has done an amazing job in organizing the neighborhood while Casey also does some decent things as well after his leadership behind the scenes.

Anonymous said...

The GI Doctor? You mean the one whose practice and large group have abandoned Jacktown for Flowood and Madison? Yes...both of them.

But, again, please tell me why the neighborhood feels the need to place a tax on the people in order to hire security. Doesn't the city of Jackso.....never mind.

The fact that we have competent LEO in Madison is the reason we can spend our disposable income on tennis skirts and crumpets every day. (Well they said you was high-class, well that was just a lie)...with apologies to EP.

Ophelia said...

Frank Griffin, thank you kindly. As always, you have the key.

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).

Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.

In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS