Tuesday, April 19, 2022

Yogi Come Home (FOUND!)

 Update (4/20, 11:55 AM): Yogi was found on Hwy 43 near Goodman Road at 3 AM.

The Pelahatchie Police Department issued the following press release. 

24 comments:

Squirrel Loose In Church said...

Huckleberry Hound and Smokey Bear are pissed and you damn sure don't want them on your case. So, boys, go ahead and throw the rest of that case of Shaefer Light out and set Yogi on the roadside afore you get in more shit than you can handle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCfBqBJTQ24

Raw Boo Boo said...

Out in the elements for 50 years with a steel post stuck up his ass, has anyone considered maybe he just finally got fed up all those years with NO pic-a-nic basket and he just decided to walk off, maybe to Puckett?

Perhaps bored and striking out catalytic converter thieves freed him and gave him a reason to change his "preferred pronouns"?

Maybe he'll show up near the front door of a vacant and dilapidated Shoneys?

Anonymous said...

Where does one fence a Yogi Bear anyway?

Anonymous said...

Pretty worthless security camera.

Anonymous said...

Yogi went to a picka nick with Boo Boo.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like the perfect plot for a new episode of Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law.
I miss the days when Steven Colbert was funny instead of a leftist shill.

Anonymous said...

Yogi and the Shoney's Big Boy are sitting down enjoying a Pic-A-Nic basket and hot fudge Sunday right about now....

Anonymous said...

Smarter than the average bear ? Film at 8 .

Anonymous said...

Likely propped up in a rural yard, taking incoming rounds.

Anonymous said...

"Someone could have observed a lot, just by watching".

Anonymous said...

Y'all stop fretting over this, Ranger Smith will find him like he always did.

Anonymous said...

We are cracking jokes as we should but I do hope they find this methed out jerk and coat him in bear spray.

Anonymous said...

Recommend checking frat houses in the region, starting with Delta House. But, this investigation will be no picnic.

Anonymous said...

Maybe it was Snidely Whiplash. Will they call Dudley Do-Right for help?

Anonymous said...

Three minutes to steal a bear? He must have been put up with bubble gum.

Anonymous said...

Has anyone considered Boo Boo in this crime. No secret that he fell into various addictions after Yogi decided to be a statue on the road. Boo Boo never got over this.....

Anonymous said...

Let's look at this in a "positive" manner.

Something different from the stories about the daily sh*t show about the city government of jackson (No it doesn't rate a capitol letter J).

Also there no headlines about the body count in jackson.....

I call that a win!

Anonymous said...

Yogi has turned up but no one is saying where or who kidnapped him. Teenage son of a local elected ? Community needs to know who the jerk is !

Anonymous said...

Is Dean Wurmer cooperating in the investigation into possible fraternity involvement in the theft? If he's not cooperating then he's part of the 'fat drunk and stupid going through life' problem!

Anonymous said...

IDK, Yogi looks pretty stiff, like he has a rod up his butt or something.

Anonymous said...

" Is Dean Wurmer cooperating in the investigation into possible fraternity involvement in the theft? "

That was funny.

Back in the 80s,one Ole Miss frat stole the Big Boy statue from the Oxford Shoney's. Another frat stole it from the first frat. A third
frat stole the "Big Boy", from the second frat.

The fiberglass hamburger was then sawed in half and used as perfect
tubs for icing down two kegs.

(An interesting conversation piece that remained in use for many years).



Kingfish said...

Didn't the high school kids have a dance or prom that night?

Anonymous said...

It probably has more scrap value than a catalytic converter

Anonymous said...

Mississippi Southern has an available football scholarship.


Recent Comments

Search Jackson Jambalaya

Subscribe to JJ's Youtube channel

Archives

Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
.