Warning: Graphic language, partial nudity, drugs
So you got a Lynch Street Profit Gang franchise. Set up at the corner of Plantation and Concorde. You hit the jackpot. Customers 24/7, profits, new ride, all the toys. Even the Homeboy Shopping Network is calling you. The LSPG has a special perk just for you. If you achieve the level of a Crunk Star Producer, you get to be a play with the Lynch Street Profit Gang. What does that mean? Why, it means you get to hang with them and be like this:
What other franchise offers this kind of life? The Lynch Street Profit Gang. Coming soon to a street corner near you.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Be a playa with the Lynch Street Profit Gang
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- Time to return fire on Banks
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- Throwdown at the Levee Board
- Door shuts on another life
- Truth begins to come out in Irby case
- Judge orders interview of Irby
- Steadivest: Snakes or snake-bitten?
- Post-election thoughts
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- Incest in Dixie: Mississippi Legal Profession
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- A Black Governor in Mississippi?
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
36 comments:
As I watch this fine example of the Jackson, MS African-American youths, who have been afforded the benefits of the Civil Rights movement, I can't help but wonder if this activity is what Martin Luther King had in mind for the generations who preceded the struggle.
Society's finest right there! And aren't they so very proud of themselves! Dr. Martin Luther King is probably turning over right now so he doesn't have to watch.
Disgusting.
As a parent of a daughter, I am appalled. Then again, I am sure all of their parents are VERY proud of them, specifically the ones of the half-naked girl on the floor.
The lead rapper AKA Loud Pack just how old is that kid?
Which corner of Concorde and Plantation? Are you saying that one of the homeowners on one of those corners is involved with the Lynch Street Profit Gang?
I hope it is not so since I live a few blocks from that location and we tend to enjoy a quiet and peaceful life in this area. We never hear any disturbances like those depicted on that video.
God forbid someone would bring that trash here.
I want a shirt.
Well said 7:58
Can we PLEASE have a Save Jackson from Crime ACTION LIST open thread!?!
Pretty please?
Where in the video does it imply this is at Plantation/Concord? I live close to that area and travel Plantation to get to my street and never see anything like this.
WOW! It is nice to see that the Jackson black youth or so gifted in the art of sign language. I am waiting for Madison's Hoy Road Posse or Rankin's Flo Wood Profit Robbers to come out with their raunchy response. Yea, let's get CRUNK!
Jackson you asked for it, now sit back and enjoy! Your city is burning!!!
Will everyone just leave these fine young citizens alone? I mean, come on! Their ancestors were slaves. They have struggled their entire lives to survive under the power of the WHITE MAN. What do you expect them to do? Get a job? Um, NO! With raw talent like this you MUST represent!
It's hard bein a thug...
They better be more subtle otherwise the occupy movement will target their enterprise as being too productive.
This sure makes me glad that you, Curt and DowntownBen are worried about the clubs on Capitol Street. Now I can rest assured that once they are gone, Jackson will be just fine.
Sure! This is evidence that those Capitol Street clubs are tame when put beside what exists elsewhere in jackson. But we can be happy - once Farrish Street opens with all its bars and clubs, we will have plenty of places for these hoods to hang out all close together.
No difference between this and the crap on MTV, BET and all the rest. Absolutely unfortunately no difference.
I feel cheated living in plain old vanilla Madison where the most compelling issue facing city government is whether the couple in Trace Village will be able to keep their blue Christmas peacocks on the roof. You all in Jackson are lucky to have such culture and rich diversity in your city. Where is this neighborhood pub? My wife and I might want to head uptown one of these nights for a drink and some local music...
They better be more subtle otherwise the occupy movement will target their enterprise as being too productive.
Can Cricket shake her booty like that? My guess is that they'd get alot more sympathetic press coverage in Smith Park if she could.
I just rode by the Plantation/Concord area. Only structures there are houses. If this was a party inside a garage, someone needs to report it to JPD, because there were underage youth drinking and who knows what else. One of the young ladies looked so messed up they were taking her clothes off.
I guess this post, its predecessor and the accompanying comments are fulfilling the jackassery you promise. Sometimes you want to be taken seriously, sometimes you undermine yourself with dumb shit like this.
Sometimes you want to be taken seriously, sometimes you undermine yourself with dumb shit like this.
Yet you are still here reading.
7:45; don't Bogart that joint!
Shadow, apparently you are not deep enough in the bottle, that actually was on target.
Awesome! Just reinforced every stereotype I have ever had, even some I had forgotten about. Really impressed with the high quality bitches/ho's. I miss Jackson!
A triple elimination steel cage match between the Lynch Street Profit Gang, The Hoy Road Posse,
and the previously unknown Howard Avenue Biloxi VietCong, would be entertaining
Some observations about this video:
Those big ole buds/blunts were left over "props" from last month's Canton apartment gang video.
I thought wearing caps sideways was no longer a fad in the East & West Coast thug "kul'cha".-Forgive me,
we are dealing w/country thugs from Mississippi.
The skank wallowing around in the unknown floor liquid is an aromatic health hazard, (Stainky Skank)
In an earlier video someone was making circles with tire rubber all up and down the street.
The car can be easily identified as can some of the players in the video.
This should be brought to the attention of JPD or someone who can arrest these thugs and make them clean up the asphalt on hands and knees, if necessary.
They are intentionally defacing public (tax payers) property.
CLEAN up the mess you've made!
defacing public property is no doubt the least of their transgressions.
8:36, that is quite true, but at least it is a start. It would probably be the only work they've ever done.
There is no way to prove that stuff they were smoking and handling was pot.
Disturbing the peace, using the nig word and other vulgar acts were all caught on tape and could be used against them if it took place in public.
They are a disgrace to the Black race. I have no doubt that many in the black community wish they didn't exist.
I wish the diseases these punks probably have would soon help them make a FINAL EXIT.
They are making and squirting out babies constantly.
Circular insanity...
If we could pass out weapons, they'd probably eliminate themselves in short order...surely this isn't typical of youth.
The rear end on that girl made me want to throw up.they all act like animals.I say build a fence around Jackson an contain them.I'm ashamed to even say I live around Jackson.what a joke.
Well, there is one less. Terry Road Tank was one of the three that were shot last weekend and he died.
Ah...the convenient memory loss that comes with age...
Depending on one's decade, there were hoodlums, bikers,beatniks, hippies...rock n roll was the devil's music...panty raids...drunk girls jumped up on tables and stripped at more than one frat party...I know some now upstanding successful people in this State who were vandals and thieves and did drugs who have apparently forgotten their wild days.The rocker wannabee's of times past are mostly staid professionals in the real life and the former hoods may still have Harleys but aren't in Hell's Angels.
Some of these kids will straighten up and some won't. That's human history. And, the poorer they are to start and the worse their parenting, the less chance they will have to find the life skills they need.
Snoop Dog went from thug to CEO and philanthropist.
Unless you want to always be judged by the mistakes of YOUR youth, loosen up people. FEW of us have good sense until our late 20s and some not until later than that and some NEVER.
9:57--
Well said. I remember my mother being horrified by my Alice Cooper albums, and hanging around Riverside Park.
You don't want to party in their hood? Then DON'T.
9:57, you suggested that folks need to lighten up on this creeps.
I suggest you tighten up your loose wires.
These thugs and their activities in no way compare to the "mistakes" of the youth back then.
Sure, gangs occasionally had rumbles where rival gangs exchanged blows in fistfights, but we didn't see kids riding around shooting, stabbing and killing or wounding their foes on a daily basis.
These thugs just as soon kill you as look at you.
They think nothing of having sex and producing babies who will continue this cycle. It's a badge of honor to these baby daddies and their baby mamas.
They don't hesitate to explain how they view others in their rap songs. They rap from experience.
You said "Ah...the convenient memory loss that comes with age..."
Well, I say that your memory loss isn't so much a convenience as it is a condition that comes with old age.
I'm willing to bet that you wouldn't dare approach these thugs when they are having their festivities-- or even when they are not. They likely hate you for whatever reason. They are not afraid of you, but I'll bet you would be afraid of them face to face.
You've given your opinion and I've given mine. I feel most people of any race would agree with my POV and not yours.
FEW of us have good sense until our late 20s and some not until later than that and some NEVER.
Please let us know when you acquire yours.
ahhhhhhhhhhhh yes! How sweet it is...a jury of my peers! NOT!
Rapper David banner in his homecoming video to his childhood home on flag chapel, says that it used to be nice there when "Ole Whitey" flourished Jackson but after the Whiteflight, the city let the homes and surroundings go down because it was majority blacks. Ain't that's some crap? No it wasn't the city's fault, its the communities fault which happens to be democrat, so there you go. Btw, me and my family were the last whites to escape the ghetto over there in Georgetown, Huron street 1989. I will never look back. Roll on Rankin county!!
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