Friday, February 1, 2019

Blackberry Comes Back

Given up for dead, Blackberry is back with the Keytwo, powered by Android.  If you are like me and can't stand typing on glass, there is hope for you.

Blackberry licensed smartphone production to TCL.  The Keytwo uses Oreo.  Thus if you  own a Samsung Galaxy, you can pick up a Keytwo and start using it with almost no learning curve.  The keyboard provides useful shortcuts.  It can be set up to open your favorite apps. For example, a short press of the "T" key opens Twitter, "I" for Instagram, and so on on my phone.  You can also set up the keys for speed dialing your favorite phone numbers as well.

What is the best feature? The battery.  It is a beast.  A full charge can last almost two day  as your charger will no longer resemble a leash.  RAM is 6 GB and internal memory is 64 GB.   The phone is available in black or silver.  It works well with Airpods and your car's Bluetooth system.  It can handle up to a 256 GB sd card.  It also has a fingerprint sensor on the Spacebar for security.

It is factory unlocked and must be purchased through Amazon or  Best Buy.

A cheaper, lower-spec'd Light Edition is available as well in various colors: Atomic Red, Black, and Champagne.  It has 4 GB of RAM and 64 GB of internal memory although it lacks the Keytwo's capacitive keyboard.   It is $449 although it has been on sale at times for $399.

Keytwo LE

If you want to go a little cheaper, the Blackberry Keyone Black edition is still available at Amazon for $399.  It has 4 GB RAM and 64 GB memory but has an older processor although it's pretty damn fast.  It updated to Oreo last summer.   JJ recommends the Seidio Surface case.


Stop trying to make "fetch" happen said...

Enough. About. The. Blackberry.

Anonymous said...

When I write the unauthorized, unfiltered, unabridged story of your life

Kingfish: The Unlikely Story of the Best Amateur Reporter Who Ever Lived

there will definitely be chapters devoted to your love of dogs, hottest reporter poll, and of course the damn Blackberry obsession.

Anonymous said...

I dig it. Do you know if compatible with CSpire network?

Anonymous said...

I always did like blackberry phones. It is unfortunate that they grew so stagnant like so many giants that withered away to a shell of their former glory. Sort of like the trolls and censorship of racial reality is going to kill this site eventually.

People can get leftist spin anywhere.

Brent said...

I'm with you Kingfish. I still have mine and use it everyday!!

Anonymous said...

Does it out preform Apple? Looks good.

Anonymous said...

what doesn't out perform (or preform) apple?

Anonymous said...

When my Palm was new the battery would last a week to 10 days on a single charge.

Anonymous said...

I hated the day that I had to leave Blackberry. The company did add a touch screen, but then abandoned everything that made it good - raised keyboard, ability to easily position the curser where you desired... and attempted to copy iPhone.

Anonymous said...

Does anybody remember the modem cradle you could snap your Palm into to check your email? You had to connect to a phone line - but if you had that you were BALLER!

Kingfish said...

These aren't the Storms. Great phones. I use the Keyone Black Edition. Does everything I need but I'm not a gamer. Get everything I need from Google Play Store. The keyboards will remind you of the Bolds. Come on back.

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).

Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.

In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS