Wednesday, February 13, 2019

CL: Waller is In!!!

Retired Mississippi Supreme Court Chief Justice Bill Waller, Jr. will apparently run for Governor in the Republican primary.  Geoff Pender reported in the Clarion-Ledger today:


Retired longtime state Supreme Court Chief Justice Bill Waller Jr., son of a former governor, is planning a gubernatorial run this year as a Republican, sources involved in his planning confirmed.

One of Waller's main campaign themes is expected to be that he is the only Republican candidate who can beat Democratic Attorney General Jim Hood — who remains very popular in an otherwise deep red state — in the race for governor.... Rest of article.

The question is whether the Lieutenant Governor already sucked the money out of the room?  Mr. Waller can probably get that first million or so from those who dislike Mr. Reeves but.... where does he get his second million from?

105 comments:

Anonymous said...

Whoo hoo!!! Good news for MS!

Anonymous said...

Tater just wilted.

Anonymous said...

It seems that the Republican "powers that be" heard the large Mississippi majority that said "I ain't votin' for Tater no matter what."

It kind of makes you wonder exactly who brought all the blackface pictures to everyone's attention.

Anonymous said...

Hell yeah! Someone to vote for beside Tater-tot and Hoodwink!

Anonymous said...

My guess is Marion County for money.

Anonymous said...

"Many political observers believe Waller's entrance into the GOP primary might prompt Republican state Sen. Chris McDaniel, a favorite of tea party conservatives, to enter what's becoming a crowded primary."

Don't even think about mucking this up you Pine Belt Hillbilly!

Anonymous said...

Tate's gonna need every penny of that war chest to fight this war on two fronts. I'm not betting on him.

Anonymous said...

I’ve never voted Democrat in my life. I thought I was going to this time around if Reeves was my only choice. I guess I can vote Waller now!

Anonymous said...

NEVER TATER or HOOD!!!!

Thank God we now have a choice. I know Waller is part of the good ole boy network, but he's got to be better than Tater.

Anonymous said...

Excellent news! Tate made too any enemies on his ascent to power. In politics, you have to be really smart, or really likable - Tate is neither one of those...

Anonymous said...

Wonderful. Just wonderful. Please allow me to introduce Governor Hood....

Anonymous said...

Waller will get the money. Thank God he is running!

Anonymous said...

It seems he may be a day late and a dollar (or 7,000,000) short.

Anonymous said...

Waller wins in a blowout in both the primary and general. He gets my vote.

Jeff Rimes said...

Justice Waller is the kind of man you want in politics. He loves our state and knows it as well as any man alive. Mississippi is fortunate he is running.

Anonymous said...

Wasn't Hillary the only Democrat that could win in 2016?

Sorry but Tate is a known commodity where as Waller is an insider's candidate. Tate will toast him on name recognition alone.

Anonymous said...

Very level headed choice. I've known him for 40 years and he will be a steady choice for our state.

Anonymous said...

Hallelujah! I had planned to vote and support for Hood because he was a better choice than Reeves. Now, Waller has my vote and support.

After this game changer, Reeves will have more time to spend at the Millsaps KA house to plan future Old South weekends with his frat brothers.

Anonymous said...

2:00 Agreed!

Anonymous said...

Tater supporters: "Hood can't win." Majority of Reps: "Yes, he can." As a result, Waller's all in and with supporters who were afraid to speak up about their reservations and dislike of Mr Potato Head.

Game on.....

Anonymous said...

3,2,1... here comes Teet's online troll response team after they reconfigure their attack from Hood to Waller. Get ready for the FronStrat blitzkrieg. If they can get CHS elected, then they do almost anything!

Anonymous said...

@1:53– that was fast, Tater. Thanks for showing up. Your money won’t buy the Governor ‘s mansion.

Anonymous said...

Tate Reeves may be able to raise a lot of money, but I just do not think people will vote for him (personally, I prefer my governors to look older than 13, and be able to pay for their own drive ways). Eventually, the fact that Jim Hood has essentially been absent, will catch up to him. I can't wait to vote for Waller

Anonymous said...

He's running as a Republican?!?!? HA! A "Republican" in the mold of Bill Crawford, I presume? What's his position on the flag (as I clutch my handkerchief)?

Anonymous said...

Chris McDaniel needs to go away.

Rod Knox said...

I'm amazed that a man who drove a 4 speed Rambler to MSU would ever see the possibility of making the Governeor's mansion his home. But maybe these days he drives a Prius. Or does he allow himself to be driven wherever he goes?

Anonymous said...

1:53 is exactly right. Waller is a day late and a dollar short. But Waller just leveled the playing field for Hood. Waller will force Tate to spend a very sizeable chunk of his war chest. Half? Maybe more? Tate’s chickens just came home to roost and Hood will be the beneficiary.

Anonymous said...

I was going to hold my nose and vote for Reeves.....not now !

Anonymous said...

@2:09

Do you know what Trump's chances of being the Republican nominee were base on his being an unknown "commodity" running against all the known "commodities" ?
FWIW I believe he was number 16 out of 16 candidates per the odds makers. Nice try though Tater Tot.

Anonymous said...

Chief Waller would be an excellent Governor Waller. He is a man of faith, always tries to do what's right, and already knows his way around the capitol.

Anonymous said...

Reeves probably already has every single decision where Waller voted to reverse a rape or murder opinion. Judges make horrible politicians.

Anonymous said...

Without a doubt the best man in the race. I worked with Bill, when
we were young, on his dad's campaign. He's honest, smart, and loves
this state. You will find it hard to hear anyone say an unkind word
about him.

John C.
Brandon MS

Anonymous said...

This is the BEST news our state could have! Republicans, Democrats and Independents should be overjoyed we have a good, honest, qualified candidate to vote for!

Anonymous said...

Waller is a has been/never was....his dad was a democrat....he is trying to fulfill some type of "legacy"...….he should go home....it will cost tate millions

Anonymous said...

It's a good look for the state of Mississippi. A party has provided a ballot that voters won't have to hold their noses when they vote. If only the same thing could happen on the national level.

Anonymous said...

I'm going to give a contribution. We need a honest, smart, moral man at the top.

Anonymous said...

I served with Waller in the National Guard. He would make an excellent Governor. He has my vote. I am not a Tate fan. Glad to have an excellent choice.

Theca Jones said...

Tate is gonna cry and the tears will run down his rosey red cheeks

Anonymous said...

Great job, Josh - giving your boy Geoff his talking points. Now you finally have someone else to give you a chance for FrontStrat to play in that race. Now you won't have to depend solely on Dilbert to keep you rolling in government candy, if you can just figure out a way for Waller to overcome Tate's head start.

Like Waller, think he is a good guy. But he is going to find that primary elections are totally different deals than his judicial races. But hey - he got elected to the Supreme Court with his only justification was a short term as a Jackson Municipal Judge and having his daddy's name. Maybe that will give him enough to scratch the surface a little more than Foster will do.

Anonymous said...

Hot Damn! If the people in Mississippi have any sense they will elect Bill Waller for Governor in a landslide. So to me, this is litmus test to see how smart the average person is in this State.

Anonymous said...

Tater could take the high road and and cruise, but he won't he's going to throw dirt on all of them. By the time he gets to the general election he will have pissed off even more people. Like most elections it's going to be about who doesn't vote. Hoods people are going to come out.

Anonymous said...

Thank Almighty God that Bill Waller is willing to do this for Mississippi. He and Charlotte have SO MANY BETTER THINGS TO DO at this point in their lives than enter the nightmare that is modern campaigning. He is retired. They are financially secure. Bill could just show up at Butler Snow one day a week and pick up his check.... This is very good news. It actually makes me hopeful for our state for the first time in a long while.

Anonymous said...

I don't really think Waller will need to raise much money to defeat Reeves. Reeves is terribly unpopular. However, this announcement will cause lots of sphincters to tighten up...those who thought they could ride Tate's coat-tails into eight years of employment. Sorry about that.

McDaniel will not enter the fray and it's curious that anybody would suggest this announcement would cause THAT. Makes no sense.

I don't know much about Waller, but from all I know and read and hear about Tate and Hood.....I am certain to vote for Waller.

Anonymous said...

Name Recognition? Really? When it comes to the common man and woman of both races entering the voting booth, the name WALLER is more recognized than the name REEVES.

The only voters who recognize the name Reeves are those in government and the readers of this blog.

Anonymous said...

Tater tot is small potatoes. Waller is a shoo in.

Anonymous said...

FrontStrat is doing just fine peddling influence on statewide energy contracts. running a campaign is small potatoes (no pun intended) compared to their behind the scenes arm twisting for contracts

Anonymous said...

I have always voted Republican; I can't vote for Tate like I have in the past; I was thinking about voting for Hood; I know now I will be voting for the Chief Justice!!!

Anonymous said...

Outstanding.

Anonymous said...

This just got a lot more fun to watch. Waller is the real deal, and he will resonate with all Mississippians. In a choice of Waller or Hood, Mississippi wins either way.

Anonymous said...

Don't know Waller but know a little bit about Tate. Will vote Waller and so will the family.

Anonymous said...

A general election between Waller and Hood will be a giant step forward for this state. Tate Reeves has accomplished nothing in all of his years on the state payroll and the unconstitutional bills he has helped to pass have cost the taxpayers many millions in legal fees. This may finally be an election where we make some real progress.

Anonymous said...

Bill Jr. is as good as they come. Doubt you’re gonna find a speck of dirt and he wore the uniform for a lot of years, unlike the competition, he’s actually done something. Mississippi is more politically complex than most people know. Look out Tate, an adult is coming into the fray here.

Anonymous said...


Internecine GOP war. You'd think they would have learned something after the debacle in 2014.

The oven overheated said...

Now the Tater tots burned

Anonymous said...

Yes...there is a God!

Anonymous said...

I'm running to find high school & college year books on all the candidates.
Wee, this is like an Easter Egg hunt.

Anonymous said...

Old Money Jackson vs New Money Rankin

The old group will come through for Waller. It may be a massacre. No wonder Tate was making legislators sign pledge cards over free tortilla chips.

Anonymous said...

7:22 and Virginia, there is a Santa Claus too!

Anonymous said...

Thank goodness. He has my vote.

Anonymous said...

THANK YOU, Mr. Chief Justice and Mrs. Waller. I KNEW Mississippi could do better than Mr. Hood or Mr. Reeves. I was seriously thinking of staying home and not voting in the Gubernatorial race. The last Democrat for whom I voted was Kane Ditto, and that was a mistake, on the other hand, I simply could not vote for Hood OR Reeves.

The people of this State will be in debt to Chief Justice and Mrs. Waller for subjecting themselves to a campaign and, hopefully, to eight years in the Governor's Mansion.

Thank you Wallers. Will send as much as I can.

Anonymous said...

Governor Waller, Lt. Governor Hoseman. Excellent leadership for Mississippi. Perhaps the best opportunity ever to move up from last. May God bless our future.

Anonymous said...

Great man. Look out DPS. NO MORE of your garbage and criminal acts your admin pulls. Poor Marshall are you scrambling to find someone in this campaign as well. Good luck my old friend.

Anonymous said...

Small sample size, but pretty resounding endorsement from readers of this blog.
I know both. Waller is trustworthy and selfless - two traits not held by Reeves.

Unknown said...

You are all crying that Waller is solving the dilemma of choosing between Hood and Reeves when you already had a great alternative ... Robert Foster! You didn't want to hear him or give him a chance but you are goo-goo eyes over somebody that's been in politics for years bc of his last name. Pity.

Anonymous said...

This news is great to hear! Now we have a real republican candidate to get behind. Buh bye Tate. You will learn a hard life lesson for how you have treated people these years your immature power hungry self was in charge. I predict Tate will get a few votes (Parks, Hipp, his family, and the lobbyists who have contributed $7 million to buy him). The rest of Mississippi will back Waller.

Captain William said...


THANK YOU JESUS and JUDGE WALLER!!!

I was sick about our prior choice of a crook vs. and idiot for Governor. I have known Bill Waller, Jr. for a long time and he is a smart, honest, and ethical man. I don't know why he would put himself in the upcoming election mud-fest, but I appreciate him offering Mississippi a good choice!!

Anonymous said...

As long as brother Bob is kept on a short leash.

Anonymous said...

Does anyone know how to get an application for a bank teller job at the Trustmark in Florence for someone who has lots of fat cat experience including riding Haley Barbour’s fat cat coattails, state treasurer, and dictator of the senate? I’m asking for a friend. Your Tater Tot is toasted.

Anonymous said...

Going to bed with the “Hallelujah Chorus” playing in my head... PTL!!

Anonymous said...

Hope he defeats Tater Tot

Anonymous said...

Is this Fake News or a Joke? Either way it’s funny. His political claim to fame is bullying his way out of budget cuts with a pen when almost every state employee was furloughed and every other state agencies budget was cut but the bottled water and coffee services continued on for those in the MSSC.

Anonymous said...

At the end of the day, it all boils down to integrity. Think. Then vote.

Anonymous said...

@ February 13, 2019 at 4:08 PM

"Waller is a has been/never was....his dad was a democrat....he is trying to fulfill some type of "legacy"...….he should go home....it will cost tate millions"

Makes you wonder why he switched to the Republican Party? Couldn't be because that's what a majority of Dixiecrats did in the early 80's? That's too much like right, right?

420 said...

All of these comments on here about my dear friend Josh and Frontier are ridiculous. Josh is a capatalist just like my dear friend Tate. I’m the person who can bring all the sides together to make sure the GOP stays in power for years to come. I’m goode at lurking in the shadows, being friends with every side and bringing them together when needed.

Anonymous said...

McDaniel, Foster, Tater and Waller, this is the opportunity McD can't pass on. Tater will get knocked out in the first round and McD easily beats Foster or Waller in the runoff.

Anonymous said...

Now that Reeves has some real competition, maybe Teachers will finally get a real raise. What they are offering now amounts to less than $.65 an hour.

Anonymous said...

Tate...you'll just have to wait; but like Hillary you may have reached your plateau. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

"Reeves probably already has every single decision where Waller voted to reverse a rape or murder opinion. Judges make horrible politicians." 3:44 PM

Sorry 3:44, but most of these type of decisions will be down in the Court of Appeals and not in the high court. Not all of them, but most will be. Not as much dirt there as you might think.

Anonymous said...

Some points:

1. What makes Waller think he has a real chance? There has been "speculation" of his run for some time, but he had to know that Tater does have some pretty strong R support, as does the ol' Hood-winker as a D. A recent poll found his name recognition around 10%, substantially lower than either Reeves or Hood. Yes, he can do lots of things to increase his recognition and profile, but his main resume is that of a MSSC justice, not something the average citizen of Mississippi connects with much in their life. Yes, a case (pardon the pun) could be made for him, but it could be made against him, too.

2. This could turn into a real circular firing squad IF Waller does really want to be Guv. Granted, Tater and Hoodwinker will do most of the initial shooting at each other, but both will have to think very carefully about how the deal with Waller. Hood will be faced with the choice of really going after not only Reeves, but all MSGOP candidates, or letting the undercard alone to split the vote so that whoever his opponent is comes out of the primary a weaker candidate. And that same situation also faces Reeves and Waller. Assuming Waller really is in it to win it, he and Reeves in a primary knife fight hurts both and helps Hood, but if Waller doesn't slug it out with Reeves, he stands little chance of doing anything more than be a spoiler, which brings up:

3. Assuming for the moment that Waller really is in to win, some back-of-the-envelope election math looks ominous: with Waller in, at this point, Hood is going to get at least 35% because he has (D) after his name, Reeves is going to get about the same because he has (R) after his name AND some level of personal support. Assuming it had been Reeves v Hood from the gate to the post, it was going to be a close, close race, with each having around 35-40% because of party, each getting around 5-7% because of personal support, and the remaining 10-15% up for grabs.

I'd say that what Waller's 10% name recognition really means is reflected fairly accurately by the comments here: the vast majority of those who currently recognize his name will likely support and vote for him, primary and general, and here's the key part, his and their party affiliation doesn't matter. Waller's current supporters are HIS supporters without regard to a letter after his name.

So with Waller already pulling votes from Reeves and Hood and with many of those currently supporting him being of the "neither of the above"/"hold my nose and vote" types with regard to Reeves and Hood, that positions Waller to be "better alternative to bad choices" guy. That will work for a fair number of votes, but it will make for a bloody MSGOP primary if Reeves decides to go the mattresses. Such a primary will be a huge help to Hood and the Dems, but it could also backfire a bit with moderate white Dems and independents who think Hood is a redneck white Dem and are shown by the MSGOP primary that Waller is the moderate adult in the room, regardless of the R after his name.

So, what does all that stuff above boil down to suggest? Even if all three of them act at all times like reasonable, sensible adults (about as likely as each riding around the state on unicorns) with a sincere desire to put the real needs of Mississippi's citizenry first, none of the three has a clear path to the office. But since we all know that at least two of them will not act like reasonable, sensible adults even most of the time, and their base-level sincere desire is to help themselves and their "friends" first and foremost, this is shaping up to be debacle. There are a couple of near-certainties: the next of Governor of Mississippi is going to be a very battle-scarred white guy, with the majority of the population and at least 48% of the voters very unhappy about who it is.

Anonymous said...

hey @6:37 - what kind of drugs are you on? Or, is that you Chris?

Anonymous said...

The trolls are ruining JJ.

Rod Knox said...

Does all this conflict in the GOP indicate that Hood is actually a formidable candidate in the eyes of the Republicans in charge?

Anonymous said...

Internecine GOP war. You'd think they would have learned something after the debacle in 2014.

Except this time, different than '14, its the Barbour Klan vs the Rankin County GOP machine. Don't listen to Sam Hall stupidly saying this is traditional GOP vs Tea Party. It isn't. Now, if McD wants to screw over the Barbours for '14, he should definitely get in.

Anonymous said...

... none of the three has a clear path to the office.

Damn you're windy. Your ONLY salient point.

Anonymous said...

BUT what about those Hollywood liberals and East Coast Democrats who are trying to run THIS GREAT STATE?!

I Say All That To Say This - said...

Is that you again, Sid, @ 8:07. Nobody else on the planet 'talks' like you do. And nobody else rambles so mightily yet winds up saying nothing. Well....other than Lumumba.

Anonymous said...

Now, please get rid of Hosemann. PLEASE

Anonymous said...

Amen 9:23. And Hood can sit back and watch the R fight as Tate eats into his war chest of fools (those that contributed to him) gold. A political contest like this one will likely never repeat itself in MS.

Smackdown 2019!

Anonymous said...

Tate Reeves was a field director for Bill
Waller when he ran for the Court.

Anonymous said...

Hood will have to take positions on issues he's avoided as AG. No doubt he's watching today as the left of his base is burning Jay Hughes at the stake.

Anonymous said...

February 14, 2019 at 8:59 AM wrote:

"... none of the three has a clear path to the office.

Damn you're windy. Your ONLY salient point."

8:07am again, and yeah, it was a bit longer than I realized or intended. But "no clear path" is not the half of it:

Amos and Andy (see what I did there...), or should I say Taterina and Jimmy Sue, have been snapping each other's bra straps and swinging their purses at each other for years in anticipation of this year's big catfight and minstrel show. Meanwhile, all the fellas at the dance have been getting all likkered up trying to put on enough beer googles to make one of these coyote ugly broads look at least good enough to take home. And then, in walks Kate Upton wearing nothing but a thong and a smile. She loudly announces she is all hot, bothered and looking to hook up with some nice guy...so someone will take care of her so she can quit street-hooking...and have someone to help her take care of her 12 children by 11 other men (and she actually knows who 3 or 4 of them are!).

There isn't a clear path, much less a good one, to be found, but every path available has some pretty significant risk and downside.

PS - not trying to be sexist here - if you are a gal (or a guy) who prefers men, substitute whomever you wish in the appropriate roles.

Anonymous said...

I am surprised at the comments here... the people who read this blog tend to know a thing or two about politics. But most are leaning to emotion over brain here.

Bill Waller has to raise funds, and spend it, to get his name recognition up in FIVE months.

There's a small rolodex of people you can call to get money. Those people (and PACS) have already made contributions to Reeves.


Believe it or not, the Waller name is not known (unless you remember his father, and in that case, I commend you on being 85 years old and using the internet).


Waller should have made this decisions months ago to shore up donors and ground operatives. Majority of both have been committed. I really like Waller and his family, but this is simply too late in the game.


And trust me: Northeast Jackson neighborhood support does not win you a Republican Primary.

Anonymous said...

I like Bill and think he is probably the candidate most likely to beat Hood. But he screwed this up by waiting too late. Tate has $7 million to spend in a primary. Bill will be lucky to raise 25% of that (and money buys the Big O's: Outreach and Organization). If he was going to run, he should have announced last fall. He's cost himself this race by waiting too long.

Anonymous said...

11:01, the problem is, the entire state is tired of Mississippi being run from of Rankin county. This is the first credible candidate to dare run against Tate and many many people are breathing a sigh of relief that he is. It won't be just NE Jackson money, and plenty of PACs give to multiple candidates.

Anonymous said...

Just tossing this out there, but Reeves has $7 mil of other people's money, and Waller will likely raise at least a couple of mil, maybe more. They could have a "kid gloves" primary where neither really spends money or fights, but it makes Hood spend at least some of his fund and be forced to speak in public (which is always dangerous for MS pols), with the agreement that whomever looks to be the best man to beat Hood accepts the nomination and the other retires with a nice nest-egg booster (the basically intact campaign fund), tossing some into the general election fund for the other.

Think about this: at least two of the candidates will spend over $10 million combined (granted, it was once other people's money) attempting to win the governorship of Mississippi, a job with a salary of less than $200 grand a year, max total salary of about $1 million if re-elected, and all the prestige of, well, being the governor of Mississippi - 99+% of even Mississippians would rather see Katy Perry for a fleeting moment than have dinner with the governor of Mississippi. Yeah, I know, they just "want to help the people of Mississippi..." Uh-huh, and I have a nice oceanfront unicorn ranch in Oxford, all of which can be planted in magic soybeans and fertilized with magic pixie dust, that I'll sell you for a mere $250K an acre. Unicorns, magic soybeans and pixie dust all extra, of course.

Anonymous said...

Just a note on Waller's timing - Waller just retired from the Mississippi Supreme Court on January 31st. I assume that he didn't want to announce before he officially retired.

I would be curious to know when Waller made the decision to run and when Tate realized that Waller intended to run against him. I imagine Tate would have known for quite some time that it would be happening by virtue of his GOP connections in the state.

420 said...

Finally a valentines day I get to spend talking to both sides. Red wine with Josh and later bourbon with the Tatester. It sure is goode to be me. This race sure is shaping up to put me in a great position regardless of the winner.

Anonymous said...

@ 6:37

As Whitney once said, crack is whack.

Anonymous said...

How long are you going to make us wait Chris???

Anonymous said...

The best southern novelist could not have created better characters

The populist southern democrat from the North
The entitled redhead from Rankin with few friends but lots of money
The dignified gentleman who has led a strong judicary
The rogue puppy from a republican stronghold whose youth destroys his chances

Then— the real players:
The redhead’s staff with their issues
The kingmaker from Texas
The Redhead’s advisor who is loyal to the judge’s advisor as well
The House members tasting blood
The Senators quietly rejoicing for an end to the tenure of terror
The governor who is confused
The hidden child

This is the stuff that makes a great movie

Anonymous said...

Bill Waller is a smart guy and a savvy politician. He would not get into this race without the encouragement of big money Republicans who despise Tate. You can bet your ass Tate is concerned. Stay tuned and quit speculating.

Anonymous said...

Dunno where 11:01 comes up with his "...the Waller name is not known..." but that's total BS... of course we do! But, it's not just the "name" that convinces you - that's a shallow thought.

Over 85? Hahaha.. 11:01's got some real worrying going on.

Anonymous said...

Which candidate is backed by Frontier Strategies? They seem to latch on to the favorite and then call favors in from power that be. SuperTalk over the next 3 weeks should be interesting to listen to. Whoever they bring on for a friendly interview is clearly who SuperTalk is being paid to promote.

Anonymous said...

I'm in announcement coming soon!

Anonymous said...

Thank you Lord in Heaven!

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Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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