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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
44 comments:
University policy still does not allow employees with enhanced permits to carry without being fired even though they have an open access parking lot in the murder capital of the country.
I hate that for (her?). I always considered that stadium lot to be a really dangerous place to park.
Someone needs to shoot one of the bad guys preying on folks who just need a place to park for work. If that would happen, it might slow the bad guys down. Or, it might not, i guess. Still needs to be done
Good decision on 'their' part.
Don't think an escort will get much traction. You get off work, and wait 45 minutes for a golf cart to take you to your car? How about this. Instead of 5 golfcarts with drivers, put one guy or gal way up high with a good view and a 6.5 PRC bolt gun, and a PA system that covers that entire parking lot. One announcement and then a warning shot.
There was also a shooting outside their Emergency Room last night. Luckily it was the bad guy who was shot by officers
4:54 - according to state law, if the parking lot is accessible to the general public, the employer can NOT prohibit the carrying of a firearm or having an openly displayed weapon in his/her vehicle. If the parking area has restricted entry, such as a guard shack to approve or deny public entry or a pass code to be used for entry, that would be different.
This is pure negligence on UMC's part. That lot should have 24-7 security.
I wonder how often this happens. I doubt this is the first.
New security measure coming “very soon.” Neither timely nor reassuring.
I miss Shimmels
Very smart behavior in a terrifying situation. Good for them.
Very smart behavior in a terrifying situation. Good for them.
Where is the assault in this article?
Give me a ride.
Take my car.
OK.
Runs away.
@5:26. Please do not assume the persons pronouns. You have no idea if it’s a her. It’s 2022….get it right!
If UMC gave a S, they’d have a security guy out there. That parking lot has a long history of criminal activity.
Doesn’t UMC have one of the larger police forces in the state? Privately funded by them- not JPD or capital or whatever else.
@6:14. How does an employee lawfully have a firearm on their walk from the parking lot in the morning and to the parking lot in thr evening if they can't carry it into the hospital per UMC policy? Leaving a handgun in an unattended car just gives a criminal a free gun and can not help prevent an assault until one is on their car with the doors close.
let the employees conceal carry
I know at least one UMMC employee who packs all the time at work in spite of them. Says that when/if that day comes, we'll ALL have to deal with others who'll want to judge us for an event.. but...
according to state law, if the parking lot is accessible to the general public, the employer can NOT prohibit the carrying of a firearm or having an openly displayed weapon in his/her vehicle.
Don Drane, this is false. Yes, the Castle Doctrine in MS regards a driver's vehicle as his/her 'castle' in an unsecured parking lot, which means the employer cannot prohibit employees from keeping firearms in their vehicles there. HOWEVER, employees CAN be fired if they exit their vehicle with their firearm and carry it on employer premises, in violation of the employer's policy. And most employers DO prohibit carrying on the job and/or on their premises, and they enforce that rule, because of the tremendous potential liability associated with allowing it.
It strikes me as odd that the state literally will trust someone to cut into someone's brain but they are not allowed to carry a handgun for self protection.
It should be obvious that UMMC has bigger issues than it's refusal to accept BCBS. Wonder how their financials are looking?
Wow, you got this going on and some idiot on this board is concerned about a pronoun. Wake up and get a freaking life!
First, I work at UMMC and I have never heard of this sort of thing happening at the stadium before. I agree, where is the assault? No, we don’t need to all be packing. 7,000 people park in that lot M-F… they’ve done a good job. Nothing is perfect but jeez… robust police force, person ok, let’s take even more steps (place is monitored and secure, but we can always do better)… I realize it’s fun to pile on UMMC with a smug sense of superiority… I will wait to see how it shakes out but I still feel fine in the stadium lot.
Blue Cross thugs intimidating UMMC employees.
Haha @ 931.. good one!
Don Drane is correct. If the gun stays in the vehicle and the vehicle is locked, the owner of the vehicle on company parking property is protected from termination. See Robert Swindoll v Aurora (now Boeing of Columbus, Mississippi) and Leaf River cases.
UMMC is downplaying the seriousness of this incident. The victim was approached in the lot and tried to get away from the POS by getting in her car. He assaulted her and took her car. I suspect they refer to the victim as “they” because indicating that the victim was female would scare female employees and some might quit and go somewhere that appears to care more about their employees.
The commenter stating this is no big deal because she didn’t get hurt needs to consider that this POS was wearing an ankle monitor and that she could have easily been hurt or killed in such an incident, or kidnapped and raped. It just so happens that she was lucky and is ok. It is silly to minimize this incident - it’s outrageous for anyone to be carjacked. Stealing someone’s property is stealing a portion of their life, since it took many hours of life to earn the money to pay for that property.
If UMMC leadership weren’t Communist scum they would institute a policy that allows employees to conceal carry and provide them lockers to secure their firearms. This hospital is in a s#*thole city full of absolute scum of the earth, who stab and shoot each other constantly, and who are then treated at this hospital. Their family and friends then visit them there. UMMC employees work in a g.d. war zone and the administration can’t provide secure parking for them. It’s ridiculous. If they can’t step up and provide security for their employees they are negligent and discriminatory for having “no gun” policies.
I’m quite sure there are employees there who carry anyway. I have done business there and carry just like I do everywhere else. I have not yet seen a sign with the power to disarm me. And it’s legal because I have the enhanced carry endorsement on my permit. They can put all the “private area” signs up they want but it doesn’t change a thing if you ignore it.
It’s too bad this POS scum wasn’t noticed by a male employee who could have assisted this lady and beaten the POS to a bloody pulp. Apparently he was unarmed but a good beating with the right application of his head against pavement could have done the trick. In the meantime, those who can’t carry can are least carry a non-lethal weapon like pepper spray.
7:01, look up the legal definition of assault.
8:51 - I said nothing about an employee exiting the vehicle with a gun or the Castle Doctrine (which is totally unrelated). My comments were in regard to an employer's policy prohibiting weapons in employee vehicles in the employer's parking lot.
The employee, in the case mentioned, is within the law if he/she is in possession of (carrying or displaying) a firearm or other weapon or leaving it displayed or concealed IN the vehicle. Had (pronoun) been entering or seated in the vehicle at the time of the encounter and blown the head off the perp, (pronoun) would have been protected by state law.
I know nothing about the rules of the facility regarding being an armed pedestrian in the parking lot. I do have experience with an employer policy (that had to be changed) stating that weapons in vehicles of employees was a terminating offense. In that case, an employee was found to have had a rifle and bow and arrow in full display in his vehicle while at work. Accordingly, since the parking lot was and is open to public access, the employer's policy was a violation of state law and the policy was revised.
Whether or not it's wise to leave a firearm in a vehicle is totally beside the point.
Keep voting Democrat
Take that money in the Ole Miss endowment fund and build a new UMC in Madison county. What good is the endowment fund if it is not being used to further education. Bull doze that outdated dinosaur of a hospital, leave Jackson, and maybe, just maybe the UMC med center can improve its reputation as a training center, which is not very high at this point.
Additionally, the Castle Doctrine has nothing to do with Mississippi law that addresses firearms in employee vehicles on company property where an employer has or might have a policy prohibiting that. Let's assume the employee HAS no physical place of residence. Regardless, the statute regarding employer parking lots long predates the state's Castle Doctrine.
Obviously, the employee, in this case, did the right thing; however, if (pronoun) has said, "Hold on, let me get my envelope of cash for you, slid across the seat, retrieved (pronoun) firearm and blown his nut sack to Woodrow Wilson, (pronoun) would have been legally protected from employer sanction.
https://midsouthgunlawyer.com/125-2/guns-employee-vehicles-employer-premises/
Police told WLBT that no weapon was used in the incident, but the nurse was physically assaulted.
5:29 is absolutely correct. First, UMMC slow walked this press release. Second, it's not entirely factual. The female employee was choked, twice. She tried to hand him her keys from the get go but he was not having it. He choked her once he was in the vehicle, and again when she was out of it, per people that work closely with her. She's lucky to be alive. I can assure you that if something like this happens to my wife that works there, UMMC will be on the hook. They have one of the largest police forces in the state. There is no reason this should go on in parking lot known to be sketchy. Lou Ann, are you listening? If this happens again, I hope they come for you for being negligent for not being proactive.
Get out NOW- while you can
"This is pure negligence on UMC's part. That lot should have 24-7 security." They do. They're all over at the well lit ER area.
I could never work for UMC, solely because I don't think it's safe to walk to that parking lot when it's dark. Safety of employees matters.
9:27, I also worked for UMMC and my experience was the opposite of your.
I had coworkers who were threatened and accosted by strangers in that parking lot multiple times. It was commonly known as a dangerous spot.
So my anecdotal experience is that this is not the first occurance and I see no reason to call women that are concerned for their safety "smug". If it is a non-issue as you state, then what is the harm in posting a guard in the lot and can enjoy an uneventful evening and collect a paycheck for his mere presence and the ladies can feel safe. They certainly have the funds.
My son works with the nurse( female) that was assaulted . She was choked before she escaped to run away from the guy . UMC is leaving this part out as well as several cars were broken into . UMC needs to have a 24/7 guard at the point of entry of the stadium parking lot , a patrol office riding around the parking lot would be helpful as well. UMC NEEDS to do this to keep its employees safe and want to stay there to work. There are plenty of other hospitals and doctor offices to work.
Just carry a gun everywhere. As a sheriff once told me in regards to signs saying you can’t carry in certain places, if it’s properly concealed how will anyone know you have it. Obviously that goes away if you ever have to use it, but I’d rather be in trouble than dead.
The employee should've left a hot one in the criminal's skull
THis is horrible, everyone is or will pack guns and then when they shoot dont say a word, becuase you didn't protect them and we are not professionals. we dotn knwo he isa good boy and would have stopped choking eventually. I mean everybody pays taxes and now they have to pay for security also
So I guess State should step in and solve crime problem like they solved water problem. wake up Jackson how good is your leadership when someone else has to do their Job?
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