Well, well, well. Leftenent Governor Delbert Hosemann wants to make a go of it for Governor.
Tuesday, May 13, 2025
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Trollfest '09
Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).
Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.
Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".
In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.
In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.
Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.
Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
Trollfest '07
Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.
If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!
This is definitely a Beaver production.
Note: Security provided by INS.
69 comments:
He’s the closest we have to an honest man in state leadership, but he can’t win the nomination due to the MAGA loons having a majority within the GOP. Because Delbert dares to consider the plight of ALL Mississippians, he is branded as a RINO.
Beanpole needs to get a life, he doesn't seem to want to go home for some reason.
Too old, too impaired, too much Democrat.
Delbert will turn 78 in a few months. He fell over and passed out at the podium. We’ve had Biden and now Trump. When will these elderly folks go home? They aren’t capable of working and grinding at a fast pace all day. They are simply too old.
Will lose by a decimal point
12:09 AM, that’s funny!
Regarding Delbert “daring” to consider the plight of ALL Mississippians, Hoseman showed his true Democrat spots when he changed the deal on the 16th section properties within the City of Madison - AFTER the homes were built.
Delbert is CLASSIC Republican In Name Only, and if he’s “the closest we have to an honest man in state leadership,” we’re in even worse shape than most thought.
Prediction: Bill Crawford and Yellow Dog Sid Salter will provide support (via their written opinions) Hoseman for Gov during the Republican primary, then swap to whoever the Democrat is in the General. Then if Hoseman wins the primary, it becomes a win, win for Democrats either way.
My response is: Please God no, have mercy on us !! I had the same response when I heard Cowboy Andy Gipson's debut album already this week.
Save your $$ Delbert! Not gonna happen! Gunn yes! Mike Hurst even better!
Trump isn't working and grinding at a fast pace? Sure, whatever you say.
Did he happen to announce which political party he intends to run as? R or D?
God forbid we have an honest Governor with an IQ over 120 and who has a clue about what government is intended to do...improve the lives of the citizens.
I don't mind Hosemann but he will soon be 78 years old and with still a couple of years to go before the election, his age will likely prevent him from doing the job.
He should go home after this term and enjoy the time he has left.
Heck no. Shad or Duff or someone who can govern like Desantis has.
Ditto, 7:31. If 6:45 doesn’t think Trump is working at a fast pace, he needs to get out of his parents’ basement more.
Mississippi can do a lot better than Delbert Hoseman.
Delbert has provided steady wise leadership. Instead of drastically changing the state finances, he’s adopted a reasoned approach. Kansas, Louisiana (Jindal), and West Virginia went with drastic changes and the Republicans lost the governorship.
I applaud his approach. I'm not saying I have always agreed with him. It's better than someone jumping from hot issue to hot issue to score points.
7:54 AM, it’s always hilarious hearing about IQ, education, etc., from Democrats - that can’t win without the voter base that’s so uneducated that they fall for the same failures running cities like child killing capital Jackson, MS into the ground with crime and chaos.
Since you lefties are so into IQ, will you support an IQ test for all current members of congress?
NGL, I like the guy and may vote for him. He's a good man but is definitely pushing the age limit. Our other choices will likely be Shad White and Lynn Fitch. Shad is young and smart, but he's also a relentless self promoter. He also needs to tackle the MDOC issues before that becomes the next NYT scandal in MS. (But, if he does that, the political blowback could take him out of the running.) Fitch...unfortunately she may have a chance for the simple reason that she refuses to prosecute anyone with political connections or that makes a big enough donation to her campaign fund. (If you keep chasing the easy targets, you'll never get a vote from me.) While any of the three would be a step up from Tater, Delbert is the best of the three.
Nothing against Hoseman. 7:31 AM mentioned Mike Hurst. Now that would be incredible.
Delbert is a good man. He will not govern by Twitter. He is thoughtful, soft spoken, and measured, which doesn't play well with the torches and pitchforks crew. But he would be a thoughtful and effective governor.
Please, PLEASE.....
Don't even suggest useless and worthless Lynn Fitch.
Philip Gunn would be ready to go to work on day one !
His age disqualifies him from my vote.
Its not the only thing, but its a non starter after that.
All these comments and no one has mentioned Tommy Duff. He’s your next governor.
I would prefer to let my mortal enemies slowly lower me into an active volcano spewing hot magma, than watch this octogenarian run the state.
Personally, I don't care for Gunn. Liked him until I met him, at an event we were doing, I was the point person. Unfortunately, he looked so far down his nose at me, put a permanent mark in my memory. I guess I wasn't wealthy enough, political enough, etc. Done other events where CEOs flew in and were gracious to everybody. Yet this man from Clinton treated others as if he had stepped in something a dog left in the yard.
Plz no
Very well said, 9:27
He will make Mississippi look good as a one term governor. The rest of the nation might think we are actually moving out of the dark ages. Even some Mississippians will think so too. After four years he can retire and we can do whatever....
Too old and too liberal
Delbert always has his finger in the wind. But they all do. Looks like I'm going to have to hold my nose again this time and at least vote for someone. I've had to do that a lot since I started voting a long time ago.
Delbert, please PLEASE don't run those insipid TV commercials again. I realize those cutesy ads allow you to dodge positions on the issues, but I think people have had enough of that from you.
As a member of Generation Z, I judge politicians by their Minecraft servers. It is a great place to meet and interact with a politician. And if they dont have a Minecraft server then they are too fucking old.
@12:09 I immediately disregard the asinine opinion of anyone who says something “maga loon” since that outs the speaker as either willfully ignorant or an outright liar.
Seldom wrong but never in doubt.
Might win a general, won't win a primary.
Biden 2.0. I saw a recent straw poll where Shad and Philip Gunn were neck and neck at the top. Gunn has a good shot (no pun intended) if he can raise some money.
@10:32. I’ve known Philip Gunn for years and he and his wife have always been some of the kindest and most generous people. Maybe he just came across the wrong way that day.
Enlighten me @ 1:44 PM. What's a Minecraft servers?
Too old. Too slick. Too RINO.
78 year old Delbert and Tater and the rest of the RINOs lost me for good when they served us all a plate of crap claiming it was the elimination of the state income tax.
12:09 Exactly. He is knowledgeable and extremely qualified. He does not play political games.
All of you saying "too old"" - guess what? You're heading there fast. Remember the attitude you have now as those younger dish it out to you. Will be a tough life lesson for you.
ANYone BUT SHAD! I used to think he was a nice and studious little fellow, doing the job he was appointed to do, protecting the people's money. But NO, little Chihuahua dog became arrogant and accusing, writing books and mastering social media and such. Who is doing his current job now, because it certainly isn't him!
Being Governor suits Gunn perfectly. A weak position that nobody expects much from.
As a rural landowner Delbert scares the hell out of me with some issues coming up and his history with eminent domain. And if you think that honest man doesn’t attempt to push through legislation to get kith and kin out of a mess, then you don’t realize how much like the rest of the politicians he really is.
@10:32 I had the same experience with Gipson. Liked him until I met him in person at a small event. Was all hat and no substance. Was supposed to deliver an update on some issues but it was nothing more than a campaign speech. That aw shucks shtick is old.
I take back everything I ever said about Shad.
Anybody but Hosemann.
Shad is not ready. He needs to mature some if he wants to stay relevant. Calm down with the theatrics and social media antics. Gipson is a good Ag commissioner. That’s where he needs to stay. Delbert is too old. He would be 80-84 during his term. Lynn Fitch. No. Just no. I would say Gunn or Mike Hurst.
I don’t think having group chats with conspiracy theorists and golfing counts as work so much. But hey, his sycophants kissing his feet would surely object.
Damn, despite what everybody has been reporting, that didn't sound like an announcement of GOING TO, at least to my ears. Sounded just like what he has been saying for the past couple of years (hell, going back a decade or more - remember when he announced his intent to take the deceased Senator Cochran's seat, although he was years before dying?))
Delbert, as he said, still has a job to do, and he is trying to keep himself important, not the lame duck that he is. IMO he will be lucky to survive the upcoming special session without being crucified both by 'his members' and by the public for failure to take care of the state's business.
And if they dont have a Minecraft server then they are too fucking old
Ngl this is based and red pilled
The Republicans in Madison County that Hosemann sacrificed in the recent redistricting aren't going to forget how he saved NEJax (and his own neighborhood) from Democrat representation at their expense. He'll get a rude awakening at our precincts come primary time to our long memories.
"government is intended to do...improve the lives of the citizens." -- NO ! the "government's" place is to leave us the hell alone and enforce the law. We should exercise individual responsibility and not be looking for someone else or "the 'government' to improve our lives". Makes me sick and angry when I hear that whining entitlement and dependance upon "the government" mentality expressed!
10:32, I had exactly the same feeling about Gunn. That's probably not coincidental, so there must be something there.
Delbert's age may, in fact, be a deterrent to many people voting for him. Also, I wish he were a lot more conservative, because I can tell you, the guy's brilliant. Plus, there's NOBODY of any age who's gonna out work him! The guy never rests!
I’m one that said in this thread “too old”. When I’m 78 there is no way that I can keep the pace that I do now at work. I’m currently working at such at high level and fast pace, that I won’t be able to do it at 78. As a matter of fact, if I can still do it at 78, that just means I’m slacking now.
Andy Gipson will ride a white horse to his inauguration as Governor wearing cowboy hat the size of Rhode Island.
Gunn dictated to House Members who adhered to Instruction, Shad is writing another Book, Gipson lost his Hat-Now what?
He’s 100.
No, Gunn wasn't having a bad night. I've always thought him to be the most arrogant politician this state has ever seen.
Now - OK 2:17; Please tell us how Delbert will win the general but won't win the primary.
I think we need a polished man in the governor's office. About all that office is good for is representing the state in industrial development and recruitment situations - when a corporate jet lands here with an eye on this state.
We do not need a doofus with bright red cheeks, somebody with a name nobody can pronounce, a clown who can't speak the king's English, a Jerry Clower wannabe wearing a cowboy hat or a grown man who appears to be 19 years old citing his 'DOGE' accomplishments.
I seriously doubt Mike Hurst wants this job, but he would fit the bill. He's too young to die on this hill.
I won't mention Fitch, other than to say, "PLEASE, NO".
Remember GUNN for this ….no public initiative and referendum…..He’s counting on people’s short memories
Delbert killed the VOTER INITIATIVE!
@7:41 Gunn's version of the public initiative was workable, but not as good as the one that we did have but Delbert's version completely blocked our initiative.
If the clamor for a public initiative was even remotely as loud as you potheads make it out to be the Legislature would have passed the legislation sessions ago. You can blame Bomgars for the demise.
7:41 here, not a pothead, what I was thinking about is term limits and voter recall via initiatives and referendum, the legislators are certainly not going to pass that! Broaden your horizons and try to think past the weed debacle…they couldn’t even copy other states that have successfully implemented the “weed”
Policy
For those saying Gunn is arrogant, have you ever met Tate Reeves? He literally won't acknowledge you if you're not in his circle or can't do something for him. Gunn is conservative, but he's smart enough to know that we need certain changes to move forward in this state (changing the flag). The only things that will go against him are the backwoods hillbillies that are still mad about the flag and the liberals mad about Dobbs. Hurst is an interesting option too. I had not heard of that but I like him. Definitely don't need the Mormon billionaire.
How many times did you qualify a term limits initiative in the past?
So, so fundamentally flawed for you to think that government exists to IMPROVE our lives. In a free society such as ours, the government should only exist to PROTECT our lives.
Delbert is a closet Communist.
He loves nothing more than power and control - while attempting to appear like he loves the people.
"but he's a GOOD MAN". Somebody tell me one good thing he has done that benefits me, the regular old tax paying, working guy who's been getting up every day for work for the past 30 years.
He seems like a lifelong government worker who wants nothing more than another step up the ladder.
Also, i've never seen one conservative cause that he has championed.
I won't forget Gunn and how long he held our state back on higher percentage alcohol. Only when he was called out for giving Clinton resort status while holding the entire state back did he stop killing legislation related to this. That and oversharing at MEC 2024 annual convention and the same thing everyone else has said, he will not have my vote at all to start.
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