Sunday, September 25, 2011

WSJ: Rest of country surrenders to the SEC

The Wall Street Journal reported tonight:

"The rest of college football formally surrendered to the Southeastern Conference Sunday, ending a decades-long war that had become hopelessly one-sided.

The surrender took place just outside Appomattox, Va. SEC officials declined to explain why this site was chosen.

"What began 85 years ago in Pasadena has been finished today," the SEC said in a statement, referring to Alabama's 1926 Rose Bowl victory over Washington, which established Southern schools as a threat. "This is our sport now."



The commissioners of major-college football's other 10 conferences made the decision to capitulate in an emergency conference call Saturday night, following LSU's 47-21 demolition of West Virginia. The rout was the latest in a series of unfortunate encounters between SEC schools and supposedly quality opponents, including LSU-Oregon Sept. 3, Alabama-Michigan State in January and the last five national-title games, only one of which was in doubt at the end.

The terms of the surrender were released by the SEC. They include a number of reforms that seek to restore some dignity to the rest of college football, while giving the SEC its proper due:

The national championship: The Bowl Championship Series title game will continue to be held, but just as a matter of ceremony and to stimulate the economy. The real national-championship game will be designated each year by the SEC. This year it's LSU at Alabama, Nov. 5.

National-championship rematches: The SEC also reserves the right to campaign for an LSU-Alabama rematch in the BCS "title" game if the initial meeting is close and there are no other undefeated major-conference schools at season's end. The rest of college football will not bring up 2006, when SEC partisans pilloried the idea of an Ohio State-Michigan title-game rematch.
.." Rest of Article

JJ has been unable to confirm a rumor claiming Ole Miss was shipped to the SWAC as part of the deal or that the idea of leaving the SEC for the SWAC was Pete Boone's idea.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

See page B3 of today's Crying Liar. Even the service station alumni are up in arms.

Anonymous said...

Maybe Willima Winter will write another letter or maybe he wont, he can't decide.

Anderson said...

Off topic, I see from Steve Simpson's ad that he is going to "fight Obamacare."

Really?

J. Kev said...

Couple of observations:

Most LSU band-wagoneers jumped on in the last decade. Prior to Saban's arrival, LSU was mediocre. I think the average tenure of an LSU coach in the quarter-century before DiNardo was something like 3years. Only in the last 10 years have LSU "fans" (vast majority of whom, like Bama "fans" have no connection to the school) decided they'd be for LSU.

Anderson:

I suspect Simpson's ad is a reminder that liberal Democrat Jim Hood, in deference to his political base, refused to file suit to stop Obamacare.

Anonymous said...

2:53: As far as I'm concerned, being a fan IS their connection, so don't go running down any school based on who goes to the ball games and cheers their team on. It's like that with Ole Miss, State, USM and every other school in the country. BTW, I'm an Alabama fan, graduate, son and father of an Alabama graduate, and I'm married to one. Does that make me connected?

Anonymous said...

Alabama rules the world in redneck "McFarland Avenue walk on alumni" screaming at your kids as they walk toward BDS for a phucking football game suck.

You suck. Alabama sucks, and your redneck NASCAR 10th grade walk-on alumni SUCK.

THE WORLD HATES YOUR ASS EVEN MORE THAT THE DREAMERS AT TSUN.

Anonymous said...

6:09 All that jealousy is really unhealthy

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Trollfest '09

Trollfest '07 was such a success that Jackson Jambalaya will once again host Trollfest '09. Catch this great event which will leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Othor Cain and his band, The Black Power Structure headline the night while Sonjay Poontang returns for an encore performance. Former Frank Melton bodyguard Marcus Wright makes his premier appearance at Trollfest singing "I'm a Sweet Transvestite" from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show." Kamikaze will sing his new hit, “How I sold out to da Man.” Robbie Bell again performs: “Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be Bells” and “Any friend of Ed Peters is a friend of mine”. After the show, Ms. Bell will autograph copies of her mug shot photos. In a salute to “Dancing with the Stars”, Ms. Bell and Hinds County District Attorney Robert Smith will dance the Wango Tango.

Wrestling returns, except this time it will be a Battle Royal with Othor Cain, Ben Allen, Kim Wade, Haley Fisackerly, Alan Lange, and “Big Cat” Donna Ladd all in the ring at the same time. The Battle Royal will be in a steel cage, no time limit, no referee, and the losers must leave town. Marshand Crisler will be the honorary referee (as it gives him a title without actually having to do anything).


Meet KIM Waaaaaade at the Entergy Tent. For five pesos, Kim will sell you a chance to win a deed to a crack house on Ridgeway Street stuffed in the Howard Industries pinata. Don't worry if the pinata is beaten to shreds, as Mr. Wade has Jose, Emmanuel, and Carlos, all illegal immigrants, available as replacements for the it. Upon leaving the Entergy tent, fig leaves will be available in case Entergy literally takes everything you have as part of its Trollfest ticket price adjustment charge.

Donna Ladd of The Jackson Free Press will give several classes on learning how to write. Smearing, writing without factchecking, and reporting only one side of a story will be covered. A donation to pay their taxes will be accepted and she will be signing copies of their former federal tax liens. Ms. Ladd will give a dramatic reading of her two award-winning essays (They received The Jackson Free Press "Best Of" awards.) "Why everything is always about me" and "Why I cover murders better than anyone else in Jackson".

In the spirit of helping those who are less fortunate, Trollfest '09 adopts a cause for which a portion of the proceeds and donations will be donated: Keeping Frank Melton in his home. The “Keep Frank Melton From Being Homeless” booth will sell chances for five dollars to pin the tail on the jackass. John Reeves has graciously volunteered to be the jackass for this honorable excursion into saving Frank's ass. What's an ass between two friends after all? If Mr. Reeves is unable to um, perform, Speaker Billy McCoy has also volunteered as when the word “jackass” was mentioned he immediately ran as fast as he could to sign up.


In order to help clean up the legal profession, Adam Kilgore of the Mississippi Bar will be giving away free, round-trip plane tickets to the North Pole where they keep their bar complaint forms (which are NOT available online). If you don't want to go to the North Pole, you can enjoy Brant Brantley's (of the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance) free guided tours of the quicksand field over by High Street where all complaints against judges disappear. If for some reason you are unable to control yourself, never fear; Judge Houston Patton will operate his jail where no lawyers are needed or allowed as you just sit there for minutes... hours.... months...years until he decides he is tired of you sitting in his jail. Do not think Judge Patton is a bad judge however as he plans to serve free Mad Dog 20/20 to all inmates.

Trollfest '09 is a pet-friendly event as well. Feel free to bring your dog with you and do not worry if your pet gets hungry, as employees of the Jackson Zoo will be on hand to provide some of their animals as food when it gets to be feeding time for your little loved one.

Relax at the Fox News Tent. Since there are only three blonde reporters in Jackson (being blonde is a requirement for working at Fox News), Megan and Kathryn from WAPT and Wendy from WLBT will be on loan to Fox. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both and a torn-up Obama yard sign will entitle you to free drinks served by Megan, Wendy, and Kathryn. Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required. Just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '09 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.


Note: Security provided by INS.

Trollfest '07

Jackson Jambalaya is the home of Trollfest '07. Catch this great event which promises to leave NE Jackson & Fondren in flames. Sonjay Poontang and his band headline the night with a special steel cage, no time limit "loser must leave town" bout between Alan Lange and "Big Cat"Donna Ladd following afterwards. Kamikaze will perform his new song F*** Bush, he's still a _____. Did I mention there was no referee? Dr. Heddy Matthias and Lori Gregory will face off in the undercard dueling with dangling participles and other um, devices. Robbie Bell will perform Her two latest songs: My Best Friends are in the Media and Mama's, Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be George Bell. Sid Salter of The Clarion-Ledger will host "Pin the Tail on the Trial Lawyer", sponsored by State Farm.

There will be a hugging booth where in exchange for your young son, Frank Melton will give you a loooong hug. Trollfest will have a dunking booth where Muhammed the terrorist will curse you to Allah as you try to hit a target that will drop him into a vat of pig grease. However, in the true spirit of Separate But Equal, Don Imus and someone from NE Jackson will also sit in the dunking booth for an equal amount of time. Tom Head will give a reading for two hours on why he can't figure out who the hell he is. Cliff Cargill will give lessons with his .80 caliber desert eagle, using Frank Melton photos as targets. Tackleberry will be on hand for an autograph session. KIM Waaaaaade will be passing out free titles and deeds to crackhouses formerly owned by The Wood Street Players.

If you get tired come relax at the Fox News Tent. To gain admittance to the VIP section, bring either your Republican Party ID card or a Rebel Flag. Bringing both will entitle you to free drinks.Get your tickets now. Since this is an event for trolls, no ID is required, just bring the hate. Bring the family, Trollfest '07 is for EVERYONE!!!

This is definitely a Beaver production.

Note: Security provided by INS
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